Discordant Harmony
by Hari-Aisu
Summary: What happens when new artist Yagami Raito manages to capture the attention of socially inept, anonymous artist L Lawliet? Hilarity, of course. Matchmakers, troublesome sisters, and crazy lawyers pretending to be drag queens? What is this world coming to?
1. Back to the Basics

Title:_** Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter One: _Back to the Basics_

* * *

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

Yagami Raito's eye twitched as the clock hanging on the wall of the small cafe he was residing in mocked him cruelly by continuing to count the minutes by.

1:38 p.m. it read.

His manager was supposed to be here by 1:15. Damn ass-hole had the audacity to actually be late! I mean, who kept Raito, one of the newest up and coming 1st class artists of Japan, waiting for almost 20 minutes?! And without any calls to notify him of the tardiness, no less!

Oh, this guy was going to hear the bitching of his life.

"I'm so sorry I'm late!" An anxious cry cut through the 23 year old's thoughts as a dark haired man in his mid to late twenties ran into the dim cafe, maneuvering his way through waiter's and patrons, finally making his way to where Raito sat down. A precarious smile sat on Matsuda Touta's face as he plopped a case on the table and hunkered down on a chair across from the simmering younger man. "Before you get mad, Yagami-kun, you have to listen to this. After you hear this news, I can say, with utmost confidence, that you will love me unconditionally."

A dubious expression settled over Raito's features as Matsuda's grin dropped a fraction.

"How about for the next five minutes?" Matsuda uselessly bargained.

Still not happening, if the look on Raito's face was any indication. Disgust had a way of making itself known, whether the owner wanted it to or not. In this case, Raito didn't really give a damn.

"Are you going to tell me this 'great news,' of am I going to have to fire you, Matsuda?" Raito reclined back comfortably on his chair as the slightly older man began to panic in earnest. "Of course not, Yagami-kun! It's just, the reason I was late was..."

Matsuda grinned as he then began to give himself a drum roll on the table, as local bystanders stared at the odd, strangely cheerful manager. Raito's blood pressure began to rise, steadily but surely, as Matsuda began to add vocal sound effects to said banging.

"Bum-bum-bum-bum-bum-bum-bu-"

"Matsuda!" Raito yelled in both embarrassment and aggravation. "Just tell me what's got you so damned excited already!"

A huge grin spread across the man's cheeks as he then exploded with the 'great news.' "I got you a spot on the latest exhibition in the Tokyo National Museum!" Matsuda exclaimed loudly. Several people stopped what they were doing once again, this time staring at Raito awe-struck. Raito would have enjoyed it, if not for the overwhelming shock that had inhabited his body and mind.

"You... you... you..." Raito could barely even speak, and that was an injustice in itself.

Matsuda grinned cheesily as he nodded eagerly. Raito was silent for a moment, allowing his mind to finally process just what Matsuda had just told him. The exhibit... the same exhibit that began in just two weeks?!

"But, how did... Two weeks, that's just not enough time to-"

"Raito, everything has been taken care of." Matsuda began, knowing enough about the man's meticulous planning to see just what it was he was freaking out about. "A friend of mine has some ties with the head of the art department, and managed to get the head honcho to take a look at your latest series. He was so impressed with it, that he wanted to get his hands on it as soon as possible. After some well placed digging, I managed to get you a spot within the new exhibit opening up. All we have to do is bring in all your latest sensations and instruct where to set them up. For all the work you usually do, this'll be a piece of cake!"

Raito thought through this, knowing that this could be his official 'break' into the artisan's community. This was a big exhibit, and if he managed to gather enough attention...

"Matsuda," Raito began shakily. "If you weren't such a dork, I'd kiss you right now."

Matsuda pouted before hanging his head in shame.

"Aw, fiddlesticks."

* * *

Yagami Raito was a charmed young man. Good looks, high I.Q., full of so much talent and potential; who wouldn't want to be him? He was on a pedestal, praised by many and admired by many more. Not just that, Raito was also steadily gaining success, bringing much attention to his ideals his paintings heavily incorporated.

The fame and fortune was just an added bonus.

Yet, with all this going on, Raito's main ambition, even if he tried to cover it up with sugar coated words and sweet, humble smiles, was to be the best. Anything less was completely unsatisfactory.

The boy had finished high school two years before his other classmates, all with the highest grade point average his school had ever seen. All of his professors and counselors had tried to shove so many potential careers down his throat; detective, professor, lawyer... they were all careers he did find interesting, yes, but none of them were really his true **passion**.

At the end of the day, painting was what called to him, and it helped that he was damned good at it as well.

Yes, Raito had always been the best at everything, and had even managed to reach out for his dream, but... he yearned for something more. There was an emptiness inside the 23-year-old aching to be filled, and Raito didn't quite know what it was.

At least, not yet.

Sepia eyes closed as Raito crashed onto his black leather couch, the colorful atmosphere of his apartment soothing his frayed nerves. Both he and Matsuda had been setting up the final touches of his portion of the exhibit, since Raito refused to have anyone else set up his pieces. They were connected together in such a way that you had to look deeper than what was just painted on the portraits, and Raito doubted they would get it right. His scheme was a merry-go-round of perfection, but it worked, and if it wasn't broken, he didn't see the need to fix it.

The short notice did nothing to help the poor man, but he had managed to finish his display with two days left to spare. Raito was nothing, if not a perfectionist.

Everyone would love it, and if they did not...

Well, what the hell did they know about art, anyway?

Yet, as he thought back on his day, Raito remembered the various paintings that had caught his eye in the farthest corner of the gallery...

God, they had been both beautiful and disturbing all at once.

'I must go see those paintings the next time I go to the gallery...' Raito longingly thought. 'They were simply on another plain of genius that I have yet to have seen! Who could have painted such master pieces?'

Before Raito could contemplate the pictures further, a hellish sound resonated from his jacket pocket, which hung innocently by the door...

"_**A few times I've been around that track, so it's not just gonna happen like that, 'cause I ain't no hollaback girl; I ain't no hollaback girl!**_"

On the other side of the room.

It seemed getting up was inevitable, unless he wanted to listen to the song from hell for the next three hours.

"_**Let me hear you say: this shit is Bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S! This shit is Bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!**_"

"God damn it, Sayu!"

"_**Again! This shit is Bananas! B-A-N-A-!**_"

It seemed the little brat had once again tampered with his cell phone; how, he would never know. Fucking Gwen Stefani. If only there was a way to kill her by just writing down her name somewhere, preferably by heart attack! But that was just a ridiculous.

A killer notebook. Try that one on for size, Stephen King.

"Sayu? What the hell do you want?" Raito finally get to the cell, answering as pissed as he could sound. Not that it would faze the 19-year-old.

"Hey onii-chan!"

The girl was perpetually cheerful ALL THE TIME!

"Ah, I can feel the broodiness already, and it hasn't even been three seconds! How is my angsty, artistic older brother in all his conformity-hating glory?" Sayu's voice tinkled like soft bells, her playful tone managing to pull a small smile on the disgruntled artist's face.

"Picking on your insanely handsome, innocent big brother already, Sayu-chan? Now that's just low for you, sis. Now why did you call me? I doubt it was to try to find some underlying, non-existent insecurity."

Raito could almost see the pout on the young woman's face, as her attempts at subtlety failed.

And badly.

"Onii-chaaaaaan... I love you. Why would you just assume that every time I call, it's just for-"

"Sayu. What do you want?" Raito interrupted without a thought. There was only so much fluff he could take.

A pause.

Raito knew that wasn't going to last very long.

"Can I get a ticket to your new exhibit? Please, please, please, please onii-chan?! I'll love you forever and ever and ever!" Sayu's high pitched begging almost destroyed the 23-year-old's ear drums as Raito held the phone away from his ear. "Onii-chan? Are you there? Huh?"

Raito faltered for only the slightest of moments.

Sister **Plus** Exhibit **Equaled** Most Probable Mayhem

But...

A picture of Sayu's crushed face came to mind, beating his morally-conscious conscience to submission.

"Sayu? I'll... see what I can do."

A high pitched squeal crackled through the phone line as Raito's eyebrow twitched in agitation. The girl knew she had just been guaranteed a ticket.

Damn, he was a softie.

"Thank you, onii-chan!"

"Yeah, whatever. You're appreciative. Lovely. I've got to go now, if it isn't too much to ask?" Raito's sarcasm covered up his embarrassment rather nicely. Praise was all well and good, but the regret he knew he was going to feel later on smothered that nice feeling rather quickly.

Sayu had a way of... livening up any occasion with her perky disposition and equally blunt approach.

Oh, what did he just walk himself into?

"Ok, onii-chan. Call me when you get the tickets! I'll see ya later; love you muchly! Bysies!" Sayu's energetic voice cut off as a small beep signaled the end of the conversation. Raito sighed as he stared at the cell phone in his hand before reluctantly dialing his manager's phone number.

Yay. Dim wit number two, come on down.

"Hey, Yagami-kun!" Cried a joyous Matsuda.

"Hey Matsuda." Raito sighed once more, knowing he was going to regret these next series of wordsthat were about to out of his mouth. "I need a favor."

Hell had just frozen over, and oceans all over the world were splitting open as Raito narrowed his eyes in irritation.

He now officially owed his manager a favor.

Damn.

* * *

"Damn it, Sayu, don't you dare embarrass me." Chocolate brown met chocolate brown as Raito glared down at his younger sibling, daring her to contradict him.

Sayu smiled innocently as she grabbed onto her brother's hand and ignored the rapidly increasing blush on the handsome man's face. "Well, come on then! Show me around, Picasso!"

The frazzled 23-year-old shook his head as they both handed their tickets to the man in front of the gallery gate and entered the prestigious exhibit. Sayu's face immediately brightened even further, which Raito didn't even know was possible, as the myriad of colors bombarded them all at once.

Raito pulled them forward as he ignored the multitude of stares directed their way. He was used to it at this point, and it wasn't very often that he actually got to share his artistic successes with members of his family. His father thought this was all a waste of time and often asked him when he would go back to school to become an officer like himself, and his mother, though supportive, never actually came to any of Raito's events.

Sayu was all he had when it came to these things, and really, that was enough.

Literally.

"So what do you want to see first? Now, take your time. I know it takes you awhile to process these things..." Raito smirked at his little sister as the hyperactive girl ignored her brother's comments and simply pulled him forward, gushing over and pointing at the attractions that seemingly caught her eye in particular.

If the other snobbish patrons hadn't been staring before, they definitely were now.

And Sayu hadn't even reached halfway to full capacity of hyperness yet. Raito sighed and whispered a prayer to his poor feet.

'Forgive me, darlings.'

Sayu began talking in high speed, the words almost coming out in gibberish nonsense. Raito smiled while trailing behind the incredibly bubbly teen, knowing that this kind of excitement was genuine, even if a bit terrifying.

For the next hour and a half, both Raito and Sayu looked at the pieces with a critical eye, (or at least Raito did) and gave their opinions on each painting and sculpture that caught their attentions.

"It looks like something vomited all over the canvas."

"It's called surrealism, smart ass. Look at it from a different perspective."

"My perspective's fine, it's the painting that's crappy."

"Hmph."

Obviously, they did not agree very often, and tended not to be quiet about it.

"..."

"Oh, look at that, Raito!"

"..."

"Raito?"

"Is that... what I think it is?"

Sayu sweat dropped.

"... ... maybe."

"..."

"Ok, moving on!"

"Hey, Sayu?"

"Yeah, Raito?"

"Please tell me that's not a huge unicorn in the middle of the gallery."

"What's the big deal? You've already seen it, haven't you?"

"I must have blanked it from my memory the last time I was here. Oh God... Nothing that horrendous should ever meet my gaze... and I mean EVER."

"Unicorn-hater."

"Yes, I'm anti-unicorn and proud of it. Suck on that, girlie-girl."

"Whatever! You're just jealous cuz I'm prettier than you!"

"... ... are not"

Hair flip.

"You suck on that, Mr.I'mtoosexy."

Finger flip.

Raito rolled his eyes as Sayu finally let go of his hand (and the inappropriate gesture) and began to study a random painting in front of them. The aggravated brunette sighed once again as he allowed his eyes to roam, a familiar dark corner capturing his attention at once.

Dark, decrepit colors morbidly twisted together as bodies hung off the canvas, almost draping off the wooden slate. His feet moved forward, as Sayu's ramblings were pushed to the back of his head. The realism in the paintings was extraordinary, making Raito feel that if he just reached forward, the cold dead skin would be there to touch...

"Strange, isn't it?"

Raito blinked as he turned to his side, a low baritone voice breaking through his internal musings. He noticed he was by himself in the virtually isolated corner, except for the person who had spoken to him... which by the way...

A shaggy, dark-haired man bordering on anorexic-thin stood next to him, back hunched over as he watched Raito with dark, almost completely black eyes. A thumb nestled itself on the man's lower lip, a blank look enveloping his pale face. Raito glanced back at the painting, tilting his head to the side.

"No... not weird. Society's rotting from the outside, in. I think the painting perfectly describes that. Over dramatic, maybe, but not weird." The other man regarded Raito strangely, covering his impression of the young man quietly. "Really? Now how did you come to the conclusion that this painting was about society, never the less rotting..."

"The open sores on their bodies look as if something has eaten through the skin, hence the rotting over, and none of the bodies hold any similarities to the other. It's almost like a collage of different races and sexes... I'm guessing they all signify the different parts of the world. Not just that, look at how gruesome the bodies look... all the wounds look self inflicted, though." Raito explained all of this calmly without the frustration he usually felt when explaining himself. There was something about this man that screamed that he knew more than he actually let on; something that Raito did not.

It was almost... exciting. Not many people could make Raito feel anxious, if anything.

"Do you know who painted this piece of work?" Raito asked the man, as he looked for a signature, but came up short. The man slyly smiled back at the naive artist, noting the curiosity in the boy's mahogany depths.

"The rumor going around is that L painted this piece, but you know just how rumors are. Never reliable." The man then began to nibble on the digit next to his mouth, carefully eyeing Raito's reaction to the news.

Raito's eyes widened almost comically.

L? As in the world famous artist who no one knew anything about?! The artist that had inspired Raito to paint with amazing pieces and outstanding prestige? That L?!

"This is... L's work?" Raito asked awestruck. A gleam sparkled in the dark haired man's eye as he nodded nonchalantly. "No way!"

"So they say." The enigmatic man pushed his hands inside his jean pockets as he pulled his thumb away from his mouth. He simply stared at Raito while the artist continued to gaze at the painting, star struck.

"Raito!" A sharp screech shocked Raito back into reality as Sayu appeared by his side, looking disgruntled with her older brother. A strange look over came the other man's face as his murky eyes narrowed slightly, regarding Sayu with an iciness that shocked the off-kilter 23-year-old. "Onii-chan left me by myself, and almost ditched me!"

Was it just Raito, or when Sayu had called him onii-chan did the other man look almost... relieved?

Nah...

He was probably just imagining things.

"Sorry Sayu. I was just-"

"No sorrys! Say goodbye to your new friend, and let's go! We don't have much more time to see the rest of the exhibit, especially your stuff!" Before Raito could say anything to the other nameless man, Sayu pulled him away, leaving him to glance back at the strange fellow. Their gazes met for one more instant before Raito turned forward and walked on.

Obsidian eyes trailed after the handsome young man, a smile still playing on his pale lips. He tilted his head to the side, committing the man's backside to memory. This would not be a chance encounter, he would definitely make sure of it.

"Raito, huh..."

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note nor do I own the Song "Holler Back Girl" by Gwen Stefani. Nor would I want to. ((Shivers))

For those who pushed for this story: congratulations. For those who don't know what the hell I'm talking about, go read my other story; "Che Sara, Sara." Once you see the monster that is the artist au, you'll understand what I'm talking about. Expect weekly updates. I'll try to keep you guys 'in the know' on that. So, enjoyment abounds? I hope so...


	2. Into the Deep Blue

Title: **_Discordant Harmony_**

Chapter Two: _Into the Deep Blue_

* * *

Bright colors exploded over multiple canvases as a pair of wide ebony eyes examined the cornucopia of paintings around him. Feet lazily slid against the floor in a medley of shuffles, the tiled texture of the ground becoming scuffed-up in the process. Most would assume the man was not really paying attention to the direction his feet seemed to be taking him.

That was to the common eye, at least.

After several minutes of seemingly endless walking, obsidian eyes finally found their target. Yet, instead of the sight of dark colored portraits and vivid angry details splattered against the wooden templates set upon the wall, another figure caught the reclusive man's calculative eye.

A mop of warm brown hair carefully cropped on top of a perfectly proportioned head made the man freeze in his tracks. L Lawliet couldn't see much of the man from the back, but it seemed that the boy was gazing intently at one of the paintings he, himself, had created and not just loitering half-hazardously.

Unsurprisingly, the man was alone as all the other patrons in the gallery refused to go near the repulsive sights he had set for the public to view.

'These snobs in particular…' L drawled in his head as he continued to gaze at the mysterious young man so captivated with his art. He had doubted his "Dante" Series would make much of an impact in this particular museum, but to see someone so fascinated in such morbid art…

That in itself was interesting, as well.

A strange emotion began to swell within his chest as the dreaded curiosity tickling his senses fought against his better judgment and won. L continued onward until he was right beside the regal but dazed young man. The anonymous artist glanced at the boyish-stranger's now visible visage and almost keeled over in shock.

The man was utterly gorgeous!

Something inside of L shifted once more as he gave into temptation one more time that day and spoke with the beautiful stranger that had most certainly caught him by surprise. His monotone voice almost staggered, but L caught himself and quickly covered the breathlessness of his voice.

"Strange, isn't it?"

As those wide mahogany eyes turned towards the older man, it was quite a bit later on that the eccentric recluse realized just what those feelings inside his chest the younger brunette managed to ignite actually were.

A tiny part of him grudgingly whispered in the back of his head that he would most likely regret this in the long run; talking to this fascinating boy who seemed to garner so much of his interest so quickly- but a much larger part of L adamantly denied such a thing. If anything, he would cherish this first moment that no doubt would lead to many more if the famous artist had anything to do with it. Whatever the outcome of this small encounter, one thing was for certain…

The free fall had begun.

* * *

Raito was quiet after the encounter with the captivating painting and equally strange man. It was afterwards that Raito realized that he had not asked for the mysterious man's name, for once lamenting the loss. There had been something so interesting about the weird looking guy, who had managed to engage in conversation with Raito without making Raito feel as if he had been talking to an idiot. They had only talked for a few minutes, but there had been something in the coal eyed man that had captured Raito's attention.

And that in itself was very difficult attain.

"Onii-chan! Are you even listening to me?" Sayu pulled her brother down to her level as Raito blinked in surprise, abruptly pulled from his thoughts for the second time that day. "I know you think I'm annoying, but ignoring me? That's just not acceptable. Don't make me start telling embarrassing stories about you in public just to get your attention!"

Raito sighed as Sayu narrowed her brown eyes in anger. "Hey Raito, remember that one time, in band camp-"

"Ok!" Raito exclaimed loudly as he grabbed the obnoxious (but cute) girl and hauled her forward. "Next up on the list, my wonderful, fabulous, extraordinary-"

"Raito…"

"Magnificent-"

"Raito…"

"Stupendous-"

"Raito!"

"Yes?" Raito smiled expectantly at his younger sister as a twitch developed in her right eye. "I get it, Leonardo. They're the epitome of awesome-ness and can do no wrong. Can I see them now, or are you going to continue to ramble on and on and on and on-"

"And here we are!" Sayu immediately closed her mouth as she blinked up at the pieces in front of her, but one in particular caught her attention…

"Raito… you didn't…"

A picture of their father smirking, dressed entirely in black while holding onto a scythe hiding cleverly within the shadows of the painting hung directly in front of them, as Sayu tried to swallow the lump that caught within her throat. "Raito, it's… it's…"

Raito prepared himself for the explosion that would come, certain that security would have to restrain the young girl from strangling the artist…

'Duck and cover, Raito, Duck and cover…'

"Raito…" Sayu began with her head down so Raito would not be able to see her eyes. "I…"

"Sayu, you have to understand, what dad is doing is-" Raito began trying to explain himself but-

"LOVE IT!" Sayu jumped up and threw herself at her brother, causing them both to tumble down; Sayu, laughing and Raito, screaming.

"What the hell?" Raito cried from the ground, his sister still on top of him. Sayu began to bounce on top of him, kind of creeping the 23 year old out. "It's creepy, and awesome, and terrifying, and… oh my God, Raito, Dad is going to murder you."

Raito sighed as he managed to push the girl off of him, dusting himself off as the other people in the gallery began whispering about the brother and sister. Raito rolled his eyes as he helped the younger girl up. "I don't care. The police are corrupt in his precinct, and he's doing nothing to stop that fact. For all we know, even he could be-"

"Raito." Sayu gave the boy a scrutinizing stare as she cut him off. "You know dad's not like that."

"Anybody can be easily corrupted, Sayu," Raito gazed at the girl, as innocence poured from her chocolate brown eyes. "if the resources of such power are available to them. Even the good willed can be manipulated by such influences. Always remember; the road to hell was paved with good intentions.

Sayu stayed quiet as she bit her lip and then stared at the other paintings. They were gorgeous, but nothing less was to be expected from her onii-chan. He was a master perfectionist at whatever he did, and didn't conform to being second best.

"These really are beautiful, Raito." Sayu smiled at the 23 year old from over her shoulder.

Raito smirked.

"Of course they are. Eat that, old college professor who didn't know what the hell he was talking about when he said my art was going to go nowhere."

"And what professor was that?"

"The one who I didn't give a damn about."

"Of course." Sayu rolled her eyes as Raito gazed at his own work. "Say, Raito? I didn't get to ask earlier, but who was the creepy looking guy you were ignoring me for?"

The bright-eyed brunette shrugged as he turned away from his sister. "I don't know, we just talked for a second."

"You were ignoring me for some closet pervert that you don't even know?!" Sayu exclaimed loudly.

Those whisper became full blown comments after that little outburst.

"Sayu!" Raito reprimanded harshly. "First of all, you don't know if a guy's a pervert just by looking at him!"

Sayu's dubious expression let Raito know that, yes, she did in fact know just by looking at him. "I hate to break it to you, Rai-chan, but that guy was staring at you as if he wanted to rape you on the middle of the floor."

Insert manic blush here.

Raito couldn't even speak after that comment, but sure as hell heard one of the patron's suddenly scream;

_"Oh my God, he's GAY?!"_

Today was just not a good day for Yagami Raito.

"Sayu, please." Raito did not plead with people very often, but for some strange reason, always ended up doing so with his crazy, loud-mouth sister. "If you love me at all, you will stop this progression of thought."

"But onii-chan, I'm just saying! If you're gonna swing the fence at least-"

"SAYU! I said STOP THAT TRAIN OF THOUGHT, DAMN IT!" Raito's Richter scale was going through the roof, and the next words that were said might officially break him. In fact, going psychotic on these people was starting to sound really good right now...

**_Raito's Check List for when he went Psycho:_**

**_1. Kill sister as brutally as possible. Possibly with a spork, if available._**

**_2. Start breaking random museum visitor's faces with bare hands._**

**_3. Burning all their bodies to ashes and giving them the finger repeatedly._**

**_4. Peeing on said visitor's remains while laughing maniacally._**

**_5. Streak out of gallery naked, while crying 'I'm free, I'm free! Look at me world, I'M FREEEEEEEEEE!'_**

Ahem. Personal desires aside.

Before Raito or Sayu could say anything else, a damning ring tone began to echo within the silent gallery's walls.

"_**You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true. I saw your face in a crowded place, And I don't know what to do, 'cause I'll never be with you."**_

Raito blinked. His cell phone was vibrating but… that song…

"Sayu… what the hell have you done with my cell phone."

The young girl smiled innocently as she twiddled her thumbs, looking quite smug if Raito didn't say so himself.

"I don't know what you're talking about Raito."

Innocent his ass.

"_**You're beautiful-"**_

"God damn it, hello!?"

"Err… is this a bad time?" Matsuda's voice crackled through the phone line as more people began to gawk at the young man.

_"I told you he was too hot to be straight. You know no straight guys have that ring tone on their phone."_

_"Mm. All the good looking one's are always taken or gay."_

_"Tell me about it."_

Raito officially hated everyone.

"No. But I'm guessing your going to talk anyway, so speak." Raito wasn't really in a good mood, but he knew beating up on Matsuda always made him feel better. Who didn't like picking on the village idiot?

Besides the idiot, of course.

"Well, it's about the new series that you've been working on… I need to meet up with you so we can solidify a new deal with Tokyo National. They say that they loved your work so much, that they want to incorporate more of it!" Raito grinned.

_"His boyfriend must have offered him some man-love sex… Look how cheesy he looks now!"_

Then Raito frowned.

"How about tomorrow at 3? We'll meet at the same cafe as always... oh, and Matsuda?"

"Yes, Yagami-kun?"

"Don't be late, or I will hurt you."

"Yes sir." Matsuda squeaked as Raito hung up the phone.

_"Oh! He's abusive! Did you hear that? He said he'd hurt his lover!"_

_"For shame!"_

_"Maybe he likes it rough like that?"_

_"Rawr."_

"And now it's time to leave!" Raito grabbed Sayu's hand as they rushed out of the museum, Raito not even stopping to look back. Sayu just grinned as she waved at the nosy people, giving them her one-of-a-kind, one finger salute.

The other patrons had not been amused.

* * *

Raito sighed as he strolled inside the dim lighted cafe, eyes carefully eyeing the tables available. Once Raito was sure his regular seat was vacated, he pushed his hands into his pockets and walked to his destination. Raito inspected the spot for cleanliness and nodded as it met his neat-freak standards and regally sat down.

Nobody sat down with more flourish than Yagami Raito, king of all that was primly.

A waitress came rushing to the table and blushingly asked if Raito needed anything. A charming smile and an order later brought him free coffee as the waitress left his table, sighing love-struck at the man...

Then tumbling on top of another waiter for not paying attention to where she was going.

'Idiot.' Raito thought without reservation.

As Raito took a sip of his coffee, black with no sugar, a voice interrupted his train of thought, eyes widening at the sound.

"So we meet again."

Raito turned his head to the side as familiar midnight black eyes hung with dark half circles stared intently into his own gaze. The same uniform of a long sleeved white shirt and baggy blue jeans hanging off the man's emaciated looking frame, making the 23-year-old wonder if the strange man had even changed his clothes the day before. Raito put his coffee down, not even glancing at the clock, awaiting Matsuda's arrival.

Raito suddenly had someone much more interesting to concentrate on.

If Raito only knew just what he was getting himself into by his next course of action...

"Hello there... would you like to sit down?"

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own James Blunt's "You're Beautiful" thank the gods above. If you love the song, oh well, if you feel its annoying... you're not alone. DX

XDXDXD Ha! I updated mad early, yo! Rejoice? Lol! I forgot to mention in the last chappie, for those who wanted to know, this is a **prequel **to my artist!au series in Che Sara, Sara! And yes, you shall still see them in that one-shot collection, along with the rest of the dysfunctional clan! XD I'm surprised, you guys really caught me off guard with all the reviews and alerts! Not that I'm complaining... not at all! Sqwee! Hope you enjoyed the chappie!


	3. Grasping at Severed Straws

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Three: _Grasping at Severed Straws_

* * *

Raito tilted his head to the side as the man that had managed to catch his undivided attention nodded once at the offer and proceeded to... sit down?

"Err..." Raito simply stared as the dark haired individual (definitely and individual in his own right) gleefully lifted his legs and balanced himself on the chair with just his bottom. Quite frankly, Raito had never seen anything like it. "Do you usually sit like that?"

Raito couldn't help but ask. Curiosity was a part of his deviant nature.

Said stranger gazed at him with unblinking eyes as he reached for one of the multiple sugar packets on the table. "Do **you** usually sit like that?"

Raito frowned at the man, mentally tallying the number of comebacks so far.

Some guy he didn't know: 1

Raito: 0

Fuck.

Raito said nothing more, carefully watching the mysterious, but captivating man as he ripped open the sugar packet he had pulled out of the bunch with two meticulous fingers. Raito's questioning gaze fell short as the other man quickly devoured the sugar without even hesitating.

Pure sugar...

In his throat...

WITHOUT HESITATING!

Raito shivered in disgust.

The moody artist did a mental re-count.

Some guy he didn't know: 2

Raito: 0

And that hadn't even been a come back. Raito was just freaked the hell out by it.

The other man simply smiled at Raito.

'Creepy smile, creepy smile, creepy smile, creepy smile!' Raito thought repeatedly.

He was actually interested in this guy? Maybe he had made a mistake. It was possible right? He couldn't pinpoint every personality he laid his eyes on.

'Psh. Yagami Raito make an error about someone? Are you serious' Raito mentally shook his head. 'Yeah, right. Bring those little pussy ass doubts somewhere else.'

Raito felt a lot better after that.

Yet, just as the young upcoming artist was about to go back to his coffee, the man surprised him once more, almost causing the boy to spill his precious caffeinated beverage over his lap.

"I saw your art display, yesterday while at the museum."

Insert creeped out look here.

Raito decided the blunt approach would work best here.

"How the hell did you know I have work on display?"

Attention be damned, he had a fucking stalker on his hands!

'Just what I need, the friendly neighborhood pervert vying for my love!' Raito thought sarcastically. 'Or my cold, dead body is more like it. God, how does Sayu know these things?!'

"Your sister mentioned it yesterday... and there aren't many artists with the name 'Raito' displaying their art at Tokyo National Museum." The man blinked at Raito as the 23 year old took in a deep breath.

'Well, I feel pretty stupid now.' Raito sighed inwardly, both glad that he didn't have another creep on his hands and interally berating himself for jumping to conclusions.

That was something Matsuda did, the idiot.

"Sorry about that. I only freaked out because it's not that uncommon for me to gain crazed fanatics." Raito cringed as a certain lawyer came to mind. "Believe it or not, I seem to attract stalkers, for some strange reason."

That creepy smile replayed itself on the other man's face.

"You don't say."

'Why do I feel so dirty when he stares at me like that?!' Raito shifted uncomfortably in his seat, refusing to shiver the way his body wanted to.

'_But if you didn't secretly like it_,' a voice whispered in the back of the auburn haired man's head, '_you wouldv'e told him to fuck off by now. There's something about this guy that gives you the feeling you'd be running back for **more**_.'

Raito chose to ignore that, digging it deeper in his mind's recesses.

"So, you know my name, even if not attained from me directly. Why not finally tell me yours?" Raito sipped his coffee as dark eyes trailed after the ascension of the cup while picking up his seventh sugar packet. "You may call me Ryuuzaki, Raito-kun. You don't mind if I call you Raito-kun, do you?"

Raito shook his head as he continued to stare at the man's mouth in horror.

Munch, munch, swallow.

"Now we are fully introduced to one another."

Munch, munch, swallow.

Raito's stomach suddenly felt very unsettled.

"Raito-kun looks a bit pale. Is he sick?" Mouth. Full. Of sugar. Oh...

Was some of it coming out of the side of his mouth...?

Urgh.

"Is everything alright here, sirs?" A completely different waiter than the one that had first served him appeared beside both Raito and Ryuuzaki, (the waitress from before having limped in the back) staring straight at the shaggy, dark haired man. His rumpled appearance and awkward sitting position obviously caught the man off guard, but not without consequences. Ryuuzaki stared blankly back at the man.

"Would you like anything, Ryuuzaki-san?" Raito ignored the waiter's obnoxious stare and looked expectantly at the raccoon eyed man, who was still staring intently at the waiter.

"Cake would be nice. Chocolate cake... with coffee." Ryuuzaki replied without even looking at Raito, his eyes widening just a fraction more.

The waiter began to break out into a sweat.

"Err... anything else, sir?" Ryuuzaki leaned forward and balanced himself with just the pads of his feet.

"... ... ... No thanks."

Raito sweat dropped as the waiter scurried away murmuring something about 'weird ass, bitchy pandas...'

"You sure do have a way with people." Raito commented off handedly. Ryuuzaki blinked as he shifted his black eyes to the chestnut haired man across from him.

"He wished to stare," Ryuuzaki explained, " so I was simply giving him a better look. I was only trying to be polite."

Yeah, as polite as a white politician looking for a new hooker to screw.

Raito took one last sip of his vanishing coffee as the waiter quickly returned back with both Ryuuzaki's cake and coffee. The prideful man nearly sputtered out the rest of his drink as Ryuuzaki immediately grabbed the creamer and poured liberal into his own coffee. Then, after his coffee was a milky white, he began plucking more sugar packets and one by one, added them to his already completely saturated beverage.

Oh God.

One...

Two...

"Raito-kun," Rip. Tilt. Pour. "I must confess something to you, before anything else is said. Please listen, for I would rather you did not take what I say lightly."

Seven...

Eight...

Nine-Ten...

"Yes, Ryuuzaki-san?" Raito politely replied as the sugar count continued to rise. This man had no self control whatsoever.

Fifteen...

"I have not been able to stop thinking about Raito-kun since we spoke the day before." Ryuuzaki put down his 22nd sugar packet and gazed at the broody artist.

Raito pretended he didn't feel the blush heating up his face.

"I... I haven't been able to either, Ryuuzaki-san." Obsidian eyes blinked as surprise overcame the other's features. "I can honestly say that I've never met anyone like you, Ryuuzaki-san."

Oh, that was an understatement.

Ryuuzaki hid his smirk behind his tea cup as he brought it to his lips and took a sip without even shuddering at the saccharinely sweet taste. The man then took his fork between two meticulous fingers and took a gigantic bite of his double-decker chocolate cake.

Yay! Diabetes for everybody!

Raito almost laughed at the man, ready to ask the inevitable question, when the vibration prepared him for the worst. The young man tried to grab for his cell phone before it could begin to play but-

_**"Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? Don't cha..." **_

Ryuuzaki's fork dropped, his eyes widening even further than humanely possible.

_**"Don't cha, ya baby? Don't cha..." **_

Raito closed his eyes and silently counted from 10.

_**"Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me? Don't cha..." **_

Random customers glanced away awkwardly as Raito grabbed the vibrating cell phone from his pocket and snapped it open, trying to ignore the eery smirk that had invaded Ryuuzaki's mouth.

Those were not bedroom eyes he was staring at him with either, damn it.

'Sayu...' Raito thought perversely, 'I will annihilate you."

"Hello?"

"Yagami-kun! I'm so sorry I'm late!"

Raito blinked as he turned his head to look at the clock, finally noticing that the other man was (once again) 25 minutes late.

'Well, holy fucking mother of cow.'

Raito hadn't even noticed.

"It's alright, Matsuda." Raito was in no hurry to end this... date? "Take your time."

"Don't worry, Yagami-kun, I'll - wait. Did you just say... take my time?"

Raito sighed. "Yeah."

Deathly silence.

"Do I... have the wrong number?" A vein spontaneously popped on the artist's forehead.

"Matsuda, stop being a moron and get your useless ass here, already." Raito had only so much patience.

Click.

Did Raito mention how much he hated everyone?

Well... he did.

"Pussycat Dolls, huh?" Raito's eye twitched. "That's not... my sister, I don't know how she does it, but-"

"It's alright, Raito-kun." Ryuuzaki commented with a straight face. "I understand."

Raito sighed in relief, until he heard the former begin to hum.

"Hm, hm... freak like me..."

Raito's eye twitched once again.

"Bastard."

Ryuuzaki smirked in triumph.

Ryuuzaki (grr.): 3

Raito: 0

God damn it.

"So I suppose I should be going now. It appears as if the person you were awaiting should be arriving shortly." Raito stalled as the words exited the mysterious man's mouth. A strange sensation over came him, as Raito realized what had caught him off guard.

Raito didn't want him to leave.

The words left the 23 year old's mouth before he could stop them.

"We should meet up again."

Ryuuzaki froze.

Raito watched in anticipation.

They both stared at each other for a couple of seconds. This was it, the moment they had both been waiting for (one more so than the other, but still).

Without a word, Ryuuzaki pulled out his cell phone and gazed unblinkingly at Raito. For once in his life, Raito didn't even hesitate to take out his as well.

After both numbers had been recorded, the older of the two began to get up, preparing himself to leave when all of a sudden Matsuda finally came tumbling to the table. "Yagami-kun! I'm so sorry, I-Oh!" Matsuda banged his knee on the edge of the table as he pointedly stared at the other man there. Matsuda's eyes roamed back to Raito and then back to Ryuuzaki. "Am I... interrupting something?"

Both men still had their cell phones out.

"Yes," Ryuuzaki stated vacantly. "You are interrupting my daily psychotic episode."

Wide, wide eyes stared at the scrawny looking figure...

Matsuda looked like he was in shock.

"Would you like to participate?" L whispered eerily to the not-always-there manager.

"Meep."

'"OK! How about we talk later, Ryuuzaki? Maybe... go out some other time for some coffee?"

The real unspoken question lay lurking in between the lines. Would Ryuuzaki see what he was really asking? Or better yet...

"Of course. I will be awaiting Raito-kun's call."

If he did, would Raito be able to see the answer?

Ryuuzaki finally got up all the way from his chair, standing in his signature hunched over position. Raito smiled as the man nodded his head and lazily turned around, leaving the cafe without another word. Honey colored eyes followed the retreating figure, not even noticing Matsuda sitting down in the now empty seat.

A sing-songy voice broke the comfortable silence. "**_Secret lovers..._**"

Raito said nothing as he proceeded to give Matsuda his most evil of glares: Silent Death Glare of Doom!

"Meep, Meep." Matsuda looked ready to pee his pants in fear.

That's what Raito thought.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own "Don't Cha" by the Pussy Cat Dolls (Thanks Kagome-chanLP for the idea! XD) Nor do I own "Secret Lovers" by Atlantic Starr. ((barfs)) Yes, Matsuda would like that kind of sappy, crappy music.

((dies from speed of updating))

Omg... what the hell am I doing? Why can't I stop writing?! Oh, I hope this chapter wasn't a big boring mess. ((Hopes your guys don't hate it))


	4. In the Long Run

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Four: _In the Long Run _

* * *

There were many ways Raito liked to spend his free time in days such as this. Working on his latest art, cozying up on bed with one of his precious Murder/Mystery novels, torturing his little sister, hell, even just watching regular old T.V. like a lot of the mindless masses around the world enjoyed doing from time to time.

However...

"Yagami-kun?"

Being in Matsuda's presence for any amount of time in the duration of said day was not one of them.

Raito sighed once more, quite sure no one on this Earth was as annoying as his good-intentioned (yet still goofy) manager.

"Yes, Matsuda?"

"... ... ... Nothing."

A heavy silence hung in between the two men as Matsuda continued to stare at anything that wasn't Raito. The tense atmosphere began eating at Raito's nerves as Matsuda began to annoyingly drum his fingers on top of the table.

This was not what Raito came here for.

"Matsuda, either speak now or be ready to face my fists of fury pain." Raito snarled. The man was passing 'tolerably annoying' on the Yagami Raito's Scale of Annoyance and jumping up to 'So fucking irritating, I want to kill you!'

Said Scale Levels on **Yagami Raito's Scale of Annoyance**:

**1. Passively Irritating...**

**2. Tolerably Annoying...**

**3. Getting On Raito's Last Nerve...**

**4. Shut the Hell Up Before Raito Hurts You!**

**And finally: 5. So Fucking Irritating, I Want to Kill You!**

And the poor man hadn't barely spoken anything but his name, yet!

This did not bode well for future conversation.

"Of-of course, Yagami-kun. I ap-apologize." Matsuda slightly stuttered. Raito nodded as the man across from him finally began to make actual words.

'Why did I pick him for a manager, again?' Raito thought silently.

'Because he's cheap?'

Oh... right.

Matsuda cleared his throat again as he sat back on the chair. "The reason I called you about the deal is Tokyo National wants to set up another spot in their next exhibit _exclusively _for your work, Yagami-kun. There is, however, one condition to this."

Matsuda hesitated as Raito leaned forward in his own seat. "Which is...?"

"They want to buy your, err, 'portrait' of your father. The art director says everyone has simply been captivated by it so far, constantly asking about the person who painted it." Raito's eyes widened as Matsuda nodded solemnly. "Yagami-kun has apparently created a masterpiece."

"How much are they offering for it?" Raito quieried.

Matsuda once again paused.

Oh, hot damn.

Matsuda mumbled a number that Raito's own ears could not wrap around.

"Did you just say...?"

Matsuda simply nodded.

Thump.

CRASH!

Raito's ass, meet the floor. Floor, meet Raito's ass.

Nice to meet you. And what a fine ass you are.

Why, thank you.

"Are you serious?!"

Matsuda sweat dropped as he rushed to help the grumpy artist up from off the ground. Raito pushed away his attempts and grabbed his manager by the shoulders and roughly shook the idiotic man. "Are you sure? Did you mishear?! Matsuda, I will kick your ass 10 times over if you're lying to me!"

The customers stared in silence as they watched the nearly hysterical 23-year-old, still practically kneeling on the ground, clutch his manager's shoulders tightly.

Talk about awkward...

"No, I swear!" Raito finally let go of the other man's body and got to his feet, dusting himself off without a second thought. He tried not to notice the other people looking at him weirdly.

No, Raito's face was not red because he was embarrassed... he was just that hot.

Literally and figuratively.

Hair flip, then pose for a moment.

That's better.

The two men sat back down as Raito regained his lost composure. Matsuda timidly glanced up at the manic chestnut-haired man, wondering what the hell he would do next.

Matsuda had never known someone to have as many mood swings as Yagami Raito.

"Tell them I'll think about it." Raito stated as regally as possible.

"Of course, Yagami-kun." Male PMS, maybe? Matsuda didn't think he would ever know...

And quite frankly, he didn't think he wanted to.

"So, Yagami-kun..." Matsuda treaded lightly, knowing his next words could either incur Raito's violent wrath or just agitate him to no end until he fired the slightly older man.

Sadly, the second option was the more appealing of the two.

Raito raised his eyebrow as Matsuda began playing with the eating utensils that still lay on the table. The fork clattered on the surface with a noticeable 'clang.'

"That man that was here earlier..."

"Yes, Matsuda?" Raito's face became blank as the manager began to feel a cold sweat run down the back of his neck.

"One of your friends?"

Raito's eye suddenly twitched.

Not a good sign.

"Why do you care to know?"

Eye twitch.

"Ah- well, he just didn't seem like the kind of guy... you normally... hang out with?" How the hell did that end up becoming a question, Matsuda wondered.

Though the glare on Raito's face answered that question quite easily enough.

'Focus, Touta, focus! He WANTS you to quiver in fear... with that malicious... deadly... glare...'

Raito was quite the winner when it came to the "Scare the shit out of Matsuda!" game. He usually won without much effort. The dark-haired oblivious manager was too much of a fluff ball to actually stand a fighting chance.

And that was putting it lightly.

"I usually don't 'hang out' with anyone Matsuda." The unspoken 'Because you're all idiots' flew right over the imbecile's head as Matsuda suddenly grinned.

"That's my point, Yagami-kun. You're usually so reclusive!" Ooh... Matsuda knew a big word!

Raito almost felt like patting him on the head and giving him a cookie.

"I mean, I never see you go out with anybody... especially with the ladies, except for your sister..." Matsuda trailed off.

Eye twitch... returning... with a vengeance...

"And what are you trying to imply with that, Matsuda?" Raito's even voice held a deadly amount of venom, but Matsuda obliviously continued on with his train of thought.

"Well, it just seems strange, is all. You never really interact with people unless they're praising you for your work, and the first time I actually ever see you with someone who doesn't look like either a fan or a local merchant, it's with a strange looking guy who appears to not only want to rape you with his eyes, but have your cell phone number as well."

Rape. With. Eyes.

Yes, Matsuda would think something like that out loud, while other people were listening in...

The manager cut himself off as he watched Raito close his mahogany eyes.

The twitch then moved to his eyebrow.

"Matsuda."

"I've always suspected..." Matsuda grinned in excitement. "It's ok, Yagami-kun. Coming out of the closet takes time-"

"I can't 'come out' when I was never _in_ the closet, you moron!"

"I respect that you may not want people to know-"

"Know? What do they need to know? And if I didn't _want_ people to know, why are saying this all out loud?!"

"But Yagami-kun, you know you can definitely trust me."

Head slam.

Raito's head slamming onto the table, that is.

"Take myself, for example." Matsuda was on a roll, today. "I came out a couple years ago, and now I'm as happy as can be-"

"Alright! Alright! I'm gay! Is that what you want to hear?!" Raito exclaimed hysterically as he stood up from where he was sitting and turned towards the gawking customers of the small cafe and began waving his arms in the air. The past couple of days finally wearing the poor man down, as the assumptions of his sexuality finally lay to rest. "I. Am. Gay. I screw guys! Or better yet, I let guys screw me! Are all you people satisfied now? May I please be left in peace?"

The cafe became deathly quiet as one woman fainted from shock and all the men in the vicinity simply blinked stupidly. One man's piece of slightly regurgitated food fell from his parted lips as everyone's mouths hung open simultaneously. A waitress accidentally spilled coffee into someone's lap while re-filling their cup, but neither noticed the hot liquid still continuing to pour from the crystal coffee pot.

Everyone just stared wide-eyed at the young man as Raito finally calmed slightly.

"See, was that so hard, Yagami-kun?"

Only Matsuda...

Before Raito could jump over the table and strangle the life out of his manager, Raito took in a deep breath and managed to barely restrain himself.

Barely.

Matsuda's death would come another day. He was mortified enough as it was, and adding a trip to the police station to that would only add insult to injury.

"I... am leaving. Because if I stay here one more moment, I will most likely hurt you beyond recognition and be imprisoned for who know's how long-"

"And become someone's man-bitch?"

"MATSUDA. YOU ARE PUSHING. DON'T PUSH."

"Sorry." The dark-haired male meekly responded.

Raito laid his money on the table and began to leave the establishment with as much dignity as he could muster. It wasn't very much, but that wasn't the point.

Raito still had at least a portion of his pride.

"When should I call you?" Matsuda stupidly called out.

Chocolate eyes narrowed as the artist's eyebrow twitched one last time. "I would prefer never again. But, I suppose you'll call me tomorrow for the simple fact that you're a buffoon, and I am, unfortunately, said client of aforementioned buffoon."

"Tomorrow it is!" Matsuda cheerfully exclaimed, still sitting at the table waving at Raito's back. "And say hi to your 'friend' for me!"

Raito would have smacked himself in the forehead if he wasn't so damn good-looking. God, what a fucking moron.

Raito finally reached the door and pushed it open, ignoring the still burning stares aimed at Raito's person.

"_**My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard; and they're like, 'it's better than yours!' Damn right, it's better than yours! I can teach you, but I have to charge!"**_

CRASH!

The coffee pot was no longer a problem.

"..." Silence.

O.O

"..." Awkward, awkward silence.

O.O

_**"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard-"**_

Snap.

"Sayu." Raito began as he slammed the door shut and accepted the phone call. "I hate you."

Tinkering laughter was Sayu's only response for a couple of minutes as Raito's angry voice spoke volumes of what could have possibly happened.

"Where were you this time?" The excitable girl asked. "Did you enjoy your daily dose of sugary sweetness, my bootylicious milk-shaker?"

Raito swore he was going to have high-blood pressure by the time he reached 25.

"At some cafe declaring my homosexuality to the world."

"... ... ... Say what now?"

"Admitting my complete gayness to complete strangers. Now, did I mention how much I want to kill you yet? Because I do. How many times do I have to tell you stop messing with my damn cell phone already, Sayu?" Now, it wasn't very often that Raito caught his younger and much more immature sister off guard, but in this case he would take what he could get... even at his own expense.

A couple more seconds of lovely, lovely silence later...

Ah, what a beautiful sound.

"Screw the cell phone! You outed yourself... and I wasn't there?!"

"Nope."

More revered silence.

"Fucking bullshit!" Sayu swore loudly.

"Now Sayu-chan. Temper, temper." Oh, his day was beginning to look up again. What was he so angry about before?

"Did Matsuda at least record it for me?"

"... ... ..."

Raito didn't know whether he should be uncomfortable about the the fact that Sayu actually felt that Matsuda should have taken that in to account at the time.

Sigh. "I didn't think so. Freaking idiot."

Ah, both he and his sister held the same sentiments, even if for different reasons.

Whatever. An alliance was an alliance.

"Now, what did you call me for, Sayu? What is it this time?"

It wasn't really a question, but a fact; Sayu only called him when she wanted something.

"I need to talk to you onii-chan." Raito blinked as Sayu straightforwardly responded to her brother's statement, her voice suddenly changing tones. "It's important."

That solemn voice... Sayu did not just use that voice for any occasion.

This was serious.

"Where do you want to meet?" Raito questioned.

"I'll meet you at your apartment tomorrow night. I'd go today, but I have to go to class. I just needed to make sure you'd be free."

Raito did not even hesitate. "Yeah, I'll be there. Whatever time, I'll be waiting for you."

There was more silence, but this one was not as amiable as the last.

"I'll see you tomorrow, onii-chan."

Click.

Raito pulled the cell phone away from his ear and stared questioningly down at the device.

What the hell was going on?

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Milkshake" by Kelis. But I could use one right now. Mmmm... milkshakes...

Lmao, I sense tension. And look! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's... Raito coming out of the closet in public? Oh dear... Matsuda, you have broken our dear Rai-chan. Shame on you. XD


	5. Dissonance Within Factions

Title: **_Discordant Harmony_**

Chapter Five: _Dissonance Within Factions_

* * *

L was not a patient man, nor did he pretend to be.

As much as most people who actually knew the eccentric artist hated it, L was a man who was all about instant gratification. He wanted things to be done his way, in the quickest method possible; nothing less was acceptable.

This was most likely why by the second day of having met Yagami Raito at the cafe, he decided to grab his own cell phone and call the young man. At this point, it didn't matter to him whether Raito's true intentions were to call him or not. He was making his move.

Consequences be damned.

* * *

_**"'Cause This Is Thriller, Thriller Night! And No One's Gonna Save You From The Beast About to Strike-"**_

"GAH!"

_**"You Know It's Thriller, Thriller Night! You're Fighting For Your Life Inside A Killer, Thriller; Tonight!"  
**_

CRASH!

"Fucking shit in a hole!"

Raito's day was obviously not going as planned.

Between the call from Matsuda he had received earlier (which in itself had put him in a shitty mood) and having to deal with grouchy, old farts that like to call themselves art merchants, Raito felt like he was ready to implode in himself.

To put it simply, his day was going down to Hell in a hand basket, and listening to old 1980's Michael Jackson songs off his cell phone (a.k.a the electronical spawn of Satan) that his little sister (a.k.a the actual spawn of Satan) herself programmed for kicks was not helping him one bit.

Raito collected himself from off the floor of his kitchen, where he'd been previously washing dishes, and limped his way to the phone that lay innocently vibrating on his table.

'Better not be Matsuda again, cause I swear-'

"Hello?"

"... Raito-kun?"

Raito almost dropped the phone in shock as the familiar monotone voice filled his ears.

"Err... hi?"

"Hello."

Raito sweat dropped.

"Hadn't we established that I would be the one to call you, Ryuuzaki-san?"

"Yes, but I got bored... and grew tired of waiting."

"We just saw each other yesterday!"

"And?"

Raito really had no response for that.

"What is Raito-kun doing?"

"Err... Washing dishes."

"Does Raito-kun have any plans for later on today?"

"Well," Raito thought back on his little sister's phone call from yesterday, and her confirming a time earlier on in the day. "I am meeting up with my sister at around five o'clock."

Raito glanced at the digital clock on his microwave, quickly reading the time.

4:38 p.m.

"But other than that, no. I'm pretty much free."

Insert subtle baiting move no. 957 here.

Just to see what the guy would say, of course.

"Then I would like to take Raito-kun out for dinner. Does he agree to this?"

Raito almost dropped the phone again in surprise. Damn, this guy really was as blunt as he looked.

No two ways about that fact.

"Ye-yeah, sure... I guess? Uh... where do you wanna go?"

Yes, because at this moment, you could definitely see the charismatic 23-year-old at his vocal best.

'_Lovely stutters, Sexy Man_.'

'Even my own self is against me!' Raito thought disgruntledly to himself.

'_Damn straight_.'

Hmph.

"How about dinner at Il Ghiottone?"

CRASH!

... ... Again.

Now if Raito was suspicious of this man's intentions before, he definitely was now.

'Why do I suddenly feel like a chick who finally received a call from that 'oh-so-special guy' she met at the bar the night before?'

"As friends, of course." Raito tacked on, quite sure that if anyone was going to clear the airwaves on this, it would have to be him.

It was time to test this guy out.

Raito continued to wait for a reply, until finally...

"Of course."

Because that didn't sound disappointed at all.

Oh, Raito was gonna have fun with this one.

"So do you want to meet up there, or-"

"No." Ryuuzaki cut the man right off the bat. "I'll pick Raito-kun up. If Raito-kun would please give me his address, I shall be able to pick him up at his home at precisely 7 p.m."

Raito gave the mysterious eccentric a mental round of applause... until a thought came to mind.

"Don't you need reservations in advance to go to Il Ghiottone?"

"Yes, but I happen to know someone who owes me a favor that works there, so it is all taken care of. Now, your address?"

'Taken care of? In such short notice?' Raito thought suspiciously to himself. 'Because if that doesn't put me on edge, I don't know what else will.'

Raito quickly shook his head and rattled off his address to the other man.

He could almost **feel **the creepy grin on Ryuuzaki's face after that.

"I guess I'll see you later, then? My sister should be here any minute..." Raito heard Ryuuzaki sigh absently on the phone and smiled appreciatively.

"I suppose I will have to simply satisfy myself with Raito-kun's company later on this evening."

Another sigh.

"Until later on, Raito-kun?"

"Of course, Ryuuzaki-san. Until later on."

Click.

Ok.

This was not a date. This was not a date. This was not a date. This was not... a...

Oh, fuck.

Raito blushed a vibrant crimson. This was most definitely a date; Ryuuzaki wasn't exactly being subtle about his intentions.

'I've just agreed to go on a date with an interesting, but very strange man with gross eating tendencies to a very public restaurant.'

Oh, double fuck.

After Raito got over his own shock and finally finished his dishes (not that there were many to begin with), the moody artist glanced at the time once again and frowned.

5:09 p.m.

Sayu was not one to be late... ever.

Especially if it introduced an oppotunity to somehow either gain dirty information on her brother, or taunt him with information that she already knew.

Raito opened his cell phone once more and clicked on the girl's name. After a couple of rings, a breathless voice finally answered.

"I am SO sorry, onii-chan, I should be coming up right now! In fact, I'm right at the door, so-"

BUMP! BUMP! BUMP!

"Let me in."

Raito rolled his eyes as he opened the door and prepared himself for an ambush.

He wasn't disappointed.

"ONII-CHAN!"

Glomp!

"Damn it, Sayu!"

How the hell did his ass always end up on the damn floor?

"Can you get off me now, Xena, Warrior Princess?" Raito poked the 19-year-old in the forehead as her grip on her brother loosened. Sayu stuck her tongue out at the chocolate eyed man and jumped off him without much effort.

Raito could only blink at the feat.

"What are you, a gymnast now?" Raito asked smartly.

"Do you think that'll get me more boyfriends? I hear the guys like flexible chicks."

Raito's glare was the only response Sayu received.

"Guess not."

The disgruntled artist finally got up from the floor and brushed himself off, leading them both into the living room.

"So how's my favoritest big brother on the planet? Scored any hot guys I should know about?" Sayu's grin turned down right malicious as she flopped down on the leather love seat. "Or how about any creepy, pervy men? I hear that's more your style now."

"When the hell did Matsuda call you?" Raito exclaimed with fright. If his sister knew about yesterday...

"Oh, Matsuda didn't call **me**," Sayu sang out, "but you didn't think I'd actually just sit back and forget about your little 'adventure' yesterday, did you? Matsuda was only too happy to give me more than enough details..."

The sepia-haired girl leaned forward a bit. "And what details they were."

Raito's face imitating a cherry was flawless.

"Well, that's not what you came over here to discuss, now is it?" At the mention of why she was actually at her brother's apartment, Sayu sobered a bit, her face losing a bit of its pretty shine.

"About that..." Raito really was preparing himself for the worst. "Raito, you remember that painting of dad that you showed me at the last exhibit in Tokyo National a few days ago?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Err... remember how I said dad was going to kill you once he found out?"

Remember those fucks from before? Let's quadruple those, shall we?

"Yeah..."

Sayu's face became very pale, very fast. "I think you should go into hiding now, Raito."

Plop.

That was the sound of Raito shitting his pants.

"Are you... how did he find out?!" Raito exclaimed.

Sayu winced at the sound.

"One of his colleague's wives saw the exhibit... and saw the painting... and saw your name... and oh so nicely informed dad about said painting..." Sayu paused for a moment. "But, that's not all."

Raito's eyes widened as Sayu cringed at the uncomfortable stare. Oh, her brother was going to want to kill her for this.

More so than usual, anyways.

"They also happened to hear certain... 'rumors' about the artist."

Raito's hand spasmed.

And... that was the cue to start preparing to run like hell. Why the hell was she still here?

"What **kind** of rumors, _**Sayu-chan**_?" Jaw clench. Eye twitch. Nostrils flare.

"... ... ... ... ... Um..."

"Sayu."

"They'resayingyourgayandthatyouhavealoveryou'reabusivetowardsandmostlikelyparticipateinmassivegayorgies." Sayu let out a breath as she rushed out all the words at once and ducked for cover over the couch.

Raito stayed silent for a moment, his face as blank as can be.

"Err... Raito?"

Still nothing.

"Raito, are you ok?" Sayu tried once more.

"Did you just say... that they think I'm an abusive gay man?"

"Yeah..."

"And... that I participate in orgies?"

"Yup."

"Huh."

More silence.

"Raito?"

"Yes, Sayu?"

"Should I be running away right now?" Sayu questioned cautiously in all seriousness.

Whether it be from Sayu's last comment, or the ridiculousness of the whole situation, he didn't know. But one thing was for certain, Raito was most definitely losing it. The man's eyes began to water as his hands once again clenched together, his face turning an interesting shade of red. And that's when Raito did something completely unexpected.

It started as a giggle, but gradually escalated in seconds, bordering quickly on hysterical fits of laughter.

Sayu was officially creeped the fuck out.

"Onii-chan?"

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

It was official, her brother was insane.

She wondered if they'd let her have his laptop when he was taken away by the men in white jackets...

Raito started coughing, trying to breathe through the barrage of on-going laughter. Sayu cautiously walked over to him and began to gently pat him on the back. The man grinned as the coughing fit subsided and grabbed the girl's hand to pull her closer to him on the couch. "If I haven't killed you yet for the things you've done, Sayu, I can honestly say that you're safe for now."

"But-"

"To tell you the truth, this situation saves me a lot of trouble in the long run."

"Wh-"

"Dad always knew, but refused to acknowledge it. Both of us know that. I've never really tried to hide my sexuality."

"Ye-"

"I would've preferred he didn't think I was abusive, but those orgies sure do sound interest-"

"RAITO!"

Raito grinned at the young girl and ruffled his little sister's hair. He ignored her look of disdain at the gesture, delighting in her annoyance.

"I'm not ashamed, Sayu. And even if he's mad about the painting, which in itself is the more frightening of the two angers, I wouldn't put it down for all the "righteous fury" he's got to offer." Sayu stared up at Raito with wide eyes. It was in time like these that he realized just how young and innocent the girl truly was at heart.

All annoyances aside.

"He's got his own beliefs and I've got mine. Nothing is going to change that; whether it be now, or later." Raito let go of his little sister's hand began to pull back. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a not-quite-a-date to get ready for."

Ah, there was that crazy gleam Raito had missed in her eyes.

Not that he would ever tell her that.

"Raito's got a date... that's not quite a date? Hm... wonder who's the lucky fellow?" Sayu smirked.

"Whoever you want it to be... now, are you going to help me get ready, or not?" Sayu nodded as both of them got up.

"I need to go use the bathroom first, though. Do you mind?" Raito shrugged, allowing the girl passage.

Too bad he didn't notice the cell phone she had snuck out of his pocket while they were standing up or the villainous smirk she wore on her face while walking away.

Poor fool.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the above: "Thriller" by Michael Jackson (Just for you, Twisted Artistic Genius! Lol!), Tokyo National Museum, which obviously is not a made up museum (forgot to mention that last time!), or Il Ghiottone, which is also an actual restaurant in Japan. I don't know if you need reservations for it, though, but I'm assuming you do. Once again bullshitting my way out of every situation in this story.

Another chapter finished. Sorry if I don't respond to all your reviews! I'm trying though. I swear I am! Lol! Stay tuned for the next chapter! XD


	6. Water Under the Bridge

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Six: _Water Under the Bridge_

* * *

"You sure took your sweet time in the bathroom, Sayu." Raito smartly commented as his little sister strolled contently into the room. She glared at her smart-ass brother, hands positioning themselves on her hips.

"Would you like a play-by-play of what I was doing, Mr. McNose-a-lot?"

A disgusted face contorted itself onto Raito's handsome face. "… … Ew. I think I'll pass thanks."

Sayu smirked contentedly and reached over with her left hand. "Good boy."

Pat, pat.

"Damn it, stop petting me on the fucking head, Sayu! I'm not a damn dog!" Raito ripped the girl's hand away from his impeccably perfect auburn hair and snarled angrily. Sayu giggled in delight, only cementing her demonic status in Raito's eyes.

Not that it needed much cementing, but still.

She was evil.

Honey-colored eyes turned their attention back towards the open walk-in closet situated in Raito's bedroom, the colors popping out almost immediately to one's vision.

What? Didn't everyone have perfectly organized color-coordinated walk-in closets?

'Well, they should." Raito thought snootily as he tossed his hair back majestically and grandly walked inside, turning his attention towards the clothes within the open closet shining with untamed brilliance.

Sayu rolled her eyes.

'Because that doesn't make you think of the word 'pansy' at all, dear brother.' Sayu thought amusingly to herself. 'He acts more like a girl than I do!'

Her brother really was 'flaming' in every sense of the word.

"What do you think of this shirt compared to this shirt?" Raito's voice cut into what Sayu liked to call her 'Raito's-such-a-girly-man' time, as she blinked in surprise.

"Rai-chan…" Sayu began exasperatedly. "They're the same shirt."

"No they're not."

"Yes, they are."

"Nu uh."

"Uh huh."

"Sayu, you're talking to an actual artist, alright. I think I would know if they're the same shirt."

"Really? Than why are they, not only the same style, but the same color, Mr. Van Gough?" Raito was beginning to piss her off with his little 'know it all' lines. The man refused to even acknowledge he _could_ be wrong, let alone actually being it.

"They are not. This is one is burgundy. The other is maroon."

Sayu looked over at her brother as if he was an idiot.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just official." Raito looked over at his sister suspiciously, still grasping on to the hangers that held the aforementioned shirts. "What is?"

"You're idiot status. You are now only slightly above Matsuda. Good job, Einstein. You should be proud." Sayu smirked at her older brother as a vein popped on his forehead.

The Eye Twitch of Doom once again returned.

How did all these people manage to piss him off so badly?!

Raito stomped back into the closet, hoping that his anger would be curved by the murderous fantasies floating in his head…

"I'm guessing that's a no-go for either shirt then?"

BANG!

The closet door shut with enough force to bring the apartment down.

"Guess so."

Sayu giggled once more, pulling the familiar cell phone out of her pocket once Raito was out of sight and daintily placing it on the bureau beside Raito's bed.

Good thing Raito didn't notice that small detail when he entered the closet.

* * *

Fifteen shirts and fourteen criticisms later, Raito finally stepped out of his room wearing a pair of slick, black pants and a cream colored long sleeve collar shirt. Tucked in, of course.

"Oh… look at the sexy man finally ready to go get lai-"

"Sayu!"

Raito's now crimson face shone brightly as Sayu grinned in glee. The 19-year-old college student turned to look at the clock that was mounted up against the wall, the time reading 6:45 p.m. "Jeez, Raito, you take longer to get ready than I do." Raito smirked as he casually walked to the young girl.

"You can't expect perfection to come naturally, little sister. Besides, all of this-" Raito did a small dramatic twirl, "is always worth waiting for."

Sayu crossed her arms.

"Yeah… hey, Rai-chan? You're ego is showing, and it doesn't look as gorgeous as the rest of you does." Sayu stuck out her tongue at the man, ready to kick him in the shins.

Raito really needed to get off his damn high horse.

'Or,' Sayu thought mischievously, 'it needs to get off him!'

Sayu burst out laughing, catching her brother by surprise.

"Wha…?"

"No-nothing… hahahahahaha…" Sayu's laughing spree continued on for a good minute in a half before she was finally able to calm herself down.

'Ok… all gay, uke jokes aside…'

"Are you finished?" Raito asked, his aggravation at the young girl not hidden at all. Sayu said nothing as she simply flopped down on the couch and crossed her legs, very similar to the manner that her brother sat.

"Yup. Now, what are you guys gonna talk about?" Raito sighed as he sat down on the other side of the couch, much more well mannered than his sister, and brushed back his bangs with his fingers. "I don't know… he just seems so interesting, though. I've never met anyone like him, and that attracts me **to** him, for some strange reason I can't fathom."

Sayu leaned over to her brother, laying her head on the edge of his shoulder. "Maybe you're just sick of being put on a pedestal all the time. Heh, for some weird reason, people actually think you're as perfect as you act."

Raito rolled his eyes.

"Sayu, I am as perfect as I act. No question there."

The doubtful expression on Sayu's face said otherwise.

"Yeah, sure you are. Whatever you say, onii-chan." Sayu picked her head up and smiled at the man. "But one thing's for certain…"

Sayu's smile suddenly turned deadly.

"This guy has to meet the qualifications set by myself in order to pursue my er… lovely older brother."

Raito sweat dropped.

"Sayu… your qualifications include just being 'hot' and if the guy doesn't look like a toddler."

"Silence! It must be done!"

Oh, if only there was something to slam his head into… maybe he'd be knocked out by the time Ryuuzaki got here.

And speaking of which…

Tap, tap, tap.

"Sqwee!" Sayu nearly jumped ten feet in the air (once again having Raito stare at her from such a feat) as she ran to the door in glee. She ripped the door open and grinned, not even hesitating in pulling Ryuuzaki inside.

The poor man looked as confused as Raito normally felt when around Sayu.

O.O

Yeah, that was a good way of putting it.

"Hi! I'm Yagami Sayu, but I'm sure you remember me from the other day at the museum! You have to sit down, there's so much to talk about!"

Oh, the cringe passing through his body as he stood up was nothing to laugh about.

Raito stood up elegantly as he smiled at the other man. Ryuuzaki's eyes seemingly lit up as Sayu pulled him into the living room and sat him down on the couch. "So you wanna bang my brother?"

Ryuuzaki blinked as Raito's face once again turned an impossible shade of red.

"Sayu!"

"I'm just saying, we need to get this all out on the table… besides, wouldn't you like to know?" Sayu asked with an air of false innocence. And it was at that moment that Ryuuzaki clumsily grinned back at his sister that Raito realized what had just occurred.

An unholy alliance had just been formed.

'Dear Sweet Mother of all that is good in this world, I am officially screwed up the ass.'

'_Literally, if he has his way about it.'_

'God damn it, shut the fuck up!'

Raito was beginning to really hate himself, and that was a strange pill to swallow. He wondered if there was a way to shut his own self up…

'_Because that isn't psycho talk at all…'_

'Grr…'

"Raito-kun is very attractive…" Ryuuzaki brought a thumb up to his lips as he tilted his head towards the said attractive man and glanced at him from the corner of his eye. "I'm sure he would be just delightful in-"

"Yeah, that sentence? Really doesn't need to be finished. Ever." Raito sat down on his love seat, which was the farthest he could get from the terrible twosome, as Sayu and Ryuuzaki turned their stares at him predatorily. "It's quite alright, Raito-kun…"

The pause burned within Raito's ears.

"I'm sure I won't need to."

'Dirty smile, dirty thoughts, dirty smile, dirty thoughts… and is he getting up?! Why is he getting up?! You can sit back down, Mister, I don't need any-'

Ryuuzaki sat down closely next to Raito on the loveseat, the lack of space nearly suffocating the younger man.

'-company.'

Sayu stared at the two, feeling completely out of the picture, but…

"You officially have the Sayu-stamp of approval!" Sayu jumped up from the couch and put her hands behind her back. Ryuuzaki smirked as he shifted himself that much closer to Raito.

Raito's eye twitched once again.

"It was very nice meeting you, Ryuuzaki-san, but I'm sure you and Raito would like to be alone now…" Sayu smirked also. "So I'll leave you two be."

'Don't leave me!' Raito thought despairingly as Sayu began collecting her things, getting ready to leave the apartment. As Sayu walked to the door, clasping onto the handle of the exit, she turned around once again, staring straight at Raito.

"I expect dirty, dirty details later, Rai-chan! Don't forget to wear a rubber, Ryuuzaki-san!"

Eye twitch. Fist clench. Snarl.

BANG!

And there went Sayu, laughing the whole way out of the apartment complex.

"You can get your hand off my thigh now, Ryuuzaki-san." Raito said without much hesitation, part of him glad the rebellious girl was gone while the other cried pathetically.

Why did he agree to this, again?

Ryuuzaki smiled. "But I don't want to, Raito-kun."

Eye twitch. "Don't make me hurt you, Ryuuzaki."

"Oh, I think I would like that, Raito-kun-"

Raito stood up without hesitation and glared down at the dark haired man. "What the hell, Ryuuzaki?! If that's your attempts at seduction, I think you won't be getting any from me for awhile."

'Is that a… pout?' Raito thought amusedly.

Yes… he was pouting. And badly.

"That look on your face is really not helping your case." Ryuuzaki stood up also, still hunched over in his sloppy way. "Raito-kun is playing hard to get, and it's very frustrating. Are my intentions not clear? Am I being too… subtle?"

"Oh, don't worry," Raito began loudly, "your… intentions are about as loud as a porn star during an orgasm. Subtlety has not been your problem." Raito crossed his arms as you he took a step back from the man.

Probably the wrong analogy to use from the look on Ryuuzaki's face, but it got his point across.

"How long have we known each other, Ryuuzaki-san?" Ryuuzaki looked up towards the ceiling as he once again brought his thumb to his mouth. "About two and half days, Raito-kun."

"And you want me to sleep with you after two and half days of knowing you, let alone what I actually know _about_you? We're almost completely perfect strangers!" Raito began tapping his foot against the floor as Ryuuzaki allowed a blank look to appear on his face.

"Well… Raito-kun is very attractive. I can't help it if my libido-"

"Ryuuzaki!" The obsidian-eyed man sighed despondently as he nodded.

"I will not try to coerce Raito into having sex with me." Raito sighed in relief as he then turned around, ready to get his coat. "Good. The more we get to know each other the easier it'll be to- Hey!" Raito spun back around, his coat hanging in one hand and his other protecting his bottom, as a red blush covered his burning cheeks.

Ryuuzaki grinned gauchely at the 23-year-old.

"I said I would not try to convince Raito-kun to sleep with me… I never said I would not touch him."

Raito sweat dropped.

'Of fucking hell, please don't act this way at the restaurant.' Raito thought to himself as Ryuuzaki gleefully lead them both out of the apartment.

What was this world coming to?

* * *

The two men arrived at the restaurant after 20 minutes of driving with Ryuuzaki's driver. (What the fuck?! Raito thought as they got into the Rolls Royce) During the car ride, 18 sets of bedroom eyes were sent by none other than Ryuuzaki himself, along with 16 not-so-subtle innuendo's, 14 attempts at groping and 12 successes in said gropings all occurred within said time span allotted.

Raito's body didn't think it could take the abuse anymore.

'_Yeah… abuse. Riiiiiiigggghhhhttttt.'_

After a strange glance from the greeter and making sure their seats were properly situated, both sat down, (Ryuuzaki garnering many weirded-out stares from the way he sat) with Ryuuzaki sending another steamy glimpse the man on the other side of the table.

It seemed that Raito would always be attracted to the perverts with no social boundaries whatsoever.

"You know, you keep making all these comments and trying to feel me up, but every time I ask you a question about yourself, you evade." Raito watched in satisfaction as the look in Ryuuzaki's face steadily vanished. "Why do you do that?"

Ryuuzaki pulled his gaze towards the table, a heavy sort of silence hanging over the dark haired man. "Well…"

"And what will you two gentlemen be having tonight?" A booming voice interrupted their conversation as a heavy set waiter came to their table and stared at both men awkwardly.

Raito sighed as he stated his own order first. "I'll have the Spinach and Ricotta Gnudi with Tomato-Butter Sauce. And you, Ryuuzaki-san?" Both men looked at the man expectedly as he vacantly stared at his wine glass, still waiting to be filled.

"I'll take some of your ricotta cheesecake. And please, bring the best wine you have to our table as well."

"Err…" The waiter glanced at Raito as he blinked. Ryuuzaki blinked up at the waiter, as he noticed he was still standing over them. "Is there a problem?"

The waiter almost looked intimated by the smaller man.

"No, of course not, sir! We'll get your food ready right away!" Was all the waiter said as he virtually ran away from the table.

Raito sweat dropped yet again.

"Nice people skills you've got there, Ryuuzaki-san."

Ryuuzaki simply gazed at Raito without blinking.

Because that wasn't uncomfortable at all.

Raito cleared his throat, ready to resume his question from before when a leg coincidentally brushed up against his own.

Eye twitch.

"Ryuuzaki-san… we're inside a public restaurant." Tight voice. Keep that voice tight, Raito.

The other man simply smirked.

"Hm… does Raito-kun enjoy doing these things publicly-"

"RAITO!"

The young artist jumped up within his chair as a loud bellow echoed within the once serene, restaurant.

Angry cinnamon eyes met shocked mahogany ones as an older gentleman entered the restaurant with a familiar woman by his side.

"Oh dear God, this shit only happens with me."

Ryuuzaki just blinked, his leg still suspended in mid-air under the table.

**_"I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want! So tell me what you want, what you really really want! I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ha."_**

Head Slam!

"I hate my life."

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own 'Wannabe' by The Spice Girls. They are lame, as is their songs. If you listen to them... I hate you by default. DX

Lol! I really have nothing to say except thanks for the love. Hopefully this chapter doesn't disappoint. XDXDXDXD


	7. Mending Broken Chains

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Seven: _Mending Broken Chains_

* * *

Once again, Yagami Raito wondered how in the hell he winded up in these predicaments. Whether it be some continuous freak twist of fate, or whatever God that actually existed that seemed to love to single him out, Raito always ended up getting royally screwed in the end.

Metaphorically, of course.

Before the ring tone could continue and the awkward glances he was receiving could persist, Raito quickly grabbed the cell phone from his pocket and declined the call without even glancing at the number.

If they were worth talking to, they would've called him at another time… and without such a fucked up ring tone to go with it.

'Damn you Spice Girls… damn you to hell!'

A shaky smile lit up the young man's face as Raito nodded towards his mother and father, now staring at him in both confusion and pent up anger in his father's case.

**Especially** in his father's case.

Yet, Raito forced himself to stay calm under the pressure and steeled himself rather magnificently while still suffering Yagami Soichirou's livid glower.

Too bad the same couldn't be said about Ryuuzaki.

His companion put down his leg from under the table and positioned it on top of the seat, leaning towards the slightly creeped-out couple. Balancing all of his weight on the balls of his sneaker-clad feet, wide black eyes with dark half-circles sagging underneath them stared unabashedly at both parents, analyzing them without a shred of shame.

Something Raito was feeling tons of, thank you very much.

Soichirou's furious eyes began to twitch repeatedly as other clientele within the restaurant set off on a series of whispers and mortifying stares fixed directly on their table.

You'd think Raito would be used to this by now. But really, Raito had always been thick-headed when it came to learning life's lessons.

The fed-up 23-year-old rolled his eyes as he stood up, garnering the dark-haired man's attention once again. He by passed the gaunt man's blank gaze and hesitantly put his hand on his father's arm and whispered something unintelligible in the older Yagami's ear. Soichirou stiffly nodded after a moment of silence, causing both Yagami Sachiko and Ryuuzaki to blink at the same time.

Raito brought out his winning smile at the two as he began to lead his explosive father away from the table. "We'll be back in a couple of minutes. We seem to have an urgent matter to discuss. Mother, Ryuuzaki, if you don't mind?"

Sachiko nodded hesitantly at her son, offering her own small smile of condolences as Ryuuzaki put his thumb to his lips and questioningly looked over at Raito's father. "I do not mind waiting for Raito-kun to return as long as Raito-kun promises to come back to the table without any bruises or scars as remembrances of this evening and in all one piece."

The comment was obviously **not **aimed at Raito.

An intentionally predatory smile overcame Ryuuzaki's pale lips as he narrowed his wide eyes at the middle-aged officer. "There are certainly other, much more enjoyable ways to ensure such memories anyhow-"

"We'll be right outside, we'll see you all in a little while, bye!" The cinnamon-eyed artist tightened his hold on his father's arm as he rushed this all out in one breath and ignored the growl that escaped Soichirou's lips. Ryuuzaki was now purposely baiting his father, and that was quite possibly one of the stupidest things to do in ANY given situation.

'And I thought he was smart!' Raito thought absently as hurriedly dragged the older Yagami from the table, who continued to glare menacingly at Ryuuzaki. It seemed to fly over Ryuuzaki's head, however, as both Raito's mother and Raito's non-date were left alone with each other.

The smaller, short haired woman cleared her throat, daintily sitting down and gently sipping a bit of the water placed on the table in front of her. Ryuuzaki's gaze now had a new target.

"So…" Sachiko began unsurely, a polite smile now etched on her face.

'I can see where Raito picks up his politeness now…' L thought absently. 'Maybe his mother will be a useful source of information, considering she seems to be the least hostile of the two parents…'

And that was a huge understatement if the murderous expression on Soichirou's face had been anything to go by.

"Yagami-san was enjoying the evening until walking into the restaurant, correct?" No point in trying to be subtle about it. They both knew this night was going down the drain as they spoke. "I suppose finding your son having dinner with another man can ruin one's night..."

'Guess I won't be getting laid tonight…' L thought forlornly.

Then, quite unexpectedly, Sachiko giggled, surprising L mid-thought. "I'm sure we all will continue to enjoy the evening, even after both my son and husband return. None of this should really come as a surprise to the poor old man, but…" A haggard expression wore its way on the older woman's delicate features. "He is stubborn. A trait that both he and Raito share, as you may have come to notice. I doubt those two will ever be on the same wave length, whether it be now or in the future."

Sachiko's face brightened after a moment of awkward silence on L's part. "But enough about that. Why don't you tell me more about yourself! Rai-chan rarely tells me about the boys he's dating."

Ryuuzaki's face must have expressed his sudden surprise, since the look on Sachiko's own face held much amusement. "It's like I said, something's really shouldn't come as such a surprise to my husband. Now, if you would start with your name? Then I'm sure we can continue on from there."

L grinned inwardly as a strong liking towards the older woman was formed.

"You may call me Ryuuzaki. And it's very nice to meet you, Yagami-san. I doubt Raito-kun would have allowed for us to meet for quite sometime if not for this evening."

"Oh, I wouldn't doubt that in the least! And please, just Sachiko is fine! That formality makes me feel so old!"

* * *

_**Meanwhile…**_

"Alright, go ahead!" Raito let go of his father as he spun around to face him, his face now contorting into its own version of resentment. "You want to yell at me like I'm some kind of child? Like I don't know what the hell I'm doing? Go ahead! I dare you! But I swear, if you make some kind of homophobic remark, I don't care if you ARE my father, I will not be responsible for my actions!"

Soichirou paced within the large parking lot as he looked at anything that wasn't his son. Dark amber eyes narrowed as he finally turned towards his son. "What the hell were you thinking, Raito?! The picture… why would you even THINK about painting something like that?!"

Raito's father glared at the younger man, looking ready to lunge at any given moment. "Have I done something to deserve this Raito? I don't think I have; not in the least. I never abused you, I always gave you all I could give-damn it, Raito! Why the hell would you-Gah!" The older man began to pace once again, this time clutching his head in his hands.

Raito's mouth thinned. "Are we still talking about the portrait, or me being gay?"

Soichirou's eye twitched.

"Does that bother you the most dad? Hell, I painted you as the depiction of death and destruction and allowed all of Japan to see, yet the fact that I have sex with guys disturbs you more than that?!" Raito walked right up to Soichirou's face, damning any consequences and ripped the hands away from the other man's face.

"Well guess what, daddy dearest? I'm GAY! Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay! Did you hear that? I said I like to-!"

Slap!

A heavy hand swiftly came across the younger man's face as a loud smack of flesh meeting flesh was heard.

"I KNOW, ALRIGHT! I'VE ALWAYS KNOWN, DAMN IT!" Raito grasped his aching cheek as he looked at his father in disappointment. The middle aged man's breathing began to become slow as he brought his shaking hand back to his side. "I know… and I don't want to."

A heavy silence draped over the two men as they both continued to gaze at each other, the distance evident within both their features.

"Is it sad that I would rather be oblivious than not know the truth about my own son? I don't care about the picture, Raito. I… I never did." Soichirou shifted his gaze towards the ground as Raito blinked in shock. "I know why you did it, and for that I can't blame you. It sickens me to even continue to work in the police force, knowing about what they're doing; right for everyone to see! I'm almost glad you didn't become an officer yourself at this point."

Raito's eyes softened for a moment as the years began to show themselves in his father's face. "Dad…"

"I can take the painting, because I know you mean good behind it. If a man like me, who has always taught you to stand up for what was right can't even face his own department's corruption… then I'm killing just as many lives as I have saved." Soichirou crossed his arms across his chest as he continued. "But, I can't accept what you're **doing**Raito. I've never… I mean, I know you haven't always been **normal**, but this-"

"How is me trying to find someone to hold onto not normal, dad?" Raito walked over to where his father stood and put a hand on his shoulder. "Because you say the person I'm looking for isn't the right gender? Or that I'm committing some kind of disgrace on the family? If that's the case, then the only one who's disgracing this family is you… for not allowing me to find the happiness everyone else seems to have."

"Dad, don't you want me to happy?" Soichirou's shoulders sagged as he nodded. "Of course I do Raito-"

"What if I said that man in there makes me happy? Would you really take that away from me?" The older man was quiet for a moment. The tension seem to finally seep out of his body completely and looked his son in the eyes, burning sepia matching his own.

Soichirou shook his head with a sigh and smiled shakily at his son. "Does he really? Make you happy, that is?"

Raito blushed.

"Well, I mean, I only meant it as an example, I didn't really mean-"

"Raito."

"And even if I felt something, I've only known the guy for like, two days-"

"Raito."

"If even that! Though, he is really interesting, so-"

"Raito!"

"Yes father?" Raito stopped his rambling as his father's smile became genuine.

"I get it."

"Right… I knew that." Raito's blush increased just a fraction. "I guess we should… go inside?"

The unspoken treaty for peace lay out on the non-proverbial table.

Soichirou blinked.

Raito smiled unsurely.

"Ok."

And that was that.

"And Raito?"

"Yes dad?"

"Err… not to sound strange or random, but… did you have the... Spice Girls playing as a ring tone when we came in?"

CRASH!

"Oh my God! Raito, Are you alright?!"

Raito looked up towards the sky, wondering just why the ground loved him so.

"… … I'm fine."

* * *

"And so I said – what about the fish sticks?"

Raucous laughter met their ears as both father and son entered the restaurant once again, this time not struggling to control any sudden bouts of rage, to see both Ryuuzaki and Sachiko cracking up over something the older woman had said.

"Well… they seem to be getting along fine." Raito muttered as Soichirou gaped over at his wife.

Both Raito and his father sweat dropped as the laughter raised in escalation.

"Sachiko?" Soichirou began, Raito's mother immediately turning towards him as his voice rang throughout the table. "Hello dear! Did you and Rai-chan settle your differences already?"

Raito's eye twitched at the endearment.

Oh why did mothers feel the need to embarrass their children… in public, no less?!

"Yes Rai-chan. Is everything alright?"

Double eye twitch.

"Don't call me that, Ryuuzaki. Unless you want to lose an eye AND a hand."

Both men knew this was not an empty threat.

"So, I guess we'll leave you two alone now?" Soichirou awkwardly commented as he went to grasp his wife's hand, but was stalled by the next comment. "Oh, heavens no! Both Ryuuzaki-kun and I have decided to make this a double-date, since I knew you two would get over whatever it was that was bothering the both of you! Aren't you both excited?!"

Raito and Soichirou turned towards the grinning woman, a look of horror covering both of their faces…

Until the older woman burst out into laughter once again.

"Oh, I was just kidding, Rai-chan!" The woman got up and took her husband's arm. "We'll leave you two alone now, since I know how much you would like that! There are other restaurants to eat at, after all!" Sachiko winked at Ryuuzaki, as if they had a shared secret.

Raito suddenly became that much more scared.

'First my sister, now my mother?! Dear God, how the fuck does this guy do it?!'

Ryuuzaki grinned as the smiling mother and scarred looking father began to leave the restaurant. Before they got away from the table, Raito's father turned around once more.

"We'll talk again soon, Raito."

And that was how Raito knew that everything really was going to be alright between himself and his father…

Eventually.

"It really was a pleasure meeting you, Sachiko-san. And you as well, Soichirou-san. Hopefully we'll see each other soon." Soichirou's eye twitched on last time as Sachiko nodded her agreement, both her and Soichirou finally exiting the restaurant.

The grin on Ryuuzaki's face then changed to something much more sinister.

'Oh dear god, no one can help me now.'

"So our food arrived while I was outside, huh?" Raito gestured at his lukewarm food and Ryuuzaki's already mostly eaten dish. A gleam sparkled in the older man's dark eyes as he perused Raito's slightly nervous (but still trying to hide it) disposition.

Silent nod.

Perverted grin.

Sweat drop.

"I guess we should get start-"

"_**Gimme, Gimme more, Gimme, More, Gimme, Gimme, More! Gimme, Gimme more, Gimme, More Gimme, Gimme, More! Gimme, Gimme more-"**_

Really, Raito didn't even know why he bothered being embarrassed anymore.

Though if the EXTREMELY SCARY perverted grin on Ryuuzaki's face was anything to go by… he didn't think he even knew what the word embarrassed meant yet.

Raito looked at the number quickly and accepted the call with a twitching eye (really, he needed to get that checked out). "Sayu-"

"RAITO, DON'T GO TO YOUR APARTMENT TONIGHT!"

Raito blinked as the high pitched voice almost deafened him in surprise. Ryuuzaki looked at the cell phone with a piece of cheesecake hanging off his chin, obviously not needing to be near the phone to also hear the inhuman shriek.

"Wah…?" Raito dumbly commented.

"Raito…" Sayu took an audible breath and tried to calm herself. "You won't believe who just called me… and I mean, you won't BELIEVE who freaking CALLED ME!"

"You don't mean-"

"YES!"

Raito's eyes widened comically.

"When did he get back from America?! I thought he had some kind of major case there still going on!"

"I don't know, but he's at your apartment right now… waiting for you… OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR, THE FREAKING STALKER!"

"How did he even find out my new address?! I specifically told everybody who knew not to say a word!"

"Raito honey, he's a fucking STALKER! Do you think it matters if someone tells him where you live or not?! Guy's a nutbag! You can't go home…"

"So where do you propose I stay, smart ass."

Sayu stayed silent for a moment, obviously contemplating Raito's question.

"You can stay with me." The deep baritone voice cut through the phone conversation as Raito looked up to find Ryuuzaki staring at him intently.

"What do you-"

"I may only be able to hear half the conversation, or at least 75 percent of it by the way your sister is screaming off the top of her lungs," Ryuuzaki shuffled his feet from on top of the chair, "but it's obvious you need a lending hand. I would be willing to offer up Raito-kun a place to stay for the night if his apartment is unacceptable for the time being."

Raito sighed despondently, not knowing if he should be grateful for the offer or not.

'So, your choices are a crazy stalker who persists on trailing after you, even after you have repeatedly told him you are NOT interested, or a pervert you barely know who continually tries to not only molest you, but rape you with his eyes.'

"To be either ferociously stalked or ferociously molested, what a great choice." Raito murmured to himself.

"Say what now?!" Sayu screeched through the cell phone. Raito almost hit himself in the head for forgetting.

"Nothing, now-"

"Did Ryuuzaki just offer to let you stay at his house? And you haven't said yes yet? WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU! YOU MAY JUST FINALLY GET LAI-"

Click.

Nuisance Number One: Taken care of.

"Now, what does Raito-kun say about staying with-"

"Ryuuzaki," Raito began evenly, "without saying anything else, what is the percentage, if I were to stay with you, that is, that I would be getting fondled in my sleep?"

Ryuuzaki said nothing for a moment.

"Ryuuzaki?"

"... ... ... 84.76 percent."

"I think that answers your question rather nicely. Don't you agree?"

The raccoon-eyed man pouted for the rest of the meal.

* * *

"So... here we are... at my apartment... ready to go upstairs..." Raito shakily go out of the Rolls Royce and stared up at the apartment building.

Ryuuzaki got of the car alongside the 23-year-old and grabbed his hand. "I'm sure everything will be fine, Raito-kun, but if you still want to come stay with me-"

"RAITO-SAMA!"

SUPER GLOMP!

Ryuuzaki blinked as a tall, dark haired man wearing glasses jumped on top of Raito and hugged him, ripping the man's hand apart from his own. "I've missed your heavenly face so much! I tried calling you earlier tonight, but you never picked up!"

Double sweat drop.

Well, that explained a lot.

"Hey... Mikami-kun..." Raito looked up pleadingly at Ryuuzaki from sidewalk he now inhabited, but was stunningly shocked once he saw the angry look on the still-standing man's face.

His eye was even TWITCHING!

"Uh..."

Mikami looked up to see who it was that Raito was staring at, frowning at the sight of another man near HIS Raito-sama! "And who are you?"

Eye twitch...

Predatory smirk?

'Oh please don't say something stupid Ryuuzaki...' Raito though futilely.

"I'm Rai-chan's boyfriend."

Mikami's grip on the 23-year-old artist tightened immensely as he glared at Ryuuzaki. Ryuuzaki then glared back as he suddenly kicked the lawyer off his "boyfriend" and clutched on to the shocked man.

Why did the words 'Bitch Fight' suddenly hold that much more meaning to Raito?

'Oh dear lord, why didn't I just take the molestation?'

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own "Gimme More" by Brittany Spears. No mocking comments this time, I think what she's going through right now is punishment enough for these songs. DX

Lol! So... any good? XD This was actually my favorite chapter to write so far! Yayz! And before any one asks, the switch between 'Ryuuzaki' and 'L' in one of the scenes is intentional. You'll notice I do that if I'm either writing from L's perspective or Raito is not in the scene... Anyways, I hoped you enjoyed the latest chapter! See ya soon!


	8. Throw downs and Showdowns

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Eight: _Throw-downs and Showdowns_

* * *

"What do you mean, Raito-sama's boyfriend?! You don't even look like his type!" Mikami shrieked as he grabbed Raito's free hand and pulled him in his direction. "I've known him longer, anyways. If he's anybodies boyfriend, it's mine!"

Raito sweat dropped.

"Mikami-kun, I've told you time and again, I don't like you that wa-"

"LA, LA, LA! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! LA, LA, LA!" Mikami jumped around while not relinquishing his hold on Raito's arm, showing him just how much he 'wasn't listening.'

'Dear sweet Kelly Clarkson, the man is completely off his rocker.' Raito thought as Mikami continued to tug on his hand, trying to pull the artist closer to him... with no real results.

Ryuuzaki didn't even look like he was breaking a sweat as he continued to hold Raito's arm within his grip and stood perfectly still. In fact, the big old pervert looked like he was enjoying himself in all of his psuedo-bored-like glory. Probably because he wasn't the rope in a very odd, very PUBLIC human version of tug-o'-war.

'Seriously... what the fuck?!' Raito winced as Mikami pulled on his hand and arm a bit too roughly. 'Why the fuck is it always me?'

"Raito-sama LOVES MEEEEEEEEE!" The psychotic fan-boy suddenly screeched, ignoring the sudden strange glances thrown in his direction.

"Can't we at least take this upstairs? Where no one is watching?!" The tan-skinned artist screamed out as his arm was once again strained in a painful manner by his self-proclaimed biggest fan.

The other two men continued to ignore him.

"Rai-chan cannot love you because you both disgust and annoy him... and myself, for that matter. Rai-chan. Is. Mine. So let him go, you wandering wall humper. "

"What?!"

"You heard me quite clearly, you ignoramus. Now take your hands off of my boyfriend before I brake your arm in 24 places."

"No way, you poor man's cracky version of Johnny Depp! Your freak ass doesn't even deserve to be in the same VICINITY as Raito-sama!"

"So says the psycho that was standing outside his doorway for the past two hours. I'm so insulted."

"What do you know? What Raito-sama and I have is something special!"

"Oh, it's special alright. Especially fucked up."

"Fuck you, you ass-hole!"

"Oh, run out of semi-intelligent insults already? Why am I not surprised?"

"Grr..."

'It's almost like two dogs trying to mark their territory.' Raito thought absently as Ryuuzaki and Mikami continued to clutch to each of his arms that were in their possesions. 'Hopefully neither gets the smart idea to pee on me...'

Golden showers were not Raito's thing.

'_Whatever. We all know what kind of kinky shit goes through __**this**__ innocent domain_.'

Raito stifled an embarrassed cough as the small voice echoed throughout his head. 'That's between me and my porn collection!'

'_And what an extensive collection it is. But really, just between you and your porn collection? That's like saying that those gag balls in your closet are for those 'oh so special' occassions. Dude, you so need to get fucked_.'

The 23-year-old artist was going insane if even he was telling himself that he needed to get laid.

"Raito-sama! Tell me what this..." Mikami looked at Ryuuzaki from top to bottom in a disgusted fashion. "_**Thing**_ says isn't true."

Both pairs of angry eyes (though one a bit more bland than the other) finally turned to the man in question as sweat began to pour in the back of Raito's neck in buckets.

He had three options, really.

Option A: Say "Hell no! This pervert isn't mine!" and most likely be mauled by Mikami and never see Ryuuzaki ever again.

'Well, that's automatically out just for the simple fact that I don't want to mauled by this psychotic lunatic!' Raito thought in a panic.

He ignored the twinge of discomfort in his stomach at the thought of never seeing Ryuuzaki again, thinking that his indigestion was acting up again.

'Knew I shouldn't have eaten all that damn sauce...'

Option B: Say "Yes, Mikami-kun. Both Ryuuzaki and I are dating... exclusively, you little freak." And most likely listen to one of Mikami's famous temper tantrums while Ryuuzaki undressed him with his eyes and tried to grope him in some fashion.

Or...

Option C: Run, run, run, run, run, run, run the fuck away!

'Hmm... option C has a lot of appeal...' Raito thought to himself. He tested Ryuuzaki's grip on his arm for himself, but quickly learned that the anorexic man was not as sickly as he looked. 'Hot damn, the man has the hold of The Hulk on steroids!'

Guess option C was out of the question.

Raito tried to pull out of the semi-embrace once more, but stopped once Ryuuzaki gave him his own version of a super death glare.

Ryuuzaki meant business.

And quite frankly, Ryuuzaki was fucking scary when he meant business, as Raito now realized.

Raito sighed as he resigned himself for the inevitable and poised himself with as much grace and practically non-existent dignity as he could muster. 'I can't believe I'm doing this...'

"Yes, Mikam-kun. Both Ryuuzaki and I are dating... exclusively." There. Raito said it. He didn't have to wait very long now.

Mikami's face turned an unnatural shade of reddish-purple.

'Oh, here we go.'

"WWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"

Dogs began to bark.

Volcano's spontaneously erupted.

Children cried for no reason.

The moon turned black as night.

Mikami's shriek undoubtedly shook the far reaches of heaven.

Raito simply blinked as one of his arms escaped the lawyer's monster hold, and backed up against the bony figure behind him. Ryuuzaki grabbed him by the shoulders, leaning his head next to Raito's as they both stared at the shaking man in front of him.

"Why would Raito-sama choose this... this... WEIRDO over me?" Mikami began to sob, clutching his face with both hands while throwing himself on top of the sidewalk. "I thought we had a BOOOOOONNNNNDDDDDD!"

"Err..." Raito glanced at Ryuuzaki as the iron-clasped insomniac finally let go of his death grip on the poor 23-year-old, allowing the artist to walk to the crazy lawyer... hesitantly, of course. Raito reluctantly patted him on the back, not really sure of what to say. "It's not me, Mikami-kun, it's you... wait... I said that wrong. It's, well, it's not me. Forget it, Mikami-kun. It's you. It's totally you and your psycho-ness."

Mikami just sobbed even harder.

"If it makes you feel better, you're the craziest, most obssessed fan I've ever had!"

Nope, it really didn't if the tears bursting out of the man's eyes were anything to go by.

And then the sobbing just stopped.

"I've got an idea!"

Raito quite suddenly had one of his 'Oh fuck, this is going to embarrass the shit out of me!' feelings...

And those were hardly ever wrong.

"I shall compete for my Raito-sama's love!"

"You really don't have to-"

"You! Pitiful man! I challenge you to a dong contest!"

Crash!

Raito wasn't even moving that time as his ass met the floor.

Ryuuzaki blinked as he absently helped the poor dazed man up to his feet. "And that is...?"

"You know..." Mikami gestured to his crotch. "That kind of contest."

Ryuuzaki's eyes widened in comprehension. "Oh... Alright."

"Good. Now on a count of three, we draw."

"Mikami-kun! Ryuuzaki! If you HAVE to do this, PLEASE do it inside were people CAN'T SEE-!"

"One..."

"I mean, really, we're more civilized than this-"

"Two..."

"I swear to God, if you two don't stop-"

"THREE!"

Raito managed to stop Mikami before he could reach for his pants, but looked over in horror as Ryuuzaki reached for his pant's zipper.

Zip.

Pants drop.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... What?" Ryuuzaki asked innocently, thumb to his lips as he stood pants-less.

Raito was the first one to speak.

"GREAT MOTHER OF ALL THAT'S HOLY, RYUUZAKI, YOU COULD POKE SOMEONE'S EYE OUT WITH THAT THING!"

Mikami immediately fainted from the rapid blood loss from the brain.

"I guess that means I've won, huh Raito-kun?" Ryuuzaki tilted his head to the side, his pants still around his ankles. Random strangers stared at the dark haired pants-less man in wonderment, all mystified by Ryuuzaki's apparently... er... good fortune?

"Ryuuzaki..." Raito's eye twitched as he shook his head in anger, the stunned shock fading as Ryuuzaki attempted to inch closer within his personal bubble. "Put your pants back on."

'Perverted grin. Oh, please don't give that perverted grin with your pants down.' Raito thought to himself as his cheeks grew crimson.

"I would prefer if Raito-kun would pull them up for me." Ryuuzaki continued to grin creepily as he tilted his head to the side.

Eye twitch.

"I think I'll go upstairs, now." Raito stated without any signs of hesitation. Ryuuzaki frowned despondently.

Pull.

Zip.

Pout.

Everyone still continued to stare.

"Ryuuzaki, you should get going now." Raito said between clenched teeth. Ryuuzaki grabbed Raito's arm, tilting his head to the side once more. "Will Raito-kun at least allow me to escort him to his door?"

Raito looked over at the man, both of them knowing Ryuuzaki was pushing his luck. Raito almost said no.

Almost.

Chestnut-colored locks gently blew in the nightly breeze as he nodded his head and allowed himself to be dragged back up to his apartment by the residential pervert who also happened to be generously well endowed.

Mikami was long forgotten as he continued to lay on the sidewalk unconscious.

* * *

Raito turned towards Ryuuzaki as he slowly unlocked the door and put his hand on the knob. "Well, in between getting embarrassed by my sister, you constantly molesting me, yelling at my father, and being stalked by some crazy fanatic, I suppose I could say I had a nice time."

Ryuuzaki smiled at the younger man, seemingly laughing at the ridiculousness the night had had to offer the both of them. "At least Raito-kun has had an interesting night."

Interesting was one of the nicer words Raito would have used to describe the night.

'I'd say more like fucked up from the floor up... but that's more than one word, so it doesn't count.'

"I suppose this is good night?" Raito whispered as he was about to open the door.

"Don't I at least get a good night kiss for our 'non-date?'" Raito paused for a second, weighing his options once more...

'Oh, what the hell. I've already seen the guy's penis. What's a kiss going to do?'

Raito let go of the knob, and completely turned towards Ryuuzaki, giving his consent. Ryuuzaki pressed himself up to Raito very intimately, every square inch of their bodies coming into immediate contact. "I am deducting that this is a yes?"

Raito rolled his eyes. "What do you think?"

Without saying another word, the older man closed the minute distance. Rose colored lips tingled at the contact, Ryuuzaki not even hesitating in the slightest in bringing up his hands and thrusting them into Raito's silky strands of hair.

For a minute, the light haired man held his breath as the chaste contact sent tiny tingles up and down his spine. Eyes fluttered closed as both men lost themselves within the warm sensations. Raito then moaned slightly as a warm wet appendage slowly slid across his lower lip, begging for access.

All of Raito's inclinations faded away within the vestiges of his mind as the man parted his lips and the two tongues then fought for dominance. Without realizing it, Raito grabbed onto Ryuuzaki's waist, clashing their hips against one another.

A groan escaped the older man's lips as their crotches ground alongside each other. Ryuuzaki brought down one of his hands from Raito's hair, grabbing onto one of the man's thighs and pushing it up against his own leg so that there wouldn't be the smallest of spaces in between their bodies while he continued to shove the artist against the door. Raito mewled in content, his hands trailing up from Ryuuzaki's narrow waist and winding around the slender neck so close to his own. The two finally broke apart, gasping for air as they each tightened their hold around the other's body simultaneously.

'Woah...' Raito thought momentarily stunned as he swiped his tongue across his lower lip slowly.

"'Woah' would be the appropriate assessment, Raito-kun." Ryuuzaki stated breathlessly as Raito blinked dazedly.

'I said that out loud?'

"Yes, Raito-kun. As well as that."

"... ... ... oh."

Ryuuzaki smiled... this time, geniunely.

Raito liked this smile...

"Does this mean Raito-kun will allow me to go past second base with him now?"

And then Ryuuzaki, of course, had to mess it up.

'He was so close... and yet, so far.' Ratio thought wistfully.

"Let me think for a second. How about, no."

"That's not what the boner in your pants is say-"

"Good night, now!" Raito ripped himself away from Ryuuzaki's slack grip and kissed him on the cheek. He waved quickly and then slammed the door on the obsidian eyed man's face, just for good measure.

"I'll see Raito-kun tomorrow!"

As Raito leaned against the door, a smile lit up on his face as he heard the muffled words through the wooden barrier.

As crazy as it sounded... Raito already couldn't wait.

* * *

I will say this now; for those of you looking for an intelligent, plot driven piece with lots of L vs. Raito with them being all 'in character'... I suggest going some place else. For everyone else... here you go. XDXDXD I lied last chapter. This was the most fun I had writing this story so far, though that is subject to change. Welcome to "Discordant Harmony" every body, the craziness really HAS officially commmenced.


	9. Wherever the Road May Lead

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Nine: _Wherever the Road May Lead_

* * *

_Italics: Flashback_

* * *

A mixture of crisp burnt oranges and burgundy reds swirled around the rich canvas as Raito's fine brush strokes completed his latest masterpiece.

'Just a few more minute details, and everything should be perfect...' Raito thought in satisfaction.

Mahogany eyes twinkled in delight as a small smile spread across rosy red lips. Serenity was a hard thing to attain if your name was Yagami Raito, new comer artist extraordinaire. Almost two months had passed since that... err... fateful (insane) night out with Ryuuzaki, and it seemed that things were finally beginning to settle down into a routine Raito felt he could handle.

The young man really shouldn't have gotten so comfortable, so quickly. Things were known to go down the shit hill for him in less than a second.

The mysterious man who had managed to not only confuse him, but attract him (strangely enough) had kept a continuous grasp on the 23-year-old's life. Between the constant nightly calls at exactly 6:00 p.m., and the ravenous attempts at getting the younger of the two to willingly invite him over to Raito's apartment, the light haired man could say, without a shadow of a doubt, that Ryuuzaki was becoming a staple he was steadily getting used to.

And that actually **didn't** scare the shit out of him.

Raito thought back on their last phone conversation, shaking his head in exasperation as he looked down at his beautiful painting.

* * *

_"Raito-kun sounds lonely." _

_The monotone voice almost made the younger man laugh as he held the cell phone precariously between his shoulder and ear. "Lonely? And what makes the self proclaimed hermit-man say that? Especially considering I'm the more sociable of the both of us... and that's just sad, to tell you the truth."_

_Raito smiled as an awkward chuckle met his ears. _

_'I like to hear him laugh...' the mahogany eyed artist absently thought to himself..._

_And then promptly shoved that thought into his '**Shit I did not think!**' memory box he held in the far corners of his mind. _

_Yes, thank god for selective memory and sweet, sweet denial._

_"Raito-kun is meant to be around people, unlike myself. However, every time I call him, he is by himself in his apartment brooding about something or another." Ryuuzaki stated knowingly._

_"You would rather I were here with a different guy every night?" _

_Raito could swear he could practically HEAR the man's blood boil in anger._

_"I did not say such a thing. Nor is it acceptable to even take into account... so don't." Ryuuzaki's voice tightened considerably, making Raito smile slyly._

_"So what, then?" _

_"Raito deserves to be with someone who can satisfy his social needs." _

_"Guess that means you coming over is out of the question, then." Raito smirked. _

_"Of course not, Raito-kun. I believe Raito-kun's company is one of the only substantial persons I am able to stand when it comes to people-related relations."_

_Raito didn't know if that was a compliment or not, considering who it was coming from. _

_"Besides... I am sure I would be able to satisfy ALL of Raito-kun's needs, let alone his social ones, should I come over to his home." Raito sweat dropped._

_The man wasn't even trying to be subtle at this point... not that Ryuuzaki had made such a point to being all that discreet to begin with. _

_Raito wasn't even bothered by the dark-haired man's perverseness anymore, and that was the hardest pill to swallow. _

_... ... ... ... Oh dear sweet honey bunches of oats, he was getting to be just as perverted._

_"Ryuuzaki, shut up." _

_"Raito-kun is so cute when he tries to act like a prude. I think we both know just how much you want me to screw-"_

_"I SAID SHUT UP, YOU SOCIALLY-STUNTED IDIOT!"_

_"Socially stunted, maybe, but not stunted in the way it counts."_

_Raito was speechless for less than a second. Did he even really have the right to even be surprised anymore?_

_"Does everything have to have sexual connotations with you?" Raito questioned unnecessarily. _

_"I am only stating the truth. Raito-kun has seen the size of my-"_

_"Ok! I get it... you want to have sex with me with your huge penis. Message attained."_

_"Hmm... now all we need to do is set a time and a place, and Raito-kun will have sealed the de-"_

_Click._

_Just because he liked the pervert, didn't mean he didn't get fed up with him. And that was when hanging up in people's faces came in handy. _

_'Thank God for my ability to not care about rudeness.'_

* * *

Raito had to chuckle to himself. Even the memory of the other man always managed to bring laughter out of the bright-eyed artist.

Hysterical or otherwise.

It was always funny to listen to the way Ryuuzaki would plead his case, acting as if his coming over to his apartment was at times, a purely innocent affair. When that didn't work, then came the next level of extreme: promises of rough, wild sex. Raito snorted as he began clearing up his small work area within his apartment. 'I already have one crazy stalker, I don't need a perverted kinky one, too.'

Though he was hardly an angel, so who was he to talk?

Although, Raito wouldn't doubt if scaring Mikami (who had yet to show his face since the now infamous 'dong contest') was one of the reasons, other than the sexing up, Ryuuzaki was trying to butt his way over to his humble abode.

"Because that isn't strange at all..." Raito muttered to himself as he walked into his spacious bathroom and began to wash his multicolored hands. "Those two are next level creepy."

The impatient auburn-haired artist sighed as he glanced at the clock to the right of his medicine cabinet and dried his wet hands.

Fifteen minutes to Six.

'Any minute now...' Raito hummed to himself as he exited the bathroom and walked into the living room. The 23-year-old flopped elegantly onto the comfortable couch and stretched, his weary bones popping at the sensation. As Raito leaned back into the cushions, an overwhelming weariness overcame his exhausted frame. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, glancing at the expensive contraption.

Raito then attempted to do his best impression of Ryuuzaki and stared unblinkingly at the phone for several seconds.

Wide brown eyes began to dry out as the phone lay innocently within his hand, but still Raito stared...

The handsome young man was then interrupted from his self imposed staring contest by a horrendous banging on his very expensive, and very sensitive wooden door.

BANG, BANG, BANG!

Raito whined to himself as one name popped immediately into mind.

"Sayuuuuuuuuuuu..." The young artist threw his head back on the tempting couch, a part of him wishing he could ignore the obnoxious banging, and the equally obnoxious girl...

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

"RAITO! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, YOU MULTI-FLAVORED SKITTLE! NOW OPEN UP BEFORE I MAKE YOU TASTE THE RAINBOW, YOU MAN-BITCH!"

But could the force named Yagami Sayu really be ignored? Especially while his neighbors were most likely opening their doors and glaring angrily at her?

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Raito ignored the 'Ew... keep that to yourself!' Sayu muttered through the door as he placed his cell phone on the coffee table and opened the only thing barricading him from the aforementioned crazy person.

Sayu was insane, and would now be able to enter the Apartment of Raito's Solitude. Oh, the Teletubby Horror.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, YOU FREAKING PSYCHO?!" Raito suddenly yelled as the door swung open, ignoring the random neighbors in the hallway staring at the two of them.

"What do I want...?" Sayu asked quietly after a couple moments of silence, her eyes watering in picturesque-cuteness. "What I want is... is..."

Sayu then grabbed her brother and grinned maniacally.

"WORLD PEACE AND WEED! Both in preferably that order, though if you just have the weed..."

Raito rolled his mahogany eyes once again before angrily pulling the young girl inside and locking the door behind them.

Raito's neighbor's shook their heads simultaneously, realizing they would never be able to figure out just what the hell was wrong with both their tenant, and all the freaky weirdo's he seemed to attract.

* * *

"O-nii-chan!" The young girl sang out as Raito raked a nervous hand through his gorgeous hair. "Onii-chan! Look at meeeeeeeee!"

Eye twitch. Fist clench. Eye twitch. Fist clench.

"You are going to kill me one of these days, Sayu."

Sayu giggled lightly as she skipped past her brother and dived into 'her' couch. "Rai-chan knows he loves me!"

Raito sighed. "Yeah, when you're not here."

The young girl ignored the negative comment rather admirably.

"So what has onii-chan been up to for the last... two days, four hours, thirty five minutes and... 56 seconds I have not seen him?" Sayu smiled widely as Raito sat on the other side of the couch.

"You keep track of the time when we're apart?" Raito asked in estranged awe.

"Tch. Fuck no. I just like to creep you out by making you think that I do. And from the awkward look on your face, my job seems to be done." Sayu bounced in her seat and turned so that she could completely face her brother. "So how has Ryuuzaki been treating you? Have you guys bumped bumpers yet?"

"Uh, no."

"Done the twisted tango?"

"I don't think so?"

"Completed the jig saw puzzle of love?"

"Wha?"

"Figured out how many licks it takes to get to the center of the tootsie roll pop?"

"Ok, you're just pulling these things out of your ass, now."

"Recorded the next American Idol on TiVo?"

"Wait, why the hell-?"

"So you could totally masturbate to Ryan Seacrest together, of course."

"Ew. Ew. Ew. Did I mention-Ew."

"I'm guessing not, then."

"I'd be saying you were guessing right."

"Well," Sayu exasperatedly began, "what the hell are you waiting for? You've only got one life, Raito! Live it already!"

Raito rolled his eyes as he got up from the couch and walked into his bedroom, gathering a small bundle of clothing from his drawers. "It's not that simple Sayu. This isn't just about sex, because if it was, I would have already have had a ride on the 'Ryuuzaki Train,' as you so eloquently have stated once before. Now, I'm going to take a shower! If Ryuuzaki calls, and hopefully he doesn't while you're still here, tell him to call me back later... when you're not in my vicinity please."

Sayu's mouth twitched in silent laughter as she twiddled her thumbs innocently for a couple of minutes and waited for the sound of water streaming out of the shower to echo within the large apartment. She turned to the cell phone in question, an evil grin overcoming her youthful visage. The maple haired girl picked up the phone and carefully scrolled down the number listings until she found the name she was looking for. She pressed the 'call' button and patiently waited for that certain someone to answer.

"Raito-kun?"

Sayu laughed maniacally in her head.

"Nope... this is his sister. Now, how interested are you in getting lucky tonight, Ryuuzaki-san?"

Oh, she was so going to get her brother laid by the end of the night, and that was a promise.

* * *

Raito got out of the bathroom 30 minutes later, his showers always timed to perfection. A towel hung on his bare shoulders as a pair of sweat pants clung to his impeccable hips. Raito blinked, expecting to be mauled by his sister, but was instead faced with a vacant apartment.

'Not that I'm complaining...' Raito thought to himself. 'But usually, this is an omen of much misfortune when Sayu manages to leave my place of her own free will.'

Seriously, the girl had no boundaries when it came to his super cool apartment. Raito was about to go check his bedroom, just to make sure the little demon wouldn't spring out of no where and scare the flawlessness out of him, when an inhuman sound nearly deafened the poor man's ears.

_**"Upside, inside out, she's livin la vida loca! She'll push and pull you down, livin la vida loca. Her lips are devil red and her skin's the color mocha-"**_

"Of all things, Sayu," Raito rubbed his temples with his palms, "why, oh why, Ricky Martin? Do you really hate me that much, little sister?"

_**"She will wear you out livin la vida loca! Come On! Livin la vida loca! Come on! She's livin la vida loca..."**_

Raito ran to the cell phone and agreed to the call, not even looking at the number... which really was starting to become a very bad habit for the young man. "Hello?"

"Raito-kun..."

"Ryuuzaki?"

"Yes. Would Raito-kun be much obliged to open the door now? I've been calling him for the past 10 minutes with no answer."

"You're-!"

"Yes, and I must say, Raito-kun... Ricky Martin? I know we are both gay, but..." Ryuuzaki's monotone voice gave way to slight amusement as Raito's eye twitched once again. "You do not get much gayer than that."

Raito closed the phone with a snap and made towards the door, forgetting one little detail as he came face to face with the perverted genius.

"It seems Raito-kun has begun without me."

A crimson red blush ran all the way down Raito's face and visible torso as the shameless hentai in front of him ogled his... goodies.

"GAH!"

Before Raito could run back inside and grab a shirt, Ryuuzaki tackled him onto the ground, shutting the door closed behind him.

"It's quite alright, though, Raito-kun." Ryuuzaki stated predatorily as he straddled the younger man's lap. "I'm sure I can catch up."

Raito banged his head on the floor, damning whatever entity did this to him.

'I hate my life, I hate my life, I hate my life, I hate my life, I hate my life, I hate-oh... that... feels nice.'

"Raito-kun likes that?" Ryuuzaki smirked down at the 23-year-old, hands trailing down the other's abdomen, before the younger of the two snapped out of his momentary daze and pushed him off his thighs.

'Hello, molestation. How have you been these couple of weeks?' Raito rolled his eyes as he quickly made it to his room. 'I've been just dandy...'

"Will Raito-kun be gone long? I still have a lot of groping-time to make up for!"

CRASH!

"Raito-kun?"

Raito painfully moaned from his spot on the hardwood floor.

"Oh, why me?"

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Living the Vida Loca" by Ricky Martin, but if I did, I would so totally play it everyday... and proclaim my gayness to the free world. Why, oh why do you still live in that prettily decorated closet, Ricky?

Lol! As you can see, this chapter is more in preparation for this next, but I'm sure you guys can tell. ((sigh)) I hate filler chapters, don't you? But still so necessary. So... next chapter. Be there, or be square. And no, that totally didn't sound stupid. I swear. (That rhymes! XD) Responses, maybe? Maybe not? Eh, I don't really care either way. Lol!


	10. Fighting a Losing Battle

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Ten: _Fighting a Losing Battle_

* * *

"Raito-kun?" The low baritone voice called out into the bedroom, searching the space with wide ebony eyes before finding the young man still sprawled out on the floor. L concentrated on the delicious body below him, eyes raking in the younger artist's diminutive curves in the dimming specks of light coming from the window.

'Oh… that's just too convenient.' L thought lustfully to himself as Raito stared up at him from the floor. "What do you want, Ryuuzaki?" Raito began to pick himself up from the floor, his aching bottom bruised from the unexpected fall.

L gave the man no warning as he once again jumped on top of him and pushed him onto the cold ground once again. "I thought that was pretty obvious, Raito-kun." L grinned dirtily. Raito's eye twitched (which L thought was so cute!) as he clenched his fist in what the older man presumed to be annoyance. "Obvious, Ryuuzaki? Obvious is the understatement of the freaking DECADE when it comes to you. But you do realize you will be getting none from me tonight, correct?"

L pouted as he began to caress Raito's chest again, secretly delighting in the small inhalation of breath the chestnut haired man took in as he did so. "But Raito-kun… I feel as if I will suffer from blue balls if we continue this 'will he, won't he' game."

Raito sweat dropped as he felt L's noticeable… err… evidence to this statement.

"Seriously, Ryuuzaki? Already?"

"Raito-kun should not talk, he seems to be halfway there himself-"

"Yet, we're not talking about me, are we?!" Raito blushed violently as L grinned down at the boy.

"Raito-kun's body wants this as much as I do. Maybe if I begin with that, the mind will follow soon after…" L whispered as he ground his hips onto the lap below him, eliciting a small gasp from those lovely strawberry colored lips.

'Mmm… strawberries…'

If L remembered correctly, Raito's lips tasted as sweet as the wonderful fruit. 'Why not one more taste, just to make sure…'

Raito didn't even see it coming.

A supple mouth descended upon Raito's own, muffling his next words. L quickly gained access inside the warm crevice, plunging in without a second thought. Cool hands continued to glide across the wet torso as the warm body beneath him tensed for a moment before completely becoming limp.

Well, if that wasn't an invitation to continue, L didn't know what was.

Tanned hands that weren't his own intertwined into his dark hair, a sleepy moan vibrating in Raito's throat. Dark eyes closed lightly as L concentrated on the sugary taste invading his tongue.

'This boy tastes too sweet for his own good…' L perched himself in a more comfortable position on Raito's body, trying to keep as much absolute contact between each other as possible. L lightly suckled the man's lip as Raito's own hands began to trail down his own body, slowly crawling up L's shirt to achieve as much skin-on-skin contact as he could.

God bless the boy, he was finally getting with it.

L sighed softly, his mouth moving down to suckle Raito's neck (even the man's skin was delicious) as his fingers finally got to the younger man's crotch, his hand right above it, ready to make his move-

Tap, tap, tap!

L blinked as he looked up, glaring in the direction of the noise that had just interrupted his 'Make Raito have sex with me!' time.

"Ryuuzaki…" The man's breathless voice, barely coming out as a gasp made L harder than he already was. "I have to… answer the door."

Now, here was Raito underneath him, half naked and WILLING! Glistening in both water from his former shower and developing sweat, practically writhing below L's body… did L mention that man was WILLING?!

"The door can wait." L stated bluntly as he dropped down on the other's lips once more, muffling any protests the artist might have. Hands gripped Raito's waist tightly as the younger of the two began to push away the insistent man.

TAP, TAP, TAP!

"Ryuuzaki, I have to see who it is!" Raito panted as he pulled away from L's mouth.

"This random person is more important to Raito-kun than finally releasing some of his (and mine) sexual frustration?" L pouted cutely (or tried to) as Raito leaned back on the floor and unexpectedly smiled at the dark haired pervert. "I'm sure you can wait a little while longer, Ryuuzaki. Besides, who said you were going to get laid tonight?"

"Your sister." L answered quickly without a second thought. Raito's eye twitched in anger.

"WHAT?!"

L blinked as Raito pushed him off completely and glared down at him. Raito shook his head in exasperation before going to the door.

TAP! TAP! TAP!

"Wait, Raito-kun!" L grabbed his arm, keeping him in place with his inhuman strength. Raito quirked an eyebrow over at the skinny man, yet again, not noticing the obvious lack of undress he was in.

"Raito-kun must put a shirt on first." L's eyes narrowed as Raito blinked down at his still very naked upper body. "Nobody else may look at Raito-kun in this state but me. Anyone else that attempts to will have their eyes gouged out in a most painful manner."

A weird grimace settled on Raito's face as L's countenance contorted into one of silent rage.

'Stupid idiots who don't know how to back off of what is mine…'

It was pretty obvious who he was thinking about.

Raito sweat dropped as he grabbed a random black tee-shirt from one of his many drawers and pulling it quickly over his head. They both walked out of the room, one man curious while the other steamed in anger at being interrupted in his groping session of manly sexiness.

Blue balls, indeed.

* * *

Raito sighed as Ryuuzaki stayed glued to his side, looking ready to maul whoever it was at the door. 'And they tell me I need to get fucked!' Raito thought in irritation.

'_Well, at least he's not living in the world of ancient denial. You know you wanted it just as bad as him, if not worst._'

'… … … … … shut the fuck up.'

'_No._'

Now, if only the small voice invading Raito's brain hadn't had sounded so cheerful as it spouted out that no, maybe Raito wouldn't have been as twitchy.

Then again, Raito was always twitchy, so what the hell did he know?

Raito opened the door, blinking as he didn't notice anyone within eye sight.

And then he looked down.

"RRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-CCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN!!"

SUPER GLOMP TO END ALL GLOMPS!

"MISA MISSED YOU SOOOOOOOOOOO MUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH!"

Raito tried to grasp for breath as a bubbly gothic blonde in pig tails clutched onto his waist, nuzzling his chest fondly. "Did Rai-chan miss Misa-Misa as much as Misa-Misa missed Rai-chan?!"

Raito sweat dropped once again.

"Err… I guess…?"

"YAYZ!"

Oh, one more crazy person to add to the never ending mix.

Misa jumped off of Raito and bounced up and down, her amply bosom jiggling in the process. Really, the girl had no self-control whatsoever.

Why was he friends with her again?

Molten amber eyes cropped over with blonde bangs then turned towards the other person in the apartment. Ryuuzaki stared back at the young woman unblinkingly, automatically going into his 'I'm freaky, so you should be frightened' mode, obviously wondering just who the hell this vivacious woman was.

Too bad scary stares didn't work with Misa… or else Raito would have gotten rid of her a loooooooong time ago.

"Oh My God, Rai-chan is this your NEW BOYFRIEND?!" The shrilly voice dramatically stated as Misa rudely gawked at the other man.

Ryuuzaki blinked.

Raito sighed.

There really was no escape… where was a bomb shelter when you needed one?

"… Yes, Misa." Raito hesitantly answered, leading them all to the vacant living room. "This… is my new boyfriend, Ryuuzaki." Raito painstakingly answered as he hung his head. "Ryuuzaki, this is my… friend, Amane Misa. We've known each other for a couple of years, now."

Misa critically examined the man in question, trying to deem her worthy of her Rai-chan…

Yet, still, nothing was really clicking in the 'Worthy' department in the ditzy blonde's head. Raito could already tell by the spazzy frown forming around her painted blood red lips. The girl let her thoughts be visible to the whole world, and really, that was just Misa in a nut shell.

An unbelievably hot and ditzy blonde who acted dumb for the whole world to see.

"Yup! Misa was Raito's model for a project he had to do in college! We've been bestest-best-friends ever since!" Misa grinned, holding this information over Ryuuzaki's head, as if the other man knew better than to not care.

And knowing Ryuuzaki as he did now…

"And now who has yet to let me get laid, thanks to your, I suspect, perfectly timed entrances." Ryuuzaki mumbled lightly to himself.

He would just have to add his two cents in.

And it just so happens that Misa was not deaf.

"Heeeeyyyyyyyyy!" Misa glared at the skinny man as his thumb landed on his mouth. "What do you mean by that, you big pervert! I don't have anything to do with Rai-chan's sex life! Or yours, for that matter!"

'When even Misa can tell you're perverted,' Raito thought to himself as idiot number one and idiot number two continued to glare (or stare in Ryuuzaki's case) at each other, 'then you need to ask yourself if you need Jesus.'

And this was coming from the spokesperson of Atheism.

"We were alone by ourselves in the apartment." Ryuuzaki blankly stated. "If I really have to explain myself anymore to you, then you're a bigger idiot than I thought. And that is saying something, since I thought you were pretty much a moron to begin with."

Ah yes, the social retard strikes again.

"Raitooooooooooooooo, make him stop!" Misa begged as she clung to the auburn-haired man's arm.

Ryuuzaki glared.

'_Possessive, aren't we?_'

'Didn't I tell you to shut up ten minutes ago?!'

'_Muahahahaha! Yes, but I did say no, didn't I? And don't you know that talking to yourself makes you crazy, 'Rai-chan?'''_

If Raito started to giggled insanely to himself, he only had everyone else to blame.

"You are annoying." Ryuuzaki bluntly stated as he ripped Raito away from Misa's grip and held him possessively to himself. "Therefore I have concluded that your presence is no longer required. I'm sure you know Raito's number to call him at a later time. And by later, I mean much later, when I am not trying to get off."

Misa's face turned red as she stomped her foot onto the ground, ready to tackle the man head first, before Raito finally cut in. "Misa, how about we go out tomorrow instead?"

The young woman's face instantly brightened, instantly forgetting about the rage she was about to unleash onto the man still holding onto HER best friend.

"Really?! That'd be great! We do have so much to catch up about…" Misa then glowered at Ryuuzaki. "Apparently."

Ryuuzaki's eyes narrowed in displeasure as Raito was once again caught in the middle. Raito nervously chuckled as Ryuuzaki leaned his head onto the younger man's shoulder. Jeez, personal boundaries much?

"Of course, I'll meet you at the same place as always. See you later?"

The plea went unnoticed as Misa flipped her hair over her shoulder and stuck her tongue out at Ryuuzaki. Raito's eye twitched as he felt his 'boyfriend' nuzzle his shoulder. Raito pulled himself out of the embrace of steel and guided Misa to the door, ignoring the way she continued to glare at the man on her way out the door.

Misa turned to Raito, smiling slightly as the young man flushed. "Raito has to be kidding."

The girl really wasn't as stupid as everyone thought.

Obnoxious, definitely. An air-head, undoubtedly. But stupid? No… at least, not completely stupid, anyways.

"C'mon, he's not that bad. You just caught him when he's in one of his…moods." Raito whispered to the blonde. She rolled her eyes, smirking. "Misa guesses love definitely makes you blind, then. Though I wouldn't have guessed that Raito of all people would have fallen into that game."

Eye twitch.

'Love…? I don't think we're **that **serious yet...'

"Misa will see you tomorrow, and hopefully you will not have been raped by then. Ryuuzaki-san definitely looks antsy!" Misa giggled as she finally marched out of the apartment, leaving a very confused artist in her wake, long blonde hair dancing out of sight.

'I never said anything about love.' Raito thought sullenly to himself as he finally shut the door and double locked it.

Really, the girl had a way of making the poor artist even more perplexed than he already was.

Raito shook his head as he entered the living room once again, blinking at the form resting on his couch. Ryuuzaki pouted as he sat in his now signature way, his shoes now off of his feet. A thumb rested on his lips as he stared onto the hardwood floor. "Ryuuzaki?"

"I am afraid to begin any intimate touching with Raito-kun now. I feel we will be interrupted once again, and by someone much more irritating than the last." Raito rolled his eyes as he laughed to himself. He let the bafflement he felt go into the back of his head as he sat down next to the man, throwing an arm over the other's shoulders.

Ryuuzaki still continued to pout.

"Is this you playing hard to get, now?" Raito jokingly asked the older man. Ryuuzaki's mouth trembled slightly. "So if I were to say I wanted you to fuc-OOMPH!"

Raito's ass was really starting to hate the floor.

Maple brown eyes blinked as Ryuuzaki's lips lay centimeters apart from his own. "Well, that didn't take you very long, now did it? You didn't even let me finish the damn sentence."

"I simply must take Raito-kun when he offers it. Otherwise, we shall never get anywhere." Ryuuzaki smirked.

"So I was 'offering' myself to you earlier when you ambushed me in my own bedroom?"

"Raito-kun shouldn't parade around in just his pants then… though it would have probably been more enjoyable if his pants had been off."

"… just shut up and kiss me, you anorexic weirdo."

"Will d-"

"**She bangs, she bangs! Oh baby when she moves, she moves-" **The obnoxious cell phone strikes again, vibrating innocently from his bedroom.

"Ignore it?"

"Uh, am I getting up?" Ryuuzaki shook his head vehemently. "Then I guess so."

Ryuuzaki dove once more, before-

"But really Raito-kun, Ricky Martin? That's just so-mmph!"

"_**I go crazy 'cause she looks like a flower, but she stings like a bee-Like every girl in history!"**_

"And Ryuuzaki?" Raito panted in between fervent kisses.

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"I wasn't kidding when I said you wouldn't be getting any tonight."

Thunk!

Raito laughed as L fell off to the side, looking quite like the dedragled puppy he pretended to be at times.

The dark-haired man was just so much fun to tease.

* * *

Disclaimer: Ricky Martin strikes again! Muahahaha! I do not own "She Bangs" by Ricky 'I'msogay,butwon'tadmitit!' Martin. Seriously dude... just stop it.

Yes! Fear my awesome updating skillz! They pwn all! XD Told you I'd be back soon. Lol! So... likey the chaptey? And now, Misa has come into the picture. Oh, how I can picture the Misa-haters now... poor girl. She also deserves more love if you ask me. ((hopes she won't be hung from a tree)) Ditzy and annoyingly funny; just the right combo to be included in this story! Reviews for this poor chapter? Yes, no, maybe so?


	11. And The Safety Word Is?

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Eleven: _And The Safety Word Is?_

* * *

'This is nice...'

That was Raito's first thought as he began to enter the world of awareness. Lingering dreams poured from his mind as Raito attempted to clutch onto the pleasant thoughts.

'Hmm...' Raito hummed to himself as he buried himself deeper within his haven of multiple pillows. A warmth radiated from beside the young man, making him twitch slightly in his light sleep. He snuggled in deeper, wishing the thoughts would stop rapidly running through his mind so he could just fall back to sleep, his muddled mind unwittingly filling itself with a sudden groggy attachment to the world around the young man. Something was wrong, but Raito just couldn't put his finger on it...

'_Well, here's a thought: Since when do your pillows __**breathe**__, you idiot?_'

And blissful ignorance really couldn't last forever.

The 23-year-old's chestnut brown eyes snapped open as he cautiously turned to his right and looked at his fantastically live pillow, only to be faced with wide ebony eyes and a somewhat perverted grin.

"HOLY FUCK!"

Today was not heading off to a good start so far for poor Yagami Raito.

Raito almost jumped out of the bed, but quickly stopped himself for two reasons.

1. The creepy smile on the mega-pervert's face said that was exactly what he wanted him to do.

2. Adjacent to reason number 1: He was fucking NAKED!

Eye Twitch of Ominous DEATH!

"Ryuuzaki..." Raito began calmly, trying to regulate his breathing so that he didn't have a sudden panic attack. "Why are you in my bed... staring at me like I'm a piece of meat... most likely naked? And most importantly, above all else... WHERE THE HELL ARE MY PANTS?!"

So much for not having a panic attack.

Good bye good health, hello high blood pressure!

"Those are very good questions, Raito-kun..." Ryuuzaki tilted his head in a cute manner, and purposely bared a bit of his naked shoulder to the spazzing artist. "Do you not remember what happened the night before?"

Raito blinked.

"Uh..."

Ryuuzaki pouted.

"Raito-kun does not remember the beautiful evening we had?!"

Raito blinked again.

Ryuuzaki sniffled dramatically... though Raito suspected that was just his way of trying to make him feel guilty in some way.

Too bad guilty looks didn't coincide with naked perverts lying on the exasperated artist's bed.

"Well, if Raito-kun does not remember, I suppose we will have to create **new **memories to take it's place." Ryuuzaki's eyes gleamed predatorily at Raito, a light sweat forming on the back of his neck. Bare thighs came in contact with each other as Raito's eyes widened to the point of falling out, both of their faces merely millimeters apart.

And that is when rational thought finally entered Raito's brain from it's slightly long hiatus. Suppressed images began to pop up in the young man's memory banks, giving him glimpses into the night before...

"HOLD ON ONE FLIPPING SECOND!" Raito panickedly pushed the other man off of him, sending the creepy pervert spiraling over the other side of the bed and onto the hardwood floor.

Raito winced at the sound.

"... ... ... Ow."

The artist thought back on the night before, trying desperately to grasp onto to the foggy memories that seemed buried beneath the muddled vestiges of his mind.

'_Oh, this should be fun..._'

Raito sweat dropped.

* * *

_"Does Raito-kun have anything to drink?" Ryuuzaki asked the tranquil 23 year old who's head lay on his lap. Both were staring at the television, watching the 10:00 p.m. news broadcast. It had been a couple hours since Misa's departure, and things had settled down magnificently between the two men. _

_"Yeah. I have Orange Juice, bottled water, milk or diet soda." Raito ignored the cringe Ryuuzaki sent his way at the mention of sugarless soda. "What would you like?"_

_'Is you, naked on the floor while I bang you continuously, an option?'_

_"... I was thinking something a bit more adult, if Raito-kun doesn't mind." Raito blinked lazily, rubbing the sleepiness out of his eyes as he got off of Ryuuzaki's lap. "I think I have some wine. Would you like some of that?"_

_Ryuuzaki nodded without hesitation. _

_Raito walked into his kitchen, slightly worried about Ryuuzaki's strange demeanor, but shrugging it off. The young man grabbed two wine glasses along with the bottle itself and walked back into the living room, no noticing the smirk that lay on the thin man's face. He poured the wine into both glasses and handed one to Ryuuzaki while keeping one for himself._

_"To tomorrow morning?"_

_Raito gave Ryuuzaki a strange look before clinking glasses with the bizarre gentleman. "I... guess?"_

_The 23 year old did not like that look on Ryuuzaki's face at all. _

_'Oh god, he's sexing me up with his eyes... __**again**__!" The young man shivered, a foreboding feeling crawling up his spine. _

_'Why do I feel like I just walked into an over sized bear trap?'_

_**Several, Several Drinks Later...**_

_"Raito-kun is officially drunk."_

_"Am (hic) not!"_

_"Then why is Raito-kun attempting to stand on his head?" _

_"Because it's (hic) fun?"_

_"... ... ... I think Raito-kun has had a little __**too**__ much to drink." _

_"Noooooooooo..."_

_"Let us take you to bed, Raito-kun."_

_Smirk._

_"So you can have your wicked way with me?"_

_"No, so that Raito-kun may rest."_

_"But-"_

_"Please, Raito-kun, you need your-"_

_Pull. _

_Throw. _

_"Raito-kun, please put your shirt back on."_

_"Ne-(hic)-ver!"_

_Sigh._

_"Raito-kun."_

_Tug._

_Pull. _

_Strip._

_O.O_

_"Look, Ryuuzaki! NO PANTS! WHEE!"_

_O.O_

_O.O_

_O.O_

_O.O_

_"Why, oh why, must Raito-kun do this to me while he is inebriated?"_

_"Tee hee. (hic)"_

_Fist clench._

_"Please, Raito-kun, stop dancing like that."_

_"I think (hic) Ryuu-chan looks better without pants, too! (hic)"_

_"Gah!"_

_Tug._

_Tug._

_Pull. _

_"And there goes my shirt."_

_"(giggle) (hic)"_

_Tug. _

_Tug. _

_"Raito-kun, please restrain yourself."_

_"Aw... isn't this what Ryuuzaki wants?"_

_Sigh... again. "Not like this, Raito-kun."_

_"Please..."_

_Tug. _

_Tug._

_Pull._

_O.O;;;_

_XD_

_"Wow... I'd almost forgotten how hung you (hic) are."_

_"Indeed."_

_"Hm... I don't think (hic) I'll be forgetting any time soon."_

_"Is Raito-kun satisfied now?"_

_"No."_

_Triple Super Fantastic Sigh._

_"Ryuuzaki?"_

_"Yes, Raito-kun?"_

_"I think I like you... a lot."_

_"Thank you, Raito-kun. I like you as well."_

_"Ryuuzaki?"_

_"__**Yes**__, Raito-kun?"_

_"I think I'm going to kiss you now."_

_"Raito-kun is not in his right mind at the moment." _

_"But I want tooooooo."_

_"Now he is sounding like an idiot. Therefore we should not proceed."_

_"But, Ryuuzaki..."_

_Innocently Cute Pout of DOOM!_

_"... ... ... one kiss."_

_"Yay!"_

_GLOMP!_

_"Err..."_

_"This feels nice! (hic)"_

_"Yes, it does."_

_"Now, about Ryuu-chan's kiss..."_

_A hand lightly stroked L's face as Raito leaned forward, barely centimeters away from the other's face. Raito then shifted slightly, L groaning as their two naked sexes rubbed against each other unintentionally. Innocent mocha eyes twinkled as L grabbed the man's hips and panted for a moment, not being able to contain himself from the look on the other man's face. _

_'Even when he's drunk the boy's still damn sexy!'_

_Raito was really too hot for his own good. _

_Lips then gently pressed against his own as Raito's hand began to mysteriously trail down from L's pale chest, a shivering raking down the older man's body as he did so._

_Oh, if only L had been paying more attention to the rambuctious hand and what it was about to do. _

_Soft fingers lightly caressed L's erection, making the man stiffen (in more ways than one) in shock. The hand firmly gripped the hard rod, slowly beginning to pump the man's almost painfully hard shaft. _

_L was liking Raito drunk._

_The anonymous artist let one hand leave Raito's side, delving it into the locks of hair surrounding Raito's flushed face as he pulled his head even closer to his own. L flipped them both over, dominating the kiss completely. Gasps escaped the younger man's otherwise preoccupied mouth as L began to reach out and grab hold of Raito's own hardening member, when a breathless moan stopped him in his tracks. _

_"Ryuuzaki..."_

_Something in the older man deflated at the otherwise sexy groan. _

_'But...' a small voice whispered pleadingly in L's head. 'He's WILLING! And... and...'_

_L sighed. _

_Nothing was worse than your lover calling out another's name while doing the deed... even if he didn't know otherwise. _

_He pushed Raito's hand away from his member and pulled both Raito and himself up from off the floor, ignoring the lethal pout on the other's face. _

_It was time for bed. _

* * *

"You..." Raito's pink cheeks flushed even more as he remembered the events from the night before. "I..."

Ryuuzaki leaned back onto the mattress, watching the younger man try to assimilate the memories from the night before.

Raito was so cute when he was embarrassed.

"Why..." Raito buried himself in the sheets, refusing to look at Ryuuzaki's face. "Did you stop?"

The older man's smirk completely fell off his face.

"I would never take advantage of Raito-kun while he was drunk."

The look on the younger artist's face could cut through steel.

"Really now?"

"Of course. That would be disrespectful. Besides, it is not my fault Raito-kun cannot hold his liquor. Especially wine of all things." Raito's blush intensified, making his cheeks look like radiated candles. "Now, are we going to continue what we started last night, or is Raito-kun going to pull his 'prude' act. Because from those items I found in Rai-chan's closet, I can definitely say it's an act."

The pervy grin returns with a vengeance!

"And what the hell were you doing in my closet?!" Raito exclaimed. Ryuuzaki blinked.

"Looking through your things. Why else would I go into Raito-kun's closet?"

THUMP!

Raito sighed as he felt the bump form from behind his head, the headboard behind him shaking from the sudden impact.

"Raito-kun sure does hurt himself a lot." Ryuuzaki hummed out as he leaned forward, hand creeping out from underneath the covers. "Perhaps he requires first aid?"

Raito felt his eye twitch once more. "Ryuuzaki, get your hand of my thigh. I hit my head, not my crotch."

"But Raito-kun..." The dark-haired man pouted indignantly.

"No... not until you tell me why you **_really _**couldn't go through with what you did the night before." Raito's eyes narrowed as Ryuuzaki shirked his hand away from his blanketed skin, a pensieve look overcoming his face. "Why, indeed..."

"I suppose," Ryuuzaki began suddenly, "That it is better to tell you now than later. I believe if we wish to get anywhere, this bit of information would be hard to hide."

Raito's eye brow quirked up.

"Raito-kun does not know a lot about me, except for small things that I have deemed worthy for him to know." Ryuuzaki leaned forward, Raito's anticipation getting the best of him as he waited for the man to continue. Neither the door silently open, a pair of wide sepia eyes peeking in on it's occupants. "But this, I shall tell him now, and hopefully he shall believe me. The reason I could not take advantage of Raito, is because I could not become intimate with him until I disclosed with him my true identi-"

"RAI-CHAN!!"

SISTERLY GLOMP!

"GAH!"

"Wha-?"

"You finally got some action! CONGRATULATIONS!"

Sweat drop.

"Sayu... how the hell did you get in?" Sayu smiled, jumping off the uncomfortable (and still naked) man and holding up a pair of keys in front of Raito's face. "I made a copy yesterday after I left! Now, I can come and see onii-chan anytime I want! Aren't you excited?"

Double sweat drop.

"Oh, joy of joys..."

"But enough of that! You two did the deed! You finally got rid of some sexual tension! You both cha-cha-cha'd all night long! You-"

"Ok, Sayu? Shut the hell up."

"But-!"

"Really. Just... shut the hell up."

Sayu pouted as Ryuuzaki simply stared at the girl with wide eyes. "I am afraid that Sayu-chan is incorrect."

"EHHHHHHHHHHH!?" The inhuman shriek almost brought the apartment building down as Raito winced in discomfort.

Why Ryuuzaki had to go and tell his little sister that, Raito didn't want to know.

"We did not do the 'deed,' nor did we 'cha-cha-cha.'"

"But I basically handed him to you on a silver platter, Ryuuzaki-san! Oh no... now I have to think of a new scheme to get my brother some lovin'! Do you realize how difficult it is to trick this guy sometimes? It's almost as if he DOESN'T want to get laid!"

"HEY!"

"I'm sure we will do better next time, Sayu-chan."

"Yeah..."

"I AM STILL RIGHT HERE, YA KNOW!"

"But... if you two didn't have sex... why are you both...?"

"Hmmm... that's a good question, Sayu-chan. Would you like to know about how we passed the night?"

"Are you retarded?! OF COURSE!" Sayu jumped on the bed, both her and Ryuuzaki looking as if they were at a slumber party and ready to confide all the sordid details of their sex lives to one another.

"Ryuuzaki, if you tell her anything about what we did, I can most definitely guaran-damn-tee you will never get any sex of any kind from me... EVER!"

"... ... ...Party pooper."

"I concur."

Raito sighed painfully.

"Oh this day just cannot get any worse..."

_**"Fergalicious! (So delicious) But I ain't promiscuous, and if you was suspicious; All that shit is fictitious!" **_

SUPER THUNK!

_**"I blow kisses! (mmmwwahhh) That puts them boys on rock, rock, and they be line'n down the block just to watch what I got- (four, tres, two, uno)"**_

Sayu's giggling and Ryuuzaki's muffled chuckles were not helping his bruised ass and ego.

"I hate you all."

_**"So delicious! (It's hot, hot) So delicious! (I put them boys on rock, rock) So delicious! (they wanna slice of what I got) Fergalicious! (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)" **_

* * *

Disclaimer: Nope, don't own "Fergalicious" by Fegie. I wonder if she thinks she's clever? Oh, I hope not...

Did anyone notice that L is his own worst cock blocker? Lol! He has no one to blame but himself this time. Next chapter shall be da bomb... and no, I don't mean literally. Reviews, anybody care to leave any reviews? XD


	12. You Against Me Against The World

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twelve: _You Against Me Against The World_

* * *

"Sayu, pass me my damn cell phone." 'You evil, maniacal bitch' was what Raito wished to tack on at the end of the sentence, but Sayu would most likely take that as a compliment.

She was truly sick in every sense of the word.

The young girl smiled slyly as she pranced over to where the phone lay on his bureau and picked it up gingerly.

_**"Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def-def-def-def-def-def-"**_

"SAYU!"

"Alright already, jeez!" Sayu rolled her eyes as she tossed the phone over to her scandalously nude brother (who was barely hanging onto the blanket by a thread) and skipped back to Ryuuzaki, who grinned awkwardly at her.

Did Raito mention the other man was just as naked as himself?

'Nope, that isn't creepy in the slightest. Now if I could only pretend Sayu wasn't in the room with us, I'd probably be halfway alright...' Raito blithely thought to himself as he glanced at the number.

Only to want to kill himself afterwards.

This was the morning from Hell, and the angelically handsome artist was quite sure the apocalypse was most likely lying just around the corner.

'And that would be the good part of the day!' Raito's mind screamed in frustration as the young man restrained the urge to bang his head against the wall.

He was really too good looking for all of this.

'Do I really have to answer...? It couldn't be that hard to ignore-'

_**"T to the A, to the S-T-E-Y - girl, you're tasty, T to the A to the S-T-E-Y - girl, you're tasty D to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S, to the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, hit it Fergie!"**_

'Oh, fuck it!'

"Hello?!"

Oh, please let this be a wrong number and completely different person with the same name.

"Raito-sama!"

The 23-year-old artist winced painfully. This was not going to end well...

"Mikami-kun..."

For him.

CRASH!

Sayu blinked in shock as Ryuuzaki somehow managed to get from the bed to the ground, blanket no longer protecting his completely naked figure.

"... ... ... ... Damn, Rai-chan. You got lucky."

Raito sweat dropped as Ryuuzaki's legs stuck up in the air, letting it all... er... 'hang out.'

"How have you been? I... er... haven't seen you lately?"

"Oh, I've been around..."

Raito's eyes bugged out of their sockets as the mysterious reply set him on edge. 'Been around?'

That was pretty much Mikami Code for 'I've Been Videotaping You While You've Been Sleeping... And Most Likely Masturbating Whilst Watching the Videos!'

Oh, if only that wasn't completely plausible...

Because really, it wouldn't be the first time.

"I've missed you so much, Raito-sama. Have you missed me?"

"I... guess?"

"KYAAAAAA! RAITO-SAMA MISSED ME!!"

Leg Twitch.

Oh, Ryuuzaki definitely heard that.

Raito sighed as the older man's leg spasmed, Sayu still staring in awe at the awesomeness of Ryuuzaki's... well, you know.

Kinda old news to a guy who basically fondled it's greatness already. Nevermind him being drunk, he'd actually gotten to _touch it_...

His hand was officially made of epic win.

"Dear God, is that even possible...?" Sayu whispered flabbergasted.

But if his sister was going to say things like that, then she needed to leave, and now!

'Grr...'

"Raito-sama! Are you doing anything today? Or are you seeing anyone in particular? Because I'm ok with that! I would totally stop what I was doing later on if it means you'll be free later on! Or now! Or a little after now! Or little before later! Whichever you prefer!"

Raito sweat dropped. His mind went at a complete standstill at the question.

"Well, you see I-"

'What to say, what to say, what to say-'

"Have to go see..."

'Damn it, Brain! Don't shut down on me now!'

"Err..."

'Fucking cock sucker, this is not the time to go blank!'

Raito opened his mouth, ready to spew out some half-assed lie, when the phone was snatched from him. The man blinked, looking down at his now empty hand before glancing in the direction the phone had been taken.

Ryuuzaki had taken the cell phone.

DEAR GOD, RYUUZAKI HAD TAKEN THE FUCKING CELL PHONE!

And this was where the apocalypse really needed to come knocking on his door.

Sayu just continued to stare at Ryuuzaki's crotch in complete and utter astonishment.

"Stop calling my boyfriend, you annoying, wanna-be Johnny Cockran. I hate you, the whole world hates you, and your mother gives blow jobs to the milkman next store. So go kill yourself."

Click.

Raito stared at the man, not quite sure he was grateful or not.

"Isn't Johnny Cockran black?" Sayu asked, finally coming out of her huge-penis induced stupor. Ryuuzaki shrugged, a blank look carefully constructed on his face. "Does it matter?"

"Well, can it be considered racist that you just told an Asian man that he basically wants to be both African American and a good liar? Or that you just told a Japanese man in particular to go kill himself... especially after WWII and the whole 'Samurai' thing?" The young girl scratched her head as she glanced up at the ceiling in deep thought.

"Maybe. But who cares?"

And that was all she wrote...

For that debate, anyway.

"Now, if you don't mind Sayu...?" Raito nodded towards the door, trying to get the girl out as soon as possible. No sooner had he done so, two identical perverted grins rose from the ashes, making Raito's eye automatically twitch in both agony and pain.

Oh, what he put up with.

"Oh... I don't mind. Not. One. Bit." Sayu turned around, and bounced out of the room, her light steps resonating within the small passageways of his apartment. "But Raito?" The young girl called out, presumably at the door.

The young artist was scared to actually answer back.

"Yes, Sayu?"

But he was a trooper. Only ugly cowards with no spines got scared of little nineteen year old brats.

"You may wanna pick up the living room! There are clothes and wine glasses scattered everywhere! Don't want people actually thinking you were relieving some of that sexual tension, now do we?"

Whap!

He really needed a softer head board.

Slam!

"How many times do I have to tell her to not slam that damn door?" Raito muttered to himself as he began to climb out of bed, not noticing the avid stare of one local, wide eyed pervert. The 23 year old stretched lightly and yawned, picking out some clothes from his multitude of dressers, ignoring the leers thrown in his direction. He then turned to Ryuuzaki, who was practically drooling on his bed (He was so going to have to change those sheets tonight) and quirked an eyebrow. "I'm going to take a shower. I'll let you join if only under one condition: Can you manage to restrain yourself, or is that too much for you?"

The older man looked as if he had died and gone to heaven ten times over.

"Raito-kun is certainly not being shy anymore." Ryuuzaki observed as his eyes raked in Raito's naked form.

Definitely perfect in every way.

"Well, there's kind of no reason to be. You've seen it already, haven't you? Continuously. Besides, I have nothing to be embarrassed about."

Hair flip.

Perfected smile.

Raito was definitely the epitome of manipulative egotistical bastards who also happened to look like Sex Gods.

But what the hell did Ryuuzaki care? This was the closest thing to action he suspected was gonna get today!

"Are you coming?"

Ryuuzaki grinned at Raito's retreating backside.

'Definitely Raito-licious...'

"Oh, I hope so."

Sweat drop.

* * *

"Raito-kun could have at least given up a blow job."

The young man's patented _Special Death Glare of Doom_™ was Raito's only response to the irritating statement.

"I am just saying..."

"Well, **I** am just saying that we had already confirmed that you were supposed to restrain yourself in the damn shower, not attempt to molest me while I'm trying to get clean. Not once did I say I was going to get you off."

"That is another point. You were quite willing to last night."

"I was quite DRUNK OUT OF MY MIND last night!"

"Hmph. I think I like that Raito-kun much better. **He** would not let me die of sexual frustration."

Raito rolled his eyes, his aggravation at the conversation topic showing quite thoroughly.

"Well then, would you like me to suck your dick now or later."

"Really?!"

"... ... ... No."

"Raito-kun is no longer on my friend's list."

"What?"

"Exactly."

"You make absolutely no sense sometimes, Ryuuzaki."

"I know. And Raito-kun likes me all the more for it. Isn't that what you told me last night? And I quote: "Ryuuzaki? I think I like you... a lot." And end quote."

Raito blushed madly as the older man stared at him with wide, unblinking eyes.

"Besides the fact I'm about 95 percent sure that I said that whilst I was completely inebriated, that statement is only partially true."

Ryuuzaki blinked.

"Why does Raito-kun say that?"

Mocha brown eyes softened immensely, concentrating now on the floor below them. "It's... it's a little hard to say you like someone, when you barely know anything about them. Anything substantial, anyway."

The strained silence that hung over the room nearly suffocated it's occupants.

"Raito-kun..." Ryuuzaki shoved his hands in the flannel pant's pockets, courtesy of Raito. His hunched disposition straightened, his just barely managing to tower the younger of the two. Raito blinked at the slight, but sudden height difference, but didn't comment on it.

"What was it you were going to tell me in the bedroom, Ryuuzaki?" Raito's soft voice rang throughout the insufferable silence, giving the air in the room a certain chill. Ryuuzaki sighed before stepping forward, placing a hand on the artist's slender hips, seemingly gathering his multitude of thoughts.

"In the bedroom..." Ryuuzaki whispered softly before nodding to himself. "Raito-kun, what I was going to tell you in your room, before we were so rudely interrupted, is-"

_**"It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.! It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.!"**_

"Fucking Hell!"

And that wasn't even Raito for once.

**_"They have everything for young men to enjoy, you can hang out with all the boys..."_**

Ryuuzaki stalked away from the stunned man, going into his room and picking up the cell phone, nearly breaking it from the forceful way he snapped it open.

**_"It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.! It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.!"_**

L didn't even look at the name displayed on the screen before accepting the call.

"WHAT?!"

Silence was heard, until...

"Ryuuzaki-kun?"

L blushed madly as his boyfriend's (Official! It was... going to be Official eventually, damn it!) mother answered the from the other line. "Sachiko-san..."

"I take it this is a bad time?"

"Uh... I deeply apologize, I just thought-"

"It's quite alright, Ryuuzaki-kun! You sound as if you and my son have a lot on your minds. I'll just call back later."

L face faulted in shame.

"But-"

"I'll see you later!"

Click.

Now he just felt like a jack-ass.

"Ryuuzaki?"

Crap.

Before L could put down the phone and go back out into the living room of ultimate DOOM AND DESTRUCTION!, he was then unjustly hit with a double whammy. (Get it? Whammy?)

_**"(I said) Its gettin hot in here! (so hot) So take off all your clothes! (eh)"**_

L's eye twitched as the phone vibrated within the bone crushing grip of his hand.

_**"I am gettin so hot; I wanna take my clothes off!"**_

Unlike the last time, L gently flipped open the monstrous contraption, but still did not look at the name on the screen, as he quickly accepted the call, wanting nothing more than to just get it over with.

"Hello?"

"RAI-CHAN! IT'S MISA-MISA! YOU ANSWERED MISA'S PHONE CALL ON THE FIRST TWO RINGS FOR THE FIRST TIME EVAR! YAYZ!"

And then promptly wished he had not answered so calmly.

"... ... ... You are so annoying."

Click.

L then turned the damn phone off and called it day.

Unlike Raito, he could only deal with so much without breaking something.

'Now, to face the inevitable wrath of said sexy ass man... Mmmm... sexy ass...'

L obviously also had different priorities than the manic brunette. Such as getting some action.

"Ryuuzaki, who was it calling?" The brown eyed man stared as Ryuuzaki strolled back in the living room, but did not answer him. Raito gaped as the dark haired weirdo grabbed him by the arms and pulled him onto the couch and sat him down.

"Raito-kun needs to shut up and listen, because who knows how much time I will actually have to be able to say this without someone interrupting me." Ryuuzaki kneeled down in front of the gorgeous misanthrope, a small breath escaping his pale lips. He did not hesitate in his next words, which would then begin the next step in their convoluted courtship.

"I... am L."

Raito stared wide eyed at the no longer anonymous artist for a second... and then two.

Two then turned to three seconds, then four...

"Raito-kun?" Ryuuzaki breathed out slightly, a small tick forming in his eyebrow.

Still nothing.

Ryuuzaki poked the man in the forehead.

Raito didn't even respond.

"Er... will Raito-kun at least blink so that his eyes do not dry out? Staring without blinking like that is an acquired skill, you know."

Not even an annoyed twitch.

Ryuuzaki sweat dropped once again.

* * *

Sayu was a very punctual person, and hated to be otherwise. Really, it was a Yagami trait that was handed down very carefully, if nothing else.

It was also most likely the only thing both her and brother had in common.

As Sayu entered the small restaurant, she searched for the two women in question, smirking as she found them rather quickly, before rushing towards the nearest vacant seat.

Blonde hair pulled up pigtails swayed slightly as sepia eyes lit up in glee. "Sayu-chan!"

The older woman across from her smiled gently at the young girl, her dark hair brushed aside by thin fingers. "Sayu."

"Hey okaa-san! Hey Misa!"

Sayu sat down, all three of the women's eyes gleaming in the artificial light of the restaurant they were huddled in.

'Oh, onii-chan, you are so screwed... whether you like it or not!'

Raito really wouldn't know what hit him by the time these three women were through with him.

* * *

Disclaimer: I promise I do not own "YMCA" by The Village People, nor do I own "Hot in Herre" by Nelly. 'Discordant Harmony,' where no song is safe from my dutiful wrath! XD

You guys crack me up in your reviews. I mostly get 3 types of comments, and this is just generalizing them, by the way: 1. 'I HATE SAYU! SHE MUST DIEEEEEE!' 2. 'KYYYYYAAAAA! I LOVE SAYU! SHE'S THE BESTEST!' And the most popular... 3. When shall the sexing up commence? We need it NOOOOOOOOOOOOW! XD Too funny. If Sayu annoys you, she's then doing her job, if you love her, awesome, and the sexing up? I refuse to say a word... at least for now. Reviews would be nice, ya know... Motivation, maybe? Lol!


	13. When All Else Fails

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Thirteen: _When All Else Fails_

* * *

If this wasn't complete and total shock, Raito didn't know what was.

Here was Raito's first thought, once Ryuuzaki (Now known as L. L? What The Fuck?! REALLY?!) uttered those three comatose-inducing words and caused him to almost spontaneously shit on himself.

'Did I smoke something I wasn't supposed to last night?'

Yeah, so very thought provoking, indeed.

Then, as the Shock of The Century began to wear off, slightly more suitable thoughts for the situation at hand began to invade his cranial spectrum.

'OMGHEJUSTSAIDHE'SL!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!OMG!WTF!WTF!WTF!WTF!WTF!FTW!FTW!FTW!FTW!FTW!OMFGTENTIMESOVER!!GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! ((Raito's brain begins to implode on itself))'

Apparently for Raito, panic was the word of the day, with surprise chasing after it.

And that was putting it lightly.

"Raito-kun? Are you alright? You are actually beginning to frighten me now." Ryuuzaki (Nope, not L. Not him at all!) stared at him with concern shining within his dark, infinite depths, Raito still not actually focusing on the... world renowned artist?

'That... that just does not ring true.'

Raito finally managed to blink out of his stupor, his eyes a bit bloodshot from the continuous staring, and tried to focus his mind on the words that were still coming out of Ryuu-I mean, L-no, he definitely meant Ryuuzaki-Oh, fuck it! The dark haired anorexic with freakishly large eyes. (And huge penis. Did Raito mention that, too?)

"Is this..." The 23 year old finally began speaking, ignoring the abrupt stop of the other man's voice, trying to grasp a hold on what he, himself was going to say. "Another weird ploy to get me to have sex with you?"

Raito would not doubt it in the least, for some strange reason.

"No, Raito-kun. It is not... I gather from your reaction that you both do not believe this nor do you believe I am actually the anonymous artist, which no one has actually has ever seen, named L." Raito blinked stupidly as L put his thumb to his lips and stared up at the ceiling above them.

It didn't take a genius to figure that out.

"Would Raito-kun care for me to demonstrate the fact that I am, indeed, who I say I am?"

"Uh..." Raito's brain was still not up to it's usual par. "Ok?"

"Splendid." L (might as well call him that, the weirdo) grabbed his cell phone from his pocket with his strange two finger grip and flipped it open without another word. He pushed a couple of buttons and then held the phone as close to his ear as he could get without actually making any contact with the contraption.

Dear God, the man was stranger than he thought.

"Ah, Aizawa. I am going to need you to come and pick both Raito-kun and I from his apartment. We are in need of transportation back to the house."

Raito sighed, as the person L was talking mumbled something incoherent, a restless look appearing on L's face as he did so.

"It's quite alright, Aizawa. I have already told him the truth."

"WWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!"

Raito sweat dropped as the yell was heard around the apartment complex...

And that was just via. cell phone.

The young man could only imagine the reactions of the occupants of that neighborhood.

A fast paced muttering came from the cell phone as L looked disinterested in the whole situation as a whole. If only Raito could show that kind of lack of feeling to everything around him...

Then life really would be perfect.

"So, you will be here in fifteen minutes, then?"

Raito shuddered as the deadly silence over the other line spoke volumes of what the other man truly wanted to say. 'Oh, the man is completely out of his loony ass mind...'

Raito heard the other person whisper something once again as L tilted his head to the side as he smiled eerily and gave his own acknowledgment to the man.

"We will be waiting for your arrival."

Click.

The phone snapped shut as L placed the phone back into his pocket, a small laughing grin encasing his features.

Raito refused to think that the smile lightened the other man's face immensely.

'Nope, not looking edible in the least...' Raito really was the King, Queen, Prince and Princess of Denial... all in one pretty, egotistical package.

"Well, I suppose we should get dressed in different clothes if we are to go outside." The perverted grin strikes again! God, did the man think of nothing else BUT sex?! "Hm... I doubt very much that Raito-kun would go out in his pajama bottoms and no shirt."

A steely gaze encaptured L's eyes.

"Nor would I want him to."

Raito really didn't think that even entertaining the idea of cheating on this man could even be considered an option. Not that he would...

The 23 year old had more respect for his health than that... especially with the way those dark eyes began to twitch so readily.

'Ok...'

"And I have to go, why...?" Raito glanced at the perverted, but possessive man, hoping he could get out of this strange outing with just the use of his sexy, sexy eyes.

No luck there. That just strengthened L's cause even further.

'For the sake of finally getting some!' Cried a small voice in the back of L's head.

L definitely supported that idea.

"I've already specified before hand that I shall prove to Raito-kun that I am who I say I am. I will show Raito-kun evidence of my true identity, and then..." Raito did not like that gleam in L's eyes. Not. One. Bit. "Raito-kun may be more inclined to finish last night's activities, this time sobe-"

Couch Pillow Slam!

'One thing's for sure,' Raito thought to himself as his eye twitched. 'Whether he's L or not, once a pervert...'

"Is that a yes?"

Raito sighed in aggravation.

'Always a pervert.'

"Raito-kun? You haven't given me an answer yet? Will I be getting to at least second base? Raito-kun?"

The 23 year old did not even deign to answer the sex-crazed man as he shook his head and made it to his room.

What a wonderful start to a crap-tastic day.

* * *

"I really don't understand why you just didn't borrow some of my clothes. You look all... rumpled."

Because that didn't sound snotty at all.

"I were prefer to look, rumpled as you say, than to take on the appearance of a flaming pirate as I would have with Raito-kun's clothing."

"Hey-"

"But it looks good on you, Raito-kun!"

The percentage of L actually getting some action tonight was steadily declining at a rapid rate, but really, who could resist such digs aimed towards the insanely perfect specimen of sexy man-meat known as Yagami Raito?

Not L, that's for sure.

Both men exited the apartment building, Raito not even blinking as the familiar Rolls Royce met his stunning gaze. A tough looking man with a gigantic jiggly afro got out of the front seat, making some sort of random gesture towards the driver before moving forward and meeting the two men halfway.

Raito could automatically tell the man was completely on edge.

'At least I'm not the only one who's uncomfortable here...'

"Does he really know...?" The older man, who Raito presumed to be this 'Aizawa,' whispered to the raccoon-eyed man next to Raito.

L nodded without question.

'Yup. An equally anxiety-ridden man with a crazy afro along with a delusional pervert with horrible posture.' Raito thought to himself as he pasted the most fake-polite smile on his chiseled face. 'Lovely.'

"Very well," Mr.Afrolicious sighed to himself before turning to Raito. He bowed slightly (most likely because of back problems concerning his dangerous hair style), a weary smile perched on his rough weathered face. "Hello, Yagami-kun. I am L's assistant, Aizawa Shuichi. It is very nice to finally meet you. L has... spoken very much about you, to be quite frank.

Raito blushed a bright magenta at the last sentence.

He could only imagine what the eccentric told the poor old man.

'I can hear it now...'

_"Aizawa! Guess what?! I totally met this dreamy guy who I want to fuck a thousand times over! His ass is so perfect, I think you can bounce a quarter off it! Tee-hee!"_

_O.O;_

_"Sure... L..."_

_Afro Jiggle of Twitchiness._

_"Yay! I love to screw guys!"_

But that was just a generalization. Who knows what actually goes on in close doors in that crazy household.

Raito bowed after a moment of silence, his smile then becoming a bit more sympathetic. He could only think of actually having to be around the big pervert ALL THE TIME!

His ass wouldn't be able to take it.

"If you'll just follow me to the car, we shall be on our way." Aizawa smiled, his afro captivating the younger man once again and climbed into the front seat, leaving the back of the car all to the two men.

'Please don't try to fondle me in front of your employees, again. Please don't try to fondle me in front of your employees, again. Please-'

"Come, Raito-kun. My home awaits."

"And that's what I'm afraid of."

Insert perverted smile and inappropriate tongue gesture here.

Raito shivered unconsciously.

'Forget whether he's L or not, just let my ass be safe today!'

Oh, how L enjoyed watching the man squirm.

* * *

_**Meanwhile, over in a restaurant not too far away...**_

"Kya! Misa-Misa thinks that's just a GREAT idea! Even if Ryuuzaki is a big poopie-head..." The young blonde pouted as she leaned forward onto the table, her cleavage practically popping out of her top. Sayu rolled her eyes as Sachiko merely giggled at the younger woman's antics. "Rai-chan definitely deserves better than him, but if he likes him so much, Misa will most definitely support him!"

"Well, I for one think Ryuuzaki is simply wonderful," Sachiko stated as she grinned motherly to the two girls. "And he is quite the perfect match for Raito, even if it appears otherwise."

"Exactly!" Sayu exclaimed loudly, leaping out of the chair in glee. Unlike Raito, she did not mind when people stared at her. In fact, she loved it. "Those two are just meant to be! All we have to do is show Raito that, and from the way he's been reacting to Ryuuzaki's advances, I don't think that'll be much of a problem."

"But if that's the case, why doesn't Rai-chan just doesn't... you know." Misa cocked her head to the side, cutely pondering the dilemma at hand. Sayu once again rolled her eyes in exasperation.

"Because he thinks he's just after his Kibbles and Bits, you dumb bimbo."

Misa playfully glared at the slightly younger girl as she smirked back at the gothic blonde. "Well, I wouldn't blame him. If Raito wasn't gay, I would totally rape him. Hell, I would rape him NOW if I got the chance! I'm just surprised the guy hasn't succeeded in laying it down on Rai-chan yet!"

"It's definitely not for lack of trying, Misa-chan." Sachiko winced at the proclamation as Sayu giggled.

"Well, it's onii-chan's own fault for being so hot, okaa-san." That really didn't help Sachiko's uncomfortableness in the slightest. "So, all we have to do is prove to Raito that Ryuuzaki isn't just all for the nookie. Which I'm positive about at this point."

"And how does Sayu-chan know that?" Misa questioned the youngest of the Yagami clan. The young girl smirked once again, a finger poised up at her mouth.

"Easy... because he told me."

* * *

If Raito had been in a state of cataclysmal shock, then he was probably now dead in his own body.

"Is Raito-kun alright?! Please don't tell me we are going to be doing this again?"

"L... Ryuuzaki... whatever the hell your name is..."

"Yes, Raito-kun?" L was just pleased to have the young man speaking.

"This is... your mansion?"

"Well, when your paintings sell for so much money, it's quite easy to invest in such large real estate."

"And those multitudes of cars?"

"Mine as well."

"And you're not some eccentric billionaire trying to pass himself off as L?"

"Raito-kun. Be serious."

"Then you... really are L."

"Yes..."

"L... Oh my God, L..."

"Hmm... it will be nice to hear you repeating that in bed..."

"L..."

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"Could you... do me a favor?"

"Of course."

"Catch me, please."

"What do you mean, Rait-urgh!"

DEAD FAINT!

Epic L Catch!

Sigh.

"Just when we were getting somewhere. Aizawa, I think it would be best if Raito-kun and I were left alone. I shall place him in my bedroom until he awakes."

"Er... is that for the best, L?"

"Don't you trust me, Aizawa?"

"... ... ..." Dead Silence.

"Right. I will just see you later."

L carried the young man half hazardously up the steps of his home, barely even flinching at the added wait upon his own fragile looking body. Aizawa shook his head as he put his coat away on one of the many coat hangers within reach. (Why they needed so many, he would never know.)

"Oh, you poor, poor boy..."

And Raito hadn't even been there for 15 minutes yet.

* * *

I think if I keep updating so fast... I'll die. O.O; Dear mother of cow, I've created a monster. Next chapter? ((Faints)) Maybe... if I get reviews?


	14. Questioning Good Faith

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Fourteen: _Questioning Good Faith_

* * *

It had to shine.

Really, that was Aizawa's top priority when it came to his bodacious hairstyle.

Well, that and making sure he practiced his greatest move; The Awesome Afro Shake Of Sexiness. But that was a different subject altogether.

The strict-looking man actually managed to smile without it looking strained; a floaty feeling, much like a drug high, stirring in the pit of his stomach as he picked up a large bottle off one of the bathroom shelves. A small pick sat on the edge of the porcelain sink, waiting to be picked up and put to use.

But more than anything else, the amount of sheen soaked into his hair had to be calculated at just the right percentage...

'Damn...' Aizawa thought as he continued to spray liberal amounts of the contents of the bottle, aptly named _**"Crazy Fantastic Jerry Curl Juice" **_into his bad ass locks. 'I'm starting to sound like L.'

And that scared him more than the prospect of having no fantastical hair at all.

Aizawa shivered.

Yet, even though the guy both creeped him out and just genuinely scared him shitless, Aizawa had grown attached to the crazy-ass pervert. He made it his duty to at least try and keep the peace between the rest of the world and L.

It was most definitely not as easy as it looked. And it didn't even look that easy to begin with.

L was definitely a one-of-a-kind guy, that was for sure.

'Yeah, a one of kind freaky-deaky psychotic guy I have to **_babysit_**...'

Spriz, spritz.

"Aah..." Aizawa grinned at his reflection, finally grabbing the lonely pick off the counter and fluffing up his pride and joy. "So beautiful..."

And that was a fact.

'That kid, though...' Aizawa paused briefly in his 'picking', a thoughtful expression overcoming his slightly weathered features. 'He gives me the same kind of weirdo-vibes that L does... just not as creepy or perverted-like.'

There was something about that boy that told the Afro-ed man that the mansion was in for a whole lot of crazy-crazy.

Well... more crazy-crazy than usual.

L was the owner, you know.

Aizawa just shrugged it all off, checking his monstrous puffball for any imperfections. His smile lengthened as his hair jiggled in perky shiny-ness.

Now, all that was left was to practice...

"You just can't get this kind of sexy hair just anywhere..."

Swish!

Awesome Afro Shake of Sexiness!

Yup, it was good to be Aizawa.

* * *

This was not supposed to be erotic.

Nope, not one bit...

So how did Raito manage to make it seem so?

L stared at the young, unconscious (And gorgeous. Did he mention gorgeous?) man lying on _**his **_bed, a thumb methodically placed in between his pale lips, gently nibbling the digit.

For some strange reason, his leg couldn't stop convulsing.

"Mmm..." Raito quietly moaned in his sleep, turning slightly on his side. L now had a clear view of the boy's face, lax in complete unconsciousness.

Long eyelashes laying gently over flushed cheeks flickered over closed eyes, the color of the most exquisite chocolate brown. Mocha bangs hung in a disarray around the 23 year old's youthful face, giving him a look of relaxation, something L could tell Raito did little of. Cherry red lips parted slightly, the breaths coming out in smooth exhales, the slow rising of Raito's chest proof of his deep sleep.

L then bit his thumb...

Hard.

'I can definitely think of something else that's hard...'

"Uuhh..." Raito rolled over once again, another groan escaping his pouty mouth. The lithe form in front of the older man relaxed itself once again, granting L a great view of the artist's ass.

L blinked.

And then he blinked again.

'No wonder Aizawa doesn't trust me...' L vacantly thought as he tilted his head to the side. 'I don't even trust myself.'

Before he could step forward and climb into the bed along with the smexiest man evar, a small 'poof!' was heard over his right shoulder.

"You know..." A chibi-version of himself with a halo perched over his head sat awkwardly on his shoulder, glaring absently at the dark-haired man. "There's really only so much one guy can take all in one day. Give him a break for once, and just shuffle out of the room..."

"Oh please!" L heard another 'poof!', now over his left shoulder, as another chibi-version of himself, this one hunched over standing and with devil's horns protruding from his hair. "He's not some little five-year-old baby! You've already seen him naked! What the Hell are you waiting for; go get him!"

L began to take his first step yet again.

"Wait!" L halted, Chibi-Angel L glaring abhorrently at Chibi-Devil L. "Just think about it. The guy has undergone a huge shock-"

"I can think of something else that's 'huge' and that our dear little Raito-kun could 'undergo'."

Chibi-Angel L gave Chibi-Devil L a blank stare. "What does that even mean?"

Chibi-Devil L smirked malevolently. "It means he can bend over and take it with a smi-"

"This is not helping my dilemma." L dimly commented out loud, cutting off Chibi-Devil L as he now began staring at the very apparent bulge in his pants.

Both Chibi's blinked down at the 'problem' between L's legs before turning to the other.

L then glanced at the angel-version of himself, quirking an eyebrow up on his forehead.

"... ... ... ... Ok, maybe a _little _fondling wouldn't be _**so **_bad." Chibi-Angel L stated with a thumb to his lips and a blush staining his cheeks.

"Heh... a little. Sure..." Chibi-Devil L maniacally laughed as both figments suddenly poof-ed out of existence, leaving L by himself once again.

'I guess that solves that problem, then.' Decision finally made, (Though there had obviously never been a question to decide upon to begin with) L quietly made his way to the other side of the bed and sat down.

The mattress barely made a squeak in response.

Within his head, L made a tally.

Step One: Completed Biatch

L then slowly crawled over to where Raito was sleeping, being extra careful not to allow his full weight (as if it was much to begin with) to lean on either of his hands. He finally made his way to the bootylicious boy, smiling eerily as the 23-year-old's visage now directly faced him.

Step Two: Kicked It's Ass

The older man then placed one hand over the angelic boy's face, softly stroking the skin reverently, trying to gauge the other's level of sleep.

Raito didn't even twitch.

Step Three: Fuck Yeah It's Done

L leaned in, smirking as he once again invaded the boy's personal bubble (Raito positively hated when he did this) and placed his face millimeters away from the sleeping man's own slumbering visage. An arm curled itself around Raito's side, bringing the young man's body closer to L's own. Dark eyes closed as the older artist finally leaned in, drenching those rosy lips with his own.

The panda-eyed man tightened his grip around Raito's waist while his other hand wandered up the man's chest, his mouth applying just a bit more pressure against the other's mouth. L's wanderous hand slyly moved underneath Raito's head, this one wrenching itself into the soft auburn tresses that captivated the man.

A soft sigh peeled itself from the sleeping man, causing L to move his mouth back just the smallest of spaces. A low mewl escaped those luscious lips as Raito instinctively moved closer to the heat beside him, leaning his head forward in deep sleep.

L didn't need an invitation to continue, but it was appreciated none the less.

Once again, the older of the two plunged forward, this time parting his lips against Raito's. L, however, got the shock of his life when the unconscious man opened his own mouth slightly, allowing the other entry inside the sweet cavern.

'Is he kissing me in his sleep?' L thought absently as he languidly stroked Raito's tongue with his own, once again surprised when Raito responded as well. 'Well I'll be damned...'

Step Four: HELL YES, I DID IT! I AM SO GONNA GET LAID TONIGHT!

Raito moaned quietly, the sound resonating inside his throat in the most delicious of ways. L pulled on of his legs over the other's bringing their lower bodies closer together while the hand that had been laying dormant around Raito's waist slowly began to trail up his spine. The dark haired man groaned as both of their bodies completely intertwined against one another, the 23-year-old's body shuddering in response to L's advances.

Raito's own arms somehow managed to wrap themselves around L's own shoulders, the younger man seemingly cuddling him in his sleep. L would have thought it cute if he hadn't been so very turned on at that very moment.

Long fingers began to trail at the zipper of the younger artist's pants, ready to delve in and FINALLY get some one on one time with a certain part of Raito's body, when-

_**"Some guys like to sweet talk, and others, they like to tease. Tie my hands behind my back and-Ooo, I'm in ecstasy."**_

SUPER CRASH!

"FUCK!"

"GAH!"

"L! WHAT THE HELL WAS YOUR HAND DOING GRIPPING MY CROTCH WHILE I WAS UNCONSCIOUS?! AND WHY IS IT STILL THERE?!"

Crazy Handed Bitch Slap!

"Ow... My spleen..."

_**"Don't slobber me with kisses, I can get that from my sisters. Before I get too cranky, you better..."**_

Raito Kick of Shame!

"My other spleen!"

Raito glared at the other man's dramatic display as he, for once, thanked his cell phone from hell and pulled the vibrating object out of his pocket.

_**"Like hanky panky, hanky panky, nothing like a good spanky, good spanky. Don't take out your handkerchiefs, I don't wanna cry, I just wanna hanky panky."**_

And then promptly sweat dropped.

'Nope, you still manage to screw me over you damn cell phone.' Raito thought to himself as he cursed the electronic device nine ways up some fat guy's ass and back.

The younger man got up from the floor, leaving L writhing on the ground in pain and sat on the fluffy bed as he flipped the phone open and rolled his eyes at who's number he saw as he accepted the call.

Just what he needed...

"Yagami-kun!"

The daily call from the gayest unknown member of the Village People.

"What is it, Matsuda?"

"Oh, Yagami-kun, you don't sound too up to spirits! Are you alright?"

Raito flopped back against the bed, almost smacking himself on the face. If Matsuda could tell he was still disoriented, then he must sound as if he had been smoking a shit load of crack.

And still doing so as he spoke with the dim-witted manager over the phone.

"I'm fine. Could you please get to why you called? You kind of annoy the crap out of me, as it's one of the reasons these calls are so limited, remember..."

"Aah, yeah. I forget, Yagami-kun is so shy-"

"Bullshit!"

"So he hates talking on the phone! Well, I was just calling to let you know that the art director wants to hear your final decision about the contract and the painting still in the gallery. You know, all that legal mumbo-jumbo stuff."

"When does he want to meet with me?"

"He says as soon as possible. He really wants to see your newest collection and see it as soon as he's able."

Raito blinked as he gazed blankly at the ceiling, not sure what to say.

"Yagami-kun?"

"Next Wednesday at 3:00 p.m. Tell him I'll meet him at the museum so we can talk."

"Alrighty then! Can you believe it, Yagami-kun? Your dream is finally coming true! SQWEE!"

"... ... ... ... And you were doing so well in actually holding up a semi-normal conversation, Matsuda. I'll talk to you later, when I don't want to beat your face in."

"But Yaga-"

Click.

Raito sighed as pocketed the crazy cell phone back and continued to gaze up at the ceiling, not even paying attention to sleep-fondler now next to him on the bed.

"Raito-kun..."

The auburn-haired artist pouted as he ignored the pervert.

"Raito-kun..."

Raito still refused to say a word.

"Rai-chan, please talk to me..."

Damn it. This would work a lot better if the person he were trying to ignore couldn't pull off the smexy pout-and-wide-panda-eyes look.

"Stop trying to be cute when I'm mad at you, you insane hentai!"

"But Rai-chan looked so delectable in his sleep... and he even responded back, showing that he is just as desperate to get in my pants as I am in his."

"Let's make a deal."

L's face perked up immediately.

"You stop molesting me in my sleep, and you'll get laid..."

A grin lit up L's face-

"Eventually."

Only to wilt almost immediately.

"That is not much of a deal, Raito-kun. Your cute 'eventually' could span months and months, and quite frankly, I don't think my schlong can last that long."

Raito smirked as he sat up on the bed, gazing at L with hooded eyes.

'This man is going to be the death of me... but even if so, at least it will be a sexy one.' L thought as he gazed heatedly at the look on the younger man's face.

"You should trust me, L. And I mean that in every sense of the word."

Why was it that Raito could turn L on without actually DOING anything other than sit down and look at him?

"Will Raito-kun at least make out with me to make up for lost sexing up time?"

Raito rolled his eyes as he pulled the man on top of him and hooked his legs around his waist.

"And since when do you ask?"

"Courtesy question, Raito-kun. Courtesy question..."

"Mmm..."

* * *

"I'll see you both later!" Misa waved at the two other woman, walking out of the restaurant and skipping off on the sidewalk. The blonde haired girl whipped out her cell phone, step one in their plan; Project: Raito In The Sack (A.K.A: R.I.T.S.) in full swing.

One ring... then two...

"He-hello?" ((_gasp_))

"Rai-chan?"

"Mi-sa..." ((_stop that now!_))

"Yayz! I reached you! Tee-hee! So, when are we meeting today, my gay love!"

"Aah... meeting?" ((_I'm on the phone, you perv!_))

"Yeah... Raito said so yesterday! Don't tell me you forgot!"

"No-no! I didn't... uh... forget..." ((_Oh, that feels nice_...))

"So..."

"How about an hour from now?" ((_Don't give me that look, you knew you weren't getting any action!_))

"OK! MISA-MISA WILL SEE HER RAI-CHAN LATER! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYZ!"

"Er... yeah. See you later, Misa." ((_I'm getting off, already! Sheesh! ... ... ... Why are you grinning at me like that? What did I-Oh! You pervert!_))

"Bye-bye Rai-chan!"

Click.

Misa smiled serenely as she innocently dropped her cell phone back into her pocket book.

Phase One: Success

The gothic princess continued to prance down the street, a feeling of devious contentment bubbling up in her chest. "This is gonna be fun..."

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Hanky Panky" by Madonna, which was suggested to me by great MiaoShou. (Yup, I went with the obvious song choice. I can't help it, I'm a comedy whore. XD)

I think I gave the wrong impression at the end of the last chapter in my little a.n. Let me say this now, so that nobody gets the wrong idea from me:

I will not stop writing this story if people either don't review or stop reviewing! **I REPEAT!** I will not stop writing this story if people either don't review or stop reviewing!

I write for the sake of writing, and it wouldn't make much sense to just suddenly not finish a story or withhold a chapter because people don't want to comment. It's nice, and one of the reasons I may ask you to at the end of the chapter, but don't think I am trying to whore out for reviews. That's not my thing.

And on a lighter note, I hope you enjoyed the craziness of this chapter! Next update should be up soon... ish?


	15. The Pursuit of Chaos and Discourse

Title:_** Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Fifteen: _The Pursuit of Chaos and Discourse_

* * *

"I'll be back later."

"Are you positive?"

"Yes. I'll be back. So stop asking."

"I am only making sure Raito-kun plans to keep up with his promise."

"Well, I've already said 'yes' to the _same question _the last 52 times you've asked it, so I doubt very much that my answer is going to change on the 53rd time of asking."

"... ... ... Is Raito-kun positive?"

Raito sweat dropped, his eye twitching as he looked L straight into his ebony-colored eyes.

"Now you're just being a smart-ass. And nobody likes one of those."

L blinked childishly as he clung to Raito's waist tightly.

"I do not care if just _anybody_ else likes them or not. Raito-kun's opinion is the only one that matters to me."

"Aw, how sweet. Now will you let me get in the damn car, you clingy pervert."

The dark-haired man scowled as he glared at the ground in displeasure.

"Am not clingy." L muttered absently.

"And you keep telling yourself that, Mr. Roboto, and I'm sure you'll begin to believe it yourself... even if the rest of the world does not. Now, if you don't mind?"

L sighed as he grumpily detached himself from Raito's waist and pouted darkly. Raito grinned at the sight, ready to climb into the backseat before pulling back once more. Hands grabbed thin looking shoulders as lips met in a chaste lock barely lasting for a second, eyes closing lightly as the two men relished in the small bit of contact.

"I'll see you later... and I might even have a surprise for you when I get back." Raito murmured against the other man's lips, a sharp shiver running up L's spine as he spoke.

"Better be a good hand jo-"

A hand covered the pale lips, eyes slanted irritatingly at the ruined moment.

"Don't kill the moment. It just pisses me off so much when you do."

The younger man then pulled his hand away and climbed into the car, giving L a small wave as he closed the door. The elder artist jammed his hands into his pockets as the car pulled out of the lengthy driveway, midnight black eyes trailing after the Rolls Royce in question. L sighed to himself, a feeling of melancholy escalating up his chest.

"Better be guaranteed some lovin' tonight..."

If Raito could have heard him, he surely would have sweat dropped.

* * *

"Hm... I'll have..." Blonde pigtails repeatedly bounced up and down on the young girl's head as light brown eyes carefully scanned the selection of items in front of her. "I don't knooooooooooooow..."

Several people sighed in annoyance at the perky goth who had been standing at the register for almost ten minutes, cutely tilting her head to the side as her many bracelets tinkled on her wrists, hands being placed on her shaply hips.

"Maybe..."

People looked up in anticipation-

"No, I don't want _that_."

Only to face fault onto the floor in exasperation.

_"C'mon lady! I'm going to be late!"_

_"At least let the next person order! I'm sure they know what they want by now!"_

_"You've been standing there for almost fifteen fucking minutes! Pick something you blonde bimbo!"_

_"You crazy bitch, I should kill you!"_

_"Grr... It's always the wafer chicks..."_

"Hmm... that blueberry muffin looks good, but it's so high in carbs! And I don't want fat thighs... Ick!" The darkly-dressed super nova that was Amane Misa scowled adorably as she continued perusing through the tantalizing food on display and the even more tantalizing "Starbucks" menu, obliviously ignoring the other customers around her as the employee in front of her, who looked like an Emo experiment gone wrong, smacked their gum within their mouth and gave the girl a bored stare.

"You do have people behind you, ya know."

Misa ignored the rude cashier as well, dazing off into her own little world.

_"Meeting in five minutes! MEETING IN FIVE MINUTES!" _

_"Mommy, I've got to go poopie!"_

_"Sweetie, we're in line. You'll just have to wait until we've gotten our order."_

_"But Mommy!"_

_"Need my coffee, need my coffee, need my coffee, need-my-coffee, need-my-coffee, need-my-coffee, need-my-COFFEE!"_

_"Dude, I do not need a Frappuchino this bad."_

_"Shut up and do as you're told, biatch."_

_"... ... ... Yes, sir."_

_"Pwned!"_

_"Jesus Chirst, just what kind of Starbucks is this?!"_

_"The cracky kind, my dear. The cracky kind."_

_"... ... Do I even know you?"_

"**WELL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP ALREADY! I'M TRYING TO ORDER, YOU RUDE INGRATES!"**

The whole crowd now staring blankly at the twitchy blonde within the Starbucks became so quiet, you could hear a pin drop against the perfectly tiled ceramic floor.

Misa then turned back to the stunned cashier and straightened her gothic uniform, all the while grinning perkily as she did so.

"Ahem. May I please have a bottle of water and that will be all."

Everone's jaw dropped simultaneously.

"Uh... that'll be 200 yen."

"Ok! Here ya goes! Keep the change, alright? Tee-hee!"

_"Mommy... I don't think I need to go poopie anymore."_

_"Ew..."_

_Evenly Distributed Sweat Drop._

Misa laughingly skipped off towards the table farthest from the general public (as Raito preferred it) and sat down, waiting for her fabulous gay knight in shining armor.

The girly goth twisted open the cap of her water bottle and daintily took a sip of the crisp liquid, humming in satisfaction at the refreshing feeling. A small bell chime resonated from her pocket book then, alerting Misa of a text message she'd just received. The gothic blonde bombshell quickly slammed the bottle down on the table, ripping her purse open as she dug through her various non-necessities before pulling out a darkly sparkled cell phone with a skull and cross bones phone charm hanging off it's antenna.

She finally flipped the phone open, activating the text as soon as the 'yes or no' message appeared on the screen, eyes widening at the text written.

"**_Phase Two of R.I.T.S. secure. Take him down and keep him there._**

**_No prisoners, Misa-chan._**

**_Much Love,_**

**_Sayu_**"

Misa giggled to herself as the bells over the entrance jingled, her attention span (as small as it was) cut short as she looked over at the door.

Everyone stared as the deliciously handsome cinnamon eyed man entered the room, immediately locking eyes with Misa.

The gothic girl selectively ignored the shuddered grimace the man automatically sent her way.

"**RAITO-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"**

"Oh shit, Misa wa-"

"KYAAA!"

"-it."

Misa Super Glomp Special!

CRASH!

CRASH!

TRIPLE WHAMMY CRASH!

"My dishes!"

"My coffee!"

"My weed!"

"... ... my magnificent ass..."

"Oopsies."

Misa stated as she blinked obliviously at the chaos around her, sitting comfortably on top of Raito's chest as if it was a regular occurrence.

Which it was, unfortunately.

Raito winced as an _extremely_ burly, _extremely_ red faced man came barreling from the back of the coffee shop, a tag reading "Hi, I'm the Manager! How Can I help You Today?" lying limply on his wrinkled collared shirt as he marched towards the oblivious dim-witted blonde and the anxious-looking brunette who sweat dropped in exasperation.

He did not look pleased.

* * *

"You do realize that that's the fifth Starbucks you've managed to get us kicked out of, Misa. And we'd actually managed to hit the half year point of this place, too." Raito's eye twitched erratically as Misa happily sipped her water, skipping down the street as merrily as could be.

"I know! One Starbucks down, who knows how many to go! So, which is the next place to be terrorized on our 'Starbucks Wicked List of Ultimate Evil!', Rai-chan?"

Raito sighed.

Misa had a very sick sense of humor.

"I refuse to go out with you anymore." The blonde goth's eyes twinkled mischievously, knowing that was a bunch of crap.

As much as he stated otherwise, Raito enjoyed these outings as much as she did.

Maybe even more so.

"To Raito's home we go! To Raito's home we go! High ho, the dairy oh! To Raito's home we go! SQWEE!"

And really, annoying the crap out of the cute boy was so much fun. How could she be expected to live without this kind of entertainment?!

"Why are we friends again?" Raito asked the bubbly girl, a sharp look cast in her direction. Misa pretended to contemplate the question, placing her index finger on her chin in faux-thought.

"Maybe it's my beautiful features and lovely, perky disposition that simply makes your day."

The look on Raito's face said otherwise.

"How about the fact I'm getting famous, and therefore hold a lot of connections?"

"Yeah, that sounds about right, actually."

"Tee hee! Raito needs me! Raito loves me! Raito needs me! Raito loves me!"

The light haired artist rolled his eyes as they got to his apartment complex and steadily entered the building and boarded the elevator. "Don't get too excited. It's not like I can't live without you, you ditz."

And Misa finally saw her opening.

"Maybe you can say that about me, but I'm sure you'd feel differently if I was Ryuuzaki."

CLACK!

Raito's keys fell to the ground after accidentally fumbling with the lock to his door, brown eyes wide in shock as tanned cheeks flushed a rapid crimson.

"You said what now?"

An innocent smile lay stretched out against ruby stained lips.

"Said what to who?"

A suspicious glance was sent her way, Raito picking up his keys and finally managing to unlock the door he had spent so much money on.

'She's up to something...' Raito thought as he opened the door. 'But what could it-'

"RAITO-SAMA!"

'-be.'

The young artist's eyes widened as Mikami lay on his living room floor, his clothing scattered about in various places as the lawyer held some lovingly to his chest. If only Raito could see the evil gleam sparkling in Misa's eyes...

He would have run from the apartment in tears.

"HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET INTO MY APARTMENT, YOU SICKO?!"

"You aren't happy to see me, Raito-sama?!"

"Uh... wait, Mikami-kun, don't-"

But it was much to late.

"WHY DOESN'T RAITO-SAMA LOVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

For a couple of seconds, Raito could swear he was deaf.

Misa actually managed to look even more dazed than usual.

And the world stayed quiet, the crazed scream of a banshee scaring every being in existence into a stone-dead silence.

And then the man sniffled, bringing everything back to its state of normality.

"What the fuck...?"

"My sentiments exactly."

Misa blinked as the unstable man on the floor began to sniff some of Raito's clothes, rubbing the articles of clothing against his cheek.

"Psy-choooo..." The young girl sang quietly to herself, taking a step back from the unhinged lawyer.

Raito just stared in horror.

"That was my favorite shirt..."

"And it smells especially like Raito-sama, so I can tell!"

"Uh... how do you even know what I smell like?"

"I keep your cologne under my pillow, so that I feel like I'm always sleeping with Raito-sama!"

"Do you realize how creepy that is?"

Mikami blinked at the attractive 23-year-old. "Eh?"

"... ... ... Nevermind. It's not even worth explaining."

"Raito-sama looks tense."

"Of course, I'm tense! I walk into my apartment, hoping to just come and relax in my HOME, of all places, when all of a sudden-Gah!"

Glomp!

"I'll give Raito-sama a massage!"

Mikami smiled.

Raito cringed.

Misa smirked.

'Everything is going according to plan...' The blonde girl thought to herself. 'Now, all that's left is for Sayu to seal her part of the deal.'

Raito began to sweat lightly, the added weight of the other man suffocating him.

'I don't remember feeling this way with L on top of me...'

Before the younger man could push the obsessive lawyer off of him, a kick and slam of the door alerted Raito of another's presence.

He paled in response.

"Onii-chan! Look who I... found..."

Raito prayed to the Gods he had never believed in that he would not get killed by the end of the night.

"Raito-kun..."

L's eye twitched at the sight in front of him as he roughly bit his thumb in carefully suppressed anger. The man looked ready to murder someone, specifically the man on top of him.

Mikami, on the other hand, glared at the scrawny looking man, not looking the least bit scared. Which actually didn't surprise Raito, seeing as the guy was out of his rabbit ass mind.

Raito simply banged his head against the floor, hoping for unconsciousness to flood his being once again. But life, of course, couldn't be that easy for the sexy artist.

Oh no.

**_"Whatcha gonna do with all that junk? All that junk inside that trunk? I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk! Get you love drunk off my hump!"_**

It was just one of those days...

**_"My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps-"_**

Where Raito had to wonder if homicide really _wasn't _an option.

**_"Check it out!"_**

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas... and I am terribly glad for it. That song makes me want to kill someone.

Quick update, I know, but at times I really can't help myself. Lol! And now the plan is starting to unfold... Oh, what has Sayu done? XD See ya soon!


	16. Walking That Extra Fine Line

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Sixteen: _Walking That Extra Fine Line_

* * *

Silence.

But it wasn't the kind that Raito enjoyed.

Oh no.

It was the oppressive sort of quiet that chilled your bones, giving you just a small taste of what was to come.

The calm before the storm, so to speak.

Or in Raito's case, the center of the fan before the shit hit it.

But going on, Raito knew for a fact that this kind of silence only promised to bring pain and ultimate anguish...

To himself, of course.

"Mikami-kun, if you don't mind?" Raito's Death Glare of Doom! was in full effect, but did nothing to get the other man off of him. L was beginning to scare the bejesus out of him as well, with the way fist kept shaking and the constant angry nibbling away at his thumb.

Raito didn't know if this was a good thing for him or not, yet.

'Fucking damn it, why won't this fucktard get the hell off of me?! The man is like a brick wall of bat shit crazy!' Raito exclaimed inside his mind, an internal shudder the only "proof" that Raito was completely and utterly creeped the fuck out.

But it didn't matter in the long run...

"Get. The. Fuck. Off. Him. NOW."

L's glare deepened, a look of pure fury encasing his normally blank facade.

Apparently, L had everything under control.

For some strange reason, Raito was relieved to relinquish the control over to L...

But just for now.

"_Yeah, you keep telling yourself that Mr. McPansyPants. When he gets you strapped in that bed, let's see who'll be in control then._"

Oh, if only his own brain would shut the fuck up, what a happy, **sane **person he would be.

The older, much more terrifying man finally stomped forward, ready to punch the psycho lawyer off HIS Raito-kun, when the 23 year old felt his phone vibrate once again, alerting him of the continuing call.

_**"What ya gon'do with all that ass? All that ass inside them jeans?" **_

"Mikami-kun..." Raito tried to take a deep breath and count down to ten, but he was barely getting past three.

And the man was not even moving.

"Mikami-kun, get off..."

Still no response.

And Raito could only take so much...

_**"I'm a make, make, make, make you scream-"**_

"COULD YOU GET THE FUCK OFF ME ALREADY?!"

_**"Make you scream, make you scream!"**_

Until Raito finally snapped.

Mikami quickly scrambled off the scary artist, Raito's wide eyed hysterical glare giving him the impression of a homicidal maniac ready to make his first kill.

That analogy really wasn't that far off from the truth.

The handsome, yet completely worn out, 23 year old sex god finally grabbed the cell phone out of his pocket and snapped it open.

"Hello?"

"Raito?"

"Dad? Is that you?"

"Yes, of course. Son, what's the matter?"

Raito glanced around the room, the varying faces meeting his gaze making the ache in his head grow exponentially.

"Nothing that can't be cured with a gun shot wound to the head."

Raito heard his father's muffled chuckles, glad he got the joke for once.

"Well, there's not much that _can't_, Raito."

The young man smiled wearily.

"Very true. Now, you called me because...?"

"Why does there have to be a reason for me calling, Raito? A father can't call his son to see how he's doing from time to time?"

"... ... ..." Raito said nothing, allowing his silence to speak for him.

Really, Soichirou and Sayu were a lot more alike than most people thought.

"Alright, alright. You've got me. I know it's short notice, but your mother and I are at your apartment. For some strange reason, she just had the sudden urge to visit you."

"WHAT?!"

"Raito?"

"Oh God..."

"You don't have that creepy guy with you over there... doing... er... well... having your 'happy fun time'?"

"Did you just say 'happy fun time'?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Just... just checking on that."

"Hm... so do you?"

Raito sighed, his day killing him softly...

Oh so softly.

"Dad."

"Yes son?"

"I'll see you soon."

"That's fine, we'll be at your door just about..."

Knock, knock, knock!

"Now."

Sudden Crash!

Raito's ass was starting to become numb from the number of times it met the floor on a daily bases.

"Raito-sama!"

"Raito-chan!"

"Onii-chan!"

"Fuck!"

From his spot on the floor, with both Misa and Mikami hunched over him, (L steaming at the sight of Mikami anywhere in Raito's breathing space) Raito watched his sister glance over at him before going to open the door, allowing both of his parents inside the apartment in the process.

Raito let his head fall on the hardwood floor once again.

'Still conscious, damn it!'

"Son? What the Hell is going on?!" Soichirou stated as he watched Misa pull on her skirt while Mikami kept trying to put his hand down Raito's shirt to 'check for a heart beat'.

"Rai-chan!" Sachiko cried out, seeing her son sprawled on the floor as Mikami kept trying to molest him.

"Ow..."

"I'll give him CPR!" Mikami cried out as he knelt on top of the poor man (again) and dove in, just centimeters from his lips-

Epic L Super Duper Sexy Punch!

"GET OFF MY SMEXY, UTTERLY HOT BOYFRIEND, YOU SON OF A MAN-BITCH!"

"Ryuuzaki-san!"

"Woah... I think he broke his nose! Jeez, on just one hit, too!"

Mikami lay unconscious on the floor, blood dripping down his face as Raito glanced over at the fallen body from his own spot on the floor. "Damn, Ryuuzaki. Couldn't you have at least not made him bleed? I just got this floor re-done, you know."

L kicked Mikami's body, just for sport.

"No." He stated evenly, dark eyes glaring down at the crazy lawyer underneath his feet.

Raito sweat dropped.

"Er... is this a bad time?" Sachiko quietly asked from beside her husband, Soichirou seemingly in a daze after L's crazed announcement.

"Oh no, Sachiko-san." L stated, now back to normal. "I'll just take out the trash and we'll be all set to go."

L then picked up Mikami's body by himself without even flinching in the slightest and threw him outside, closing and locking the door in the process. "Alright. Now, how's everyone doing today?"

The room full of people gazed at L warily, not sure whether or not the man was stable himself.

"Wow, Raito. You sure know how to pick the crazies." Misa stated as she crossed her arms across her chest and gave L the evil eye. "But I have to get going now. I've got a shoot to get to in about... hot damn! I've only got twenty minutes before I'm late!"

Misa smiled at the group, with the exception of L, and ran out of the apartment, toeing over Mikami's unconscious body as she closed the door behind her.

L locked the door once again.

Soichirou looked as if he were ready to keel over right where he was standing.

"Dad...?"

"'Tou-san?"

"Er... kids, I think you should give you're father a little break for a second. Honey, blink once if you need a couple minutes to collect yourself."

Blink.

"See? He'll be fine. Let's go sit down while your father cools down!" Sachiko happily pranced into the living room, sitting down on the couch as Sayu did the same. L grabbed the young man

off the floor and hauled him over to the love seat, putting an arm over the younger artist to keep him as close as humanly possible. Raito allowed it, for the simple fact that L was beginning to scare him with his super strength.

"How have you been, Sachiko-san?" L politely asked his future mother in law (whether Raito liked it or not!), nuzzling the younger man's neck as he practically leaned on top of his 'official' (in L's eyes) boyfriend's figure. Raito couldn't have looked more uncomfortable as his mother laughingly smiled at the sight.

'Pick your battles, Raito. Pick your battles...'

Like in the bedroom, tonight. To which the pervert would no doubt be expecting to spend the night.

Raito could have snorted in frustration.

Yeah... right.

"Oh, I've been fine, Ryuuzaki-kun! And I see you and my son seemed to have... bonded." Raito did not like the grin covering his mother's face at the end of that statement.

"Oh, they've done more than 'bond' from what I've heard!" Sayu giggled as she gave her brother her most malicious of smiles.

'You little bitch...'

"In fact..." Sayu whispered conspiratorially. "A little birdy told me that those two are just about ready to-"

"SAYU!"

And for once, it wasn't Raito.

"Er... Sorry Dad." The young girl pouted as Soichirou finally snapped out of his daze and walked over to the couch and awkwardly sat down, staring at the two men cuddled (In Raito's case, sitting stiffly) together on the love seat, L smiling at him in his most warmest of ways...

Which unfortunately, came out as creepy and perverted.

Soichirou looked even more unsettled than before.

"I think we need to lay some ground rules out right now." The police officer spat out, his eye twitching erratically.

'I guess it's genetic.' Raito thought to himself as he stared at his father's magical eye.

L actually had the nerve to look amused about the whole thing.

"One: No making out in front of me. Two: No being NAKED in front of me. Three: In general, no doing anything that can be classified as flaming. Four: No_** molesting **_of my son in front of me-"

L pouted as he pulled his hand back from Raito's pants.

"Five: If I call, no doing anything freaky in that span of time... PERIOD! And finally, Six: No public displays of affection in my presence... ever."

"Are you done?" Sachiko commented dryly as everyone else in the room sweat dropped.

"... ... ... Yes."

Sachiko rolled her eyes as she then turned her attention back to the couple at hand. "So, when are you two finally coming over for dinner?"

"What?!"

The Yagami men certainly did have a lot in common.

Even their shock sounded the same.

"You heard me..." Sachiko pasted a faux motherly smile on her face, the son-ly guilt already worming its way into Raito's heart. "Rai-chan barely even visits me anymore... and you've been dating Ryuuzaki-kun for over a month-"

"Says who?!"

"And yet, you haven't brought him to the house yet! Doesn't Rai-chan love me anymore?"

"Mother, you know that's not-"

"I just want to spend some time with my son and his significant other..."

"Mom, I-"

"Is that really too much to ask for?"

Raito sighed... acknowledging his defeat.

"Of course not, okaa-san."

Sachiko's face immediately brightened as Soichirou's simply sagged further.

He looked just as disturbed about the idea as Raito did.

L just looked so damn pleased...

He wasn't even going to look over at Sayu. God knows what expression was on that crazy face...

"Heh, heh, heh..."

And that evil giggling was not helping his imagination.

"How about this Friday coming up, at about 7:00 p.m. That ok with you, Ryuuzaki?" Raito boringly glanced at the now excited artist, his dark eyes lighting up with glee.

'Hm... he looks cute when he's all excited like that...' Raito smiled to himself as L nodded emphatically towards the older couple, and for a moment, Raito could have sworn L had shot Sayu a triumphant smirk...

But that was just his imagination, right?

"Alrighty, then!" Sachiko exclaimed as she stood up and pulled both Sayu and Soichirou up by their arms.

"Hey!"

"Sachiko!"

"I'm guessing you lovebirds want some time alone, huh?" Soichirou looked positively horrified at even the aspect of L and Raito doing the nasty. "We'll see you both in a couple of days!"

L grinned as he waved goodbye to the Yagami family, Sayu giving him a corny thumbs up on the way out.

"Make sure to tap that ass, Ryuuza-"

SLAM!

For once, Raito was glad to hear the door slam oh, so loudly.

"Have I ever told Raito-kun just how delightful I find his family?" L tilted his head to the side as he completely leaned over on Raito, their bodies halfway laying on the small amount of space the love seat had to offer. "They are a never ending source of-"

"Pain and embarrassment?"

"I was going to say amusement, but I suppose in Raito-kun's case, that works too."

"So not funny, L."

"Ah, and I must congratulate Raito-kun on not giving away my identity the whole time I was here. Kudos!"

"What do you think I am, an idiot? I'm not just gonna sell you out because you're a big pervert who has no self control whatsoever... though every instinct I hold dear tells me I should."

"That is just another way of Raito-kun saying he looooooves me."

"Careful. You might start sounding like Mikami."

"... ... ... ... Now Raito-kun is simply trying to kill my hard on."

Raito stifled his laughter as the older man smirked, a warmth filling his body at the silky sounds coming out of the younger artist's throat.

"What would give you that idea, L?"

L ignored the question and finally went in for the kill, capturing the man's lips in a burning kiss as he'd been wanting to since Raito had left his home. Spidery fingers gripped at the man's expensive clothing, his head tilting slightly to get in at a better angle.

Large ebony eyes lightly closed as mouths parted and gasps were muffled by the other's own lips. Hair mixed together in an eclectic clash of dark versus light, Raito's own hands coming up to each side of L's face as he rose his head from off the cushions and pressed up further into L's own mouth, almost as eager as the older artist himself.

"Now, if only we could get past this point," L whispered as they both pulled apart for air, rapid breathing filling the room. "I think I'd be a very happy man."

Raito rolled his eyes, shaking his head at the pervert.

"Don't hold your breath, mystery man."

"But Raito-kuuuuuuuuun... you said you had a surprise for me..."

"Never said it was the smexy kind."

Thunk!

"Raito-kun is so mean..."

"And you love it."

Grumble...

"I'd love it even more in bed..."

Raito's laughter was his only response as the younger man pounced on top of him on the floor.

"But seriously, I need some booty, Raito-kun."

Raito kissed him then, finally getting the guy to shut up about sex for more than five seconds at a time.

'Success.'

* * *

_**Meanwhile, outside Yagami Raito's apartment...**_

"Do you think he's dead?"

"I don't know... poke him with your back scratcher and see!"

"Er..."

Poke... Poke...

"He's not moving..."

"Maybe we should call 911?"

"Hm... nah. Just leave him there. He's probably half-baked anyways."

"Heh, let's draw naughty pictures on his face and pee on his broken body!"

"Yayz!"

"Now that's what I call a good time..."

"Now, get the Sharpie out and let's rock out with our cocks out!"

* * *

"So, phase two complete. Are you ready for phase three, Sayu-chan?"

Sayu grinned as she twirled Raito's cell phone in her hand.

"Of course. It's only a matter of time, now..."

Sachiko sweat dropped as her daughter laughed maniacally, her husband looking very confused.

'Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.'

* * *

Lol! And yet more and more of the plan unfolds... Oh god, L and Raito at his parent's house? With Sayu and the evil cell phone of DOOM?! Ah, so many questions... so little time. Lol! See ya soon!


	17. Disturbing the Equilibrium

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Seventeen: _Disturbing the Equilibrium_

* * *

"And you're here again, why?"

Raito's eye twitched at the sight before him, dark macabre eyes blinking innocently as a small smile graced the face of the man in front of his now open door. It was a good two hours before they had to go to his parent's house, and he had not been expecting for L to just show up out of the blue, looking as if he had no idea why the younger artist was shocked.

L was really too good at playing stupid.

'Shit, the guy's made it an art!' Raito thought to himself as L shuffled his sockless sneaker-clad feet against the hallway floor.

"I wanted to spend some alone-time with Raito-kun before we went to see his family." L commented as he slipped into the apartment, not even waiting for Raito to give an invitation inside.

But really, Raito opened the door for him, and that was an invitation in and of itself.

Even if the light haired man would say otherwise.

"But of course you did..." Raito sarcastically murmured as he closed the door behind him and followed L inside, rolling his eyes at the mock-naivety L passed off without a second thought. The younger of the two blinked as he entered the living room, then noticing the bag within his boyfriend's (God damn it, his mom had practically made it official) left hand. "L? What do you have in the bag?" Raito couldn't help asking.

Curiosity didn't kill the cat, but it sure as hell was gonna do something to Raito one of these days.

"Clo-thes..." L sang out as he tossed the bag aside and perched himself on top of the couch, turning to Raito with yet another candid grin as the younger man peered down at him with mistrust in his own eyes. "I would feel much better if Raito-kun came to sit down beside me."

"I think you'll be fine." The 23 year old dryly stated as he turned to leave the room.

"Where are you going?" L questioned, his voice bending slightly with a small lilt.

"Somewhere over the rainbow, now leave me alone, you big pervert." And with that, Raito left the living room without another word.

And L followed after him.

"Raito-kun..." The anonymous artist whined as he quickly caught up to the sexy misanthrope, quickly catching the door ready to slam in his face as Raito entered his sacred room...

Which now held no privacy for him whatsoever.

"What the hell, L?" Raito drawled out as the man then bounced on his bed, reclining himself into a relaxed position as Raito glared down at him. "Well, we have about two hours before we have to go to dinner... I did not think I would actually have to list my reasons for being here, Raito-kun."

Back Smack!

"Ow."

"Didn't we already have a conversation about you and your pervy ways?!" Raito exclaimed while L rubbed the back of his head delicately. "We have had several, if I recall correctly. All of them consisting of you not putting out and declaring me a national bodily hazard to yourself while I'm left to deal with the consequences of your proverbial smexiness."

"Damn straight. I'm hot, but I think you overdue it when it comes to praising this pure slab of sexiness."

Double hair flip.

Blank stare.

"I can not help it if just looking at Raito-kun makes me want to tackle him and have my way with him in the middle of his bedroom floor. It is a natural reaction, and for that, I can only blame my hormones."

Raito sweat dropped.

"I'm sure, L. And I'm also sure all those dirty e-mails you've been sending me about various sexual positions just happened to slip on your computer screen... because that's all your 'hormone's' fault, too."

"Of course, Raito-kun. Now, if Raito-kun would at least give me some head, I'm sure those e-mails would stop coming."

'... ... ... ... oh, he's sick.'

'_Oh, you love it._'

Raito gritted his teeth in anger.

He refused to get into another argument with himself.

He refused, damn it!

"Now, how about that fella-"

"L!" Raito's face flushed an unnatural (unnatural until he met L, that is) crimson and stomped into his closet, cinnamon eyes narrowed dangerously as L's innocent smile no longer seemed so innocent.

"Raito-kun knows he wants to!"

SLAM!

L snuggled up in Raito's bed, the younger man's enticing scent clinging off the sheets he laid on comfortably.

Now if only he could get that man in here too... preferably naked, of course...

Oh, L could die a happy man.

"AND STOP SNIFFING MY SHEETS WHILE THINKING HENTAI THOUGHTS, L!"

The older man pouted as the yell reverberated throughout the apartment.

Raito always ruined all his fun.

* * *

"Aren't you going to get dressed, Pervert-o-man?" Raito asked the lone artist as he pulled on his long sleeve crimson shirt. L got up from the bed and grabbed the other man by the waist, spinning him around as he did so. Before the other could protest, L kissed him quickly on the lips. Raito blinked stupidly as the man carefully nuzzled his neck. "Did I say something...?"

"No. I just wanted to hold you."

Raito blushed as the artist smiled against the crook of his neck, ebony eyes glimmering in satisfaction. "And plus, Raito-kun is especially cute when he is embarrassed like that. It makes me want to snuggle with him even more than usual."

"Ok, who are and what the hell have you done with my freak of a boyfriend!"

"But Raito-kunnnnn-"

"You want something, don't you?"

"... ... ... You mean more than what I usually want?"

Raito cringed.

"Yeah, that came out pretty stupid. But you know what I mean, L. You wouldn't be acting all 'cutesy' unless there was something you were getting out of it..."

"I am simply showing Raito-kun affection, is all. For once, I am not trying to get him to have sex with me..."

Raito sighed in relief.

"Unless he wanted to."

Only to snort in astonishment.

"You really don't know how to keep the whole 'cute boyfriend' thing going, huh?"

L blinked.

"What did I say now?"

Raito sweat dropped in exasperation.

"Nothing, L. Nothing at all..."

L smiled before reaching down, Raito not noticing the lack of hand on one of his hips until-

"GAH!"

It was too late.

"DAMN IT, L! STOP BEING SO DAMN HORNY AND GET YOUR MOTHER FLIPPING HAND OUT OF MY PANTS!"

L's evil grin told the young man that that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.

"You take pleasure in my misery, don't you?" Raito asked the older man as his hand stayed firmly within the confines between his pants and ass. "I'm telling you right now, if you try tickling my ass-hole, there will be hell to-"

L's lips crashed on top of Raito's while he was talking, muffling the rest of what he was going to say with his own mouth.

Raito could definitely get used to being interrupted this way.

"You still have to get dressed..." Raito panted as he quickly pulled away, swatting the stray hand away from his pants and ass. L's eyes widened as his mouth formed a pout, a (damn it, Raito refused to admit that to the crazy man's face!) cute look encapturing the other man's face as he tried to recapture the other man's luscious lips-

Only to be rebuked once again.

"I'm serious, L. This is going to be a decisive thing for my family... I don't EVER bring my significant other's to my parent's house, let alone actually let them speak to them for any amount of time." Raito blushed as went into the living room, L still trailing behind him, and grabbed the discarded bag that lay all by its lonesome on the floor next to his couch. "You'll actually be the first boyfriend I've ever even brought to see my parents, to tell you the truth. The least you could do is be a bit more serious about this."

The older artist frowned, the implications quite clear to him as Raito spoke. "You do not think I am serious when it comes to this relationship."

Raito said nothing as he fidgeted with the small knot of the bag, his back completely turned to the other man.

"Is that why Raito-kun is so hesitant to do anything beyond kiss? Do you truly believe that I will simply leave you after the deed is done?"

Raito still did not say a word.

L's mouth thinned as he snatched the bag away from Raito's hand, dismissing the look of shock on the younger man's face as he slouched off into the other man's bathroom.

He had a family to get ready for.

* * *

Raito stood in shock as the man he had grown so fond to basically stomped into his bathroom without a second backwards glance. A part of him felt angry; how else was he supposed to feel, considering all L ever did was try to fondle him and talk about how fantabulous it would be to screw him! Were his own insecurities really all that unbelievable?

And his reaction-

What the hell?!

Wasn't _he _the one that was supposed to be angry?

Raito was not very emotional, and tended not to make personal connections with the people he casually dated. It wasn't that he didn't care for them, but he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that he did not _love_any of them. And with L... Ryuuzaki...

He felt different.

It was amazing, really.

Raito had barely known the man for less than two months...

Two months.

And he already felt so tied to this perverted anti version of HIMSELF! Raito could honestly see himself falling in love with this insane man...

If only he would show he was falling too.

Raito sighed to himself as he straightened his clothes out, glancing at the time as he awaited for L to make his way out of the bathroom.

6:15 p.m.

'This is going to be a loooooong night...'

* * *

L's eye twitched as he buttoned up the collar shirt that he (Aizawa) was forcing himself to wear, not wanting to rip any of the buttons out of misplaced anger.

Damn that Yagami Raito for constantly bombarding him with feelings he had never felt before.

If the boy wasn't so damn sexy...

Hell, what was L thinking? Raito without his sexiness was NOT Raito. And that had to be disrupting some natural order of some sort... right?

'How could Raito-kun think that I'm just after sex?! I could have gotten that just about anywhere else by this point! Damn it, I even told him one of my biggest secrets...' L slammed his hands against the counter as he finished with the last button. He looked up to see his reflection, shaggy black hair crookedly cropped over obsidian colored eyes with dark bags under them from countless nights of no sleep. A pale complexion the shade of milky white covered the farthest expansions of his face, lightly colored lips slanted in a frown as a hand came up and smoothed out several out of place strands of hair.

'Yet given the same point, what could Raito-kun see in me? I am constantly hitting on him to the point of annoyance, I am not classically good looking and am more often blunt and too straight forward for my own good.' The frown deepened on the man's face, the years usually hidden by his boyish features highlighted by the stress lines around his mouth.

"Perhaps he deserves better..."

L stepped away from the mirror grabbing his other pair of pants from on top of the hamper and quickly pulling them on, trying to keep them as non-wrinkled as possible. The socks came next, along with the shoes...

And voila!

L brushed back his hair and straightened his posture, smirking at the radical difference in appearances.

'Maybe I do not deserve Yagami Raito now... but I will not give him up.'

"Not without a fight, Raito-kun. Not without a fight..."

* * *

Raito tapped his fingers against his leg, antsy to talk to L again. He wanted to fix this...

No. He needed to.

When had this man become such a staple in his life?

'_The moment he walked to you and spoke of his own visions... you know you've been hooked since then._'

Raito exhaled, closing his eyes lightly.

'You're right.'

And with that simple declaration, a huge weight felt as if it had been lifted off his chest.

"You're right..." Raito whispered to himself as the door to the bathrom door opened-

And out walked a completely different man than the one who had entered less than a half hour before.

Raito's eyes felt like they were about to pop out of its sockets.

"L...?"

"Yes, Raito-kun?" L asked slyly as he casually walked over to the stunned young man, dark eyes sparkling in delight. "You seem to be stuck in a state of shock."

"Uh..."

The older man tilted his head to the side as he stopped right in front of the 23 year old, a hand coming up to caress the other's soft skinned face. "Raito-kun was quite wrong in his assumptions."

Raito blushed as he attempted to look down to the floor, but L would not allow it. "Raito-kun, please look at me."

The younger artist looked up then, his gaze matching L's perfectly. Mahogany brown met midnight black as L leaned forward, gently pressing his lips against Raito's cheek, lids drooping slightly from the sudden contact. "I am looking for more than just a pretty face and perfect body to lie in bed with, Raito-kun. And I truly believe I have found that in you..."

L then smirked.

"Though the fact that you hold the first two traits does entice me as well, I must admit."

Raito's spontaneous laughter filled the room as a warmth settled in L's body at the lovely sounds of the young man's tenor voice filling the room. As the sound dimmed, Raito's smile enveloped his face, his own hand coming up to meet with L's, laying his palm on top of L's own.

"That's all I needed to hear, L."

The other man sighed as the moment slipped through their fingers, their faces coming closer together once again, this time to meet mouth to mouth-

_**"Move bitch! Get out da way! Get out da way, bitch, get out da way! Move, bitch! Get out da way! Get out da way, bitch, get out da way!"**_

Both Raito's and L's eye twitched simultaneously, for the first time ever.

"Sayu-chan certainly has some interesting song choices, Raito-kun..."

The 23 year old sweat dropped as he looked down at his cell phone, the message, _"20 minutes til Mom and Dad's! XD Feel the pain, Foo'!", _met his unfortunate gaze. "That is putting it lightly, to say the least..."

"I've been meaning to ask why Raito-kun did not answer my calls from the day before. I must have left a good ten messages..."

"I don't know! My phone just vanished the day my parents came by, and the next thing I knew, it was laying in my sock drawer, as if it had been there all along." Raito scratched his head, a look of confusion marring his features before shaking his head, clearing his mind of the whole dilemma. "But that doesn't matter. We have to get going, or else my mom will kill else if we're late."

Raito grabbed the man's hand and pulled him forward, reaching for both of their coats and leaving the apartment thereafter.

"Besides..." Raito began, a smile covering his face once again. "I think it's my turn to show you off."

L smirked as he grabbed the young man and kissed him once again, just a light peck on the mouth, before they both walked out of the complex and began climbing into Raito's car.

"So, Raito-kun realizes that since we have all our emotions out in the clear, I will not be holding back tonight in front of his family, correct?"

CRASH!

"... ... ... Hm. Guess that's a yes."

"Ssssssss... Fucker..."

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Ludicris's song "Move, Bitch", which I find hilarious. Frankly, I don't care if you don't. XD

Er... this was supposed to be the dinner chapter, yet somehow it ended up becoming all gooey with feelings... my bad? Lol. But yay for relationship development! Next chapter, the real craziness ensues... be prepared. And hopefully, I'll be able to respond to reviews this time. Though, to answer a popular question, which I've been asked quite a few times so far; yes, there will be a sequel after I'm finished with DH. This story can only stretch so far into the universe I have created for these two... XD See ya soon!


	18. Dining With the Enemy

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Eighteen: _Dining With the Enemy_

* * *

"We do not have to do this, you know."

Raito blinked as the words escaped L's mouth, a somber expression actually perched on his face. "Are you serious?"

L nodded, placing his thumb on top of his lips, the childish gesture clashing horribly with his 'new look.'

Raito frowned at the thought.

"If Raito-kun does not wish for us to dine with his family, I will understand completely." L shifted slightly, noticeably uncomfortable in the tighter clothing he now wore. "I am a lot to take in at once, and your father has only met me twice, in… unpleasant circumstances, to say the least. There is a 48 percent chance that Raito's father will likely suffer through a heart attack after spending more than five minutes with me in the room, let alone dinner."

L looked Raito straight in the eye at this point, his expression still as grave as could be. "I do not wish for my father in law's death to be on my hands."

Raito's eye twitched spontaneously, his grip on the steering wheel tightening without him realizing it.

"L…"

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"Shut up and get out of the car before I decide to hurt you in front of my parent's home."

"Hm… is that a promise?"

"Get out of the damn car, you over-excited raccoon!"

L pouted as he exited the car, Raito shaking his head in shame.

As the younger man let his foot hit the paved ground, a sense of foreboding overcame his senses, making him feel as if he had just signed his death warrant down to the magical wonderland known as Hell.

'One last gay hurrah for me, it seems…'

"Raito-kun must hurry it up! I have not been able to grope him for the whole drive over here, and must do so now as to not scar your family's eyes!"

CRASH!

Sigh. "Raito-kun is so clumsy."

"L… bastard… STOP TRYING TO GRAB MY ASS!"

"… … … But it is just there."

Bitch Slap of Untold Peril!

Raito got up from his lovely spot on the driveway and roughly grabbed L's free hand, pulling the older man towards the door.

"Ow… Raito-kun must stop hitting my head so much…" The 23 year old's eye twitched as he reached a hand up and gently knocked the door, a sudden eerie grin stretching itself across L's face, his dark eyes gleaming in unspoken delight. "Of course, Rai-chan is welcome to spank my other hea-"

"RAITO! RYUUZAKI! THANK YOU FOR COMING OVER!" A booming voice interrupted L's train of thought as both men were suddenly pulled inside, Yagami Soichirou looking as if he had just escaped the wrath of Satan…

He had not idea who he was dealing with yet.

"Woah! Hot duds, Ryuuzaki-kun!" Sayu pranced down the stairs once the door was unceremoniously slammed shut, Soichirou automatically leaving the scene looking as uncomfortable as humanly possible. Both men slipped off their shoes at the door and met Sayu halfway, a smile overcoming her own face.

"Thank you, Sayu-chan." A white long sleeved button up shirt clung slightly to L's thinly muscled figure, fitted stone washed jeans accentuating his athletic legs. (Raito didn't even know the man went outside for long periods of time!)

Disheveled obsidian locks, actually combed for once, hung over brightened ebony colored eyes, a relaxed smile laying on the older man's lips making him look younger than he actually was. His posture was even straighter, though not ram-rod straight as most would expect when standing. L reached an arm over Raito's shoulders, the younger of the two rolling his eyes at the show of affection… even if he thought it was cute himself.

"I wanted to make a good impression for Raito-kun's sake."

"Oh, you made an impression, alright…" Raito muttered with his arms crossed against his chest, his father's horrified face coming to mind as Sayu began leading them into the living room, where Soichirou himself sat uncomfortably.

"Well, I've got to go help mom finish with dinner, so why don't you guys sit down here?" Sayu skipped off into the kitchen, leaving the disturbed father, the overly enthusiastic pervert and the willing victim of said pervert alone…

'Oh fuck. Is that the shit finally hitting the fan, I hear? Because I think it is…'

"Yagami-san looks so tense." L stated unnecessarily as both he and Raito sat down on the other end of the couch, L nearly laying on top of Raito's lap with how close he chose to sit next to him.

Father/Son Eye Twitch of Creeped-Outness.

"Ryuuzaki…" Raito warned with a small hindering breath.

"I only say that because he looks as if he has something stuck up his behind… though I wouldn't mind sticking something up your behind-"

"GAH!"

"Ryuuzaki! Show some respect!"

"I apologize, of course."

"Er… well…"

"Hmm… I have to ask, Yagami-san."

Sigh. "Yes, Ryuuzaki?"

"You accept my relationship with your son, correct?"

"I wouldn't have you in my house, otherwise."

"What makes you the most uncomfortable about it?"

"Ryuuzaki, please leave my father alone."

"I just… never expected…"

"Does your son disgust you?"

"No!"

"I see… is it because your son is the probable uke in the relationship, then? It's quite alright, though. There's no shame in taking it up the ass. From what I hear, it's quite enjoyable."

_DOUBLE CRASH!_

L blinked as he stared down at two nearly identical prone figures laying on the floor, a revelation finally being realized within his 'great genius' mind.

"Oh… so it's hereditary!"

Raito picked himself up, a murderous gleam lighting up his honey brown eyes-

_Couch Pillow Slam!_

"What have I told you about talking about things like that! Ground rules, remember the damn ground rules!"

And then he sweat dropped.

Raito really needed a stiff drink…

'_Hah! Stiff, indeed…_'

Oh, what the hell had he been thinking coming here tonight?

"Hey you guys! Mom wanted me to ask if any of you wanted anything to drink!" Sayu chirped happily, ignoring the glare on her father's face and the innocent (perverted) expression on L's own visage, staring right at Raito's face.

"Whatever you have that will make me very drunk…" Raito muttered out, not paying attention to the malicious grin overcoming the young girl's face. It was at times like this that Raito actually praised the young girl's ability to read his mind…

"Coming right up, George Michaels!"

To only be reminded just why he hated her to begin with.

"Drunk…" L suddenly parroted, a smirk curling around his lips as Soichirou's face darkened at the other man's obvious train of thought.

"STOP LOOKING AS IF YOU'RE READY TO MOLEST MY SON! NOW!"

L pouted for a moment, but then brightened almost immediately.

"With all due respect, Yagami-san, I think I'm past the point of molesting. Does he mind if I take him upstairs and-"

"No."

"Not even to-"

"No."

"What about if I-"

"I said no, damn it!"

L sighed once again.

"You Yagami Men like to cut me off before I can even start... Woe is the life of a man that can not even get laid by their own sexy lovers."

"Here you go, Raito!" Sayu handed the 23-year-old a shot of… something as Raito quickly downed the drink without a second thought.

'What the fuck…'

"Keep 'em coming, Sayu… keep 'em coming…"

Sayu grabbed the shot glass before turning around. "I'm sure Ryuuzaki will have you doing that a whole lot later on…" She giggled to herself as she began walking out of the room.

"What?"

"Nothing! I'll get you that other drink now…"

Raito blinked to himself, having sworn he heard her cackle as she left the room... though that could have been the affects of the drink.

Either way…

'I must be adopted. I must be adopted. I must be… Because I cannot possibly be related to these psychos.'

"Father-san should stop yelling so much. He could suffer from cardiac arrest and die."

"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!"

"Father-san's hearing is also going out, along with my own. See, father-san? You should calm down."

"Gr… you are so asking for an ass whooping…"

"Though I can definitely see where Rai-chan gets his screaming abilities from. By any chance, would father-san know if Rai-chan is just as vocal in bed?"

"GGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Onii-chan! Here you go!"

Gulp.

'Oh sweet Lord, help me if you actually exist.'

"Look, Raito! I brought you a couple more, just incase you wanted those too!"

Gulp.

Double gulp.

Triple gulp.

Was it just him, or was his vision getting a bit blurry?

"Alright everyone, dinner's ready!" Sachiko's voice rang throughout the house as she entered the living room, not knowing of the havoc that was being unleashed at the moment. Everyone stopped and stared as Sachiko smiled at the group. "Sorry about the wait."

Quadruple gulp.

'Look at all the pretty horses…'

* * *

"So…"

"Yeah…"

"How about them Giants?"

"What?"

"You know…"

"No. Get back to the right country, please."

"This is really good, mom!"

"Thank you, Raito."

"Raito, you're holding the fork the wrong way."

"Huh?"

"How much did you have to drink, Raito-kun?"

"Just a 'lil…"

Clack.

_CRASH!_

"Oopsies…"

Stare.

"I can definitely clean that."

Eye twitch.

"Stop looking in the direction of my son's crotch…"

Tightened voice. "Please."

Pout. "Can I not even stare at my boyfriend's crotch anymore…"

"Do you want a closer look?! Tee-hee…"

Zip.

"NO! NO HE DOES NOT!"

Zip.

"Says who?! Raito-kun, I would prefer a closer look!"

"Raito..."

"But daaaaaaaaaaaad…"

"I said-Raito! What the hell are you doing?!"

Climb.

"I think Rai-chan should just get off the chair…"

"STRIP! STRIP! STRIP! STRIP!"

"SAYU!?"

"Dad, we need some more hot, sexy, dirty guy on guy action here. If it disturbs you, leave the room. Otherwise, shut your mouth and watch the show! WOO-HOO!"

O.O

"Wha…?"

"Oh dear... I think your father has gone catatonic again..."

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Raito-kun should start with his shirt and then work his way down."

"Like this?"

Strip.

Swing, swing.

"Yayz!"

"Have I ever mentioned how much I loved Raito-kun when he's drunk? Because I do. Very much so."

"Take it off, bro! Take it off!"

"GOD DAMN IT! RAITO, GET DOWN HERE AND BE VIRTUOS! DON'T MAKE ME GET THE CHASTITY BELT OUT!"

"Can I strip out of that too?"

"No!…"

"Yes… most definitely."

"No body asked you, you big pervert."

"I think we should all settle down-"

"In fact, this is all your fault, Ryuuzaki!"

"Wha-GAH!"

"Ryuuzaki-kun!"

"Oh noes! I'll save… you… Ryuu-chan…"

Dead Faint.

Everyone then stared over at Raito's now prone body, sweat dropping concurrently.

"Uh…" L tapped Soichirou's arm, gesturing for him to take his hands off his neck. The older man did so, his eye still twitching as he turned towards his son. "I think I shall take him to his apartment now."

"Oh… we didn't even get to finish dinner." Sachiko looked over at her son worriedly before standing up and kneeling beside him. "Poor thing…"

"I'm sure he'll be fine!" Sayu grinned as she nudged her father out of L's way, smirking as he hefted the body up and grabbed the younger man's car keys from his pocket. "I had a wonderful time at dinner. We should most definitely do this again."

Father Eye Twitch.

"Of course! You and Rai-chan are welcome in this house anytime! Our home is your home, Ryuuzaki-kun. Isn't that right, Soichirou."

Eye Twitch.

Snarl.

"Yes, dear."

L grinned. "Goodbye everyone."

Sayu smirked as L dragged the younger artist's body out of the house.

'Oh, he's gonna have fun tonight, alright… Mwahahahahahaha…'

"Don't miss your chance this time, Ryuuzaki! I'm counting on you to finish the deed!"

L waved as he finally exited the house, door closing in the process.

"What do you mean by that, Sayu?"

"Oh, nothing…"

Sayu laughed the whole way up to her room, awaiting the juicy details L was sure to share tomorrow morning.

* * *

"Mmm…" L looked over at the seat next to him, smiling gently as Raito's eyes opened blearily. "Ow… my head…"

"Now you know how I feel. Perhaps this will make up for all the times Rai-chan has smacked me upside my head…"

"Shut up, you." Raito felt the back of his cranium, wincing in pain as he did so. "I didn't think I fell so hard."

"Well, now Raito-kun knows better than to start stripping in front of his family members on top of a chair, of all things."

Raito flushed a crimson red as he thought back on the night. He crossed his bare arms over his naked chest, a slight chill running down his spine as cold air hit his skin. "I can't help it. I get kinda frisky when I'm drunk. God, I am never going to be able to show my face to my father for at least a good three years…"

"I can see that Raito-kun cannot hold his liquor, and trust me, I am not complaining. And do not worry about your father, you are clearly exaggerating. From what I can see, he simply gets embarrassed easily. Now, here." L handed the younger man a light jacket that had been in the back seat of the car, Raito covering himself up with it. "What happened to my shirt, anyways?"

"Raito-kun does not want to know."

Sweat drop.

"Right… and you do realize that my father hates you now, correct?"

"Yes. But that just makes life more interesting, does it not?"

"Only you would think that way, L."

"Hm… yes. I would be the only one. By the way, Raito-kun. How are you feeling?"

"Err… will beside the bump on my head and the drowsiness and slight headache from the alcohol, I suppose I feel fine…"

"Good." L smiled creepily as he continued to drive on. Raito did not like the look on his face WHATSOEVER!

"L… you do realize this isn't the way to my apartment."

"I know."

"… … … … should I be scared?"

L's grin widened even further.

"Yes…" Raito answered his own question, eyes wide with trepidation. "I think I should be."

* * *

O.O; Lol! I think I just killed my own brain... all for amusement purposes, of course. XD Unpredictable? Oh, that doesn't even cover the half of it... And for the whole 'father-san' thing, that is L literally saying 'father' in English instead of otou-san. I just thought it would be funnier that way.


	19. In the Heat of the Moment

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Nineteen: _In the Heat of the Moment_

* * *

The thoughts in Raito's head felt jumbled, much from the effect of the amount of alcohol he had managed to consumed (Sayu practically serving it on a silver platter, of course) and a small bit from the gentle flutters emanating from his poor abused stomach, which he knew he could definitely blame on L. (Even if the bastard didn't know it!)

'Of all the people to feel this way for, it just had to be the perverted freak my family has officially fallen in love with... or in my father's case, hate with a complete unadulterated passion.'

Raito turned his head slightly to the side, gazing at the man slumped over in the driver's seat as the dim light reflected off his obsidian eyes, making them look lighter than they normally would during the day. Unkempt locks, once combed, blew slightly from the wind coming from L's open window, half hazardously slanting over the man's eyes in cheeks, accentuating his extremely pale skin. His shirt was now rumpled and undone, a couple of stains from dinner evident on the shirt's once white surface, as hands barely clenched the steering wheel in mock-concentration.

The 23-year-old blinked trying to gather his thoughts as the car caught another pot hole, making him recoil within himself...

On second thought, the bumpy car ride probably was not helping his thinking abilities either.

"Rai-chan looks a bit flushed... would he like me to pull over so that he may vomit in peace?" L chirped rather cheerfully as Raito flushed in further.

Gurgle...

L really knew just what **not** to say in any given situation.

"I don't feel sick, jack ass. I just... don't feel 100 percent great, is all."

Even if the churning in his stomach at the sight of L's concerned face said otherwise.

"Raito-kun does not have to worry if he is holding back for my sake-"

"What?"

"I would make out with him even if his breath smelt of stomach acids and alcohol."

A slightly disturbed look covered Raito's drowsy face as he stared at L unabashedly.

'The sad thing is... I don't know if I should be disgusted by that comment, or flattered by it.' Raito thought to himself as the car began to slow down, nothing but trees and dirt pave ways encompassing the young artist's sight.

"L...?"

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"Where are we?"

L smirked as he exited the car, not even looking at the sandy-haired young man as he did so. Raito blinked distortedly as he slipped the cloth off his lap and quickly pulled the light jacket over his shoulders and stumbled out of the car, awkwardly glancing around the wooded area in confusion.

The older man grabbed Raito's arm, smiling at the adorable picture the semi-drunk man made. 'You are all mine tonight, Raito-kun...'

"Just follow me, Rai-chan. You will enjoy the trip, I promise."

The 23 year old nodded absently as he tripped over a couple of rocks and sticks, gripping L's arm in order to keep himself steady. L's smirk widened at the gesture, his own grip tightening as well.

"You're not gonna rape me in the middle of the forest, are you?"

L laughed quite suddenly, the remark actually managing to catch him off guard. "Are you serious, Raito-kun?"

Raito blinked once again.

"I don't know what lack of sex will do to you. For all I know, you've been molesting little bunny rabbits in your spare time since I haven't been putting out."

"Nice way of being coy about it, Rai-chan."

"You're welcome."

"When did I say thank you?"

Raito smirked before turning to the elusive artist and pulling him towards him, their bodies crashing together unexpectedly.

"Oomph!"

A mouth (a very talented mouth) covered L's, arms escaping the loosening grasp as they worked their magic on the older man. Stifled gasps flooded the night air as Raito's tongue lightly caressed the other's appendage before playfully pulling back from the kiss. L looked at the boy a bit dazed, disappointment filling his eyes as he lightly pouted.

"See? You're welcome." Raito giggled at the downtrodden look on his boyfriend's face.

"Is Raito-kun going to be a tease, again? Because I do not think I will be able to take much more of this..."

Raito blushed as he brought his face to L's neck and nuzzled the flesh there, leaving a small kiss. "What if I said I didn't want to tease anymore...?"

L's eyes widened.

'Hot damn, and here I thought I would I have to convince him...'

"Err..."

"I want you too, L."

"Please tell me this is not the alcohol speaking."

Raito huffed out a breath as he glared up at L's face. "I might be a bit tipsy, but I'm not as bad as before. Therefore, you should totally take advantage of the situation before I change my mind and-mmph!"

L liked putting Raito's mouth to good uses, and kissing was definitely up there in the top three things he was pretty damn sure it was good at.

'Though I can definitely think of somewhere else he can put those deliciously pouty lips...'

A moan cut through the air as Raito once again clung to L's shoulders, both aching to dominate the kiss as neither conceded defeat. The older of the two finally began to move forward, Raito not noticing until he was backed up against a tree, letting out a hiss of pain as both of their bodies became entangled against one another.

"Ow."

"Sorry..." L breathed out as he dove back in, wanting to taste more of the boy's sweet lips, the taste of bitter alcohol still hanging off Raito's tongue. Clothed groins clashed against each other as both suddenly broke apart and gasped, eyes staring heatedly into the other's as they mimicked the same motion yet again, Raito's head thumping against the tree bark with an audible thump as he briefly closed his eyes, not noticing the slight rumble of footstep coming towards them.

"L, sir? Is that yo-Oh, mother fucking shit!"

Afro Jiggle of Tension!

"Uh..." Aizawa blinked as two sets of different colored eyes glared in his direction, obviously not ashamed at being caught in such a compromising position, but not pleased about it either. "I just... uh... everything is all set over here, L. I'll just be... going now. And wash my eyeballs with bleach and look at some very explicit girl-on-girl porn to get rid of these oh so disturbing images in my head. Yeah... that sounds good. Definitely very good."

The amazingly stylish afro haired man dazedly left the two men, walking away from the scene with an awkward expression on his face.

"I don't get paid enough for this shit..."

"Ahem..." L hesitantly pulled away from the younger man as Raito pouted cutely, grabbing his hand to pull him forward once again. "Let us see if we can make it to our destination without attempting to dry hump each other this time, Rai-chan."

Raito rolled his eyes. "Whatever... Where are we, anyway?"

"A private section of land that I own."

"That you OWN?"

"Raito-kun knows that my paintings go for extremely high bids. What do you think I do with all my money?"

"Spend it on insane amounts of sugar and kinky porn."

L grinned.

"That is only for part of my fortune. The rest, I actually try to use smartly."

"Oh, joy. Now why are we here? Are you sure you're not gonna rape me and then leave my broken body in the woods?"

L gave Raito an exasperated stare. "I do not think it is considered rape when the other person in the party consents to it. And just why would I leave Rai-chan's body anywhere other than with myself? Especially while he is naked?"

Raito sweat dropped. "You got me there. So...?"

"I got to thinking after you spoke to me about the dinner a couple of nights ago, and knew that this night would be... stressful to say the least."

From the look on Raito's face, stressful was a gross understatement.

L had to agree there.

"So, I thought that a night away from any and all distractions would be appropriate. Tonight was certainly a learning experience when it comes to Raito-kun's family..."

The younger man's eyes widened as L gestured towards a clearing within the woods, a large woven blanket strewn across the grass. Multiple small tea lights lay scattered around it, enhancing the romantic aura as a bottle of wine and two glasses stood precariously on top of a basket that sat next to the blanket.

Raito sweat dropped once again.

"You're not trying to be subtle in the least, are you?"

"Have I ever, Raito?" The young man blushed at the lack of the affectionate honorific as L lead them into the clearing, setting Raito down on top of the blanket as L straddled over him playfully. "I do not think I would be me otherwise, Rai-chan."

Raito chuckled as fully laid back and gazed into the other man's eyes, a smile reaffirming itself on the 23 year old's face. "I have to ask, L, because it's been bugging me for awhile..."

"Yes, Raito?"

"Why me?" The artist's head tilted downward as an unfamiliar look of bashfulness clouded his visage, L silently basking in its cuteness. "I know I'm cute, don't get me wrong, but what was so special about me that you actually felt you could tell me the truth about yourself?"

L stared into the boy's eyes, a small smile pasted on his own lips. "It was your eyes, really."

Raito blinked.

"What?"

"I said, it was your-"

"I know what you said," Raito replied exasperatedly as the older man comfortably reclined over him, "I meant what did you mean by it. And this better not be some weird pick-up line, either, because I already think you're creepy enough as it is. No need to add fuel to that fire..."

"No need to snap my head off, Rai-chan. I would never dream of putting Raito through some horrible pick-up line-" L ignored the sharp look Raito sent him as he snorted disbelievingly. "And I am insulted that he would think so. What I mean, so Rai-chan can stop being so antsy and let us screw already-"

"Hey!"

"Is that there is an honesty behind his eyes, that belies his intelligence. Something genuine that other people simply cannot pull off these days... Even that first day I met you, whilst you were examining my grotesque portraits, you managed to conjure beauty of them and rationalize the paintings in a way others could not." L leaned forward, his nose merely millimeters away from Raito's as the up and coming artist stared up at him with those eyes that continued to intrigue him even now. "You saw past the facade of destruction, and automatically thought of the healing process..."

"How did you know that? I just gave you an analysis of what I thought the painting represented?"

L smirked, the eyes widening in interest. "Your eyes give you away quite easily, you know."

"Hm..."

"Though, I must say it does help that you have such a fantastic ass and gorgeous face. That certainly sealed the deal, even before I found out how smart you are."

"L!"

"Oh, you'll be screaming that in a little while."

Instead of the normal rebuke L was holding out for, a blush spread itself across Raito's face as he bit his lip.

'Oh fuck...' L thought in excitement.

"If you say so..." The younger man whispered as he shifted slightly and shrugged off the light jacket, leaving him shirtless underneath the obsidian eyed man. A falsely innocent smile teased L as his eyes widened in anticipation, the feeling of silky skin beneath his finger tips causing his breath to speed up slightly. "Oh, I say so."

The same lips that often captivated him parted beneath his own as L swiftly lowered his head, once again engaging in a never ending battle for dominance. Cool hands trailed around L's waist and up his shirt as the 23 year old's legs parted and allowed for the older man to comfortably settle in between them. A small mewl escaped Raito's mouth as they attempted to get closer to each other without success.

Without warning, L ripped his lips away from Raito's and quickly unbuttoned his shirt, nearly popping a few buttons in his haste to get out of the damn shirt. Hazy lust filled chocolate brown eyes watched amused as the man twisted out of the shirt and smirked down at the prone figure underneath him.

Swift fingers began to explore the pale expanse of skin now available to them as L leaned down and began to kiss down Raito's neck, slowly licking and suckling his way down the younger man's neck and shoulder. The insomniac's own hands traced Raito's abdomen, reaching further until he got to the brunette's chest, slowly tracing one of the nipples as his lover moaned under his gentle ministrations.

"L..."

"Yes, Raito?" L murmured from a particular sensitive patch of skin on Raito's shoulder.

"Didn't think you'd be the warm and cuddly type."

L smiled slyly as he brought his head up next to the man's ear, blowing a small breath of air as he relished in the shiver that escaped the body trapped beneath his own. "I think I shall save the more animalistic side of me until the next time we do this..." L gently bit the shell of the ear before recapturing the man's lips while simultaneously reaching down and unbuttoning Raito's pants. L stared at the face below his own unabashedly as he continued to devour Raito's taste, delighting in the flush _he _had caused. Watching in satisfaction as the 23 year old's eyelids fluttered in contentment as more muffled groans were heard. L began to pull the pants off of the boy, Raito lifting his hips up once he noticed what it was L was attempting to do.

Shoes were kicked off as the pair of pants were thrown aside, leaving the younger man in just a pair of boxers, shivering as a light breeze blew over the both of them. Fingers lightly played with the band of the auburn haired man's underwear, L not wasting any time in slowly peeling off the last material between him and that luscious body beneath him.

Raito blushed an extreme scarlet red as L gazed down at his now nude body, the material of cloth dangling between two fingers as ebony eyes widened at the sight granted to them.

"How come I'm naked while you still get to have clothes on?" Raito pouted cutely, L finally anchoring himself to reality at the sound of the smooth tenor voice. Without a second thought, L ripped off his pants and almost tore his boxers off in an effort to get out of the restrictive clothing.

Raito laughed inwardly at the sight.

'Can't say he's not enthusiastic...'

"Is Rai-chan satisfied now?" And there stood L in all his glory...

Jeez, he would never get over the shock of how huge that thing was!

"I'll be satisfied once you get over here and fuck me. So what the hell are you waiting for?"

L grinned as he dove back on top of Raito bare flesh rubbing against bare flesh as the sensation bringing a completely new level of euphoria to the mix. Raito wrapped his legs around L's body, mewling as the older man ground against him. A hand began to stroke Raito's manhood, his stiffened member hardening even further as Raito buried his face into the crook of L's shoulder. "L... god, don't stop."

The artist above him shook his head, sweat beginning to glisten a bit on his forehead as he rolled his hips, his own erection rubbing against Raito's entrance. "Please tell me... you're prepared?" Raito slowly breathed out as L muttered out a strangled yes in anticipation and reached out for the basket with his free hand, his other still pleasuring the delicious man below him. He clumsily pulled the basket closer so as to not lose the momentum, loving the way Raito began to writhe underneath him, and pulled out the lubricant he had picked out for this occasion.

Oh, his prayers had finally been answered.

Before Raito could get a chance to cum, L abruptly stopped in his pleasuring, the young man glaring up at him at the sudden stop. L shakily grinned down at him before kissing him once again, slathering his hands with the slippery substance and generously coating his fingers especially. L brought up the boy's thighs, slowly slipping a hand down and slipping in two fingers within the tight canal. Raito let out a strangled moan as he pushed down against the intrusion, searching for that one spot-

"Ah..."

L pulled them out then, only to forcibly push them back in, searching for that pleasure center once again. Raito met his fingers thrust for thrust, L deciding after the forth pull to add in another finger. He closed his eyes, listening to the escalating moans and groans coming from the incredibly handsome man basically riding his hand. But this wasn't enough. He didn't want his lust-ridden lover to just get off from this.

At least not now.

The fingers pulled out completely, Raito breathed in deeply as he stared up the man above him, the moment wearing him thin. L rubbed more lubricant onto his member before positioning himself towards the slightly more relaxed entrance, gazing into Raito's eyes... taking in this moment for all it was worth. Without warning, the older man pushed himself half way in, groaning at the tight feel of it as Raito squirmed in discomfort.

"Damn... it..."

L held in a breath as he allowed the other man to get used to his size, Raito's face contorting into one of slight pain as he tried to relax his body once again. He took a deep breath, gently pushing against the slick intrusion as a small moan escaped his lips. "L... move, damn it."

The artist nodded dumbly as he licked his lips and pushed in further, the pain diminishing a small bit, but not quite enough. "Just... keep going..."

He continued on, pushing himself all the way in with just a rock of his hips, Raito's sudden gasp making him blink.

'So... tight...'

"God... right... there..."

L pulled back a bit, only to roughly push back into the same spot, another moan granted as his reward.

"Remember... when I told you to move?"

L nodded vacantly.

"Well... who told you to stop?"

The older man didn't need much more of an invitation as he then grasped the narrow hips and captured Raito's lips as he began to push in and out of the boy's tight embrace. The delicious friction between the two bodies told of such intense pleasure, L grabbing hold of Raito's dripping member and pumping it again, the thrusts against the lithe body beneath him increasing in pace Raito began to squirm once again, this time lifting his arms and pulling himself up as to be closer to the body above him.

"L... damn it... just-"

Raito gasped as L hefted him up and slammed them both to the ground, the sensation of the fall and L simultaneously pounding into him while quickly fondling him driving the boy into ecstasy overload. "Don't-just... don't stop!"

Hips moved alongside hips as both lost themselves to the pleasure of the other's body, eyes drowsily drunk off the other's own lust filled gazes as both felt themselves close to completion.

"Rai-chan, I'm... close..."

"Me... me..."

The painful groan flickered in the back of the man's head as he lost himself within the pleasure, his prostate hit one last time forcefully before he came against L's firm stomach, his muscles clenching against L's member. A chocked sound escaped L's lips as Raito felt something trickle within him and opened his eyes as a pair of dark eyes gazed adoringly down at him. Raito sleepily smiled as the older man slowly slumped against him, not noticing as L reached into the basket once more, pulling out another blanket and draping it rather precariously over their exhausted figures.

"L...?"

"Yes, Raito?"

"We have to do this again."

L smirked as he pulled out of the young man, snuggling against him as Raito wrapped his arms around his chest.

"Most definitely, Rai-chan. Without a shadow of a doubt..."

They both fell asleep, the night air tickling them as they lay contently beneath the warmth of the blanket and the other's body heat, neither caring to notice their surroundings as they escaped into the oblivion of their dreams.

* * *

Holy smokes, Batman! ((Munches on Chocolate Pocky)) Welp, satisfied? Lol! Can you tell it's my first lemon? Mucho gracias to Kitsune55 for beta-ing this chapter. She had to suffer through reading this in it's first draft form. The horror.


	20. So Close, and Yet So Far

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty: _So Close, and Yet So Far_

* * *

"_**Near… far… WHEREVER YOU ARE! I believe that the heart does go on…"**_

Milk chocolate brown eyes snapped open as a hellishly high tone smacked him out of unconsciousness. Pricks of pain shot up Raito's smooth spine as he blinked hazily. 'Oh, fuck me…'

'_Someone's already done that apparently. I think your sore ass is proof of that-' _

'SHUT THE FUCK UP! Stupid subconscious…' Raito snarled as he achingly pulled himself up, only to be stopped by two very pale, very strong arms wrapped around his midsection.

"_**Once… more… YOU OPEN THE DOOR! And you're here in my heart, and my heart will go on-"**_

"L…" Raito whispered as he half-heartedly attempted to wake the apparently zonked out artist. 'Who would have thought sex would knock the poor man out!'

"L!"

"_**And OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!"**_

"_L!"_

Snort. "Wha-!"

"Gah!"

"Raito-kun?!"

"L, get the hell off of my thigh!"

"… … … Why?" L gave the younger man a suggestive look as he leaned forward ever so slowly.

Raito sweat dropped.

"Because-"

"_**There is some love that will not go away… YOU'RE HERE-" **_

"That's why."

"_**THERE'S NOTHING TO FEAR! And I know that my heart will go-" **_

"Ah… I see Raito-kun's point now. Here." L moved off Raito's leg as the still sleepy caramel haired man reached over and searched his pockets until he found the offending object. 'Yay for you, Sayu. You manage to ruin just about everything without even having to be here to do so. You get a gold fucking star for the rest of the fucking day.'

"Hello?"

"YAGAMI-KUN!"

"Er… Matsuda. Why are you yelling?"

"I'M AT THE AIRPORT PICKING UP MY GRANDMOTHER, AND CAN BARELY HEAR A THING! I NEED TO SPEAK TO YAGAMI-KUN ABOUT SOMETHING EXTREMELY IMPORTANT CONCERNING HIS MEETING NEXT WEEK!"

"… … … Then why don't you just call me when you're _not_ at the airport, so that you don't have to keep yelling into the phone?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

While both Matsuda and Raito were having their daily awkward silences and 'Oh my God, why the hell did I pick your dumb ass for a manager?' Raito moments, L had inconspicuously grabbed his own pants and plucked his own cell phone out from deep within his cavernous pockets (all of which seemed to be filled with some sort of sugary substance and different flavored condoms) and flipped it open without a second thought.

He immediately opened his text messaging system and began to rapidly, if discretely, type.

_**Plan definitely a success.**_

_**Action abounds in these pants. (Or lack thereof. XD)**_

_**Very grateful and satisfied thanks to your help.**_

_**More details later,**_

_**-Ryuuzaki**_

Click and send…

For some strange reason, Raito then felt a shiver run down his body.

'What the hell was that about?' The brunette mentally shrugged before returning to his daily call from the most moronic manager on the planet. 'It was probably nothing…'

* * *

_**Meanwhile, at that same moment…**_

Ding, ding, ding!

Sayu yawned as her phone sprang to life, her groping hand quickly slipping it off her nightstand and snapping it open without a moment's hesitation.

'Wonder who this could be so early…' The usually rambunctious girl thought drowsily as she blinked down at her screen.

Sayu's mahogany eyes glimmered in glee as she accepted the text message and rapidly read through it, as her mouth opened without any reservation-

"YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!"

Only to then proceed to bring down the neighborhood with her freakishly loud fan girly-ness.

"Sachiko, why is Sayu screaming from the top of her lungs at… 6:30 in the damn morning?"

"This is Sayu you're talking about. Do you really wanna know, Sweetie?"

"… … …"

"I didn't think so."

Sweat drop.

"GO ME! IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! GO ME! IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! TAKE THAT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR GAY ASS, DR. PHIL! I TOTALLY PWNED YOUR FRUITY TREATMENTS AND FOOLISHLY OBNOXIOUS ADVICE! WWWWWOOOOOOOTTTTTT! MAN SEX GALORE, BABY!"

Double Sweat drop.

"Ok, I really don't want to know."

"Good, dear… very good. Now go back to sleep. God knows what disasters today will bring."

"Yes, honey."

* * *

Ah yes, L did love seeing Raito as flustered as possible. The fact that Sayu was so adept at it simply made him all the happier.

'Though it definitely helps that he is so damn hot when he's embarrassed…' L grinned perversely; last night's events still vividly clear in his mind. 'Wow… I am already ready for round two. Oh Raito-kun, you are doomed to a life of getting me off, and I am going to love every second of it.'

"I mean, really Matsuda, how difficult can it be to remember one little thing?! Just call me back later, when you're not making your poor grandmother both cry and be ashamed of your idiotic tendencies!"

Click.

"I need new management…" Raito whispered under his breath as he sat up and rubbed his face with his hands, L watching amusedly as he reclined back onto the blanket.

"I agree, Raito-kun. I can already tell that Matsuda-san is a real ball buster from the number of times he has interrupted our freaky time."

Double sweat drop.

"L… just stop talking." Raito replied exasperatedly as he stretched, the wide unblemished expanse of his back in clear viewing pleasure. L rose up an obscured eyebrow and smiled slyly, his libido picking up almost immediately. (Not that it needed the pick-me-up, but that was beside the point. Raito's undeniable sexiness turned him on even when he was already turned on.)

"I can think of something else that requires no talking and more stretch-"

"Can you not think of sex for more than five minutes at a time? Did you not just wake up ten minutes ago?!" Raito glared at the older man over his shoulder as L crawled over, an innocent expression perched on his usually blank façade. "I do not know what you are talking about, Raito-kun."

"Because that boner you're sporting isn't giving you away in the least."

"… … No?"

Raito stared at the man in disbelief.

"Raito-kun could at least give a little-"

"_**R-E-S-P-E-C-T! Find out what it means to me! R-E-S-P-E-C-T! Take care, T-C-B!"**_

"That works too."

Raito glared.

"_**Sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me!" **_

Raito snapped his phone open once again, not even bothering to look over to, what he assumed would be, the perverted smile covering L's face.

"Hello… again?"

"WOOOOOOOOT!"

"Uh…"

"You totally got fucked up the ass! And guess what?! It was because of me, you little uke, you! Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah!"

"Sayu… what the fuck?!"

"So, how did you guys do it? Doggy style? Front to front? Side to side? Or did you guys just go fuck it and make up some weird sort of Kama Sutra positi-"

Click.

Eye twitch.

"L…"

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"I hate you."

"And why is that, Raito-kun?"

"… … … You know why, you ass."

L grinned once again as he reached over and wrapped his arms around Raito's naked waist, the young man leaning back within his embrace. "Rai-chan doesn't hate me."

"Maybe not _now_." Raito whispered as he coyly smiled into the crook of L's neck. "But I probably will later if you don't let me get dressed and get home. It's freaking freezing out here, L."

The older man pouted as he nuzzled Raito's neck, placing small kisses here and there. "Raito-kun…"

"L, get off."

"But Rai-chan-"

"Do you want to get laid tonight?"

"Yes. But right now would be nice, as well."

"… … Don't push your luck, Roberto, the Horny Penguin."

"What? Does that character even actually subsist?"

"With you in existence, yes. Now get off."

"I believe I've already done that already."

"L!"

"Oh… Raito-kun pulls me up, only to push me back down."

"I'll show you the real meaning of 'push you back down.'"

"Is that a promise?"

"Motherfucker!"

"Do not worry. Raito-kun's mother is safe from me, though I would most definitely fuck y-"

"Ah! If you keep this up, you are so not getting any for at least a good month!"

"... ... ... Yes sir."

* * *

Raito ran through his apartment in a haste, his mind in a complete whirlwind of confusion as he quickly grabbed his cell phone from his pocket and dialed L's number without even looking down at the phones keys.

'Shoe, shoe, shoe, shoe, shoe, shoe, shoe, I NEED MY DAMN SHOE!'

Today was the big day. Five days after the worst (and best, even if he refused to admit it) day of his life; the day all Raito's dreams would either come true... or come crashing down to the ground in a heap of un-sexiness. And really, everything including Raito was nothing but sexy, so that was just not an option.

The phone rang barely one time before the man he had been anxiously waiting for (for about three seconds) answered his call.

"Raito-kun?"

"L, where's my shoe?!"

"In your massively gigantic closet, that could quite possibly house all the homeless in Japan?"

"Grr… I checked in there, smart-ass! Obviously, it's not where I usually put my damn shoes!"

"Perhaps Raito-kun is not searching hard enough? His closet could most likely rival most of the rooms in my mansion."

"Be serious! I'm meeting with that Art Director today and I want to make a spectacular impression, you douche bag!"

"So, Raito-kun is truly being serious about his footwear. Please do not tell me that Raito-kun really only called me for the whereabouts of his misplaced footwear. Tell me you are joking, even if it is just a lie."

"… … …"

"Raito-kun."

"C'mon, L, I really need my shoe! The last time I had that specific shoe, I was with you."

With that small, very innocent sentence, the infamous perverted grin seemed to practically melt through the phone.

"I can remember what were doing, if that will help Raito-kun help find his shoes."

Sweat drop.

"No. I think I remember pretty damn well what we were doing... And let me tell you, I don't think my microwave will ever be the same after that escapade."

"Did you check to see if your shoe was in the microwave?"

Raito walked over to his microwave, a small frown marring his usually perfectly chiseled face.

"And why the hell would my shoe be-"

Click.

Caramel brown eyes widened as he glanced into the microwave and found his shoe absently twirling on the microwaveable plate.

"In the microwave."

Really, he should have known better than to even ask.

"Did Raito-kun find it?"

"Uh… how did-"

"_Just stop before you say something you'll regret. Please, do us all that much of a favor. I think we've all suffered enough at this point._"

Ah, there was that common sense he was so fond of.

'Where the hell have you been?'

'_Waiting to get laid. Now where the fuck have you been, you arrogant little prick?_'

Raito sweat dropped once again.

He was against himself no matter what the situation, it seemed.

"Ok, I've found it… where, I refuse to say." Raito replied before another smart-ass remark could come pouring out from L's lips. "I'll see you later, ok?

"But I do not wish to hang up with Raito-kun. I miss hearing his voice in the morning."

"First off, you were just here not even two hours ago."

"So?"

"Second off, you just woke up with me this morning."

"Exactly. I miss hearing Raito-kun's voice in the morning. It's incredibly sexy."

The sweat drop and face fault combined together made an incredibly awesome duo for Raito, one that worked superfluously when talking to L.

The damn pervert.

Raito grabbed his car keys and ran out the door, closing and locking it without a second thought. "I've got to go, L. If you really miss me that damn much, come and see me later alright?"

"Oh, I intend to Rai-chan."

Eye Twitch of Doom

Why did the man make even the most of harmless of sentences sound incredibly dirty?

"Goodbye L."

"Strip you later, Rai-"

Click.

Sometimes, he wondered about his own taste in men.

The young artist brushed his glossy locks away from his eyes as he revved up the ignition, bringing the car to a start whilst slowly pulling out of the driveway. Raito barely listened to the booming radio, his mind wandering from subject to subject, but, as it seemed late, his traitorous thoughts always came back to one man-

'L…'

A sigh escaped his plush lips as Raito shook his head in annoyance. He was starting to think he was obsessed.

'It's strange. I've barely known him for two months but I still don't even know what his real name is. Just a bunch of pseudonyms he uses to hide from the world. It almost makes me wonder… what he really has to hide.'

Raito pulled into a parking spot close to the museum (that amazingly had been left open) and exited his car, ready to face the man that would decide whether or not Tokyo would see more of his amazing art-

"Raito-kun."

CRASH!

"Damn it!"

"Err… oops."

"Who sneaks up on people like that, you maniacal little panda?"

L brought a thumb to his lips as he stared down at Raito's prone body on the sidewalk, a sly smile spreading across his mouth.

"Me?"

"Grr… what the hell are you doing here?" Raito demanded as he pulled himself up and brushed off the imaginary dirt clinging to his suit. L, wearing his usual rumpled white shirt and baggy jeans, looked like quite the character next to the flawlessly yummy young man next to him.

But L was the one banging said smexy man, so what the heck did he care about what others thought?

"Raito-kun said that I could come and see him later on."

"… … …"

"So here I am, later on."

"L."

"Yes, Raito-kun?"

"You're insane you know that? Insane… and perverted."

L smiled rather victoriously as he took a step forward and leaned in very closely to Raito's face.

"I know."

"Are you coming in with me then?"

"What does Raito-kun think?"

"You want to know what Raito-kun thinks? Raito-kun thinks that if Panda-chan keeps up with this little follow the leader act, he may not get laid for the next two to three weeks."

L pouted as his eyes widened, onyx orbs becoming shiny with faux-tears.

"Now Raito-kun is being unnecessarily cruel."

"Damn right. Now let's go. And don't embarrass me… or I will be forced to hurt you."

"By hurt, does Raito-kun mean spanking? Because I like it when he-"

"Mogi-san, how nice to see you again!" A heavy set man with slick dark hair nodded at Raito as bows were exchanged (Raito having to practically push L into doing so). "My manager told me you wished to discuss something's with me."

"That's correct, Yagami-san. Now if you and your… friend could please accompany me this way." L thoughtfully chewed on his thumb as both he and Raito followed the distinguished art director to his office. He wasn't really paying any real attention to his surroundings, but simply counting the seconds until he had his Rai-chan to himself again.

'Hmm… One-Mississippi, Two-Mississippi, Three-Mississippi, Four-Mississippi-'

If Raito could have heard the man's thoughts, he would have sweat dropped just at the stupidity of it all.

The other two men in the room, who actually had a reason for being there, began discussing details of the contract and what exactly would be expected of Raito and his paintings. Raito couldn't stop the large smile from blooming on his lips as his dreams were practically being laid down for him to take. 'This is real, this is real, this is real…'

L was just bored out of his mind.

'I wonder if he'll let me use the chains this time…'

And horny. He was most definitely horny.

"So… that's it?"

"That's really it, Yagami-san."

'Or maybe whipped cream… with strawberries. Mmm… Strawberries.'

"Then I think we've got a deal, Mogi-san."

"Excellent!"

'Peaches and cream… or maybe some cake! Orgasms and cake! The perfect combination.'

"Thank you so much for taking time out of your schedule to come by. Tokyo National Museum will be proud to showcase more of your work, Yagami-san."

"Of course. I'll have my manager call you immediately to stamp out anymore small details."

'Now I really want some cake. Vanilla? Chocolate? Oh… marble! With some delicious vanilla frosting with cream cheese flavoring and strawberries with chocolate syrup on top! YAY!'

"It was a pleasure, Yagami-san."

"Thank you."

'I like cake! I like cake! I really, really, really, really, rea-llllllllllllly like cake!'

"L… what are you thinking about?"

The older artist blinked as he found himself outside of the museum alongside Raito, dazed in his daydreams about cake. "Why?"

"You look like you're ready to have an orgasm, is why. Were you thinking about cake again?"

"How did Raito-kun know that?!"

"… … … Because I'm awesome."

Super Sexy Raito Hair Flip.

"Hm." Raito turned away with a slight smirk on his face, L pouting as he shuffled his feet after the man that brought his sexy back. Just as they were about to reach Raito's car, L felt his phone vibrate unexpectedly.

"_**Promiscuous girl, wherever you are, I'm all alone and it's you that I want!"**_

"Err… that's not my phone this time." Raito awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck as L plucked out his cell phone with a blink.

"_**Promiscuous boy, you already know that I'm all yours! What you waiting for?"  
**_

"Hello?"

Raito said nothing as L's face scrunched up rather unattractively and frowned, nostrils flaring strangely."

"Are you sure?"

"Uh…"

"Fine. I will be there immediately. Do not do anything rash without me there."

L quickly slammed the phone shut and turned to Raito with a blank stare, actually managing to creep the man out more than usual without being his perverted self. "I apologize, but it seems that there is something that needs my immediate attention, Raito-kun."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Raito gulped as L's gaze turned rather steely, shaking his head without another word. "Then who-"

"L! Let's get going!" Aizawa and his massive afro called out as L's Rolls Royce squealed to a stop right in front of them. "Hey, Yagami-san. Nice to see you today… with your clothes on and such."

Both men sweat dropped simultaneously.

"Yeah-"

"It's time to go, Aizawa. I will call Raito-kun at a later point in time. Please," L turned to look back at Raito's form as he began to enter the car, that perpetually empty gaze giving him the once over rather annoyingly, "do not attempt to contact me before then."

"But-"

"Goodbye, Raito-kun."

And without so much of a blink, L sat down in the backseat and left his lover standing in the middle of the street, wondering what the hell just happened.

'Did I… just get ditched? WHAT THE FUCK?!'

"Did I just miss something here?"

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion (the Queen of Over-Exaggeration), "Respect" by Aretha Franklin (the Queen of Soul, Bitches!), or "Promiscuous" by Nelly Furtado (Featuring Timbaland) (who is just the Queen of Annoying).

Many thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing this chapter! Next chapter should be out soon... kind of... ish. ((whistles)).


	21. Under the Same Gray Sky

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-One: _Under the Same Gray Sky_

* * *

"_It's time to go, Aizawa. I will call Raito-kun at a later point in time. Please," L turned to look back at Raito's form as he began to enter the car, that perpetually empty gaze giving him the once over rather annoyingly, "do not attempt to contact me before then."_

Raito blankly gazed at a stain that lay on the (unsanitary) table of the shady restaurant he now resided, a cup of black, sugarless coffee sitting beside him untouched.

Was it sad that he already missed the big pervert?

'_You are such a little bitch. What's it been, two hours? If that?!_'

'Shut up, you ass-hole.'

'_Oh, aren't you a tough guy, calling yourself an ass-hole. Would you like some bravado with that crazy?_'

'Hm… you are an entity onto yourself, you know that? A dumb-ass entity, but an entity nonetheless.'

'_And Mc-Crazy was his name-o…_'

Raito tuned himself out, trying to pull his thoughts together before he finally went off the deep end and start acting like **Mikami** of all people.

Raito shuddered, managing to creep himself out without even trying to.

'Now for that, I should just bitch slap myself in the face…'

Raito actually thought about it-

'Nah. My gorgeous face is too sexy to hit.'

Only to discard the thought a second later.

Truthfully, the young man didn't know how to react to the sudden departure of his raven haired lover, considering he was the one that was usually doing the exiting. In fact, Raito was down right dumbfounded by the situation.

'But, he probably won't keep me waiting for too long, right?' Raito rested his arms on the table as doubts began to bubble up in the back of his mind. Mahogany eyes gazed blankly at the scene in front of them; couples eating together, couples smiling at each other, couples kissing each other, and…

Oh shit.

Raito's eyes widened as strangely explicit images conjured themselves up within his head as he turned his head and stared down at the stained tabletop.

Now who was the sexually depraved one?

'_Two hours. I repeat, two hours. You seriously need some counseling._'

Raito wouldn't disagree with that one.

"Yagami-kun!"

Raito blinked out of his reverie as a pair of dark brown eyes encased his vision, a goofy smile making him cringe in horror.

"Matsuda…"

Oh, if only Raito could get rid of all the buffoons that surrounded him.

What a happy man he would be.

"Aw… Yagami-kun looks so depressed." Matsuda pouted as he plopped onto the chair next to the moody artist, waving a waiter over so that he could order. "I haven't seen you act this way since you met-"

"Could we please not bring… _him_ up?" Raito sputtered out, gripping the coffee cop now cradled within his hands rather tightly. "I already have a headache just by seeing _you _today, letting alone opening up that crazy can of worms."

"Alright." Matsuda agreed rather quickly, a concerned look etching itself across his face. Raito grunted as the manager began speaking about… something.

Raito didn't really pay attention to Matsuda when he spoke, especially when he was already in an agitated enough mood.

"_**Blah, blah, blah, whatever, whatever, whatever, pie is yummy, yadda, yadda, yadda, I'm not getting laid, does Yagami-kun know anybody that is available? Oh, yay, pie!**_**"**

As much as Raito hated to admit it, that was pretty much the gist of it, 99 percent of the time.

The chocolate eyed artist sighed as Matsuda yammered on, thinking back how crappy his day was turning out to be once again.

_L quickly slammed the phone shut and turned to Raito with a blank stare, actually managing to creep the man out more than usual without being his perverted self. "I apologize, but it seems that there is something that needs my immediate attention, Raito-kun."_

'Needs his immediate attention, huh?' The 23-year-old kept his eyes on the coffee cup in front of them, his mind on another planet. 'I guess I've got to respect his need for privacy. Don't want to be one of those overbearing boyfriends that stalks them and leaves weird notes on their doors.'

Once again, Mikami came into his mind unbidden as Raito suppressed another shiver.

He really needed to get some new fans.

"What do you think, Yagami-kun?" Matsuda gave Raito an expectant look as the young man blinked, his attentions once again focused in on his manager.

"Whatever you say, Matsuda."

And that was all Raito said before he laid down his money and got up from his chair. "I've got to get going now-"

"But we've only talked for five minutes?!"

"And that's five minutes I'll never be able to get back, thanks. I'll see you later, alright? Anything else we can discuss over the phone."

The anxious manager watched his client silently leave the restaurant in a daze, barely noticing the other people around him.

"Yagami-kun… I hope you're ok."

He then proceeded to eat some pie.

* * *

Raito sighed as he sat down on one of the many benches the park he was residing had to offer and stared up at the darkening sky.

Three hours…

And no phone calls to show for it.

'Oh fucking hell, if this keeps up, I think I'm going to go crazy.'

"Yagami Raito?"

A feminine voice tinkled within his ears, familiarity sparking almost immediately afterwards.

"Wait…" Raito blinked a woman of medium height, short dark hair twirled over dark brown eyes smiled down at him. "Takada Kiyomi, right? We used to have Lit. class together in college."

"You remembered! I didn't think you would, considering how absorbed you were in all your classes." The young woman giggled as she calmly sat down, the picture perfect example of normality.

Raito almost forgot what normal actually looked like.

"It's been awhile since college…" Kiyomi smiled over at the artist, before pausing her reminiscence and frowning. "Is something the matter? You look kind of…"

"Like crap?"

"Well… yeah."

Raito grinned as he leaned back on the bench and soaked up the dying sun's rays. "I've just had a lot on my mind, is all."

"You mean after being out-ed on national television?"

"… … … WHAT?!"

"Er.."

"What do you mean by that?!"

"Uh…" Kiyomi shifted uncomfortably as Raito's eyes widened to the point of falling out, his mouth down to the grassy floor. "It's been all over the news. 'Police chief's artist son is a total fruitcake.' I believe is what they've been saying. I haven't reported on it, but-"

"I think… I'm going crazy. Yes, that must be it. Crazy."

"It's not that bad, really!"

"People are calling me a fruitcake, and who knows what the hell else! I think that's bad enough as it is, thanks! Dear sweet mother of all that's good in this world, what if my father sees a broadcast like that?!"

* * *

_**Meanwhile… in the Yagami Household…**_

"WWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT??"

Sachiko sighed as she continued to wash the dishes, her husband glued to the front of the television as he brought the sound up fifteen notches.

"_You heard it here first, folks. Yagami Raito, up and coming artist and son of Police Chief, Yagami Soichirou, has been rumored to be a complete fruit basket of gayness! The rumors began in Tokyo National Museum, where Yagami Raito has his newest collection of artistry posted for all to see. Apparently, patrons within the gallery heard him speaking of kinky gay sex and orgies over his cell phone, igniting the fire of questions towards his translucent sexual-"_

"GOD DAMN YOU, TELEVISION AND NEWS CREW! GOD DAMN YOU TO HELL!!"

The exasperated wife simply sighed as she continued to wash dishes, ignoring the spastic yells coming from her living room.

She dreaded to think what her poor son was going to do once her husband got a hold of him.

* * *

"I am so screwed up the ass."

"Ah, apparently from what they're saying, you already have-"

"Ok, I get that enough from my boyfriend. Don't need that from you too."

Kiyomi smiled sympathetically as she stood up and brushed her immaculate suit off. "Well, at least now you're prepared, right? And maybe your boyfriend won't mind being in the public eye!"

Raito sweat dropped.

'Yeah, the famous anonymous artist who goes by who knows how many pseudonyms really won't mind being attacked by random strangers and, from what I'm guessing, getting his picture taken continuously by paparazzi if this really gets crazy. He'll be so excited.'

"Yeah… maybe."

"Oh, I'm sorry to have to have been the one to break the news to you, Yagami-kun. I have to get going now, but was really nice seeing you!" Kiyomi waved as she began to walk off in the opposite direction she had come from. "Good luck with everything…?"

The artist smiled as genuinely as he could, half-heartedly returning the wave. The brunette's eyes once again gained a far away look to them as he thought back on his crazy day.

'Thanks. If things keep going like this, I have feeling I'm going to need it.'

* * *

_**Two Weeks Later…**_

Raito sniffled as he scooped out another helping of Ben & Jerry's ice cream (L loves this brand of damn ice cream! Stupid ass…) and brought it to his lips, not even daring to look at how many calories he was downing with each spoonful.

Though, the five empty tubs scattered around the couch, along with the empty soda bottles and Twinkie wrappers might've been a testament to that as well.

"You jack ass!" Raito screamed at the TV, his fist flying into the air in a flurry of fury, disrupting the mountain of blankets scattered around his cocooned body. "You left your baby's mama alone for two years and then expect for her to welcome you back home with open arms?! SHE HAD YOUR BABY! YOUR BBBBAAAABBBBYYYY!"

A woman's sobbing was heard over the artist's wails as he shoved another spoonful of delicious ice cream into his mouth, tears gathering at the corner of his eyes.

"POR QUE, JÈSUS? POR QUE?!"

"Men are ass-holes…" Raito muttered, not acknowledging the penis between his own legs as he nodded continuously. "Big ass-holes..."

Before Raito get back to his ranting-o-uke-ness, a banging began reverberating throughout his apartment. Without even blinking, the young man covered himself with his blankets and quickly turned off TV, ignoring the steady… knocking at his door.

"RAITO?!"

BAM!

BAM!

BAM!

"RAITO, OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR RIGHT NOW, MISTER!"

"Go away!"

"Fuck you, fan boy! Open the damn door and stop being such a pussy!"

"Well fuck you too! That's why God hates you, God hates your dog and God hates your stupid hair cut that is so last season!"

"You didn't!"

"I did!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Thinking he had won the battle, Raito re-emerged from his shelter of blankets, sticking another glob of delicious ice cream into his pouty mouth.

_**SLAM!**_

"HA-HA!"

CRASH!

Ice Cream Spill of Doom!

"Damn it, Sayu!"

"Kiss the key-rings, bitch!" Sayu shook her key chain in front of Raito's face as he stared at her rather awkwardly, the silence stretching for a couple of strained seconds.

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Yeah, that was pretty stupid, wasn't it?"

"I didn't think it needed to be said."

"Well, fuck a cow side ways and call me Chevy Chase."

"_What?_"

"Just shut up and listen, oh Prince of Douche Bagginess."

Sayu strolled into the apartment, flicking her hair back as if she owned the place. Raito pitifully buried himself within his blankets once more, sluggishly blinking back the glower that seemed to be permanently attached to his face.

"Raito, get out of there and listen to what I have to say."

"No."

"Onii-chan, I'm asking nicely."

"No. This is my fortress of solitude. Now go back to your swamp, She-thing."

"You're being so immature, Raito."

"Don't care."

"I'm sure he has a good reason for not calling you, Raito."

"For two weeks?!"

"Ok, that is a bit… extreme. But I seriously think that something's going down."

"That he doesn't want me to know about."

"I-"

"He doesn't trust me."

"I'm sure-"

"He secretly hates my personality."

"Raito-"

"I bet he was just in it for the ass. I damn my ass in all its sexiness! Why can't I ever seem to just get one of the good ones?! Who aren't crazy and perverted… and sexy."

"Onii-"

"Really sexy. And did I mention really good in be-"

"RAITO!"

"Can't you just let me stew in peace, Sayu?"

"No. Now, I know he told you not to 'try to contact him,' but have you tried calling his house at this point?"

"Yes. No one answers."

"His cell phone?"

"Called and text. Nothing."

"Went to his house?"

"The staff says he refuses to see me until a different appointed time."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"… … … … what an ass-hole."

"Exactly."

Sayu plopped down next to the immobile mound of Raito-ness and poked him in, what she was guessing was, his stomach.

No response.

She poked him again.

Still no response.

"Raito, I have an idea. Now don't make me poke you again."

The artist stayed silent for one more moment before slowly poking his head out and eyeing the young woman beside him.

"I'm listening."

"I think," Sayu began, twirling a piece of hair between her fingers. "You need to forget about Ryuuzaki for one night and just have fun."

"Oh God, please don't tell me-"

"YES! GIRLS (and Raito) NIGHT OUT!"

The russet haired young man sweat dropped as he slowly backed away from his sister as far as he could in fright and shook his head.

"Sayu…"

"Raito, you have done all you can to try get this man to realize that you only want to help him, less of being some crazed stalker! (Like Mikami, but less creepy!)" Sayu jumped off the couch and struck a dramatic pose, pointing at Raito in righteousness. "It's not fair that you get stuck sitting here, moping, while he's doing God knows what! You need a life!"

"Sayu-"

"You need excitement!"

"Sayu-"

"You need a pair of hands on that body at all times, getting your automatic freak on!"

"Wah?"

"You need someone to rock the boat and go with the commotion of the locomotion!"

"You're starting to freak me out, Sayu."

"Well… you get the point and that's all that matters."

The youngest Yagami pulled out her cell phone and dialed a number, smirking in delight as Raito flinched in fear.

"Misa, get your shit together!" Sayu yelled into the phone, ignoring the squeal heard on the other line. "We're taking Raito out for a good time!"

'Oh God, don't do this to me…'

"C'mon, Raito! We're gonna sex you up by the end of the night!"

"But-"

"If Ryuuzaki wants to ignore you then dole out the same treatment, and ten-fold! Come, mush my older brother! Mush!"

Sayu hefted to young man up (Jesus, was she Hercules?! Raito thought to himself) and pulled him onto his room and locked the door.

In the midst of all the chaos, neither noticed Raito's cell phone, which lay on the coffee table across from the couch, light up and begin vibrating; the name 'Ryuuzaki' shining on the small screen.

"_**It's too late to apologize… it's too late… I said, it's too late to apologize… it's too late…"**_

Oh, if only L had called earlier…

"_**It's too late…" **_

"Gah! Get that eyeliner away from eyes, damn it!"

He could have spared Raito a whole lot of pain that night.

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Apologize" by OneRepublic, which is actually a song I do like. And now, I hopefully have the song stuck in all of your heads. Mwahahahahaha!

I promised angst, and yet I did not deliver. Woe. But I'm sure you guys will enjoy this just a bit more. The angst is officially on hold. Lol! Next chapter shall bring a whole new meaning to the word clubbing. XD Thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing, and thanks to you guys for reading! See ya soon!


	22. In the Midst of Strangers

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Two: _In the Midst of Strangers_

* * *

"Sayu, for the last fucking time, I refuse to wear any sort of spandex whatsoever!"

"But… but… it's hot!"

"Hot my ass!"

"Yes! Exactly! How else do you expect to shake that a-"

"SAYU! Leave my ass out of any future conversation we may ever have!"

"But… it's so pretty."

"…"

The young artist stayed silent as he looked down at his outfit, a form fitting scarlet dress shirt clung tightly to his torso, accentuating his hotness even further. A pair of comfortable, yet also very form fitting trousers completed the look as the slightly casual, yet still very smexy 23-year-old turned and looked over at his ass, just to see how nice it looked.

'And as always, perfect. Can't really fault the girl for knowing what a nice ass should look like.'

Before anymore slightly disturbing comments could escape the young woman's mouth, Raito stoically ignored the puppy dog look hanging off his sister's face as he strolled out of his room and plopped down on his couch, a perturbed look overcoming his sexy face.

"Totally ruining my clubbing vibes…" The brunette sputtered out as Sayu closed his door and commenced in changing her own clothes for much more revealing ones.

'Like any man is gonna touch _my _little sister's ass!' Raito thought to himself as he cursed his generosity when it came to spoiling his little sister rotten with any outfit they both came in contact with.

"Son-of-a-"

"_**I come home in the morning light, my mother says "When you gonna live your life right?" Oh, mother dear, we're not the fortunate ones-"**_

"ACK!"

Crash!

"_**And girls, they wanna have fu-un."**_

A tanned hand groped for the small phone that lay innocently on Raito's coffee table, his body painfully twisted on the hardwood flooring.

"_**Oh, girls, just wanna have fun!"**_

'I need to get some damn carpeting in this fucking apartment.'

"Hello?"

"RAITO-SAMA!"

THUNK!

'Rule Number One: Check the screen BEFORE you pick the phone, you dumbass.'

"Mikami-kun, how… lovely."

"Raito-sama sounds happy to hear from me! YAY!"

Raito sweat dropped.

"Yeah… what can I do for you, Mikami-kun?"

"I think the question is what can _I_ do for _you_, Raito-sama?"

'Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew and EW! I feel so dirty…'

"Ah, I'm fine, thanks…"

"Are you sure? Cause I'll do whatever you want! Dishes, laundry, vacuuming, cleaning your bathroom, letting you fuck me under your sheets…"

"WHAT?!"

"Vacuuming?"

"I think I'll talk to you later, Mikami-kun…"

Insert Raito's 'I am so fucking scared of you' face, number 253.

"Wait! Is Raito-kun doing anything tonight?!"

"Uh… well, I-"

"RAITO, I'M ALMOST DONE! BE PREPARED FOR THE NIGHT OUT OF YOUR LIFE YOU SEXY MAN-BITCH, YOU!"

Raito winced at the sister-induced shout and prayed to whatever god that may exist that Mikami did not hear the scream of all screams-

"RAITO-SAMA IS GOING OUT TONIGHT?! WHERE IS HE GOING?! I WANT TO COME! WE COULD DANCE!"

"I don't think-"

"WE COULD DRINK!"

"I'm not that much of a drink-"

"WE COULD MAKE OUT!"

"Yeah, totally hanging up right no-"

"I could totally sex you up and spank that tight ass…"

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

"I said so I could totally ask you to dance, of course. What else would I have said?"

"Yeah… of course you did. Gotta go now Mikami-kun, bye!"

"But, Raito-sam-"

Click.

Raito shivered, about to shut his phone when a small message caught his eye.

_Four Missed Calls_

The brunette tapped on a button, opening up the message, blinking in succession.

_Ryuuzaki (4)_

'He finally called…' Raito's face slackened, a small frown overcoming his youthful visage as his hand stood poised over the call button.

'_And he also ignored you for two weeks…'_

For once, the stupid voice had a point.

'_Of course I do. Now go out there and fuck somebody out of spite! What's better than angry grudge sex?!_'

'I really am an undercover-pervert, aren't I?' Raito thought to himself as he closed his cell phone and pocketed it without a second thought. The brunette doubted he was going to do the deed with anyone, but it served L right to think that Raito would just bend over and take it after so much time apart.

No pun intended.

L had been occupying his mind for the past of weeks with his constant silence and random disappearing act, and quite frankly, you could only push Raito so far-

"Sayu, hurry the hell up!"

Before he snapped.

"I'm coming, Prince-Fucking-Charming! Jeez, not everyone is so damn sexy by default, thanks!"

Before Raito could give out a retort, the ground shook as a vibration akin to a herd stampeding down his apartment hallway came rushing down to his door before squeals of (annoying) delightfulness erupted from the other side of his precious wooden door.

BAM, BAM, BAM!

"RAAAAIIIIIITTTTTTOOOOO!!"

"When I get rid of one idiot," Raito mumbled in disdain as he ran a hand through his smooth locks and opened the door, "Another comes to take its place."

"YAY! MISA MISSED HER SEXY GAY BEST FRIEND!"

GLOMP!

Ah yes, Raito missed his daily dose of gothic craziness.

"Misa…" The artist wheezed out from his spot on the floor, underneath the blonde model, "Can you get off me please? Can't… breathe…"

"Whoopsies!" The small blonde jumped off the cherubic 23-year-old as he coughed, struggling to regain the footing he had lost on Misa's behalf. A lacy black dress with an extremely tight corset strung along her chest pushed her ample bosom to the sky as dark make up decorated her beautiful face, a slightly apologetic look lying there.

"Sorry about that, Raito! I guess I don't know my own strength sometimes! Tee-hee!"

Raito glared at the ignorant Goth before coughing once more.

'Idiot squared…'

"I'M READY, BIATCHES!"

"GAH!"

"Yay!"

Sayu stood in her half naked (In Raito's opinion) glory, a small red cocktail dress clinging to her feminine curves as she grinned widely. Well, what are we waiting for! Let's go have a good time!"

"Yes! Let's go get Raito some new man-booty!" Shouted Misa.

"My point exactly!" Sayu excitedly stated as she grabbed her older brother by the arm and his not-so-bright best friend by the other. "We are definitely going to get our freak on."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Raito huffed. "You are not allowed to go near anyone who even looks like they want 'get their freak on' with you. Period."

"Whatev' bro."

"Rai-chan is no fun."

"Hey!"

"Woot! To a crazy ass night and Raito getting some sexy time!"

"Oh my God, what am I getting myself into?"

* * *

"Oh, fuck!"

Raito coughed within the smoke filled room as a flurry of bodies gyrated around him, his sister and dim-witted best friend hanging off his arms with insanely wide smiles on their faces.

The handsome chocolate eyed man immediately noticed a mass of heads turn their way, both of male and female gender, looking him up and down as if he was a piece of meat.

Honestly, it was to be expected at this point.

"I'm gonna get some drinks!" Sayu shouted as she detangled herself from Raito's arm and made her way to the over-crowded bar.

"I'll come with!" Misa exclaimed. "Raito, go mingle!"

'Mingle my ass…'

The disillusioned youth slowly walked over to a table, quite aware of the many stares and gapes sent in his direction. He tossed his head back, looking as if he had just appeared out of a shampoo ad, and carefully scanned the crowd for anyone that caught his attention.

"Hey there, sexy."

Raito lazily looked up as a woman in what he presumed to be in her late twenties, slyly smiled down at him clad in a slinky dark blue dress that barely covered the woman's privates.

"Not interested." Raito automatically responded, wishing to get over with the rejection process quickly.

"Well that's rud-"

"Never said I was nice." The brunette smirked as the woman walked off in a huff, giving him a second glance of longing before moving onto her next victim.

Raito once again moved his attention out towards the dance floor, perusing through the catalog of people grinding on the dance floor as relaxed in his chair.

"Aren't you a cutie?"

The artist held in a sigh as a dark haired man (at least it was a man this time!) with blonde highlights sat down in the other chair, a small smile perched on his youthful face as he gazed at Raito's face with admiration set on his features.

"Are you even old enough to be in this club?" Raito drawled out.

"Uh…" The young man flushed, his blue eyes (obviously contacts) darted onto the table as Raito smirked amusedly.

"Don't worry," Raito laughed as the boy looked up startled. "I won't tell."

"Thanks… my name's Shiro." Flushed cheeks from the heat of the crowded arena cutely lit up the youth's face as he excitedly stared up at Raito's own visage. "What's yours?"

"My name is only given to those 21 years of age and older, kid." Shiro pouted as Raito once again laughed. "Maybe when you're a bit older, kiddo."

Shiro sighed as he stood up, grinning nonetheless.

"You're so hot; I'd be willing to wait it out." He turned to make his way out to the dance floor once again. "But I doubt a guy like you is ever free for the taking very long, huh?"

Raito shakily smiled, a mental picture of L still hanging out in the back of his mind.

'Technically, I'm not even free _now._'

"YO!"

Raito jumped up when a pair of arms suddenly latched onto his middle, hefting him out of his comfort zone and pushing him onto the dance floor.

"What the-"

Hands turned him around as Raito was met with a _very _cute face. Dark brown eyes stared back at him, sharp features creating a handsome visage as light, almost blonde, hair fell unevenly over the man's face.

"Let's dance."

"I don't think you gave me much of a choice." Raito dryly stated as attempted to get out of the man's embrace, only to get pulled back in.

"C'mon, at least let me show you a good time!"

"_**Shawty had them apple bottom jeans (jeans)**_

_**Boots with the fur (with the fur)**_

_**The whole club was looking at her"**_

"Nope, not having it." Raito stated as the song reverberated in his head, refusing to get the hell out. "I am dancing-disabled, thanks. Especially to crap-tastic songs that are so overplayed, they make people want to kill themselves."

"Let me show you some moves then, honey! This is how you break it down!"

"I don't think-"

"Like this!"

"Are you… sure you're doing that right?"

"Fuck yeah! You wanna try?"

"_**She hit the floor (she hit the floor)**_

_**Next thing you know"**_

"Really not necessary… oh… damn." Raito stared at the man as began dry humping the floor. "I think I need some alcohol now."

Raito left the man to his floor-fucking and got himself the strongest drink he could get to erase the disturbing imagery from his poor abused head.

"_**Shawty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low"**_

The young artist downed the drink in a second, barely lifting his hand as the bartender got the hint and slid him another. "You alright, Hun? You look like you just had the worst day of your life."

Raito stared up at the older woman, bright red hair clashing horribly with her lime green and banana yellow low cut halter top. The shimmery material caught him off guard as the woman gave him another drink, his breathing slowing slightly as L once again managed to infiltrate his thought processes.

"No." Rosy lips pouted as Raito let go of the blank charade and leaned his elbows on the counter and stared up at the woman as she absently cleaned out on of her pitchers with a small towel. "I hate men."

"Ah… a lover's spat?"

"Can't be a lover's spat if the other lover is M.I.A. and nowhere to be fucking found." Raito refused the next drink, relieved to just have someone listening to him as he finally ranted. "Completely dissed me and walked out on me without another word _two weeks ago_! I don't even know why he left! I haven't heard from him since…"

"Hm…" The red head put down the pitcher and cocked her head to the side, serving another person that appeared next to the young man before giving Raito her full attention once again. "Maybe something bad happened. Tragedy in the family, something crazy at work, personal health problem…"

"So bad he couldn't tell me about it?"

"How long have you two been dating, if you don't mind me asking?"

"We met almost three months ago… but we've been dating for about as long as that, anyways." Raito blushed, thinking back on their first meeting in the museum.

"Love at first sight?"

Raito snorted.

"I guess not."

"You guessed right."

"Look," The red haired woman with an atrocious fashion sense placed a hand on Raito's shoulder as she gazed at him sympathetically. "I don't know anything about this guy, but I can honestly say that he'd have to be an idiot to drop a guy as gorgeous and as irresistibly sweet as you. All I can say is when you see him, give him a good piece of your mind, but listen to what he may have to say. You never know what's up til you get the whole story."

"You think so?" Raito asked rather woefully.

"Kid, I'm a bartender. If I've heard one story, I've heard them all. So trust me on this one, ok? I listen to people bitch and moan for a leaving whilst watching them get dead-drunk off their asses. I think I would know a thing or two at this point."

Raito nodded as grabbed another drink, downing this one with a small smile.

Thank God for motherly bartenders in horrendous lime-green and banana-yellow tops.

* * *

"After visiting 13 clubs, I'm positive this one's it!" Mikami cried out, spotting Raito's car amongst all the others parked outside of the establishment. Of course, the young man knew the make, model, year AND license plate number by heart.

Mikami fixed his wig and dress, cleverly smirking as the well-built, shiny-headed bouncer eyed him strangely before allowing him (her) passage into the building, a creepy vibe exuding from the attractive woman's presence.

"Thanks so much!" Mikami perkily exclaimed.

The bald headed bouncer shivered as the woman walked past, emphasizing the sway of her backside as she strolled right in.

'What a creepy ass lady…'

* * *

"Thank you for the advice." Raito stated as he stumbled down from the chair and smiled.

The bartender smiled back, knowing the boy looked quite well and smashed. "No problem, sweethear-"

"_**It's too late to apologize… it's too late… I said, it's too late to apologize… it's too late…" **_

Raito jumped at the sound, hand grabbing the cell phone, knowing exactly who it was calling his phone. Chocolate brown eyes met jade green as the woman motherly nodded with a small beaming grin and went back to work, leaving Raito with the decision in his own, quite drunken hands.

The young man gulped, strolling out of the club with his head down to the floor…

And finally picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Raito-kun?!"

"Ryuu-"

"Where have you been? I have been attempting to contact you for the past two hours!"

"**You **have been attempting to contact **me**? Do you realize how worried I have been these past couple of weeks?!"

"I told-"

"I don't give a flying fuck what you said! You did not seriously expect me to just sit still with my arms crossed while my boyfriend falls off the face of the Earth, did you?"

"…"

"Well?"

"I missed Raito-kun. And I am quite willing to tell him what I was up to for the past fourteen days if he feels inclined to listen."

"And if I don't?"

"Then I would simply call him every minute of everyday until he felt like it."

"You are a number one class ass-hole, you know that?"

"Yes. Now where are you? I wish to see Raito-kun in the utmost of haste."

Raito mumbled out the club's name, L quickly saying his goodbye without another word. The brunette laid his head against the concrete building, wondering if he had just done the right thing.

'You better have one hell of a super excuse, L…'

"Because I don't think I can do be in this relationship if this becomes a regular thing." The young man whispered, a headache beginning to form in the back of his head.

The night air chilled the artist's bones as a sense of being watched crept up on Raito, causing him to quickly enter the club once again.

* * *

"He's so hot…" Mikami whispered as he watched Raito enter the building once again through one of the side windows and followed his shadows, the pink skirt of the dress swaying enticingly against his legs.

Mikami ignored the catcalls sent his way as he kept his intense stare on the insanely smexy artist walking over to his not as smexy sister and strangely peppy gothic best friend.

"_Now she's smoking!" _

"_Move it, girlfriend!"_

"_Shake what ya mama gave ya, girl!"_

"_Woot, I don't think I'm ready for that jelly." _

"_I sure as hell am! Pull it this way, girlie!" _

"_I'd hit that."_

"_You'd hit anything with a hole and some lube."_

"_Yeah… but I'd most definitely hit that." _

"So cute…" The cross-dressing lawyer whispered as he sat down and stared at the man. "But something doesn't seem right…"

Raito frowned, his head lowered as both women attempted to comfort him, but to no avail.

"I bet that stupid ass Ryuuzaki has something to do with this!" Mikami seethed, unable to see his Raito-sama so depressed, especially a man-whore like Ryuuzaki. "I'll fix thi-"

"YO!"

"KYA!"

"Let's dance."

* * *

"He's says he's coming right now, so…" Raito pushed his hands into his pockets as he shrugged. "I'm just gonna wait for him outside."

"Do you want me to kick his ass?" Misa asked quite seriously.

"Shit, you? I'd get first dibs on Ryuuzaki's skinny ass." Sayu butted in, a fearful scowl settled over her usually jubilant face. "That man does not know what he's gotten himself into if he breaks my onii-chan's heart."

"Ditto."

Raito sighed as he smiled lovingly at the only two women he could stand for more than thirty seconds (though still less than five minutes). "I'll see you girls later, alright? Make sure to be careful driving home if I'm not back, ok?"

"Yes sir!" Came the chorus of female voices, two pairs of eyes following the young man as he made it out the door and through the club security guards, every pair of eyes in the room following him as he left.

"You think Ryuuzaki stands a chance against Rai-chan's temper?" Misa asked the younger girl, carefully sipping her Sex on the Beach.

Sayu smirked, shaking her head.

"Not a rat's chance in hell, my friend."

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own "Girl's Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper (which was thankfully pushed on me by my beta, Kitsune55 XD) nor do I own "Low" by Flo Rida (featuring T-Pain, of course!)... Thank God. Yay for overplayed songs that weren't that good to begin with? Lol!

See, I had cross-dressing, creepy guys dancing, underage flirting, and an awesome bar tender, topped with lots of Raito-gawking AND an uncomfortable phone conversation with slight stalk-age! Lol! More L next chapter, and trust me, there will be blood! XD Thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing as quick as she always does, (even if she thinks otherwise! Lol!) and thanks to you guys for reading and reviewing. Honestly, I'm surprised you all aren't sick of this story by now. Lol!


	23. Reaching Out Once More

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Three: _Reaching Out Once More_

* * *

Raito should have been at home, watching some crazy ass DVD from his porn collection whilst eating vanilla pudding with warm, chewy peanut butter cookies in his nice comfy bed wondering if canadian bacon was actually as good as regular bacon for the sake of boredom.

But no…

_**"We are young..." **_

Instead, he was standing outside a weird club as strains of music inflitrated his delicate ears from inside the smokey establishment, strange people overtly staring at his scrumptious ass, all the while waiting for some asshole that had abandoned him for two weeks without so much of a word as to why.

_**"Heartache to heartache, we stand..."**_

Raito most definitely needed some more alcohol, and he needed it now.

"_Hey sexy, how about I tap that ass!"_

"_I get first dibs!"_

"_What are you talking about, he's not gay!"_

"_Dude, don't you know who that is?!"_

Raito winced, suddenly scared of the crowd surrounding him as he shivered from the breezy night air.

"_Uh…"_

"_He's that Yagami artist guy!"_

"_The totally queer one?!"_

"_Ye-ah!"_

"_WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE SO DAMN HOT?!"_

"_I have a chance!"_

"_Me too!"_

"_Think he'd still do me?"_

"Gah!"

Raito began to back up towards the bouncer, only to squeal at the feel of something pinching his right ass cheek. The young artist quickly turned around, only to pale in horror as the bouncer winked down at him.

The russet-haired artist sweat dropped.

'I really can't prevail, can I?'

'_No, and I doubt you will ever will Mr. Pussy-pants. Now get your shit together and tough it up! That ass-hole will be here any minute!_'

'What do I say?!' Raito panicked, for a moment at a loss for words.

'_What do you say? WHAT DO YOU SAY?!_'

'Maybe that was a stup-'

'_You tell him he is a stupid mother fucking son-of-a-bitch that probably has both herpes and gonorrhea, and that he's a nasty whore with horrible halitosis!_'

Raito blinked to himself.

'Wah…?'

'_You let that over-sized panda know that you can do much better and that his penis is ten sizes too small! And every time you guys did it, you were thinking about somebody else! Somebody much more sexy! And with a bigger penis! _'

'Uh…'

'_Then, when he looks at you with those big watery doe eyes, all depressed and ready to cry-_'

'Yeah…'

'_You kick him in the balls and shove your arm up his ass! See how he likes it!_'

'…'

'_Mwahahahahahahahaha!_'

Raito literally had nothing to think for that.

"I think I'm mentally unstable…" Raito muttered out loud, running a hand through his impeccably stylish hair.

"Sweetie, we're ALL a hot mess!" A woman passing by him with what looked like incredibly fake extensions and **very** slurred speech commented, sunglasses askew on her face. "Y'all just gotta make do with what you got!"

"Why are you wearing sunglasses?" Raito suddenly asked, taken off guard by the simple fact.

It was 11:35 at night for God sakes!

"Creates ill-u-sion…" The woman winked (Maybe? Raito couldn't tell with the gigantic sunglasses tilted all over her discombobulated face) as she wobbled off, screaming about Moon-pies and corndogs.

"Loony…" Raito sang out as he shook his head, still staring at the crazy woman making a scene, not noticing the black Rolls Royce pulling up from behind him.

"WHERE ARE ALL MY BITCHES AND HOES Y'ALL?!" Crazy sunglass-lady suddenly shouted, before falling to the ground in a dead faint.

Everyone stared at her prone body.

"_Should we… take her inside?"_

"_Is she even alive?" _

"_Kick her and see if she twitches!"_

"_Dude… seriously?"_

Raito continued to stare.

"Now that's some sick shit right there."

"I think I would have to agree, Raito-kun."

_**"Love is a battlefield." **_

"ACK!"

CRASH!

"WOULD YOU STOP SNEAKING UP ON ME?!"

"I apologize." Chocolate brown eyes stared up at the mess of dark hair, pale skin and baggy jeans in something akin to relief, before the anger at being stood up for TWO WEEKS boiled over, causing the younger artist to jump up, snarling before cocking his arm back and-

GLOMP!

"AH!"

DOUBLE CRASH!

Obsidian eyes gazed down at the body below them, a small smirk set on L's face as he diligently chewed on one of his thumbs.

"What do you think you're doing?" Raito flushed, aware of the eyes staring over at the new scene on display for their viewing pleasure.

"_I guess you were right."_

"_Yeah, look at the way he's straddling him. Totally gay."_

"_Fuck…"_

"_Are you recording this?"_

"_Two hot guys looking as if they're about to fuck on the middle of the sidewalk, one of them looking angry as hell while the other just looks turned on? Shit yeah! YouTube, here I come!"_

"Ryuuzaki, get the _**fuck **_off me." The older man shifted a bit, looking as if it would take a sledgehammer and a full on wrecking crew to get him off his own boyfriend. "Ryuuzaki…"

"I do not wish to get off Raito-kun until he is willing to listen to me without inflicting any unnecessary violence."

"Even though you deserve it?"

"That is besides the fact."

"So you admit it?"

"Admit what, Raito-kun?"

"That you deserve to get fucked up from the floor up?"

"Does Raito-kun mean that literally, or-"

"Do you actually think I'd put out for you after what you did?!"

"…"

L gnawed on his thumb a bit harder than before.

"Oh, I am going to-"

"Ryuuzaki! Get off the poor kid!" A large familiar afro appeared behind the anonymous artist, successfully pulling him off Raito and away from his precious personal space.

"Get in the car… bunch of fruity psychos…" Aizawa's afro jiggled as he walked back into the car's front seat, muttering miscellaneous things about 'horny perverts' and 'no self-control'.

Raito couldn't help but agree.

"I brought my car with me tonight. I'm not just going to leave it here." The brunette brushed himself off as he stood up, leaving a good amount of space between himself and his… well, he didn't even know if he considered the other man his boyfriend at the moment.

'What an idiot…'

'_Go for the balls!_'

Raito sweat dropped internally.

"Will Raito-kun follow me to my home, then?" L quietly asked, uncharacteristically glancing down to the ground in a shy manner. Raito thought about just saying no and ending everything right then and there, but…

"Please?"

Just one look into those large puppy dog eyes and Raito knew he was gone.

"Fine. Lead the way... but no leading me to a secluded area! That is not allowed!"

"Of course not, Raito-kun."

L watched the younger man stride to his car, the blank look on his face even softer than usual.

"That would be unfair to us both."

* * *

"RAITO-SAMA!"

Mikami stomped outside, everyone staring at the crazed she-male as he began gasping for air, hands on his knees.

"Did anybody see an incredibly sexy brunette with an unforgettable ass?!"

Everyone blinked.

"Brown eyes… short hair… totally bringing sexy back wherever he goes?" A short girl with a bob timidly asked, dressed entirely in black.

"Yes!" Mikami cried out, his voice returning to its normal pitch.

The response was almost instantaneous.

"_Didn't he leave with some creepy looking homeless person?" _

"_He wasn't homeless, he came in a Rolls freaking Royce!"_

"_Dude, he dressed like a bum though." _

"_I thought he was cute!"_

"_Yeah, in a homicidal maniac sort of way."_

"_I don't know, I thought he was more of a child molester kind of creepy."_

"_You're both wrong. He was totally a perverted rapist scary."_

"_I… have to agree with that one."_

"_Yeah, if the way he was grinning while he was practically dry humping the other guy is any indication…"_

"_I don't care what anybody says; I'd hit __**both**__ of them at the __**same**__ time."_

"_Seriously, you need to get your libido in check."_

"_And probably get tested while you're at it…"_

One of the women within all the raucous blinked as Mikami's left eye twitched in anger, his teeth gritting together rather viciously. One well placed step and a dress shift later was all it took before-

"… … … Wait. Are you a man or a woman?"

"_She said… what?" _

"_Why would -"_

"_I think that's a dude who looks like a lady." _

"_Holy shit, how did we NOT notice that huge Adam's Apple?!"_

"_What the fuck?!"_

"_I didn't know this was THAT kind of bar!"_

_Simultaneous Sweat Drop._

"Uh…"

By that point, Mikami had enough sense to start running and not look back.

"_I'd still totally hit that five ways from Sunday."_

"_WE KNOW!"_

* * *

"I should not be here." Raito hit his steering wheel, waiting for the damn gate to open so both cars could get into the property. "I should be at home… drinking some hot chocolate… watching another senseless Vh1 special about eight-hit wonders... anywhere but here."

Aizawa gave him the ok as the car in front of him finally moved forward, the gates opening with a rusty creak.

Raito's face scrunched up in distaste.

"Here I go…"

Both cars rolled up into the garage filled with numerous vehicles, Raito once again in awe in just how rich his… well, how rich _L_ was.

'Since that's his most favoritest name _ever_.' The 23-year-old thought in displeasure, strolling out of the car rather stylishly, flipping his hair back away from his perfect face. The dim light reflected off his milk chocolate brown eyes, creating a rather ethereal glow around his softening features.

L slouched out of his own vehicle, pardoning both Aizawa and the driver away in a hasty manner. As Aizawa's afro wiggled out of the room, he caught the younger artist's eye, a sympathetic glance sent Raito's way.

'I think I'm going to need all the support I can get.'

"Come, Raito-kun. Let us go inside." At the sound of the stoic voice, Raito found himself cringing as he nodded hesitantly.

The action did not go unnoticed by L.

Raito followed the mess of black hair into the main house, cautiously making his way up the familiar set of round stairs and multiple hallways.

'This house is like a freaking maze!' The twitchy brunette watched as ebony locks swung to and fro, the baggily dressed man shambling around the hallways seemingly without a care in the world.

"Raito-kun looks very uncomfortable."

Raito stayed silent, clenching his fists as his eyes narrowed vehemently.

"He has never looked this uncomfortable in my home before."

Still Raito kept his relative cool, not saying a word.

"Nor has he ever been this silent."

'He just wants me to punch him in the face, the fucking bastard.'

"We are here."

A pale white hand fumbled with the door knob, pushing the entrance open in a rather bored manner. L shuffled inside, his hands pushed into his pockets before turning around to face his now visibly angry lover.

"Rait-"

CRACK!

"Wah-"

THUNK!

Raito glared down at the stunned artist, who was now bleeding from his nose, his anger palpable in the air around them.

"That," Raito spat out, L stumbling back to his feet as the russet haired man finally let loose his inner frustrations on the older man. "Was for worrying me for two weeks and not even **calling** me to tell me how you are."

Crack!

"That was for refusing to see me!"

Slap!

"And that… well, that was for just being a shitty boyfriend in general you ass."

Obsidian eyes closed as L felt the continuing stream of blood slowly crawl down his nose and the terrible ache of a most probably bruised right eye.

"… I apologize." L stated quietly.

The admission of guilt did not appease Raito in the slightest as stomped his foot onto the ground and glared down at the pathetic man before him.

"What the hell is the matter with you?!" The brunette cried out in frustration. "Have you never been in relationship before?! How do you leave without telling your significant other why, disappear for two weeks, ignore your lover when they show concern, and then show up out of the blue and **not **expect to be punched in the face?!"

"I did not mean to worry you, Raito." L got up from the carpeted floor, wiping the crimson liquid still pouring down from his nose with a formerly white sleeve. "And he is correct in assuming that I have never been in an intimate relationship before this one."

Raito couldn't help his next reaction.

"WHAT?!"

Crash!

His ass didn't even hurt at this point.

'Or maybe it's the plush carpeting…' The younger man absently thought as he gawked up at the pale artist in shock.

"This is the first relationship I have ever been apart of, Raito-kun… as _difficult_ as it is to believe."

"But-"

"Sex is one thing; actually participating in sharing an emotional connection with someone is another." L grabbed Raito's hands, hefting the younger man up without so much of a flinch. "I do not expect this to placate Raito-kun's temper in the slightest, but he should at least try to understand that if I have hurt him, it was not intentional."

"I'm not _that_ irrational as to not try to see your point of view…" Raito muttered.

"I think the blood rushing down my face says otherwise, Raito-kun." L smirked as he crouched down on the bed, leaning forward slightly and pinching the bridge of his fortunately not broken nose in an effort to stifle the bleeding.

"Well… you deserved that." And the lack of regretful remorse on Raito's face proved that fact. "What I want to know is what was so important that you felt you had to hide it from me."

"It… is complicated, Raito-kun."

"Then un-complicate it, smartass."

Smooth tender hands replaced L's own over his nose, warm brown eyes gazing down at the semi-confused face.

"Makes no sense to have a boyfriend and not take advantage of the fact, right?"

"I…" Raito's eye twitched at L's uncertainty. "Suppose so, Raito-kun."

"You suppose right, _L-kun_. Now get to talking. I don't have all day."

L wearily smiled up at his lover, the strain of the last 14 days finally catching up with him.

"Before anything else, I need you to know, Raito-kun…"

The caramel eyed man leaned forward to hear the whispered words just a bit better, still keeping a good distance between himself and the artist's body. "What, L?"

"I _have _truly missed my Raito-kun very much."

"Well maybe you shouldn't send me away then!" Raito blurted out.

"Did Raito-kun miss me as well?" L ignored the smart-aleck remark and gave his classic doe eyes in response.

Big… watery… puppy dog… eyes…

'Can't resist!'

Raito sighed.

"Yes I did, you big monkey toed oaf. Are you happy now?"

L smirked, reaching up and pulling the young brunette down on top of him with a small 'oomph!'

"Ridiculously so."

"… … Idiot."

"But I am still Raito-kun's idiot, so all is well."

"Shut the hell up!"

"If only…"

"What did I miss about you again?"

"The sex?"

"Pervert!"

Thunk!

"… … … Ow."

"Definitely an idiot."

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Love is a Battlefield" by Pat Benatar (Once again, a great idea contributed by Kitsune55! Lol!) Yay for Eighties songs!

O.O; Wow. That was strange. Lol! I really wrote this chapter without even thinking about it... is that sad? Thankies to Kitsune55 for beta-ing, and as always, I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Next one should finally have the angst I've been dying to add to the story. Yay! I'm so excited. XD


	24. Living More Than One Lie

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Four: _Living More Than One Lie_

* * *

"_Aizawa, please hurry." L anxiously shifted in his seat as he continually bit down on his bruised thumb. The afroed man chanced a look over his shoulder, not at all surprised by the picture of faux calm L managed to piece together as they drove ever closer to their allotted destination. _

"_I'm sure he's fine, L." _

_Aizawa attempted to comfort the man, knowing that beyond the calm façade laid a human being in torment. L didn't have the patience to deal with emotions, but when a torrent such as this hit him all at once, he dealt with it the only way he knew how. _

_Keeping it all locked in._

"_As long as he is safely within the confines of my home and being properly medicated, we should not have anything to worry about." Unfathomable ebony eyes, completely void of emotion, stayed focused on anything but the man in the front seat. "However, a part of me is still not convinced, as strange as that sounds…" _

_Afro Jiggle of Anxiety. _

"_Please Aizawa, it is a necessity that both you and your undeniably large afro leave me in peace. I have much to contemplate on our way to the house." L switched thumbs, his large eyes blankly staring down at the rugged car floor. _

"_But don't you think it might be prudent to call Yaga-"_

"_No." The droopy eyed man gave Aizawa a sharp look, a bit of his own distress finally showing on his face. "This does not concern him." _

_Aizawa did not look convinced. _

"_Don't you think he'll be worried abou-"_

"_He is a big boy, Aizawa." L stridently interrupted once more. "I am sure he will be able to survive without me constantly attached to his hip for more than two minutes at a time." _

"_Well then…" Aizawa pointedly kept his sight on their destination as L then dismissed him without having to actually say so. Rusty gates greeted their visions as the old set of bars cracked open with a squeal, car moving forward at a snail's pace. _

"_We're here." _

_L jumped out of the car as it screeched to slight halt in front of the large property, quickly making his way into his home without dragging his feet inside, like he normally would have done in any other occurrence. _

"_Ryuuzaki-san," One of the maids, face contorted in a sign of distress as a heavy flush settled over her cheeks, called him over from the top of his stair case. "He keeps asking for you, Ryuuzaki-san! Please, he doesn't look well!" _

"_I am coming." L quickly made his way up the stairs, dismissing the maid with a slight swish of the hand as he made his way to the first door on his right. The 30 year old gulped as he silently opened the entrance to the small room, eyes widening in quiet anticipation. _

* * *

"And then what?" Raito anxiously asked, peering over at his lover's face from the other side of the bed they were both now laying on.

"I am getting to that, Raito-kun."

"Well, how I am supposed to know that when you suddenly space out in the middle of a story and stare at the wall like it's more interesting than I am?"

"Raito-kun's vanity shall be the one constant that shall always remain true in this relationship." L rolled his eyes, rubbing a tired eye with his crimson-stained sleeve.

"I am not vain." The younger artist retorted.

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Ok, maybe a little." Raito acceded.

"Really, Raito-kun? Just a little?" L sent the younger man an incredulous look as Raito's eye twitched in agitation.

"Shut the hell up, L. Now if you wouldn't mind continuing…?"

L sighed as he leaned back against the cushions yet again, remnants of memories from the past two weeks coming back once more.

"Well…"

* * *

"_Sensei…" _

_L rushed forward, his old teacher haggardly lying on the bed in exhaustion as one of his hands kneaded his chest. Obsidian eyes glazed over at the pitiful sight, the stunned former pupil stopping just a few feet away from the man that had taught him everything there was to know about art and life in general. _

"_L…" Light brown eyes wrinkled around the edges narrowed as a small smile appeared on the older man's face, pieces of long dark hair falling half-hazardously over the once handsome face. "Beautiful day, huh?" _

_L did not look amused. _

_A flurry of coughs flew out of the man's throat; his appearance aged by the sudden spring of throaty hacks broke the tense silence of the room. L cautiously slid closer to the aging man, not knowing how to react in the situation he was in. _

'_How does one comfort someone else in a time of desperate need?' _

_The dark haired man himself had never had to deal with a situation such as this. It had never been in his upbringing to actually __**care**__ about someone else. _

"_You look so confused, son." The elder of the two beckoned L over, his hand trembling at the amount of effort even that small action took. "I'm not going to bite…" _

_L shifted uncomfortably as he slowly shuffled forward, his back even more hunched over than usual as the artist attempted to hide within himself. "Of course not, Reiji-sens-"_

"_Just call me Reiji. You surpassed me so long ago… I don't even understand why you still call me teacher." _

"_I…" _

"_Jesus L, did I screw you up that bad as a kid?" Reiji laughed as L gave a small smile, this one actually genuine. _

"_I suppose I do not have adequate training in appearing to seem empathetic." L crouched on top of the bed, staring at Reiji with wide dark eyes as he gently gnawed on his abused thumb. "I apologize." _

"_Don't be an idiot." A large hand ruffled L's shaggy hair as a series of coughs rattled the older man's body once again. "And stop with whole apologetic charade. None of this is your fault… especially when it comes to your upbringing." _

"_I suppose so." However the look on L's face said otherwise. _

_His past was not something he enjoyed looking back upon. _

"_You looked like I just summoned the demons of Hell when I said that."_

"…"

"_La-"_

* * *

"Eh?"

Raito blinked.

"Why did you stop this time?"

Cloudy obsidian eyes blankly stared up at the ceiling, not sure how to approach the next subject with the young man. It wasn't necessary that he know that part of the story, but…

"L?"

Didn't he owe him that much?

"Raito-kun does not know a lot about me." L stated, a small revelation amongst the mess of memories weighing him down. "Raito-kun does not even know my true name."

"I-"

"There is a reason for this." The older artist lifted himself up from the bed, Raito rising up slightly from his laying position in worriment. "I doubt you could understand why, though."

"Why do you say that?" The 23-year-old brunette asked wearily. "Some big revelation I don't have the patience to unravel? Well, if that's the case, then you're right L."

The artist froze in shock, his back still facing the younger man.

"It's either get back here on this bed and explain all this to me, or watch me leave and not come back. I can't take all these stupid riddles anymore."

L stayed silent for a moment, his back tense with the weight of the situation. The option was all too clear…

_Fight or Flight._

And L was so sick of running.

'Would it really be so bad… to just let go of everything holding us back?'

Without so much of a word, the dark haired man slouched back on the bed, leaving a large gap of space between himself and Raito.

This was the next stage, wasn't it? It was time to finally give his all…

"L Lawliet."

And it would be in the form of a single name.

The younger man blinked.

"Wha-"

"L Lawliet. It is… my name. L Lawliet."

With that one name, L had set his cards on the table, giving the beautiful artist all the power. He knew what his name was. He knew where he lived. Hell, he opened himself up far more with this young man than he had ever did with anyone else in the past 30 years of life he had lived.

If Raito wanted to go out right now and tell everyone who the famously secretive artist L was, he could.

But something in L knew he wouldn't.

'You trust him…' L thought in awe. 'You really trust him…'

With that final thought, the anonymous artist stridently gazed at the wide-eyed boy, waiting for something-

_Anything._

"Lawliet…" Raito whispered, a small tinge of a blush smudged across his tanned cheeks. "It's…"

L braced himself.

"Beautiful. Thank you." The gap suddenly seemed less distant as the younger artist scuttled even closer to the older man. "Please tell me more about what happened, Lawliet."

A warmth encased L's entire being, hearing his name finally spoken from someone's lips other than his or his teacher's own for the very first time.

'I trust him…'

"Of course, Raito-kun."

* * *

"_Lawliet, please look at me." _

_L kept his gaze on the floor, refusing to look up at his former teacher's face. A sigh caught the artist's attention in the midst of his brooding. _

"_If there is anyone to blame, it is me." _

"_What?" Murky eyes snapped up, a weary smile evident on Reiji's face. "That is-"_

"_Completely the truth." Reiji finished for L. _

"_Please do not think that." L pleaded with the sick man, his eyes glazing over with a bright sheen. "I do not hold you accountable for any of the problems I faced as a child." _

"_I know. It doesn't make it less true, though." Reiji replied. A small shift and a heavy groan later, the older man was sitting up, a pained look encompassing his expression. "I'm dying, Lawliet. You can't stop that." _

_Mahogany eyes narrowed. _

"_And you can't blame yourself for it, either." _

"_Yes sir." L stoically answered, his gaze giving nothing he felt away. _

"_Hm…" Reiji studied the younger man in front of him with a keen artist's eye, a tiny ray of light brightening his dull sight. "I heard a __**very**__ interesting piece of information from one of your maids passing by…" _

_Reiji sat amused as the boy's body tensed once again, this time for an altogether different reason. _

"_I hear you've picked up a new boy toy, L." _

"_He is not a boy toy." L snapped, a fire seldom seen in the artist's face igniting at the choice of words used by his mentor. "He is… someone far more special than that." _

"_Very special?" Reiji asked tentatively. _

"… _Yes. Very special." _

"_Well, he's got to be if he can deal with your antics for more than five minutes at a time!" A series of short laughs and coughs speckled the room as L shifted uncomfortably, aware of just how well his teacher knew how he could be. _

"_He is something else." L whispered as he stood up, back still hunched over in its accustomed slant. "I do not think I would be able to find another just like him. You would... enjoy meeting him." _

"_Will I get to meet him?" Reiji asked curiously. "Or is he as in the dark as the rest of the world is when it comes to who you really are?" _

"…"

"_I see." Reiji leaned back against the mattress, a subtle hint of disappointment laxly lain in his dying gaze. "How serious are you about this boy?" _

"_Very." L answered impassively. _

"_So much so that you aren't willing to tell him anything about you?" The older man deadpanned._

"_I will tell him everything he needs to know eventually." Ebony eyes narrowed at the insinuation made on his dedication to his relationship with Raito. _

"_Everything he needs to know? Really? And when is eventually, Lawliet? When he's packed his bags and decided you aren't worth his time anymore?" _

"_Raito-kun would not do that." The artist insisted. "We are two sides of the same coin." _

"_Really? Not everybody has patience of steel, L. And quite frankly, you tend to wear on people's tolerance just acting the way you do." Reiji stated frankly, shaking L's foundation with just a couple sentences. "Do you think you have the ability to actually __**be**__ in a relationship at this point? Do you know what's to be expected in that sort of commitment?"_

"_I am learning…" L mumbled into his chest, head lowered at the barrage aimed towards his character. His teacher knew his weakest points, and hit them with perfect precision._

"_And is he satisfied?" _

"_I…" L's void expression twisted, an unexpected uncertainty springing forth from his chest. "I should hope so." _

"_Hope is a fool's word, Lawliet." Reiji leaned forward, grabbing hold of one of L's cool hands in one last attempt to get to the boy. "If you do not know the answer, simply state so, but to hope for such a thing…" _

"_Sensei…" _

"_I wish for nothing but the best for you, Lawliet. Even if I have not been able to give you everything you deserved these last 15 years we've known each other." Reiji smiled as he let go of L's hand, eyes finally closing in exhaustion. _

"_Thank you, sensei." _

_L then left the room, brooding in solitary silence as the older man fell into a deep sleep. _

_He had much contemplating to do over this new set of circumstances he was now faced with. _

'_Raito…' _

* * *

"He said… all that?" Raito whispered, the man lying next to him staring at him with an intense dark gaze. "Why did you…"

"Tell you?" L finished for him, the cinnamon-eyed man no longer meeting his sight and instead fidgeting with a pillow next to him. "He passed away today."

Raito ceased all movement.

"What…?"

"It is strange, isn't it? He passed away in this house; a home I managed to buy because he created what I am today, and I have felt nothing but a passing melancholy." L candidly whispered. "In truth, I do not know what it is that I am accurately supposed to feel, having the only man I could have called a parental type no longer a part of my life."

No tears. No hinge in the voice. No facial expression of distress. Raito had to wonder if the man in front of him was made of steel.

But no…

Whatever emotional connection that had been severed had been a deep one indeed. He could see it in the way L kept his distance, not knowing whether he should come closer or stay away.

"I did not have anyone to give me nourishment as a child, as I was discarded at a very young age, left to fend for myself. Orphanage upon orphanage passed me along, not understanding what was wrong with me, or why I could not act like the other children." L droned on, not truly aware of the look Raito was now imploring upon him. "Everyone seemed to dismiss me, as if I was some space of air instead of an actual person, whether it was for my strange oddities or superfluous honesty… but then he came."

Obsidian orbs twinkled as L thought back on the man who had given him a chance in living life.

"Reiji-sensei taught me everything there was to know about artistry, building me from the moment he saw me. I would not be here if it wasn't for him."

Hands smoothed through L's dark hair, Raito closing the small amount of space between them without another moment to lose. Dark eyes once again glazed over as memories of past years came running through his mind, harsh words and heavy glances echoing within his ears after so much effort in suppressing them.

A small clock-radio beside the bed began to play softly, the numbers blinking quite suddenly as a soft voice echoed throughout the small room.

_**"Spend all your time waiting for that second chance; **__**for a break that would make it okay."**_

"Will Raito-kun stay with me, if only for awhile?" The dazed artist asked, a drained expression overcoming the insomniac's face as his eyes closed. "I do not feel… so lost when Raito-kun is with me…"

_**"There's always one reason to feel not good enough, and it's hard at the end of the day..."**_

Raito said nothing, simply pushing himself closer to the man he cared about as they both drifted off into a semi-uncomfortable sleep, neither anticipating the morning light that would soon give way to another endless day as the last strains of music faded away into the oblivion of their wonderfully deep sleep.

_**"I need some distraction; oh beautiful release... Memory seeps from my veins; let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight."**_

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Angel" by Sarah Mclachlan, which was suggested by my beta, Kitsune55, who loves sap as much as I do... Lol!

So? So? Whacha think? Huh? I reallly want to knnnooooooowww... Pocky for whoever guesses who L's sensei is (which came from Kitsune55 as she came up with the name! Lol!) and double pocky for those who just reviewwwwww! Don't mind my over-hyperness by the way, this is just how I get when I'm tired. Lol! Many thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing, and really, who needs to stop going over my stuff in the middle of the night and just SLEEP! I command it! And many thanks to all of you readers! Next chapter should be done soon!


	25. Giving More Than Enough

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Five: _Giving More than Enough_

* * *

It was a strange feeling, to say the least.

The feel of the younger artist's head against his shoulder as he slept, enigmatic sepia eyes closed behind a shroud of long lashes, and deep sleep was not out of the ordinary; at least, it had not been before the two weeks they had spent apart.

No, the physical sensation was the same. It was the emotional aspect that somewhat bothered the older painter as he shifted on the bed, his abnormally-normal insomnia kicking in at the worst of moments.

What L wouldn't give for just one night of nothing but complete unconsciousness...

Oh, what a happy perverted artist he would be.

The soft music coming from the radio contorted, the sound of electric guitars hollowly ringing throughout the room as L blinked in exhaustion, not daring to get up and change the station to something a bit more mellow.

_**"Catch me as I fall... Say you're here, and it's all over now."**_

A soft exhalation of breath against his collarbone disrupted L from his brooding, his dark murky eyes narrowing down at the source of his distress, rather vehemently.

Yet, even if he could manage to pretend to be mad at the situation at hand, L knew it would be fruitless in the end.

The glare slowly melted off his face as he continued to stare down at the boy's mop of sleek auburn hair, a burst of unknown emotion filtering through his chest as a hand involuntarily made its way into the soft tresses. This boy was an official part of his life now…

L wasn't sure if this was a good thing or not.

Tired eyes, so sick of the life given to them, slowly closed against L's better judgment. The deep breathing of his lover's gentle slumber calmed his mind as memories long buried began running through the artist's mind, not so unlike an old Rocky movie, except much slower and no awesome seventies soundtrack to accompany it.

_**"Don't turn away- (Don't give in to the pain) Don't try to hide- (Though they're screaming your name)"  
**_

The refrain run within his ears as L sighed into the pillow, the weight against his shoulder pulling him away from the land of the conscious and into another world he _did not_ want to enter.

_**"Don't close your eyes- (God knows what lies behind them) Don't turn out the light- (Never sleep, never die...)"  
**_

Without actually meaning to, L made one more grasp at consciousness, trying to hold onto the feeling of comfort that came along with being with Yagami Raito, who understood him better than even the one man who had both molded his talent and saved him from his own aimlessness.

'I must be a masochist…'

That was L's last thought as his world faded into inky darkness, the movie that was his life then flashing in front of his eyes in a haze of chaotic organization and cloudy remembrance.

* * *

_You would think he couldn't have remembered much from that night. _

_And it was true; he didn't._

_Not any of the menial details, anyway. _

_L could not remember what day of the week it had been, nor could he remember exactly what time of night the robbery had taken place. Nor did he remember why he had gotten out of bed, or how he had managed to get his parents out of their own beds at the same time. _

_He did remember how long it had taken before the first shots had exploded within his family's home. _

_There had been exactly five gunshots fired that night; consequently, two of them had been aimed at him. _

_His mother had been valiant in trying to save him, even if for the briefest of moments. _

_It was her face that would forever haunt the young five-year-old that would someday become a man… _

_That horrified expression mixed with so much pain. _

_L had never been so scared in his life. _

_The screams had locked themselves into his throat as he crawled inside his dear mother's cold embrace, her blood smearing across his arms and shirt as the woman's still bleeding torso spilled onto her son's still live body. _

_Maybe it had been the shock that had instilled in him the burst of calm that sprang from his chest as his father's life-less body fell next to him, tears not yet trekking down his cheeks as the young boy tried to block it __**out**__. _

"_Mommy…" The small child whispered as he sniffled, the smell of burnt wood filling his nostrils and taking over…_

* * *

_Charred walls encased the small boy as he limped out of the room, his survivor's instincts kicking in the moment he realized he could __**die**__. _

_Lawliet stopped thinking, staring at the blackened walls, not knowing what to do. _

_He was trapped in a house with his dead parents and a burning fire surrounding him from all sides, and he __**did not know what to do**__. _

_Lawliet had to think…_

_He had to hold on. _

* * *

"_It's the kid!"_

"_Oh shit! Didn't you cap him?!"_

"_Fuck…" _

_Lawliet stared at the men slowly coming towards him, his small face full of fear and panic. _

_The smell dusky smoke hung off his body as smudges of dark charcoal black ash streaked across his face and body rather irritatingly. These men were not in the mood to play around, however. _

_They knew a fresh kill when they saw one. _

_And Lawliet knew danger when he saw it coming. _

"_Please…" _

"_Oh, you poor thing…" One of the men mocked, a small smirk perched on their thin lips. "You're gonna wish you stayed in there with your mommy and daddy…" _

_Luckily, Lawliet couldn't remember the rest of that night. _

_At least, he liked to pretend he couldn't. _

* * *

_L Lawliet almost immediately noticed three things as he groggily woke up, his head pounding relentlessly against his temples as a low moan of agony escaped his bloody, chapped lips…_

_One, it was freezing, yet his body felt like it was on fire. _

_Two, he was not wearing any pants. _

_And three… well, three, he was lying against the cold gravelly pavement in a place that was most definitely not his house when he should have been at home and in bed. _

_This was all too much for a five-year-old to take in at once. _

_Luckily, Lawliet was no ordinary five-year-old. _

_Large ebony eyes hidden beneath shaggy dark bangs glanced up at the murky gray sky, buildings hovering around the small boy as he fought for clear consciousness. Gritted teeth and shivers of pain escalated as the poor child attempted to sit up, only to wheeze out a gasp out of unexpected agony against his left side of his body. _

_Before Lawliet passed out from the burst of sudden hurt, a tear rolled down his cheek, joining the many dried tracks already smudged across his face. _

* * *

"_Who's that?"_

"_How am I supposed to know?" _

"_I don't know…" _

"_Think he's dead?"_

"_Looks it. Maybe we should call the cops…" _

"_And have 'em think we did it? No thanks." _

"_But-"_

"_I'm leaving. If you want to call the cops, go right ahead. Just leave me out of it." _

"… … _Hey, wait up! Don't leave me behind, you ass!" _

"_Thought so. Stupid brat." _

_Lawliet slowly opened his eyes as he saw two new blurry forms run away from him, the street they entered from the desolate alleyway looking oh so inviting to his prone gaze. _

_Maybe…_

_The five-year-old sighed as a dull ache shuddered through the left side of his torso. _

_Maybe the pain had gone down some?_

_Lawliet carefully sat up, putting only a bit of weight on his left side-_

"_AH!"_

_Or maybe it hadn't. _

_A loud gasp then reverberated throughout the small alleyway as a large shadow fell over the boy's small broken form. _

"_Oh dear!" _

_Lawliet leaned his body back, supporting his weight with one arm arched behind him as an elderly woman (Or what Lawliet thought might have been an elderly woman. His distorted vision made it tough to see.) caught sight of his bruised and battered body. _

'_About time…' The five-year-old thought to himself as he flopped backwards once again, the exhaustion of not eating for three days and constant wavering in and out of consciousness wearing thin on the poor child's body as he fainted once again, seeing the destitute walls of the small alley one last time. _

'_Good riddance…' _

_Which was all Lawliet thought before all he saw was nothing but black. _

* * *

_It was dark in that room. _

_Lawliet couldn't stand the darkness. _

_So he left. _

_He let them patch him up, mind you. _

_But he didn't (couldn't) stay. _

_The hospital room was so quiet…_

_He felt dazed and confused, the drugs pumping through his body, combined with spurts of pain making him feel even more disoriented than usual, yet even worse than the silence of the room and the agonized confusion of the chemicals running in his body was the darkness…_

_It made him remember. _

_And Lawliet didn't __**want**__ to remember. _

_So he left. _

_And he refused to go back. _

* * *

_It was tiring at times. _

_Watching so many people walk by you, and no one acknowledging you even __**exist**__. _

_Lawliet was still not used to the lonely feeling._

_A part of the young boy, only the tender age of eight, wished someone would just reach a hand out and tell him it would all be alright. That he wouldn't have to feel this way for long. _

_He still dreamed of his parents. _

_Over time, the dreams, however, were becoming less and less frequent and less comprehensive._

_Their faces were slowly blurring over, their bodies melding along with the array of colors that made up his once-lively imagination. Lawliet knew if he just reached out a little bit further…_

_He would truly remember. _

_The small boy cringed as he anxiously dove behind a garbage can, tiny body cold from lack of warmth in the snowy city he now resided. He didn't even know its __**name**__. It seemed strange to think that Lawliet was now a wanderer... _

_And he couldn't really bring himself to care. _

_Obsidian eyes wearily glanced around before trudging upwards, ratty oversized sneakers stumbling over his petite feet as he got up, knowing he had to run; had to stay warm. _

_Maybe it'd be different one day. _

_For now though, this was his life. Whether it was a life well-spent was a question left for another day._

* * *

"_Yo, kid!" _

_Lawliet tiredly looked back, his lanky pre-teen body weary from exhaustion and lack of nutrients. _

_Nobody ever said it was easy living on the streets. _

_Five years had passed since that fateful night, a now ten-year-old Lawliet standing on a street corner, dirt encasing every visible (and non-visible) part of his body. Long bone-skinny arms hung by his side as a pair of tattered jeans hung half-hazardously on his barely-there hips. _

_A pale gaunt face hidden by the dirty strains of gritty hair turned to the side, ebony eyes shallow against the dark sockets that enveloped them. _

"_KID!" _

_Lawliet stayed silent, just staring at the clean clothed man running towards him, screaming at him. _

_He begged his feet to run, but they just wouldn't listen._

_Not anymore._

_The ten-year-old was tired; tired of running, tired of lying, tired of sleeping in the bitter cold and drowning in the sweltering heat, eating nothing but smallest of insignificant scraps…_

_Lawliet just wanted it all to end. _

"_Kid…" The man gasped, rasping from the sudden sprint as he put his hands to his knees and tried to catch his breath. "I just wanna… help…" _

_Maybe it would be better to put it in someone else's hands for once._

* * *

"_I'm sure you'll love it here, Lawliet!" _

'_That's what they all say…' The small 13-year-old thought to himself as he solemnly took in the brightly colored room, nearly gagging in the cheeriness of it all. _

_Lawliet was going to hate it here just as much as he hated the last five orphanages he had been in within the span of the last three years. _

_It was a curse to be as smart as he was. _

"_What do you think, Lawliet?" The woman beside him continued to prod, her overly-enthusiastic smile almost making his eye twitch. _

_Almost. _

_Lawliet said nothing as he simply walked to the farthest corner of the room and crouched down, thumb automatically coming to his mouth as he owlishly blinked. _

_He did not want to be here. _

_Not now, not __**ever**__. _

"_Lawliet?" _

_Yet still, no words escaped the boy's lips as he simply stared up at the woman with ghostly blank eyes, hoping she'd leave him alone if he stayed quiet enough. _

_They usually did… after awhile. _

* * *

"_Look at him! He's so creepy…" _

"_He's so quiet all the time. Sort of reminds me of that movie with the kids that controlled people's minds." _

"_Wouldn't doubt that." _

"_God, I think they took him out of a garbage can with the way the boy looks all the time." _

"_Looks like it." _

"_I hear he gets thrown out of every orphanage they send him off to because he's secretly psychotic." _

"_Wouldn't be surprised." _

"_I feel sick just looking at him…" _

"_What a freak." _

"_Stupid mute retard." _

_14-year-old Lawliet pushed himself further against the wall as the children continued to point and stare at him, words spilling from their mouths in a succession of discordant harmony. _

_Still his own lips stayed shut. _

_Still his agony lay cleverly hidden. _

_Still his heart refused to actually heal. _

"_Maybe his parents just didn't want him anymore?" _

"_Who would want a kid like that?" _

"_Probably threw him out after some freak accident."_

"_He's nothing but bad luck." _

_Ebony eyes closed as the boy slid down to the floor, the rest of the other children's voices drowning out against the pounding in his head. _

"_**He's nothing but bad luck." **_

_They had no idea. _

* * *

"_He's refused to say one word in the last five years, no matter what methods have been appointed."The stale voice spoke as if the fifteen-year-old was not in the room, shadowy eyes deceptively void of emotion as they blankly stared at the middle-aged man behind the desk in front of them. "I doubt he's really what you're looking for in a student." _

_The other man in the room simply shook his head, his dark hair swaying against his shoulders as the teen continued to ignore him. _

"_I think he's been misunderstood." The smooth-voiced man answered, sitting down with a small amount of flourish. "I've seen some of his artwork, and I think I truly see potenti-" _

"_Please, sir." The patronizing social worker shook his head as he tapped his pen against the mountains of paperwork scattered on his desk, perpetually unfinished. "You have to be reasonable. Even if what you say is true, what use is an artist with a broken mind and a silent voice? He wouldn't even be able to properly present his works of art to the world at hand!" _

"_I would rather try to speak to him myself and decide whether or not he could be managed, __**sir**__." The sharp edge in the long haired man's voice was not missed as the social worker stood up, rather huffily, and paced out of the room. _

"_Fine. You try reaching the impenetrable." _

_Narrowed eyes turned their full attention to the boy beside them, Lawliet still gazing at the desk in front of them as he began to gently gnaw on his thumb, not actually acknowledging the last man left in the empty cold room. _

"_I know what you're doing." _

_If Lawliet could have felt shocked, he would have._

_He would have. _

"_Pretty smart for a kid of fifteen." _

_But he would not be fooled by anyone ever again. _

_He would not feel attachment of any kind towards any other living person. _

_Or dead for that matter. _

"_You can't possibly think this place is the worse place to be…" _

_Lawliet's eyes traced the desk as his thumb began to bruise from the constant chewing. _

_A notebook, several pieces of lettered paper, pens, pencils…_

"_But I can show you something better if we just make a deal."_

_Lawliet stopped chewing his thumb, but his eyes still continued to slowly peruse the items on the small tableau in front of them. _

_More paperwork…_

"_You won't ever have to see another orphanage for as long as you live. Hell, you wouldn't have to see another __**person**__ if that was what you wanted." _

_Obsidian orbs then made their way to the older man as Lawliet's interest was finally piqued. _

"_I think you could be the best. I've seen it in the paintings you've done, and they're amateur for you at best. Let me be your teacher… and you'll get all the solitude you'll have ever wanted." _

_This had to be a joke. _

_But the look in the older man's eyes…_

"_All you have to do is shake my hand." Hazel eyes came ever so closer as the man leaned in, face to face with the stoic teen. "What do you have to lose?" _

_What __**did**__ Lawliet have to lose?_

_He'd been through all nine Hells and had come back up each time. And if this man was being truthful…_

_A lean pale hand lightly grasped the other man's grip as Lawliet continued to stare down at the ground, wondering if this was really the best thing to do. _

"_Good choice, kid. My name's Reiji Namikawa, by the way." The tanned hand tightened over Lawliet's own hesitant palm as the man's voice spoke of nothing but satisfaction. _

_Lawliet finally looked up, his dead gaze catching the older man off guard as Lawliet finally opened his mouth for the first time in nearly ten years and spoke, if albeit hesitantly._

"_Law… Lawliet. My name is Lawliet L." _

_Reiji smirked, dropping the boy's hand as Lawliet dropped his head down, wondering if he had just made a deal with the devil. _

"_Very nice to meet you, Lawliet. Very nice to meet you, indeed..." _

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Whisper" by Evanescence, which was recommended by my beta, Kitsune55. Yay!

And I live. Lol! Sorry, but you're getting this chapter after a very exhausting week. And an equally exhausted writer. And exhausted beta. Lol! Thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing the chapter, and thanks to you guys for reading. And by the by... HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMILY! MOMMY LOVES YOU! ((ahem)) Yeah. Just ignore that. Lol!


	26. Going the Roundabout Way

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Six: _Going the Roundabout Way _

* * *

"Ngh…"

'Huh?'

Raito groggily blinked as he attempted to prop himself up by his elbows, the arm located around his waist tightening excruciatingly as the young artist realized he was now trapped in the embrace of his unconscious lover.

The older man's lips trembled as he silently burrowed his wild head of hair into the brunette's shoulder, trapped within the confines of his dreams with seemingly no escape.

Cinnamon brown eyes glistened in worry as Raito very carefully slipped an arm out of the bone-breaking embrace and smoothed down the downy tufts of dark hair surrounding the better part of his chest, not sure how best to wake the awkward misfit without causing a panic.

'L…' Raito wrapped his free arm around the anonymous artist's torso, lightly closing his eyes as he attempted to comfort the dark haired man the best way he knew how. From what L had told him, the perverted artist had had his own demons lurking in the back of his mind; memories of a time long before Raito himself could ever imagine which held a tight rein on the artist's life and the persona he was today. Would allowing him to wallow in those memories really help the older man in the long run?

"Mmm…"

L hummed in his slumber as Raito placed a small kiss on his head, smiling as the tenseness in the agitated insomniac's shoulders softening ever so slightly. L was in a place that Raito could not reach him; at least, not at the moment.

Even if it was just a hunch…

Raito would stand back this time.

But just this once.

He had an example of maturity to keep up in this relationship, after all.

* * *

"_Lawliet?"_

"…"

_Lawliet didn't glance back at the man at his door, dark eyes concentrating on the empty canvas in front of them. Shaggy strains of ebony hair hung over the young boy's face as Lawliet attempted to block out the sudden intrusion of his privacy._

"_Lawliet, I need to speak with you." Reiji sighed, not sure what to do to with the thin student, as said teenager continued to stay quiet. _

_Then one solution hit him like a stack of bricks._

"_I bought cheesecake…"_

_SWING!_

"_Say what, now?"_

_Reiji sweat dropped as Lawliet swung around and plopped right in front of his stationary figure in front of the entrance to the boy's room, anxiously peering up at him with large onyx orbs filled with sudden delight. _

_Reiji sweat dropped once more. _

"_Cheese… cake?" Lawliet's pleading eyes widened as the older man's heart broke in two, though the expression on Reiji's face didn't show such emotions whatsoever. _

_The teacher feigned indifference as the younger boy stared up at him with such captivating murky eyes, the careful façade of emptiness the small 15-year-old boy constructed around himself dissolving as he began to (finally) act more his age. _

"_It's in the kitchen. If you would so kindly step out of your room for more than five seconds at a time, you would know that we usually keep a fresh stock of the best food right within your own reach." Reiji watched warily as the cold barrier was put into place once again, the words hitting more than one nerve in the boy's head. _

"_I'm fine."_

_As Reiji closed the door, all efforts exhausted for the time being, he couldn't help but think with one last glance thrown Lawliet's way-_

'_One more battle lost.' _

* * *

"_I never want to hear that name ever again." _

_Stoic murky eyes blanketed by the multitude of messy bangs that covered the 17-year-old's forehead stared straight into Reiji's, not hesitating in the slightest as the older man simply smirked in his direction. _

"_And why is that, __**Lawliet**__?" _

_The teenage artist said nothing more as he turned his attention back to his blank canvas, not sure how to answer the question without revealing something both so fragile and vital to his own being. _

_The teacher sighed before shaking his head, long ebony locks swaying in time with his head. It was yet another obstacle in between his young student and the peace he knew the young boy craved. Yet only L Lawliet would be able to free himself of the prison he had encased himself with. _

"_I worry for you, L." Reiji left it at that, refusing to elaborate even when his young protégé's eyes traced his figure as he walked out of the room, stopping at the door for the briefest of moments. _

'_Sensei…'_

"_I worry for myself as well, Sensei." L clutched at his knees, knowing the older man was once again disappointed at the lack of progression in the last two years. _

"_Then I suppose all we can do is worry together." Reiji smirked one last time before disappearing from the room and quietly shutting the door, encasing L in the self-inflicted cocoon he so loved to shelter himself in. _

'_If you say so, Sensei…' _

* * *

"_Hm." Reiji flipped the newspaper open as his eyes concentrated at the sudden bold print shouting out against the headlines-_

_**MYSTERIOUS ARTIST ON THE RISE! **_

_**Just who is the magnificent artist L, and why the anonymity?**_

_**Continued on page A10.**_

_Reiji blinked once. _

_And then blinked again. _

'_Well. I'll be damned…'_

_The older gentleman had known the boy would get recognized quickly, but this…_

_This was a whole new level of amazing!_

"_La-!" For a moment, Reiji bit his tongue, the familiar name hanging off his lips in a moment of forgetfulness. A sweeping sadness overcame the teacher's senses as the thought of just what this meant finally poured down over him. _

_Yes, his student's work was flourishing. Yes, he had succeeded in creating a true artist, with visions not contrived by the contemporary work 'surrounding' them. But…_

_His student, who had at one time held the simple hope to live, was dying._

_Not physically, of course. Not even mentally; something Reiji himself could attest to. The boy was a genius in every sense of the word. No, physically and mentally, the thriving student-turned-artist was at his peak. _

_Emotionally, however…_

_Reiji sighed as he placed the newspaper down on the table and stood up from his chair. Not looking back at the bolded headline, he poured himself a cup of coffee. _

_Unbeknownst to the long-haired teacher, L watched him silently from the kitchen entrance, eyes gazing at the bolded headline in impassive indifference. Should he feel proud…?_

_The 23-year-old simply slipped away from the kitchen, eyes once again set with a vague sense of detachment towards everything around them. That article..._

_L picked up a lollipop and twisted it around in his mouth. _

_Today was just another day. _

* * *

_L said nothing as the nameless young man quietly slipped out of the bed and began re-dressing their unclothed body, seeing themselves out of the door without another glance in his direction. _

_Murky eyes closed as the perspiration of the night's turbulent events still clung to his body, the heady smell of unadulterated fornication seeping all around the room. The 23-year-old pulled his knees up to his chest as the darkness of the room began to suffocate him, the tinge of alcohol burning his throat as the aftereffects of the substances he had taken began to make him shiver. _

_Everyday was the same old thing…_

_Stare at the walls. Sketch. Paint. Eat sweets. Paint. Read. Stare at the walls. Have Reiji-sensei say a couple of things to him. Sneak out. Get drunk. Get stoned. Have sex. Stare at the walls. _

_Only to start all over the next day. _

_His stomach gurgled, upset at both the lack of sustenance and the hazardous chemicals ingested. _

_L still continued to lay on the bed, staring vacantly at the wall whilst naked. _

_It was such a shame, Reiji-sensei would often say…_

_That such talent was wasted on someone like him. _

_If only L had the capacity to feel disappointed… _

_The young man shifted on top of the covers before getting up and trudging up towards his bathroom, not noticing the shivers raking up his own body at the drop of temperature within the already cool room. _

_He'd get his sketchpad later. _

* * *

"_I'm leaving, Lawliet." _

_L froze both at the words leaving his sensei's mouth and at the sound of the name he had shed so long ago. _

"_This is goodbye…"_

'_Good… bye?'_

"_You've grown so much since meeting the scrawny little 15-year-old that barely spoke more than three words at a time."_

'_Sensei's leaving… why is he leaving? Why is he…'_

_L said nothing as he pulled his knees closer to his chest and vacantly stared at his bent legs. _

'_Why is he leaving me alone?'_

"_I think it's time for you to sprout your own wings, Lawliet." _

_Dark eyes widened unconsciously as long fingers gripped the bony knees he was now resting his head upon. L felt something familiar creep inside his chest, squeezing his barely beating heart into a stony submission…_

_Somehow he had forgotten he knew how to feel altogether._

"_Did I… do something to anger Reiji-sensei?" L hesitantly asked, the words barely catching at his throat as the young artist began to wiggle his toes._

"_Of course not, L." The reassurance did little for the anxiety brewing in the pit of L's gut, his blank façade not giving anything away. "You didn't think I would stay with you forever, did you? Gotta get off of 'daddy's' lap sometime, Lawliet."_

"_I suppose so." _

_L brushed his hands off against the rough material of his ragged jeans and awkwardly stood up, not giving his teacher a second glance as he trudged up the staircase of their (now only his) newly bought living facilities. _

"_Goodbye." _

_Reiji's grip on his suitcase tightened momentarily before relaxing, a small weary smile perched on his face as the 25-year-old artist made his way to his room; the only room that seemed to be perpetually filled with the stoic man's presence. _

_The boy still had so much to learn, it seemed…_

_The older man straightened out his suit as he struggled to contain his cough, the heat of the room rising within his own body. Hazel brown eyes narrowed as Reiji cleared his throat and walked out of the door, not sure whether or not he was truly doing the right thing or not. _

"_Sayonara, Lawliet." _

_The whisper fell away against the gentle wind rustling the air around the older artist, the darkness of the house not yet a home stifled his lungs. With one last swing the door shut, irrevocably leaving L to his own devices once more. _

* * *

_L smirked as he glanced out of his window. A nearly middle-aged man stood nervously in front of his mansion steps. This man did not know what he was getting himself into…_

_Aizawa Shuichi wasn't sure what exactly to expect after the call he had received from the one-and-only Namikawa Reiji, but he had prepared himself for the worst in the 'any-case-scenario.' It was only natural, after all, since most artists came with all sorts of quirks and strange habits, to prepare a front for whatever appearances that needed to be made. _

_Especially when said artist was a gold-mine in the making. _

_The manager cleared his throat as he quietly rang the doorbell, waiting for a few moments before being pulled inside the mansion without so much of a hello._

"_The master of the house is waiting for you upstairs!" One of the maids cheerfully explained as she pulled him upstairs, his afro swaying unsteadily at the sudden lack of balance._

"_O… ok!"_

_Aizawa sweat dropped as they skidded to a halt, the maid only nodding her head before running off. Before he could even raise his hand to knock the door, the entrance to the room silently creaked open, a wide ebony colored eye glancing at him from the sliver of open space._

"_Are you Aizawa Shuichi?" _

"_Yes…?" _

"_Do you have any identification with you?"_

"_What?" Aizawa stood flabbergasted as the eye continued to scan him, not sure what to make of the whole situation at hand. _

"_I… D… Do you understand?" _

"_Oh, yeah… Give me a second."_

'_You weirdo.'_

"_Here ya go." _

"_Ah…" _

"_Hm."_

"_Er…"_

"_You have…"_

"_Yes?" The older man prodded, his patience waning._

"_Always had this gigantic afro?"_

_Face-fault/Sweat-drop Aizawa Combo._

"_Yeah." _

"_That is… funny. I enjoy your over-sized afro very much." _

_The older afroed man sweat dropped once more as the blank gaze looked him over, not quite sure what to make of the 27-year-old giving him a once over. _

'_I'm not a flipping car for Kami's-sake!'_

_Afro Jiggle of Annoyance._

"_I shall trust my sensei's judgment in both this and your sizeable hairstyle; you will have to do. I expect you to do your job with utmost competence and to manage my finances with care. Anything less than complete proficiency is unsatisfactory." _

_Aizawa's eye twitched._

"_Of course, sir." _

"_And please…" L rubbed his cloth sleeve against the bridge of his nose as he gave the man one last glance. "Clean up the mess the liquids pouring down from your humongous afro is leaving on my hardwood floor. I just got it waxed."_

_Afro Jiggle of Jerry-Curled-Twitchiness._

"_I'll get right on it."_

"_Very good." _

* * *

"_Is this all you do?" Aizawa questioned as yet another strange young man walked out of the bathroom and left the room without so much as a word. You'd think the man would be used to this by now, after nearly two years of both watching and attempting to help the anonymous artist…_

_L said nothing._

_Aizawa glanced around the room, broken bottles of liquor and random articles of clothing scattered around the room in a frenzied mess. The poor man grimaced in distaste. _

"_Tell me there's more to your life than… this?" The affronted manager kicked one of the bottles across the floor, creating more pieces of shattered glass on the newly carpeted floor. "Is this really all you do? Live without actually living?! This is no way to waste your life away, L!" _

'_If only everything was that simple, Aizawa…'_

"_Is Aizawa done with his mini-lecture? I wish to get dressed now." L blinked as the older man, weary with genuine worry, glanced back at him with an extremely distressed expression. _

"_I can't get through to you, can I?"_

'_Don't take it personally, Aizawa…'_

_L shrugged as the man left the room, his face not betraying the never-ending war fought within the confines of his mind. _

'_I doubt anyone could.' _

* * *

"_You need to get out more." _

"_No."_

"_Yes."_

"_No."_

"_Yes."_

"_No."_

"_Yes."_

"_No."_

_Afro Jiggle of __**DOOM**__!_

"_I SAID YES, DAMN IT!"_

"…"

"_Ahem."_

"_Aizawa's afro looks very agitated." _

"_L…" The over-worked manager glanced at the moping 30-year-old and realized that enough was enough. L was going to get out of the damn house and he was going to enjoy it, damn it! _

"_Aizawa is being a disturbance." L curled up into his signature fetal position against the comfortable arm-chair and wrapped his arms around his bent knees. "I do not need to go anywhere." _

"_Really?"Aizawa gave the man his best skeptical look, knowing it drove the artist up a wall when he did so. "You're 'Dante' collection is finally out; a far-cry from your usual fluff-tastic crud you put absolutely no effort into. Don't you at least want to see the fruits of your labor?" _

"…"

_Aizawa decided to go to another, much more well received tactic. _

"_Or at least see if said fruits of labor will get you laid?"_

_Before Aizawa could even say 'McCrazy in a nut-sack!' L was already up and out the door, hands shoved inside his pockets. _

"_I'm in." _

_Aizawa sighed, his afro drooping in melancholy._

"_Once a hentai... always a hentai." _

* * *

_L was struck. _

_Completely and utterly… struck. _

_There was absolutely no other word to describe it. _

_Cinnamon brown eyes haunted him as he left the museum, the other man's smooth tenor voice ringing within his ears as he leaned against the cool wall of the building. He felt breathless for some strange reason. _

'_Raito…' _

_L had to see the utterly gorgeous, yet still so innocently cute boy again. _

_Plans of computer hacking data-bases and undercover stalking (It's not stalking… it's obsessive shadowing L thought to himself as chewed on a piece of liquorice) were already forming in the back of the artist's head as a warmth he had thought he had lost so long ago began to dig deep within his chest. _

_This boy… _

_He was going to be the end of him. _

'_But at least if it is the end…' L thought to himself as he lumbered down the sidewalk, Rolls Royce waiting for him on the other side of the street. _

"_I will be going down with a smile." _

* * *

"_Where are you going, L?" _

_Aizawa blinked as the older man said nothing, plucking on some old ratty sneakers without so much as a blink. _

"_L…?" _

"_I am going out to meet with my boyfriend." _

"_B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-"_

_L scratched the top of his head rather disinterestedly. _

"_B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-"_

'_I wonder if I have any candy left in the car…'_

"_**BOYFRIEND?!**__"_

"_Yes." _

'_I know I bought some a couple of weeks ago…' _

"_Are you serious?!"_

"_Yes."_

"_Serious, serious?!"_

_Sigh. "Yes." _

"… … _Really?" _

"_Yes, Aizawa. Really."_

"_And… he doesn't mind you're a complete and utter pervert with no social skills whatsoever? This guy must be a miracle from God himself!"_

"_Well…"_

_Sweat drop. _

"_I thought this was too perfect to be true."_

_L said nothing more as he felt his cell-phone begin to vibrate-_

"_**I don't think you're ready for this Jelly! I don't think you're ready for this Jelly! I don't think you're ready for this; cuz my body too bootylicious for ya, babe!" **_

"_Ah… Raito-kun!"_

_Aizawa didn't even have to wonder what captivated the artist about his supposed boyfriend. _

'_Bootylicious indeed…' _

"_L." Before L could pick up the phone, Aizawa gave him a rather stern glare, an air of seriousness clouding the two gentlemen as they stared at each other. "Are you happy?" _

'_Am I… happy?'_

"_**I don't think you're ready for this Jelly!"**_

_L smirked before snapping his phone open and walking out the door, not giving his stunned manager a second glance as he made his way to his Rolls Royce. _

"_**I don't think you're read-"**_

"_I've missed you, Raito-kun."_

_If this was the closest to happiness L would ever get, he was pretty sure the real thing was over-rated anyways._

* * *

"You need to wake up, L."

"Hm…"

"L…"

"Five… more…"

"Urgh... I... I'm not wearing any underwear…"

Pop.

CRASH!

"DAMN IT, L!"

L blinked as the younger man underneath him twitched, his bottom most likely bruised beyond repair.

"Raito-kun only has himself to blame."

"IN YOUR DEMENTED WORLD, MAYBE!"

"Hush, Raito…" Raito glared up at the dark-haired man, not sure what to make with the strange vulnerability in L's eyes. "Let us enjoy the moment, yes?"

"… … … You're not going to try to rape me, are you?"

"Oh, Raito-kun…" L snuggled the loveable misanthropic artist with a slight smile. "It's not rape if you want it too."

Raito stiffened, in more ways than one.

"GET YOUR GOD DAMN HANDS OUT OF MY PANTS, L!"

"But Raito-kun, it's been two weeks!"

"Two weeks my ass!"

"... ass indeed."

Grope.

"GAH! DAMN IT, I SAID HANDS OUT OF MY PANTS... NOW, MISTER!"

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own "Bootylicious" by Destiny's Child. Because really, I doubt anyone is really ready for that jelly. Lol!

Hah, I'm alive! And I brought cookies! Lol! Many thanks to Kitsune55 for the corrections made and the awesome 'obsessive shadowing' line. It positively had me cracking up laughing once I read it. (So sounds like something L would say!) Thanks for sticking around for this long, you guys! Hopefully, the next chapter shouldn't take as long to write.

And by the way... I HIT 1000 REVIEWS! WOOOOOOOT! I LOVE YOU ALL! See ya soon!

* * *


	27. When In Doubt

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Seven: _When in Doubt_

* * *

"I have to go home eventually, you know."

"Does Raito-kun have to leave right this second?"

Raito sighed as a pair of large gleaming onyx eyes stared up at the 23-year-old in question, begging him to sit beside the perverted artist once more.

"I…"

"Raito-kun will make me very sad if he leaves now." L stated, his eyes widening to epic proportions. "I need his support at this most distressing of times."

"Are you…" Raito gaped down at the scrawny figure still inhabiting the tempting bed, not sure what to make of the current situation. "Trying to guilt me into staying?"

"That depends, Raito-kun." A small, almost completely imperceptible smirk lay across the pale thin lips as L eyed the younger man who shifted rather uncomfortably at the sudden perusal. "Is it working?"

Raito's eye twitched.

"You son-of-a-"

Before Raito could even finish his train of thought (and swear), a banging was heard from L's door, heavy-handed hits rattling the innocent doorway.

"L?! Yagami-kun?!" Aizawa's deep voice rose with panic at the sound of each name, both men blinking moronically at the strange interruption from the afroed man. "You two haven't killed each other, have you? Or molested each other to death? Wait… if it's the later, I don't think I wanna know…"

"No." L's faintly annoyed monotone rung throughout the rather spacious room, throwing off the cutesy charade the older man had been attempting to woe Raito with. "But this 'molesting to death' sounds like an interesting concept… since neither Raito nor I have had sex with each other yet, I suggest leaving us alone so that we may spend quality 'molesting' time without further interruption."

Raito didn't know who was more uncomfortable; him, Aizawa, or Aizawa's poor, innocent afro.

A heavy sigh was heard outside the door as Aizawa unmistakably banged his head against the board of wood.

"L… you really need to lay off the sugar. It's like freaking Viagra for you, isn't it?"

"Wouldn't be surprised." Raito muttered, coughing to cover up his comment.

L pretended to ignore the small smirk now resting on Raito's lips.

"Aizawa and his monstrous afro are still here. Go so that I may get my groove on." The man stated rather dryly, knowing the exact expression on his lover's face if he were to turn and look.

Extremely pissed off face #398.

"IS THAT THE ONLY REASON YOU WANTED ME TO STAY, YOU PERVERTED FREAK?!" Raito finally shouted from the top of his lungs, chestnut brown eyes narrowing dangerously, as L's impending answer spelled certain doom for their sex lives (or lack thereof).

"… Is that a trick question, Raito-kun?"

"I'm going home… NOW!"

Before Raito could even move, L sprung forward, catching the man off guard as he threw himself on top of the unsuspecting man, eyes narrowed in frustration as his mouth stretched out into a thin line.

"Raito-kun…" L stared right into his lover's twitching gaze as Raito glared up at the maniacal artist. "I want to have sex, and I want to have it now."

"NOT MY PROBLEM, MR. MC-JACKOFF! GET THE-MMPH!"

In two shakes of a pervert's ass, the older (and much more disturbed, apparently) artist captured Raito's lips in a sloppy lip-lock, grabbing the boy's shoulders as he pulled him closer to himself.

Raito flailed his arms in desperation as his eyes widened, his anger reaching new pinnacles of height.

'Oh no he didn't…'

PUSH!

**CRASH!**

"You sexually depraved pervert!"

L blinked as Raito quickly ran to the other side of the room, his eye twitching sporadically in a show of annoyance.

"Raito-kun is being especially prudish at this moment." The artist crankily observed, crouched on the ground as he began rubbing his side. The pain of being pushed down on the floor began to pound anxiously against his hip as the man only thought of the problem that lay within his pants. "Did I say something to offend?"

"You mean more than the usual?!"

"Raito-kun knows I love having sex with him." L pouted. "And it has been such a long time…"

"Well…" Raito began to crack under the large puppy-dog eyes sent his way, faux tears glimmering within the ebony depths as the older man stuck out his lower lip to complete the chibi look of doom. "I mean… I… like it, too…"

The artist had almost no chance to prepare himself before a mob of blue jeans, stained white tee-shirt and onyx black hair threw itself upon him.

_**GLOMP!**_

Eye twitch.

"THAT DOESN'T MEAN I WANT TO DO IT RIGHT NOW!"

"But Raito-kun…"

"_**Marky-Mark and I'm here to move you; Rhymes will groove you, and I'm here to prove to you that we can party on the positive side and pump positive vibes, so come along for the ride!**_

"Err…"

"I think I need to speak to Sayu-chan about her pick of song choices on your cell phone, Raito-kun." L deadpanned, feeling the vibrations of the cell phone within Raito's pocket, which lay (conveniently, Raito supposed) underneath the pervert's thigh.

"L… get off." The boy gritted off, not noticing the raccoon-eyed man's very aggravated frown as Raito wriggled beneath him.

"If Raito-kun would stop being so difficult," L snapped, "I am quite sure getting off would be quite easier **done** than _said_."

"Do you always have to interject some sort of sexually meaning into every conversation we have?!"

"Does Raito-kun have to be such a complete cock-blocker during every conversation we have?!"

"_**It's such a good vibration; it's such a sweet sensation!"**_

"You act like we never have sex! Before you mysteriously disappeared, we were at it every five seconds!"

"And now I am back, therefore we should have been at it about… 12 hours ago. If we begin now and manage to stay in bed for the next five days without leaving the room, I suppose we'll be able to make up for the time in wild spurts of raucous sex romps." The artist didn't even blink as he began to gnaw at his thumb, growing anxious at the thought of non-stop sex with his incredibly hot partner.

Raito could only stare at L in disbelief, not sure his brain could comprehend the amount of anger this one man could inspire just by being himself.

L simply stared right back, knowing he would win if it actually came down to a staring contest.

So the two stared.

"…"

"…"

And stared.

"…"

"…"

And stared.

"You know, staring at me like that won't magically make me give you a hand-job." Raito quipped; quite sure the man could win at any staring contest he initiated, but still not willing to back down from the challenge.

"And staring at me like that won't magically make me stop wanting to fornicate." L mockingly snapped right back, knowing that if he pushed hard enough, he'd have his boyfriend writing beneath him in a naked sweat.

A naked sweat that would include handcuffs, gag balls and a lot of spanking, of course.

L had a lot of kinkiness to make up for, you know.

"You're horrible, you know that."

"Raito-kun let's me know that daily."

"_**It's such a good vibration; it's such a sweet sensation!"**_

Raito sweat dropped.

"L… what if it's my sister? I left her at the club last night…" The younger man snapped up, suddenly worried about just what might have happened after he left.

What if she was molested?!

Or raped?!

Or killed?!

Or kidnapped?!

Or…

Or…

Well, Raito couldn't think of anything else, actually.

"Raito-kun, what were you thinking?!" L got off his lover, reaching for the still vibrating (and singing) phone within the 23-year-old's pocket.

"She was with Misa!" The younger artist replied, not sure if that constituted for something.

L gave the boy a flat stare, not even dignifying the response with a comment.

"Just give me the phone!" Raito snatched the phone, snapping it open without (once again) checking who it was beforehand. "Hello?"

"…"

"Hello?"

"…"

"He-llo…"

"… Raito-sama has such a pretty voice."

Raito face-faulted.

"Oh, fuck me."

"WHEN AND WHERE?!"

Raito's eye twitched.

"In a place called 'in your dreams' and how about now?"

Click.

"Raito-kun?! What is the matter?" L stroked the boy's arm as his eye twitched, not sure if he could handle an extra-perverted L and an all-the-time-creepy Mikami.

That was too much, even for him.

"I have to call my sister, L." Raito ignored the man's question altogether and snapped open his phone once again, not even deigning to look in the other man's direction.

"Nobody is stopping Raito-kun from doing so." The enigmatic artist huffed out, relaxing his body even further. L's libido was off the charts, and he'd be damned to not at least get something out of the man underneath him.

"Can you get off me, please?" Raito sweetly asked, attempting to go the cute route. Large brown eyes glistened as the artist pouted, internally smirking in satisfaction as L squirmed above him.

"… No."

"L-"

"Raito-kun's lusciously delicious body shall stay underneath my own until either an emergency calls for either of our attentions or we pass out from the monstrous amounts of sex I plan to have in about five minutes." L cut the agitated brunette's cute tirade before he could even begin, quite sure that if he didn't get both of them naked within the time allotted, someone was going to get either killed or man-raped.

L was going to go with man-raped.

"But Ryuu-chan…" Raito made one last attempt, almost managing to break the sugar-addict's concentration.

Almost.

"Raito-kun's pout shall not work with this time. I want some booty, and I want it now. I am being generous and allowing Raito-kun this time to call his little sister to check on her state. After that, it is no holds barred."

"You really can't function without sex, can you?" Came incredulous reply out of Raito's succulent mouth. L attempted to ground his head down from the clouds.

And away from his pants.

"My rationale and coping skills raise 99.9 percent after copious amounts of kinky 'get-back-together' sex. It is one of my body's abnormalities." L blinked down at the doubtful sex-kitten, quite sure he did not believe a word coming out of his mouth. "Please stop giving me that look, Raito-kun. It is all true."

"Well, at least I know you're bullshitting skills are still up to par." Raito muttered, dialing his little sister number with one hand while still pushing the pervert away with the other.

"That hurts, Raito-kun."

"Oh, I'm sure."

"Raito-kun's sarcasm does not amuse me. I shall require sex as compensation towards my wounded feelings."

"You would, wouldn't you?"

"What does Raito-kun mean by that?"

Raito just ignored the question altogether. It wasn't even worth it at this point.

The phone ringing from the other line carried the up and coming artist away from the constantly-horny man still hovering over him and back to the situation at hand. A newfound worry began to crawl inside his head as the phone continued to ring, but no answer came from the other line.

"Raito-kun?"

"She's not picking up, L."

Raito hung up as the young girl's voicemail echoed in his ears, dialing the number once again just to receive the same response.

Oh hell no.

"L-"

"I shall get the car ready, Raito-kun. Call Misa and your parent's home until I return to see if she is in either location."

Without another word L hopped up and shuffled out of the room, the 23-year-old worrying all the more. Raito sat up off the ground and dialed Misa's number, only to have his call forwarded to her voicemail. He then attempted to call the house only to be faced with the answering machine.

Now he was really worried.

The anxiety-ridden brunette stood up, running a shaky hand through his slightly mussed locks.

Tense shoulders rolled back as Raito attempted to think of where everyone could be. There was only one thing to do in a situation like this. Raito steeled his gaze as L entered the room once again, the younger man knowing he had no choice in the matter.

"L… I'm going home."

"To your apartment, Raito-kun?"

"No." Raito shivered, not looking forward to the inevitable. "My..."

"Hm?" The anonymous artist blinked, not sure why his lover's face was now a three shades paler, his lips twisted in a very unattractive frown.

"My parent's house."

* * *

__

"I must ask; what is Raito-kun so apprehensive about?" L asked as both men exited the mansion and made their way to the Rolls Royce parked outside.

"You haven't seen the news, have you?" Raito quietly questioned, wincing at the thought of the news report made just a few weeks back.

L smirked.

"I guess you have, then." The boy sighed, knowing there was no way he was going to survive the dreaded meeting with his father. "Well, I've kind of been avoiding my dad since the… very public and televised outing."

"Raito-kun is worried his father will now kill him." L stated, his face still holding that infuriating little smirk.

"I'm not worried he's going to kill me. I KNOW he's going to kill me." Raito rolled his eyes as they both entered the car, his anxiety not lessening in the least. "And you too for that matter. God knows he hates you enough as it is. I'm pretty sure he's just looking for a reason to tan your hide."

"I wouldn't mind it if Raito-kun tanned my hide. Preferably naked."

"L… shut the hell up."

The older man chuckled rather awkwardly, making Raito smile whilst he wasn't looking.

"I think some music is in order to relax Raito-kun's poor nerves." L stated, the driver blinking as he revved up the engine. "Turn on the radio, if you would please."

The driver did not hesitate, not noticing Raito suddenly glaring at L as he slapped his hand away from his bottom.

"What, Raito-kun? I am simply attempting to assuage some of Raito-kun's more prominent fears by giving him physical comfort."

"Oh, shut it you-"

"_**It's getting stronger and stronger, and when I get that feeling, I want Sexual Healing! Sexual Healing, oh baby…"**_

"Even Marvin Gaye wants us to get it on, Raito-kun." L purred, Raito sweat dropping in response.

Figures even L's radio would try to get him to have sex with its owner.

"_**Makes me feel so fine; helps to relieve my mind… Sexual Healing baby, is good for me-"**_

"YOU CAN CHANGE THE STATION NOW!" Raito yelled out at the conveniently oblivious driver, the older man sweat dropping at the view of Raito pushing off the perverted artist as he attempted to straddle his lap.

The man shook his head as he flicked the dial.

"_**I want your sex!"**_

"NOT HELPING!"

The driver's face turned an unspeakable shade of red as he saw a white blur of cloth whiz by his face and land on the front seat.

It seemed his boss was now shirtless.

"_**I want you; I want your... sex!"**_

The driver once again flicked the dial, hoping against all hope that his luck was better this time around.

"_**Get down, give in, I'm born to make you sing! Just play with me; you'll see me on my knees."**_

"Oh, I hate you all." The driver heard the younger man mutter before another swish of cloth was seen whizzing by his head, another shirt now next to the one sitting innocently on the passenger's seat next to him. A series of moans began to float up from the back seat.

The driver refused to look into his mirror to see what the hell was now transpiring from the now complacent artist and his equally horny employer.

"L…"

"_**Get down and feel the best you've ever been, I need so bad what grows inside my head, my head."**_

The volume was inconspicuously raised, the older man wanting nothing more than to erase the last five minutes from out of his head.

Though when you were L's driver… that was usually the case anyway.

* * *

Lips melded against each other as hands blindly groped whatever expanse of skin that was in immediate reach. Raito gasped as L's cool fingers began to tug at his pants, cinnamon colored eyes fluttering as his heated skin demanded more attention from the pervert above him.

"Raito-kun, there is one last thing I wish to tell you." The dark-eyed pervert exhaled, his breathing becoming erratic.

"What is it?" Raito's arms wrapped around L's shoulders as the mysterious artist blinked, a slightly apprehensive look overcoming his visage.

"Raito…" Strands of shaggy hair fell over Raito's forehead as L's hypnotic gaze captured Raito's own, both men stranded in their own world. "I…"

"We're here, sirs."

Both men froze.

"Uh…"

"Yes. Of course." L hesitantly got off the younger man, grabbing both his shirt and Raito's while the younger of the two blinked up in confusion. "Thank you."

"No problem." The driver squeaked, refusing to actually face either of them. He was quite sure he was scarred for life, thanks.

Raito's face became a vibrant shade of red as he realized he had just made out with L with his driver listening all the while.

Damn the pervert in all his sexiness.

"Here, Raito-kun. Let us make haste so that I may finally be granted access to your bum."

Raito sighed as he slipped on the shirt, knowing he was going to hate every second of this.

"Let me live through this… if only to kick the shit out of you in the end."

"And have sex with me."

Raito sweat dropped.

"Of course, L. Of course."

* * *

Disclaimer: I... am going lyric crazy. And I'm loving every minute of it. Lol! I don't own "Sweet Vibrations" by Marky Mark (Otherwise known as Pre-Cool Mark Wahlberg) and the Funky Bunch. Yes... that is seriously their name people under the age of 15. Lol! Nor do I own "Sexual Healing" by the late great Marvin Gaye, "I Want Your Sex" by George Michaels and finally "Get Down - Give In (The Sex Song)" by Slick Idiot. Love me, I'm full of perverted song lyrics. Lol!

Ha, even after all the angst I've still got the magic when it comes to humor! Score one for me. Lol! Many thanks to my wonderful beta, Kitsune55. She's the bomb-diggity, yo. XD And many thanks to you guys for sticking around this long. Only three more chapters... then my baby is done. Can you believe it?? I think I'll go cry now. ((sniffle))


	28. If I Could Say the Words

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Eight: _If I Could Say the Words_

* * *

"Hello?"

Raito blinked as he knocked the door once again, receiving no answer in response. The 23-year-old frowned to himself as L began to scratch the bottom of his heel against his jeaned-leg, wide eyes gleaming uncomfortably in the early afternoon light.

"Well, that's strange." The young brunette mumbled to himself as he reached into his pocket, pulling out his enormous set of keys, all jingling rather obnoxiously as Raito attempted to try each one against the lock on the door.

"Is Raito-kun a janitor in his spare time?" L questioned, blinking in disbelief.

"Why do you ask that?" The brown-eyed man inquired, still fumbling with his large mass of multiple keys.

"…"

Large charcoal colored eyes simply stared at the conveniently unaware 23-year-old, not sure how to take the sudden naivety.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Raito asked while innocently gazing at the artist, the large ring of keys hanging off his fingers as L's eye twitched.

The boy blinked in obliviousness.

"… No reason, Raito-kun." L replied dryly, not sure how his lover could be so smart and yet still so stupid.

It amazed even him, sometimes.

"You're weird, L." Raito ignored the muttered insult sent his way ('_Raito-kun manages to keep an ensemble of keys that never seem to jingle nor bulge out from inside the pockets of his extremely tight pants at all times, and I'M the strange one for observing such a thing?_' the older man snapped back) and finally managed to open the door, smiling in both relief and excitement.

"He-llo…" The moody brunette called out once again, slipping out of his shoes and carefully looking around the seemingly empty house.

"_Uh…" _

Raito stiffened in the hallway, L coming up behind him as he stared up at the staircase in disbelief.

"Did you hear that?" The light-haired artist panicked, his face crumpled up in anxiousness as he grabbed L's hand, the sound of someone continuously groaning and another moaning reverberating down the stairs.

"Did you?" L replied, not really sure what to make of the strange moans and groans.

"_Ngh…"_

"Sounds like somebody is dying up there…" Auburn colored hair swayed in time with the movements of younger man's head shaking in question, not sure if he wanted to know just what was going on in the household.

"_Oh…"_

"Did you hear that, too?!" Raito exclaimed, now definitely sure he didn't want to know what was going on. The voice was starting to sound strangely familiar…

"I most definitely did, Raito-kun." L brought up his free hand to his lips, gently chewing on his thumb as Raito huddled up closer to his person, feeling even more frisky than usual.

"Do you think… we should go up there?" The boy meekly suggested, both rationality and cowardice warring a battle inside his own head. There was really no reason to be scared…

But something inside of Raito was most definitely telling him he did NOT want to go up those stairs.

"I don't know, Raito-kun…" L murmured, the same feeling crawling up the pit of his stomach.

"_Grr…"_

'WTF?!' Both men thought to themselves as they glanced at each other, eyes both widening to epic proportions.

"_Oh… Sou-chan…"_

CRASH!

"We… have to go now." Raito muttered, quite sure he was now scarred for life.

"…" L simply stared at Raito, not sure whether or not he should be turned on or not.

This was the first time in his life his libido actually felt confused.

"_You like that darling?"_

Raito's face turned a disgusting shade of putrid green.

He was quite sure no child should ever have to hear the things he was hearing his parents doing, so very, very loudly.

"_You know I do, Sou-chan! Ah!"_

"L…" Raito shut his eyes, dragging his stumped lover by the arm whilst putting on his shoes, barely giving his boyfriend enough time to do the same. "I think we should go to Misa's house."

"Agreed, Raito-kun." L allowed himself to be dragged out of the house, eyes wide with shock. The anonymous artist was quite sure his parent-in-law's (That's what they were, damn it!) had just ruined any chance he would have had of getting laid in his boyfriend's old bedroom…

Or in that house in general.

Or near that house in general.

Or just in general.

"_Yeah! Harder! Deeper!"_

"_Like that?"_

"_YES!"_

"I think… I need to throw up." Raito quickly slammed the door shut, pulling his lover out of the house and into the Rolls Royce still parked out front, practically running to the car as L simply kept his mouth shut and allowed Raito to lead the way.

Even his perverseness had limits, and that limit had been reached about five minutes ago.

"_Sweetie, did you hear something?"_

"_Nope, not a word. Get the paddle out, won't you dear?"_

"_Of course, sweet heart." _

* * *

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

The driver frowned as both his employer and his boyfriend stayed silent, only speaking when giving the driver instructions to the location they were now heading. He couldn't believe it, but there was no molestation whatsoever during the entirety of the car ride.

Did his boss learn the art of self-control within the last fifteen minutes?

The driver doubted it…

But still! There was a good six inches of space in between the two men, both gentlemen looking quite uncomfortable as they refused to meet each other's gaze.

Maybe a little music wouldn't be so bad…

"_**Marinate the nether rod in the squish mitten. Power drill the yippee bog with the dude piston. Pressure wash the quiver bone in the bitch wrinkle. Cannonball the fiddle cove-Ooh la la-With the pork steeple."**_

Raito and L only looked that much more uncomfortable.

"_**If I get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then, in lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though I Brazilian wax poetic so hypothetically I don't wanna beat around the bush…"**_

The driver didn't even bother to touch the dial as he sweat dropped in disappointment.

"_**Foxtrot, Uniform, Charlie, Kilo! Foxtrot, Uniform, Charlie, Kilo!" **_

Both men looked at anything besides each other as the song continued to play, their libidos crushed for the time being despite the suggestive lyrics.

"_**Put the you-know-what in the you-know-where! Put the you-know-what in the you-know-where!"**_

"Let's make a pact to never speak of this… ever." Raito mumbled, his face a pale crisp white as his fists clenched in frustration.

"_**Pronto!"**_

"Agreed." L concurred, quite sure that if he ever wanted to get laid again, he'd have to erase the extremely disturbing images of Raito's parent's doing the nasty in his head with something a hell of a lot more pleasant.

"GAH! GET YOUR HANDS AWAY FROM MY PANTS, RYUUZAKI! NOW IS **NOT** THE TIME!"

Like him and Raito doing the nasty, for instance.

"But Raito-kun, what better time than the present to erase these most… disconcerting images with a good make-out session? I'll make it worth your while…"

"What do you mean… by… that…?"

The artist blinked as the perverted man next to him grinned creepily. The younger artist blanched as the radio's bass began to hum within the car, shaking his head in exasperation as the creepy grin got that much wider.

_**"I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love; Love's going to leave me..."**_

"Bow-chica-wow-wow…"

Raito sweat dropped as the man beside him began to strip, slowly pulling his shirt off once again, his face as blank as always.

"You cannot be serious." The younger man backed up against the car door, quite sure that doing it with his boyfriend was now officially off his to-do list.

His parents had a way of ruining things for him without even trying.

"Raito-kun, I am desperate and in need of your assistance. Would you leave your boyfriend in this distraught state?" L tilted his head to the side, sliding his shirt off his arms as he peered at his lover with large shimmering eyes.

_**"I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt; So sexy it hurts..."  
**_

"… … So would the erection in your pants be considered 'distraught' as well?" Raito gave the man a dry stare, eye twitching as L began to tug on his pants.

"If it was, would Raito-kun caress it and make it feel all better?"

"…"

"Raito-kun? Would you? Please? At least a tiny bit?"

_**"And I'm too sexy for Milan-" **_

Tug.

_**"Too sexy for Milan-" **_

Pull.

_**"New York and Japan..."  
**_

Zip.

_**"And I'm too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party; No way I'm disco dancing."  
**_

"You… are sick."

_**"I'm a model, you know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the catwalk-"**_

"If I am sick, then I am certain my needs must be attended to. Raito-kun, take off your pants and attend to my damn needs. Bow-chica-bow-chica-wow-wow…"

_**"Yeah, on the catwalk on the catwalk, yeah!"**_

Tug.

_**"I do my little turn on the catwalk..."  
**_

Tug.

_**"I'm too sexy for my car-" **_

Strip.

_**"Too sexy for my car-"**_

Vein Pop.

_**"Too sexy by far..."**_

"ALRIGHT, STOP IT WITH THE STRIPPING ALREADY!"

"But Raito-kun…"

The driver winced as he stared straight ahead, quite sure that if there was ever a time he wished he had another job, it was now.

* * *

"Does Raito-kun have a massive set of keys for Misa's home as well?"

Raito's eye twitched, watching the man zip up his pants as he exited the car and shuffled towards the younger man entering the apartment building.

"… … Yes."

"Ah. Surprise, surprise."

Eye twitch.

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing, Raito-kun. Nothing at all…"

The annoyed brunette muttered a rather colorful array of words aimed towards the painter in question under his breath as he pulled out another set of keys from his pocket, hoping against high hope that this time, he would not have to hear or see anything that would scar him for life.

'I may never do the nasty ever again…' Raito shivered unconsciously, L choosing to ignore what could have brought on the creeped out look set on his lover's face.

Raito wasn't the only one permanently scarred from the day's events.

'And it's not even two o'clock yet.' Both men thought simultaneously, one lamenting over the lack of sex in his life at that moment in time whilst the other just lamented his life in general.

It was pretty obvious who was thinking what.

"What does Raito-kun think we shall find in Misa-san's apartment?" L queried as he gave the boy a knowing look.

Raito's face then turned three different shades of red all at once.

"You mean besides Misa and Sayu?" The cinnamon-eyed man squeaked, making the older man that much more suspicious as they both waited for the elevator next to an elderly woman and what looked to be her grandson.

"Yes, Raito-kun, besides Sayu and Twiddle-Dumb." Ebony eyes widened as they blankly stared up at the rigid young man beside them, Raito refusing to meet the suddenly very intimidating gaze quickly analyzing him.

"I don't know what you're talking about." The smooth lie exited Raito's lush lips rather easily, the artist patting himself on the back as he turned to lock eyes with his gutter-minded lover.

L simply continued to gaze up at the still flushed man, his eyes bordering on bug-eyed as the dark-haired man continued to widen his impervious stare.

"Raito-kun is hiding something from his boyfriend." The paranoid artist announced quite loudly, the older woman and child suddenly swinging their heads around to stare at the mortified 23-year-old and his apparently very much gay boyfriend. "Probability of finding something that will either anger me or embarrass Raito-kun up 38 percent."

"Ryuuzaki…" Raito growled out warningly, L continuing on without even stopping to acknowledge is irate lover.

"I doubt Raito-kun will have sexual relations with me tonight if he continues to lie to me the way he does…" L drawled out, his thumb straying to his mouth as the grandmother's jaw dropped, hands immediately coming down to cover her grandson's no longer virginal ears.

Raito's eye twitched just for good measure.

_Ting!_

The elevator swayed open as both men walked inside, neither surprised when neither the grandmother nor the grandson approached the still open door.

In fact, it was safe to say they both took a very large step back and hoped to high heaven they were not going to be on the same floor as the two eccentric artists.

"Do you have to embarrass me everywhere we go?" Raito muttered, caught in between wanting to laugh hysterically and wanting to punch the aggravating insomniac.

"Does Raito-kun really want the answer to his question?" L hung back against one of the elevator's walls, a triumphant gleam lurking within his unblinking sight. "I suppose that whatever is inside Misa's apartment shall both anger me and embarrass you, then?"

"Best of both fucking worlds…" Raito glared down at his shoes, hoping L could not hear his agitated murmurs. "Yay for me."

"What was that, Raito-kun?"

_Ting!_

"You'll see soon enough…"

Raito pushed past the confused pervert, walking towards the right apartment with a new-found dread. Hopefully Sayu was inside the living room, waiting for them to greet her and wish her a fond fare-thee-well so that he could go home and FINALLY get some damn work done.

And possibly get mauled by L.

But only if he didn't piss him off. Otherwise, L could kiss his perfectly toned ass.

The door quietly swung open, both artists apprehensively toeing inside the both very spacious and very _pink _apartment as they eyed all available exits (i.e. the door the two arrived in) and continued forward, hoping to have better luck this time.

Unfortunately for Raito, this was not the case.

"Misa's tastes in apartments are very… flamboyant to say the least, Raito-kun." L commented as he stared at the multiple half-naked pictures the girl had placed on the walls of herself.

Raito sweat dropped.

As both men continued down the rather large hallway, L peered into one of the many rooms open, nearly tripping over his own sneaker-clad feet in sudden uncharacteristic shock.

"Raito-kun…"

"Yes, L?" The younger man winced as L's mouth went slack and his thumb fell from his lips.

"Is that… a shrine?"

"…"

"Is that a shrine… to Raito-kun?!"

"…"

"Why does Misa hold a shrine for Raito-kun?!"

"…"

"Raito." L commanded quite seriously. "Look at me."

Raito furtively glanced up at his semi-irate lover.

"Why is there a giant life-sized picture of a posing nude Raito hanging above a shrine dedicated to him in Misa's apartment?" The older man ground out, his face as impassive as ever.

"Because Rai-chan sure does some weird stuff for his lovers!" An extremely peppy voice exclaimed from behind the dismayed brunette, quite sure he was going to kill his best friend later. "You wouldn't believe how many crazy-crazies Raito has gone out with! Some of them even put YOU to shame, Ryuuzaki!"

L's lips curved into the most miniscule of frowns, but though L's face remained relatively expressionless, Raito could definitely see the rage blazing within the artist's eyes.

"And just how many lovers **has **Rai-chan had, Misa-san?"

Even Misa had the good grace to shut her mouth and not answer that question.

It only made L all the more furious.

"I demand that this shrine be decimated and that the picture of Raito lay within my possession!"

Both Raito and Misa stared at the artist rather knowingly.

"I would rather not think about what you would do with a giant nude picture of me within your house, L." Raito snapped, shutting his eyes as he began kneading the bridge of his nose with his hand.

The perverted grin on L's face said it all.

"Besides, Misa-Misa paid a lot of money for that picture!" Misa exclaimed, face a bright crimson. "You wouldn't believe how many people keep trying to either steal it or buy it off of me!"

Raito's eye twitched.

"None-the-less…" The anonymous artist strolled over to the shrine, surprisingly creeped out by the amount of Raito-paraphernalia set around the over-sized picture. "This shrine must go. Only I may be pleasured by Raito-kun's delicious body and presence."

"You are such a freak, Ryuuzaki." Misa stated, nonchalantly.

Raito could only agree, absolutely mortified.

The older man shrugged as he glared at the monstrous shrine, the age-old possessiveness he felt dominating the ever-logical side of his brain. L half-way turned to leave the room, thoroughly disgusted at the display that most definitely should not have been when something slightly shiny caught the corner of his wide-eyed gaze, his anger once again spiking off the charts.

"Is that a… a… a magazine dedicated to Raito?!"

A sheen of light bounced off the laminated paper as another scandalous picture of Raito with the words "Sexy Raito-Sama all the Time!" on the cover lay innocently on the table next to the Raito-shrine, slightly propped up by the other multiple magazines covering the small space.

On the bottom-right corner of the magazine lay a small picture of Mikami Teru giving a thumb's up, obviously more than happy to have his face plastered next to Raito's gorgeous body.

"Yes?" Misa squeaked.

In a flash, L came nose to nose with the gothic supermodel, hands twitching in anger. "Who else has one of these magazines, Misa-san?"

"Meep." The perky blonde backed up against the wall, large brown eyes widening as she nervously toyed with the hem of her incredibly short black lacy skirt.

"Who DOESN'T have a subscription to "Sexy Raito-Sama all the Time!", created specifically by creepy fan-boy extraordinaire Mikami Teru?" Another female voice joined the conversation, this one much more pleasing than the last. "You'd either have to be related by blood, like moi, or completely and utterly blind to not wanna piece of that sexy man-meat."

"Sayu!" Raito exclaimed, his little sister looking a bit rumpled, but no worse for wear. "I've been looking for you everywhere! Why the hell haven't you answered any of my phone calls?!"

The young girl blushed as she toed the carpet, altogether ignoring the two other people in the room as she mumbled something rather discreetly.

"What was that?" The gorgeous brunette was really not in the mood for his sister's suddenly shy disposition, quite sure the innocent act was hiding something he really wasn't going to like.

"I SAID that I lost my phone at the club aftermeetingupwithsomebodyonthedanceflooranddrinkingandhavingagoodtime."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Met with whom now?"

"Raito-kun understood that jumbled mess of words?" L asked admirably, moving his sights from the magazine to the giant picture of his Rai-chan on display for all the world (and Misa for God's sakes!) to see.

Even if it was kind of hot.

Sayu blushed once more, taking note of Raito's furious temperament beginning to shine through.

"Somebody… nice?"

"Sayu…"

"Raito, I'm not a little kid anymore." The hyperactive sister sighed as placed her hands on her hips, her lips curling into a frown. "I know you want to protect me, but this is ridiculous. Misa was with me the whole time, anyways."

Everyone just stared at the young girl in exasperation, including Misa herself.

"What?!" The pretty brunette exclaimed, blinking in naivety. "At least I wasn't by myself!"

"You might as well have been." L ground out, not even wincing as the bubbly blonde herself grabbed a rather heavy looking metallic vase and threw it at his head.

Raito couldn't help but think he pretty much deserved that.

It was at the sound of L's voice the second time around that caused Sayu's eyes widened, a dreamy mist seeping through the young girl's gaze as she skipped over to her older brother, a rather mischievous grin setting over her lips.

"But enough about me onii-chan! How have YOU been?"

Raito's eye twitched at the memories of the strange wake-up call, worriment for his sister, making out with his boyfriend in a car whilst his driver was IN said car, being traumatized by his oh-so-kinky parents, and embarrassment of being put on the spot by his lover about his friend's, fans, and all of his ex-lover's creepy idolization.

"I've been better."

"Everything good between you and lover boy?" Sayu whispered, glancing at the older man out of the corner of his eye as L shooed Misa away from his immediate person and continued to gaze up at the nude picture of his lover.

Raito turned to the side, a slow smile spreading across his face as his lover began to drool, still staring at the naked picture of himself that hung over the huge shrine made for the up-and-coming artist.

L would always be a person that would want to do things his way, and would use whatever means to get what he wanted. He would probably lie to Raito, try to manipulate him, make up stories, and even scheme to ensure his own success.

There was an air of aloofness to the man that even now made him unreachable; something he covered up using his supposed perverseness and very random comments. Yet it was all an act; smoke and mirrors used to cover up the anger and sadness the man to this day did not know how to deal with.

Sex was L's security blanket; a way to ensure he was cared for and to express to the person he was being intimate with that they were, in some way, revered in return. The random comments were his way of breaking the ice, since already being strange to look at made it easier to play the weirdo card. The impassiveness was the man's shield; a barrier so fragile, Raito was sure even the smallest of instances could (and would) break it.

This one person had a past both so tragic and amazing, that Raito was sure that if fully told, he probably wouldn't even be able to believe it all. L had obviously been through all nine gates of Hell and back, and still had enough room in his heart to feel something other than the overwhelming emptiness that took over a great deal of the man's emotional being. There was so much good and bad that created this one so very complex man that it all becomes distorted so that it made it difficult to say which was which.

Could someone like Raito look past all this emotional chaos and truly cherish the person underneath it all?

"Onii-chan?" Sayu blinked as Raito's small smile bloomed into a full-fledged grin, his eyes a clear mahogany brown as he nodded his head, making his way towards his ready-to-pass-out-from-horniness boyfriend.

"They're as perfect as perfect can be."

Sayu grinned as Raito gave her a wink and strode across the room to grab his preoccupied lover by the wrist, rolling his eyes as the older man gave him one of his signature leers. Raito nodded at Misa, who was now ranting and fuming at the still-ignoring her L, giving her a small pat on the head and telling the young girl not to even bother.

L was off in La-La land anyways.

"Two things before I go, my lovely little sister." Raito stopped at the door, ignoring the now impatient insomniac tugging on his arm. "One; you must now introduce this man or woman you have met and bring them to the house so that they meet proper dating protocols."

"But Raito-!"

"No buts! If I don't meet him within the next week, I'll do it on my **own** terms."

Sayu grimaced.

Her brother got crazy once he got that evil-older-brother-gleam in his eye.

"Raito, you go out with a perverted man whom we still don't know all that well and whom dad wants to murder in brutal and excruciating ways." The young girl dryly stated, quite sure her family was insane. "I think anyone I go out with is a step up in Dad's eyes. I think the hobo that lives in the cardboard box across the street is a freaking prize in Dad's point of view at this point!"

"Which is why I have to meet them." Raito stated.

"And I as well." L finally interjected, nodding in agreement.

"Et tu, Ryuuzaki?" Sayu pouted.

L blinked as he tilted his head to the side.

"Of course, Sayu-chan. Who better to judge any potentially perverse, strange people than a perverse, strange person themselves?" Raito nodded as both men finally reached the doorway, ready to make their way down the hallway and back to Raito's apartment.

"But what about the other thing, Raito?" Sayu asked hesitantly, not sure if she _really _wanted to know by the sudden creeped-out look on both L and Raito's faces.

"… … Don't go back to the house for another three or four hours." Raito finally squeaked.

Sayu blinked.

"And if you do, remember to bring disinfectant, a mind-eraser, and a spare change of clothes." L added in, looking paler than usual.

" Ooooh…" Sayu flinched as the words became apparent, not knowing if she could ever go inside her parent's home without conjuring up the funky imagery her brother and his boyfriend had just implanted in her head.

Misa just tilted her head to the side.

"Huh?"

Without another word, the lover's left the apartment in record time, not even bothering to take the elevator and running down the stairs.

"Look, Grandma! It's those two guys that like to have se-sex-ual re-relations together!" The same little boy from downstairs cried out as the older woman opened the door to one of the apartments, about to step out once again as she blinked in disbelief. "What does that mean anyways, Grandma? Do they like to play a lot with each other?"

The poor woman sweat dropped as she pulled her grandson back inside and closed the apartment door.

Some things were better left unsaid.

* * *

"To your apartment, Raito-kun?" L questioned, both men managing to make it outside without either molesting or killing the other.

"Yeah… Today's been a tiring day." Raito stretched his arms over his head as the cool autumn breeze ran through his auburn locks, eyes closing in contentment. "Are you going to stay over for a little while?"

L smirked as they both entered the car, their driver nodding his own greeting.

"Actually, Raito-kun…"

"_**I'm so addicted to all the things you do when you're going down on me in between the sheets all the sounds you make with every breath you take its not like anything when you're loving me."**_

Raito raised an eyebrow as the pale man's cheeks actually flushed a small bit, grabbing his cell-phone from his pocket as his lover eyed him queerly.

"Please tell me that that's not someone I need to be worried about?" Raito laughingly commented as L pulled his legs up on the seat and snapped open the phone, setting the phone a couple inches away from his ear.

"Of course not, Raito-kun. It is merely Aizawa. The ringtone simply reminds me of Raito-kun and his impressive oral skills in be-"

"Of course." The brunette rolled his eyes as he laid his head against the cushions, ready to take a nice, long afternoon nap.

"Is everything all set, Aizawa?" Raito heard the man mumble, not really paying attention to what the older man was saying. Rumbles were all Raito heard from the other line of the phone as L nodded, his face impassive as he gleamed at Raito from the corner of his dark-eyed gaze.

"Very good. I shall be there shortly."

The younger artist's eyes popped open as L shut his phone, digging it back into his monstrous pockets.

"You're not coming over?" the 23-year-old pouted, nearly breaking L's resolution. "I could make it worth your while…"

"As tempting as that sounds…" The dark-haired sugar-addict ground out as he rubbed his toes against each other. "And trust me, Raito-kun, it is most definitely tempting, I have much to do before our rendezvous tonight."

"Rendezvous?" Large cinnamon-colored eyes peered over at the panda-like man, not liking the satisfied smirk on his face. "When did I agree to go on a date?"

"Does Raito-kun wish to go on a date tonight?"

"Well, yes, but-"

"Just now, then. Now, Raito-kun should get himself prettied-up and ready for a nice evening with his lover, who is just waiting for a good chance to jump his bon-"

"We're here." The driver coughed, having stopped about two minutes ago.

Raito looked over at him gratefully. "Thanks."

"I shall pick Raito-kun up at 6:00 p.m. sharp. Please do not be late." L stated in his usual monotone, his eyes drooping ever so slightly. Raito nodded as he began to step out of the car, glad to finally be in his place of residence.

"And Raito-kun?" Pale fingers quickly grasped onto the younger man's tanned arm, startling the boy as he turned to face the rather vacant-faced artist. "I…"

"You'll see me later?" Raito offered once the raccoon-eyed man refused to speak thereafter.

L simply nodded, letting go of the younger man's arm and watching him as he entered the apartment complex.

"Sir?" The driver questioned, noticing the forlorn look encasing his employer's usually blank features.

"Take me home, if you would please. I have many things I must attend to before 6:00 p.m. tonight." L grabbed a rather scruffy looking lollipop from his back pocket as he zoned out, imagining just what tonight's events would come to signify.

'If only I could say the words, Raito-kun… If only…'

* * *

Disclaimer: So many songs, so little time. I do not own "Foxtrot, Uniform, Charlie, Kilo" by the Bloodhound Gang, "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred (Thanks for the suggestion, Kit-chan!) or "Addicted" by Saving Abel. (Once again, another awesome song suggestion from the great Kitsune55!) Yikes, tone it down much, Hari-chan?

Lol! This chapter managed to disturb even me. And that's just sad. o.o;;;; Hopefully you guys found it as hilarious reading it as I did writing it. Many thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing for me! And now, two more chapters to go! We shall definitely go out with a 'Bang!' if ya know what I mean. Lol!


	29. You Could Be Mine

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Twenty-Nine: _You Could Be Mine_

* * *

"_**Every little thing that you say or do; I'm hung up! I'm hanging up on you! Waiting for your call, baby, night and day, I'm fed up! I'm tired of waiting on you!" **_

Raito groaned as his muddled eyes blinked open, his head still groggy from sleep. Without thinking about it, a hand immediately slammed over the alarm clock that innocently sat next to the man's bed, the music pouring out of it coming to a sudden halt. A shake of a head and a stretch later, the arrogant artist was up on his feet and ready to face a night full of mayhem and most probable molestation.

Strolling past his cell phone, Raito ignored the _(3 Missed Calls)_, knowing L would not even _attempt_ to contact him before six.

The man was that obsessive.

Either that or he just liked to fuck with Raito's head and make him think he was.

Rolling his eyes, Raito ran a hand through his slightly mussed locks and strolled inside his closet, ready for another game of 'What the Hell is Raito Going to Wear Today?!'

* * *

"What to wear, what to wear…"

Raito continued to peruse the wide selection of clothing in front of him as his mahogany brown eyes twittered from section to section. Clothes, all ranging from different styles, colors and varying textures, lay perfectly organized within the multiple racks surrounding the young artist, the incredibly spacious closet brightly lit with fluorescent lighting of various colors.

A small voice, which suspiciously sounded like his lover's own baritone, whispered the inevitable six words that always seemed to make the 23-year-old wince in discomfort.

"_And people __**wonder**__ if__you're gay?!"_

Raito sweat dropped in shame as the bright pink light hanging over his head twinkled cutely in response.

'I really need to get that damn light fixed.' Raito thought to himself as his eye twitched, rifling through his clothing once again.

After the moment of inner-mortification passed, the cinnamon-eyed obsessive compulsive artist haughtily grabbed a formfitting long-sleeved sky blue tee-shirt and a pair of his tightest jeans ('_Gay!' _The wannabe-L voice seemed to scream inside his head. '_GAY!') _from his increasingly growing collection before stomping out of the incredibly large color-and-style coordinated closet, conveniently ignoring the box of porn peeking out from underneath his shoe collection.

"_**At first I was afraid; I was petrified!" **_

Raito sweat dropped as he carefully laid his clothes out on the bed, knowing exactly who it was for once.

"_**Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side… But I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong-"**_

The misanthropic artist rolled his pretty sepia eyes as he made his way to the bathroom, refusing to even look at the cell phone and its caller from Hell. (As he so dubbed the stalker who continuously blew it up)

"_**I grew strong; I learned how to carry on… And so you're back from outer space- I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face…"**_

Grabbing a towel, the 23-year-old entertained himself with thoughts of what would happen later on in the evening; imagining whatever plans L held for the both of them, and hoping they weren't completely and utterly perverted for once.

"_**I should have changed my stupid lock; I should have made you leave your key-"**_

"Oh God, I hope so…" Raito whispered to himself as he shut the bathroom door and got to undressing, a small smirk lingering on his lips as the sound of water pounding against the ceramic tiled floor filled the spacious apartment.

"_**If I had known for just one second you'd be back to bother me!"**_

The small cell phone glowed eerily, the name _Mikami-McStalker-Teru_ blinking across the small screen as it then faded into black.

* * *

Raito should have known from the moment that he had woken up tangled within L's arms earlier that morning that the day wasn't going to run as smoothly as he thought it would.

Hell, he was Yagami Raito.

Of course the fates were meant to fuck with him every chance they could get! It was like a rule at this point!

That was why when Raito had exited the shower and pulled a towel around his waist, wanting nothing more than to go into his room to get ready for his _date-extraordinaire_, he hadn't really been surprised to see Mikami sitting on his bed, curling around his covers as he sniffed his pillowcases.

Creeped out?

Oh Hell Yes.

Surprised?

Sadly enough… not really.

But the young artist digressed.

"Raito-sama!" Mikami grinned, his glasses askew as his eyes widened at the sight of Raito half-naked.

The younger man suppressed a shiver, knowing that when you showed an animal fear, they always went for the jugular. In Mikami's case, he always seemed to go for the pants.

That was just as bad.

"Mikami-kun... How are you?" The 23-year-old smiled as charmingly as he could in the situation he was placed in, panicking within his own mind as the lawyer continued to snuggle deeper within his blankets.

'Why the fuck are you contaminating my bed?!' Raito mentally raved, the bewildered brunette quite sure he was now obligated to burn not only the sheets the unhinged fanatic was basically molesting, but the mattress as well.

Damn. He had actually splurged a bit on that bed.

"Oh, I'm fine, now that I'm with my God…" Mikami grinned as Raito internally grimaced, slowly inching towards the inviting doorway. "Raito-sama has such _wonderful_ sheets…"

'Definitely going to schedule a session with my therapist later.' The artist thought without a doubt, the doorway almost a stride away.

"How did you get into my apartment _this time_ Mikami-kun?" Raito questioned as sweetly as possible, irked at how comfortable the disturbed man was getting on his bed.

"Ex-tra keeeeyyyyy…" Mikami sang out from in between the tussled sheets, delighting in his Raito-sama's scent.

"… … … I never gave you an extra key, Mikami-kun."

"Says who?"

"… Never mind." Raito gave up the battle before it began, knowing Mikami's was a crazy that bent all forms of logic and reason. Hell, the man could probably out-crazy most homicidal maniacs for all the 23-year-old knew.

"Where are you going, Raito-sama?!" Mikami cried out, finally noticing just how close Raito was to leaving his worshipping presence.

"Err…" Raito eyed the hallway leading to his living room. "The kitchen?"

"Why?"

"… After-shower snack?"

"But Raito-sama doesn't have an after-shower snack."

Raito did not want to know how Mikami knew that.

"Raito-sama doesn't want to stay with me." Mikami grew teary-eyed as the artist sweat dropped, knowing that he hadn't exactly been subtle in his let downs. "Raito-sama only cares about that stupid Ryuuzaki and his humongous equipment."

Raito gave the man a sympathetic look as he opened his mouth, prepared to give the man some sort of consolation for all the adoration (even if creepy) given to him. He had idolized Raito, and that had to make up for some of the strange things he had done over the years.

"Mikami-kun, I…"

"But I'll make Raito-sama love me…" The older man whispered, his eyes gaining a rather feral look to them.

"Wha-"

In a blink of an eye, Mikami leapt out of the bed and jumped right on top of the unsuspecting artist, Raito's head catching the edge of the doorway in the lawyer's fit of excitement. Mikami's dark brown gaze was the last thing the injured artist saw before his eyes fluttered closed, leaving nothing but an inky darkness in its wake.

"I'll make Raito-sama love me… if it's the last thing I do."

* * *

L's lips twitched as he entered his Rolls Royce, pulling out his cell phone as the driver then entered the car. A feeling reminiscent to satisfaction filtered the 30-year-old's being as he imagined the look on Raito's face once he saw what he had planned.

He'd have the boy out of his pants in no time flat.

The anonymous obsidian-haired artist waited until it was precisely six p.m. before he actually dialed the number to his lover's phone and patiently waited for the man to pick up, holding the phone as close to his ear as he could without actually having to touch it.

By the fourth ring, the call went straight to voicemail, not worrying the artist in the least, knowing how often the younger man liked to leave the phone laying around in whatever place it so happen to be placed last.

L dialed the number again, not thinking anything of it as he was forwarded to the artist's voicemail once again.

By the seventh call, however, L began to become a little suspicious.

Teeth clenched, pale fingers shoved the phone back into the owner's jean pocket, wide ebony eyes narrowing as the driver blinked at the now solemn look on his boss' face. Even his normally blank façade didn't look quite as stern as the emotion-filled visage weighing heavily on his employer's features.

"Please make haste to Yagami Raito's home."

That was all that was said before the driver put his foot on the gas, making his way out of the mansion's long driveway and into the street, ready for a whole world of weird courtesy of one Yagami Raito.

"Yes, sir."

* * *

"MMPH!"

Thoroughly pissed-off, tied up and gagged (and not in a good way!), Raito sat half-naked in a room that was most certainly not his if the draft was anything to go by, quite sure that if he ever managed to get the hell out of the chair his bottom was chaffing against, he was going to **kill **Mikami.

Painfully.

Though if he really wanted to torture him, he'd just send L after him and let bygones be bygones…

That plan most certainly had its appeal.

"_Damn all these beautiful girls… they only want to do you dirt…"_

_**Clank!**_

The 23-year-old artist shuddered at the sound of the nauseatingly cheerful voice derangely singing the out-of-sync lyrics, not sure what to make of the dangerously close sounds of metal meeting metal.

Being both blindfolded and tied-up, Raito could only wonder what the sick bastard wanted to do with his gorgeous body, but really…

"_They'll have you… suicidal…suicidal…When they say it's over…"_

_**Clank!**_

The cinnamon-eyed artist figured ignorance was bliss. And he needed all the fucking bliss he could get.

_**Clank!**_

_**Clank!**_

_**Clank!**_

* * *

"Hm."

L twisted the doorknob attached to the door leading to his lover's apartment, blinking in surprise as the door creaked open without the slightest bit of protest.

Feet still adorned by ragged sneakers shuffled inside the living space his boyfriend found so dear, the silence resonating from within the apartment deafening the anonymous artist's ears as his wide eyes searched for any sign of his wayward paramour.

Making his way to Raito's bedroom, L inspected the place for any disturbances, none of the rooms looking as if they had been touched by none other than Raito himself.

Until he got to the bedroom.

The bed was a complete mess; sheets tossed whichever way as pillows lay scattered along the mattress. Raito's clothes, which L presumed were the ones he was meant to have on **now** were crumpled on the floor, a small heap next the usually very tidy bed.

Obsidian eyes narrowed as the lean slumping man slowly toed his way to the bed, not the least bit surprised once he saw a piece of white paper outshining the cool blue sheets rumpled against the bed. Two fingers held the paper up to the pair of wide calculating eyes, a twitch developing right over L's obscured eyebrow at the writing presented before him.

'How does Raito garner the attention of all these incredibly strange people?!'

L did an about-face and shuffled out of the room, closing the door on his way out, paper still clutched tightly within his fist.

Mikami was in for a whole lot of pain once he got his hands on him.

* * *

The blindfold was finally off.

That was the first thought in Raito's head once the blinding light smothered his unsuspecting gaze, the boy's ear's literally raped from the length of time of having to listen to Mikami hectically sing his little sing-along-songs.

"Rai-to-sama…"

After 23 years of being on this Earth, Raito was quite sure that if he ever heard another person call him 'Raito-sama' after this experience, he would most likely kill them in the most excruciatingly painfully slow way possible.

"Raito-sama, look at meeeeee…"

Rolling his eyes, the already quite irritated artist turned to the side, eyes widening as he finally caught sight of his kidnapper.

Mikami…

Dress…

Mikami was wearing a fucking dress.

Raito blinked, quite sure his mind was playing tricks on him.

The vision did not disappear, even after the fifth blink.

Where was that blindfold again?

"Don't I look pretty, Raito-sama? Don't I?! Tell me I look pretty, damn it!"

Raito sweat dropped, not even deigning to give the seriously cracked lawyer one of his awesome glares.

Where was L when you needed him?

* * *

"Yes… is that so?"

L stared up at the smooth ceiling of the car, listening to the voice on the other line of the phone as the car continued to glide to his newfound destination.

"How long ago was this?"

The driver glanced back at his boss through the rear-view mirror, blinking as he watched his employer's eyebrows become all the more furrowed.

"Really? I shall be there in a moment's time."

L clicked his phone shut, pulling his legs closer to his chest as he laid the cell phone next to his person. His lips were pulled across his face in a straight line, thin from the amount of force used in keeping the blank façade in place.

Eyes snapped forward to meet the driver's gaze through the mirror, the fire blazing within those depths nearly scaring the crap out of the poor man as he jumped within the driver's seat and kept his sights forward, not wanting to incite the wrath of the blood-thirsty artist that sat behind him.

"Follow my directions as of now and do not dawdle. Take a left here."

God help the person that managed to piss his boss off.

* * *

"I guess Raito-sama didn't like my other look…" Mikami sighed, brown eyes shining with unshed tears.

Raito's eye twitched, taking in Mikami's new outfit with a new sense of hatred that almost startled the artist himself.

"Of course you wouldn't like the dress... Raito-sama is more into the 'disheveled douche-bag' look, and I've delivered!"

Mikami smirked as he stood before the severely traumatized 23-year-old brunette barefoot, ratty jeans hanging off his hips as a plain white long-sleeved tee-shirt completed the look.

Oh, if only this was a nightmare. If only this was a nightmare. If only this was a-

Mikami imitated L's walk to a tee, slumping towards Raito in a slow, unmotivated gait. Without a word of warning, the older unhinged man jumped on top of the bound-and-gagged man as soon as he was within glomping-distance, the air momentarily leaving the poor artist's lungs at the force of the untimed glomp.

"Isn't Raito-sama happy?"

Raito's eye twitched once again.

* * *

L patiently waited for the elevator to reach the ground-level, twiddling his toes within the confines of his dirty sneakers as he pushed his hands into his pockets. Dark eyes glanced up at the lowering numbers above the elevator doors, wondering if he should have brought a bat for good measure.

Reaching a hand up from his jean pockets, the eccentric artist scratched his head, tilting his head to the side as the doors finally opened with a 'ding!'

Nah… his hands would suffice.

* * *

"I made your favorite, Raito-sama!" Mikami gleefully exclaimed as he shoved a foreign substance against his enclosed lips, ignoring the cringe of discomfort passing through the young male's face.

"MMPH, MMPH!"

At least that exclaimed the random chopping and banging…

"Oh! I almost forgot! If I take Raito-sama's restraints off and take out the gag, will he promise to be good and not scream?"

Raito gave the man a dead stare that would've made L proud, not having it in him to even lie at this point.

"… Guess not. Oh well."

Mikami continued to cuddle the prickly, half-naked man glaring at him from the chair he was now perched against, forcing the younger, much saner man to endure his creepy bouts of craziness.

"Raito-sama is so cuddly…"

Eye twitch.

"And soft…"

Eye twitch.

"And handsome…"

Eye twitch.

**"And not yours."**

Eye pop.

Raito's disbelieving eyes widen at the sight of L standing by the door, a glare so menacing it put even the bound artist at ill-ease.

"Get off of him."

Mikami didn't even twitch, choosing to ignore the man standing behind him in a fit of aloofness. The lawyer's arms tightened around Raito's mid-section as the brunette rolled his eyes, knowing that this was just going to turn into a battle of the wills that would just leave him angry and disillusioned.

Did he mention scarred for life, as well?

Yeah… that sounded about right.

"I realize people plagued with insanity tend to hear voices in their heads, so I will respect Mikami-san's ignorance on my first command. Now, I will re-iterate my first statement to Mikami-san again, and if you refuse to comply, then you will only have yourself to blame. Get. Off. Of. Him. **Now**."

Once again, Mikami did not move a muscle.

Raito sighed, the muffled sound lost on both men in the room.

L glared.

Mikami ignored.

And then…

L made his move.

In a blink of an eye, the anonymous artist went from one side of the room to another, grabbing Mikami by the collar of his shirt and pulling him away from Raito's seated body. After a moment of flying arms and piercing glares, L threw the lawyer onto the ground and continually kicked him right in the ribs, Raito grimacing at the sound of rubber hitting flesh.

Mikami attempted to stand, hand gently kneading the now bruised area on the left side of his torso, before L pushed him onto the ground once again, fist flying forward as they laid aim onto the crazed lawyer's face again and again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Raito sweat dropped.

After ten minutes of watching L punch the now unconscious man in the face, Raito grew tired of being ignored. Jumping within the seat, the agitated artist glared over at the enraged raven-haired man still beating on the fanatical idiot who's face was now bruised beyond recognition.

"… MMPH!"

L blinked over at the man stewing angrily in the chair, hand raised in the air.

"Raito-kun is still tied up and unable to speak."

Raito's eye twitched.

'No shit, Sherlock.'

* * *

"Raito-kun should not be so displeased."

The 23-year-old artist said nothing as he rubbed at his chaffed wrists, still dressed in just a towel within the backseat of L's Rolls Royce.

Raito didn't care how embarrassed he was, he refused to go near of Mikami's things, let alone his _clothes_.

"Raito-kun, say something…"

"Something?" Raito snapped back, not exactly in any mood to reassure his lover he was _perfectly fine and dandy, thank you very much! _"How did you know I was at Mikami's anyway?"

"Isn't Raito-kun pleased that I found him before any molestation happened to him?" L queried, evading the question for all it was worth. "Or anything _worse _than molestation? At least he was not scarred for life…"

"Well, let's see… I was knocked unconscious in my own home, bound up, gagged, and blindfolded whilst I was still half-naked and comatose, dragged into a crazy person's apartment, forced to sit down in an extremely uncomfortable chair that gave me Indian burn _on my ass_, and watched some freaky weirdo prance around his apartment whilst doing god knows what while wearing dresses and then to top it all off, tried raping me whilst cosplaying as _you_. Gee, you're right, L! It's not like I was traumatized or anything…" Raito flicked his bangs away from his eyes, trying to cover up as much as of his body as he could from the pervert's piercing gaze. "And stop avoiding the question! How did you know where to find me?!"

"… … Raito-kun will not believe me." L stated dryly, pushing a thumb to his mouth as he began to nibble on the digit diligently.

"Why?" Raito asked disbelievingly.

"Well, Mikami told me." The artist blurted out, handing the shocked man the sheet of paper he had found within Raito's bedroom.

Raito blinked once more before looking down at the note within his hand, not sure what to expect from one as crazy as Mikami.

_Ryuuzaki!_

_Leave Raito-sama alone! He's mine now! Stupid pervert!_

_Mikami Teru_

Raito sweat dropped.

"Somehow… I'm not surprised." Mocha-colored eyes closed as the towel-clad man leaned back against the chair, allowing the slip of paper to fall to the floor as sleepily sighed. After a moment of silence, Raito heard a rustle of clothing creep closer to his person, feeling the heated stare of the older pervert's gaze from behind his closed eyelids.

"Don't even think about it, L."

L pouted as he shifted back onto his side of the backseat, counting the minutes before they arrived to his home, already concocting plans which included Raito, him, and no clothes whatsoever.

* * *

"Why are we at your house?"

"We had a date, Raito-kun. Have you forgotten this fact?"

"… … L, I still have no clothes on."

"Oh, Rai-chan. That just saves us half the battle."

"L!"

A perverted grin rested over L's lips as Raito angrily glared at his boyfriend, still wearing nothing but the thin towel barely covering his privates.

"I am not going to walk around your house in the nude whilst a bunch of maids and butlers ogle at my behind!" The young artist flailed his arms in the air, an angry blush settling over his cheeks as L tilted his head to the side, watching the entertaining youth in all his glory.

"Would Raito-kun like for me to send my maids and butlers home, then?"

"Gah! No, Raito-kun does not! And that's not the point, L!"

"Then what is the point?"

"…"

"Raito-kun?"

"… Just give me some damn pants, you perverted freak."

Knowing a victory when he saw one, L simply smirked, grabbing his lover's hand as he led him inside his mansion in smug satisfaction.

"Of course, Raito-kun."

* * *

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"You know what."

"Know what, what?"

"L…"

"Raito-kun…"

Molten caramel brown eyes narrowed as Raito crossed his arms against his now shirt-clad chest, lamenting the lack of fashion suitable for him in the house. Of course L's closet would be stocked full of clothes…

Just all the same clothes.

At least Raito knew he actually changed once in awhile and didn't wear the same thing over and over again.

"Where are we going, you smartass." The disheveled insomniac cocked his head to the side before tugging on the white sleeve of Raito's shirt, pulling him towards their given destination as the 23-year-old followed blindly. "Are we even going anywhere, or are you just going to shove me into your bedroom and lock the door for the next 48 hours?"

"As tempting as that sounds, Raito-kun, there is a destination I have in mind before we take our activities to the bedroom." L continued to lead them both down a long hallway, bypassing the stairs leading towards the door downstairs completely and continuing onward.

"Really? You're not just being sneaky, are you? Because you won't get laid that way." Raito grumbled, not in the mood to be duped. L rolled his eyes, knowing his lover would not be able to see the disbelieving look on his face.

"Of course not, Raito-kun. If I wanted sex, we both know I would not have to beat around the bush to get some."

"…"

Biting his thumb rather anxiously, L came to a stop in front of a random door, looking back at the disgruntled youth in something akin to nervousness. "Is Raito-kun ready?"

"For what?" The 23-year-old inquired, more curious than irritated at this point.

"For our date." L answered simply, pushing the door open with one hand as the other continued to grip Raito's sleeve. Without another word, the eccentric artist pushed the younger man within the room, ignoring the wide-eyed look of shock set on the brunette's face as he took in the room surrounding them.

The room held no furniture within it except for a small table in the middle of the spacious room and a large couch facing the balcony window on the far side of the room. Paintings hung around the walls, creating a sort of collage of art around almost every open space of wall that was available to the canvases. Scarlet red curtains skirted the ground as the summer breeze gently drifted over from the open balcony doors.

Raito's gaze once again hit the table, taking in the lone candle that sat on the middle of the table within the room, two plates filled with food already placed on each sides of the table in preparation for the people about to enjoy their meal there.

"Wha…?" Was Raito's intelligent reply, not sure how to take in candlelit dinner from _L_ of all people.

"Come, Raito-kun. Our food will get cold."

Allowing himself to be pulled once again, the younger man plopped down on the chair and continued to look around, the canvases covering the room displaying a variety of imagery and perspective.

"You… actually planned out a romantic dinner?"

"Yes."

"Just the two of us?"

"Yes."

"… You?"

L blinked over at the confused boy, irritated by the show of questions, yet not wanting to show so.

"Yes, Raito-kun."

"… … … Damn. That's so out of character, I'd give you an award if I had one."

"It is out of character to show someone I… care for that I cherish them?" L stared up at the ceiling, damning his mouth as it once again went on autopilot.

"… Are you groping me?"

"No."

"Then yes. Yes it is."

Without another word, they both began to pick at their food, one uncomfortable with their surroundings and what they seemed to imply and the other wondering just how he was going to be able to put his feelings into words… without mincing them in the process.

Both Raito and L sweat dropped.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Plates were left on the table, maids quietly coming in and taking them into the kitchen as they locked the door behind them, as per their employer's orders. Before leaving, the young woman carefully swiveled the plates within her arms and made it towards the small radio resting on top of the fireplace and turned it on, hoping to relieve the tension at least a bit.

The two men got up from their seats, making their way to the couch that lay a couple of feet in front of them rather silently, absently listening to the soft music playing in the background, still not sure what to say to the other. The actual dinner itself had passed in a somewhat stony silence, both men not being able to confront what was actually forefront on their minds.

_**"The boring days started to shine quite suddenly since the day you first appeared." **_

"So…"

_**"I felt I mind neither the solitude nor the agony..."**_

"Yes…"

Both men stared at each other, an even more uneasy hush settling over the two artists who usually found comfort in the other's presence.

"L…"

_**"I'm just a prisoner of love." **_

"Raito…"

_**"Just a prisoner of love." **_

"Ah." Raito stepped forward, uncharacteristically bashful as he kept his gaze on the floor underneath him, not sure how to say what he wanted to say without blurting it outright. "What I want to tell you is…"

**_"Prisoner of love, prisoner of love... I'm a prisoner of love."_**

Bare feet scuffed against the carpet as a dark red blush burned the 23-year-old's cheeks in a fit of embarrassment. It figured that two men who had no problem expressing their ideas and outlook on life on canvas would be so emotionally stunted when it came to actually vocalizing their feelings.

**_"Both illed time and comforting time; both the stormy day and the sunny day..." _**

"I…"

**_"Let us walk together." _**

Before Raito could get another word out, L quickly pushed the younger man onto the couch and set himself over his boyfriend, arms winding around his middle as the dark-haired artist buried himself within the crook of his lover's neck.

"Err…"

"I like Raito-kun." L mumbled against the boy's neck, quite sure that if anything would get him to shut up it would be that. "I really, really like Raito-kun."

Raito blinked, wrapping his arms around the older man's torso, not sure why he felt the sudden need to get closer to the much more experienced artist. Really, he was just surprised the man hadn't tried to unzip his pants at this point.

"But sometimes… it doesn't feel like I just _like _Raito-kun…"

The 23-year-old froze, not sure what to say at the sudden confession.

"I want Raito-kun to be with me all the time, cuddled next to me as he complains about the lack of color within his palette. I want Raito-kun to be there on the phone with me, telling me about his dull day with regular merchants and boring conversations he had with Matsuda. I want Raito-kun to be grumbling at me whilst he is in the kitchen, getting more cake for me simply because I am too lazy to do it myself." L slowly picked his head up from the conjunction between Raito's shoulder and neck, wide eyes shadowed by his obsidian bangs as a deep sincerity hung off his every word.

"In short, I want Raito-kun all to myself at all times. It is frustrating to want to reach over and grab you, and know I can't because Raito-kun is busy somewhere else. It is maddening to want to grab the phone and listen to your voice, but cannot because you are busy with someone else whom I do not care about. It is exasperating to want to look at you, but know I cannot simply because you are not there."

Raito watched the man come inch closer to his face, too shocked to actually reproach him for doing so.

"I like Raito-kun so much, it hurts sometimes. And yet… I know this is not just a _like_ feeling that causes this pain, and that is what makes this even worse." Pale hands gently moved up the stunned man's sides, burying themselves within the silken locks of auburn hair that always seemed to fall perfectly over the boy's pure brown eyes.

"L…" The whisper went on unnoticed, the two men lost in each other's eyes as emotion spilled over, the words coming out without thought for once. "I feel the same way too."

"Raito-kun?" Ebony black eyes widen just a bit more as the artist leaned forward, resting his weight on his elbows in an effort to get as close to the older man as possible.

"I like L too. So much, that sometimes it hurts me as well." Cherry red lips curved into a sweet smile as Raito bit his lip in an effort to keep it all in. "I want L with me when I'm so tired, that I could just fall over his lap and go to sleep knowing that he's right next to me still working on his latest painting and doesn't have the time to entertain me but does anyway. I want to listen to L's voice when I can't be next to him, because I don't feel right unless I hear it at least once everyday. I want to grumble about being L's manservant and get his damn cake, because I know afterwards he'll stop what he's doing and hold me, even if for just a second."

"But I don't get frustrated when I can't touch you, or annoyed when I can't see you, or even upset when I can't hear your voice. Only worried that maybe you don't want anymore; scared that you've found someone more interesting than me." The smile slowly slid off Raito's face as leaned back against the cushions of the couch once more, L fully reclining against the younger man's chest as the words of insecurity were finally let out into the open after two weeks of wondering the same thing over and over again.

"So you see L, I understand how much it hurts to like someone so much and not understand how to show them. To want to be with them and yet be scared of how much you want only them. And I know that what I'm feeling isn't just a _like _feeling either… but I can't say that I hate feeling this way…" Lips lay only centimeters away as Raito's mouth bloomed into a full-fledged grin, eyes sparkling with pure emotion. "But if you want me to be frank about it L, I could think of a lot worse people to be in love with than a famously anonymous perverted artist with a dark past."

Not even a second after the last word left Raito's mouth, a pair of slightly moist lips covered his own, causing him to laugh from the feeling of euphoria clouding his bliss-addled mind. Raito considered pulling away, just to taunt the overly-enthusiastic pervert, but figured that would only ruin the moment.

"Raito…" L breathed out as he pulled away quickly, still hovering over the 23-year-old's face as a pale pink blush hung daintily over his cheeks.

"Yes, L?"

"… … I want some cake."

Raito sweat dropped.

"Just cake?" The brunette asked caustically, his hazel brown eyes rolling in mock-irritation.

"Well, if you're offering…" L grinned perversely as he gently kneaded his lover's behind, a tick developing over Raito's brow. "I'll have some 'Raito-kun,' too."

"How the hell did you manage to get your hand in between the cushions and my ass?"

"Raito-kun, there is nothing in this world that can keep me from that delicious booty."

"That's just creepy."

"Creepily sexy."

"Nor does that make any actual sense."

"Is Raito-kun going to have sex with me or not?"

"…"

"Then Raito-kun should shut his mouth and take off his pants."

"You're so romantic."

"Pants. Off. Now."

"Will you get mad if I don't?" Raito smirked at the sudden frown overcoming his lover's face, his hands perched over his shirt as L glared down at the mischievous man lying down below him.

"If Raito-kun does not take off his pants within the next five seconds, I will be forced into action. Raito-kun, do as you're told and take off your damn pants."

Raito glared up at the man above him, hands steadily at his side.

That was all it took before L slowly climbed up off the couch and walked out of the room.

The wary brunette blinked in wonderment, not sure whether or not he should be running or not.

To delay any sex whatsoever with L was a train wreck waiting to happen.

And happen it did.

"L…" Raito felt his eye begin to twitch once more as the detective entered the small room once again, locking the door behind him with one hand whilst carrying a metallic object in the other. "Where did you get those handcuffs from?"

L grinned perversely once again.

Raito figured it was best just not knowing.

* * *

Disclaimer: ((giggles)) I do not own "Hung Up" by Madonna, "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor, "Beautiful Girls" by Sean Kingston, or "Prisoner of Love" by Hikaru Utada (As per suggestion from Kitsune55, who is my partner in sap! Lol! )

Lol! This chapter gave me so much hell, but once I finally grasped it by the balls, it was easy riding from there. O.o; Wait, I did it again... Lol! I've got to stop my pervertedness from leaking through! Oh... damn it all. XD So, did everyone enjoy this chapter? Huh? I hope so! One more chapter, than it's all done. ((sniffle)) My poor baby... But I digress. Many thanks to Kitsune55 for beta-ing this monster of a chapter for me! If I could send you cookies, I would! But... then they'd be all stale and gross... so yeah. No cookies. Lol! Thanks for reading! See ya soon!


	30. Love, or Something Like it

Title: _**Discordant Harmony**_

Chapter Thirty: _Love, or Something Like it_

* * *

"You know you're not coming anywhere near me with those handcuffs, right?"

Raito glared at the older man grinning perversely at him, eye twitching in agitation.

"But Raito-kun…" L pouted cutely, jingling the handcuffs in a last ditch attempt.

"Last time you used those stupid metal deathtraps, my wrists were sore for days!" The sleepy brunette cried out, refusing to even let the shiny contraptions anywhere near his poor, dainty wrists. "Unless you plan to be the one handcuffed, I suggest putting them back from wherever the hell they came from and getting your ass over here before I change my-"

Not even three seconds later, the handcuffs were nowhere to be found and a warm body was securely tucked in next to Raito on the couch.

The 23-year-old blinked.

"O… k…"

"Why are Raito-kun's pants still intact?" L asked, voice suspiciously muffled against the crook of Raito's neck.

The exasperated artist rolled his eyes as he wrapped his arms around the thin insomniac, trying to get in the most comfortable position possible.

Who knows what the hell L planned to do whilst Raito wasn't on his full guard?

"Why are yours?" The supposedly bootylicious artist snapped, once again barely blinking before a pair of ragged jeans came flying over head, shoulders pinned back against the couch as a pair of obsidian eyes gazed down at the shocked 23-year-old.

Raito would have giggled at the incredibly funny face L was making if he wasn't so goddamn scared of it.

"Err…" L's eye began to twitch as the younger of the two men sweat dropped, knowing that he may have gone too far in his teasing. "I love you?"

At the sound of the gentle whisper haltingly leaving the 23-year-old's lips, the grip on Raito's shoulders loosened as the frustration growing within the older insomniac's charcoal gaze dimmed to a low simmer.

"It is not fair that Raito-kun can deflate my anger and anxiousness with the simple application of three words that he does not even mean to use intentionally." A pale hand made its way to L's face as a digit was exposed to the man's lips and nibbled upon. "I shall have to hope that Raito-kun shall not use that tactic often."

Raito rolled his eyes as he pulled the hand away from sugar-addict's mouth mid-chew and shifted his legs beneath L's straddling hold. "Of course not."

"Chances of Raito-kun being both sarcastic and patronizing, up 23 percent."

"Oh shut the hell up, L."

"Chances of Raito-kun faking frustration so that he may diffuse his embarrassment, up 12 percent."

"L… you're not being very compliant at the moment. Don't you want to continue on with what we were doing?"

"Chances of Raito-kun acting out his natural condescension so that I may be blinded by my libido once more, up 1,000,000 percent."

"L, do you want to have sex with me or not?!"

Silence permeated the room as L blinked down at his lover, his face as blank as always before his voice once again filled the room.

"Chances of Raito-kun asking idiotic questions in lieu of recent events, up-"

Without giving the man a chance to say another word, Raito pulled him down to his level, crushing his own velvety lips against his lover's. Hands wrapped themselves into each other's hair as Raito tilted his head, gently suckling on L's lower lip in a silent plea to end the chasteness.

With a gasp, L pulled away from the younger man's lip-lock, eyes blinking up at the sudden pull away in confusion.

"L?" The startled chocolate-eyed artist blinked, not aware of the endearing picture he made for the man sitting above him.

Eyebrows furrowed at the sudden lack of affection, flushed cheeks standing out prominently against the tanned face pulled together into an overall adorably cute pout that just made the older man want to get back to what they were doing. Yet still, L found himself hesitating.

Here he had an absolutely gorgeous man willing to do whatever he wanted, and who understood him better than mostly anyone he had known, including his teacher who had spent years devoted to his pupil, and yet still he could not believe it. L found himself thinking of the future at times when painting became a chore and eating sweets became less than satisfying, and in each vision he had, L saw the temperamental brunette standing by his side, smiling that sweet semi-innocent grin.

"I fear that I may be in over my head, Raito-kun." The dark-haired artist muttered, wide eyes blinking owlishly as the 23-year-old stared up at the overwhelmed man still sitting on top of him astonishingly.

"L, after three months on this roller coaster ride of a relationship, it's only **now** that you're thinking that you're in over your head?" Raito tilted his head to the side, smirk growing across his pink lips. "I hate to break this to you, but I think it's too late to back out of it now."

"I would never dream of the day." L smirked before leaning down and gently raking a hand through the silky brown locks and kissing those wonderfully bruised lips once again.

"L…" Raito gasped as the man pulled away for a moment, breathless from the sudden lip lock. "Don't you think we should… take this to your bedroom?"

L gave the flushed man an incredulous stare.

"… Or maybe not." Raito concurred, knowing just how irritable the older man above him could get when denied something for any length of time.

"I doubt either of us would make it to the hallway, let alone my bedroom, which is on the furthest side of my home from here, Raito-kun." L theorized, causing the brunette to blink in mortification, the thought of him and L going at it in the older man's halls as his maids and butlers watched in shock causing him to almost giggle insanely.

"So you see, Raito-kun, I suggest making yourself **very** comfortable…" The pale-skinned man smirked as the younger (and only slightly more mature) of the two sweat dropped once more. "As neither of us shall be moving until the early morning dawn… or perhaps later if Raito-kun allows me to have my way."

'Spoiled brat…' The younger artist thought to himself amusedly as he rolled his eyes, grinning slightly as L began to entertain himself with the younger man's neck. The sharp feel of teeth lightly biting the soft skin presented to the older man as his tongue gently traced each bruise and indentation caused the now antsy boy to gasp as he flinched at the contact, smile steadily rolling off his face as L continued to work his way down. 'But he's **my **spoiled brat, so I guess that makes all the difference.'

"Too… many… clothes…" Raito heard L mutter as he began to attack the long sleeved shirt he wore without abandon, pulling his arms up as the disgruntled artist practically ripped the piece of cloth off of his head and nibbled on his collarbone with need. Hands gripped onto shoulders as Raito bit his lower lip, wondering just how badly L would hit him if he just got up and walked out of the room.

"Raito-kun should stop thinking his cock-blocking thoughts now and take off his damn pants as he should have done about 15 minutes ago."

The younger artist blinked.

'… … how the hell does he do that?'

"Raito-kun, if I have to persist in inquiring about the continual use of these infernal pants-"

"They're your pants!" Raito cried out, practically flailing in his nearly enclosed position against the comfortable couch.

"I may have to consensually rape Raito-kun…" L continued on, ignoring the astonished look sent his way as he began to gnaw at his thumb in frustration. "Repeatedly until my point gets across."

"… What the hell?" The cinnamon-eyed 23-year-old simply stared up at his over the top boyfriend, wishing for one moment that he could understand the man's way of thinking.

"I have already told Raito-kun once before, it is not **truly** rape if the other person is willi-"

Raito glared at the older man, his malicious gaze cutting off the sentence before the seemingly tense artist could finish it.

"Too much, Raito-kun?" L blinked in wonderment, hands pausing in their sudden quest of Raito's jeans.

The glare itself only strengthened in response.

L sighed, rolling his eyes as he arched up, lunging at the button of the brunette's (which were really L's, as the 23-year-old so kindly put it) jeans and practically ripped off the zipper in anxiousness.

"Err…" Raito sweat dropped at the look of concentration L had on his face, eyes narrowed as his irises darkened, pupils beginning to widen imperceptibly in response. "L?"

"Lift your hips, Raito-kun." The wide-eyed brunette did so in compliance, a little scared at the way the older artist practically tore the pants off of his legs and feet. Sitting up against the cushions of the couch, Raito's own eyes glistened as L threw the pair of jeans over his shoulders, eyeing the boy he was straddling with something akin to anticipation.

For a moment, both men simply stared at each other.

Raito took in the anonymous artist's tousled charcoal hair, strands obscuring his forehead and hanging in front of his large murky eyes. A faintly pointed nose led down to a pair of thin lips, slightly open as the man gasped for small puffs of breath. The smooth expanse of skin seemed to radiate within the dark room, the slivers of light pouring in from the open window the only source of light as it hit the pallor of the man's face and chest in small instances.

It seemed strange that after a night of nothing but emotional escapades that it was now that Raito felt truly exposed (and he didn't mean physically) to the meandering artist he had come to care so much for…

L blinked as his lover bashfully looked down towards the floor, his smooth chocolate locks falling against his eyes and cheeks in a waterfall of silkiness. Smoldering mocha-colored eyes closed slightly, the blush staining his lover's face becoming all the more vibrant against his caramel skin tone. Without realizing it, the 23-year-old bit his lower lip, their cherry red hue becoming all the darker as he continued to nibble on the flesh in question.

Though they had had sex many times, this would be their first encounter truly understanding the other. It seemed strange that now that he had the boy right where he wanted him, it would be now that L would become the most hesitant…

"Raito-kun…"

Raito glanced up at the older man, surprised the hoarseness of his normally smooth baritone voice.

"Yes, L?"

There was a moment of silence, before…

"… … Do you happen to have any lubricant on you?"

Raito sweat dropped.

"No, L. I don't."

"Oh… then I suppose I shall have to get up then… or perhaps one of the maids could pick up a tube from my room…"

And then proceeded to push the dark-haired man off the couch.

"Will you EVER stop being a pervert?!"

L stared up at the man with incredibly wide eyes, a pout set on his lips as he began to chew on his thumb, his dark boxers clashing with the bright red carpeting of the room.

"Does Raito-kun expect me to?"

The tan-skinned man sighed as he rolled his eyes, standing up as he turned away from the cute artist still sprawled on the ground and grabbing his pants from behind the couch.

"What is Raito-kun doing?" L asked dubiously as his twitchy boyfriend slipped the pants back on and quickly walked past him without so much as a shirt on.

"Where do you think I'm going?" The exasperated brunette deadpanned, barely looking over his shoulder as he reached the door.

"… I like the strawberry kind, Raito-kun."

Raito's eye twitched.

"You're an ass."

L grinned.

"Actually, Raito-kun is the 'ass' in this relation-"

_**SLAM!**_

"-ship."

The artist blinked before picking himself off the floor and lounging back on the couch in satisfaction.

'I wonder if one of the butlers would be able to acquiesce to retrieving me a slice of strawberry cheesecake before Raito-kun returns…'

* * *

Raito grumbled as he blushed furiously, ignoring the crash on his left side as he bypassed one of the few maids still out at this time of night watering some plants.

Shoving the tube of lube within his pocket (Jesus, did L's pants need pockets this deep?!), the 23-year-old quickly made his way back to the room which held his extremely strange lover, probably still sitting on the floor whilst nibbling a hole into his poor abused thumb.

'Sometimes, I have to wonder just what it is that I see in the man…'

Finally catching the door he needed, Raito pulled it open only to close it almost immediately after.

Raito blinked.

Raito then blinked again.

Without another word, the nerve-raked artist slowly opened the door, only to be faced with the same image as before.

L no longer lay on the floor, but rather was sprawled out against the couch, delightfully molesting a piece of what could have been a cheesecake.

In the complete nude.

Raito blinked just one last time, if only for effect.

"L…"

'Please tell me you at least waited until you had your damn cake before they caught you naked.' Raito thought to himself as he sweat dropped.

"Raito-kun!" L flung the plate over the couch, missing the wince Raito sent his way, the crash of the ceramic dining utensil splitting the silence open quite viciously.

The younger of the two only shook his head, knowing that no matter what he said, all he would be met with was an innocent stare and a tilt of a head.

Closing the door behind him, Raito squinted as the same inky darkness as before permeated throughout the room. L kept his place on the couch, simply staring at the boy as he walked closer to where he lay.

Liking the silence between them (As L had a way of spoiling the mood with just a word from his mouth), Raito carefully toed his way over L, taking his time in pulling his legs over on either side of the older man's lap and settling himself over the still sedentary artist milky white thighs.

L smirked, catching the boy off guard as the moonlight illuminated the older man's face for a split second.

"Raito-kun is always complaining about him not being on top enough." The soot-eyed man relaxed even further as his lover rolled his eyes, taking out the lube and throwing it against his chest. "Look! I have relinquished all control in favor of allowing Raito-kun to be the one to do all the work."

"I don't think I could be seme even if I tied you up and strapped you to a table." Hands carefully curled themselves around soft auburn strands of hair as L leaned up and kissed the pout off of the 23-year-old's face. Raito's own fingers clenched against the smooth bare shoulders offered, tilting his head in an attempt to deepen the lip lock. "You manage to get yourself out of it every single time."

"That is because Raito-kun enjoys being uke." L mumbled in between kisses, one hand woven into the boy's hair as the other trailed down Raito's tanned back. Raito huffed once more, ignoring the lips moving down from his own mouth to his neck as he wiggled against L's bare thighs.

"Or that's what you tell yourself whenever I at least try to top…"

"Hm…" Gently trailing his hand against Raito's abdomen, L caught the button of the 23-year-old's jeans once again as he deftly snapped it open, and slowly pulled down the zipper of the pants in an effort to maintain some sort of control. "Raito-kun may think whatever he would like if it assists in his sleeping at night."

Raito would have growled out a scathing retort, but was not given a chance to as a hand delved itself into his boxers and began to gently stroke his length through his boxers and cut off his comment before he was given a chance to even say a word.

"Ass." Raito spat out once the hand was removed in a teasing fashion, the man he was straddling nearly giggling in glee.

Raito made an inward grimace at the image of L actually _giggling_.

"I was merely making a point, Raito-kun." L smirked, pulling the jeans down as Raito lifted himself up and practically threw them off himself. "Or should I say, Rai-chan?"

"Call me 'Rai-chan' again and you shall find yourself missing a certain appendage from your body and discovering it within your oven, toasted to perfection."

L stared a Raito for a moment, wondering if the boy would go through with the threat.

Raito's eye twitched, proving himself to be completely serious.

"Raito-kun is in need of anger management, then." L blinked as Raito's hands dropped from his shoulders, tilting back from his grasp.

"You know you're only cock-blocking yourself now, right?" Raito dryly stated, ready to release himself from his lover's embrace and go home.

Ebony eyes widened before the hands covering the 23-year-old's hair and waist clenched painfully before dragging the brunette to him rather forcefully and dropping against the cushions behind them both. Both sets of eyes closed as mouths slowly dragged across each other, deepening the kisses with each second that passed.

"Raito…" The tube of lube fell off to the side, both men too preoccupied with the other to really pay much heed to it. L lunged for the underwear still hanging off the younger artist's hips, desperately tugging them off as Raito arched up his hips to help in the process. "No foreplay this time. I need you now."

"Impatient much?" Raito gasped out before L caught him by the waist and tackled him to the other side of the couch. "Oomph!"

"… What does Raito-kun think?"

Raito sweat dropped once more, feeling the evidence of L's confession straining against his thigh.

"I see your point. Now where's the lube?"

"…"

"L?"

There was a slight fumbling on L's part, before his trembling monotone filled the room once more. "I cannot seem to find it, Raito-kun."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"We could always go d-"

"No."

"But Rait-"

"Nooooo."

"… Please?"

"How about no?"

"Raito-kun…"

"Would you like me to do you dry, L?!"

"… Did we not establish this, already?"

"Yeah. Well, my ass is officially out of commission, thanks."

L pouted, his throbbing erection now bordering on painful.

Raito sighed, knowing that unless he did something, L would pull a tantrum out of his ass.

"Fine… we'll compromise." Without another word, Raito pushed the man off of him and allowed him to lie down once again. Parting his thigh, L smiled up at the younger man giving him a bland stare, knowing that L wouldn't care how he got an orgasm, as long as he got one.

… … And it didn't include L's _own_ ass.

'Idiot.'

Placing his one of his hands on top of one of scrawny artist's thighs, Raito leaned down, his eyes still on his lover's anticipating face. Midnight black eyes narrowed as a lustful gleam entered the man's gaze, fists clenching at his side as Raito finally stopped inches away from the head of his raging erection.

"Raito-kun is an eternal tease." L puffed out, wanting to grab the younger man by the hair and shove himself into that delectable mouth barely inches away from his length.

"Well, can you blame me?" Raito smirked, loving the frustration rolling off the anonymous artist in waves. "Seeing you like this really turns me on…"

L made a sound reminiscent to a growl as the brunette leaning against him chuckled. With his free hand, Raito traced the underside of the man's penis, carelessly stroking the head before lightly grasping it by the base.

"Do you really want me to-"

"Raito-kun, I believe you have exacted whatever revenge you felt necessary to inflict upon me." L choked out, tired of the age old cat-and-mouse game the 23-year-old loved to play. "Does Raito-kun not believe enough is enough?"

A deep chuckle was Raito's only reply before finally taking his lover's erection within his mouth and hummed quite amusedly as L groaned in satisfaction. Slightly pulling back, Raito languidly raked his teeth and tongue over the hard rod, enjoying the squirming man silently begging for more.

"Urgh…" It was rare to hear much of anything coming out of L's mouth when they were having sex, so it was then Raito knew that man had not been kidding about his impatience once he began to hear the moans and groans emitted from his mouth. "Rai-Raito…"

Plunging forward once more, Raito tried to relax his throat as much as possible in order to take as much of his lover's erection within his mouth as he could. Slowly speeding up his intake, the brunette's head began to bob enticingly, wincing as L's fingers became entangled in his hair.

L's hips began to arch unconsciously in an effort to force his length in all the more as Raito almost gagged on the engorged penis. With a glare thrown at the general vicinity of L's face, Raito lightly traced the underside of the man's shuddering cock before suckling on his balls.

"Ngh!" L leaned up on his forearms, mouth wide open as he stared down at the man sucking him off. Fingers trailed down the artist's penis as Raito brought his mouth back to the head sucked on it once again. A tanned hand cupped the man's balls as Raito brought his other hand up from L's thigh and steadied himself, engulfing the large erection within his mouth once more and suckling on it as he bobbed his head continuously.

Once he felt the older man's penis twitch within his throat, Raito sped up his dipping until L began pulling on his hair, squirming beneath him only to-

"Oh shit…" L cussed as he came, Raito pulling up and away before the older artist could shoot a load on his face. After a moment of panting, L pulled an arm over his eyes and smirked as the younger man eyed the come dripping over his abdomen and pelvic area in disgust. "Raito-kun… never swallows…"

"… And if you ever expect me to, you're sadly mistaken." Raito snapped back, a glint of silver and blue catching his eye from beside the couch on the floor. "Hm."

"What is it, Raito-kun?" L yawned as he watched his auburn-haired counterpart lean over him and grabbed something from off the floor.

"I think I just found the lube." Raito showed the older man the long tube, both men blinking at the utter stupidity of it all.

"…"

"…"

_**CRASH!**_

Without another word otherwise, L shot up and tackled the younger man once more, bringing them both to the floor in a tangled mess of limbs, lube and come.

"What the hell, L?!"

"… Raito-kun found the lube."

"And?!"

"… I shall repeat myself for Raito-kun's comfort, as he seems to be hard of hearing at the moment; **Raito-kun found the lube.**"

"You're an ass, you know that?"

"And Raito-kun loves me all the more for it."

Raito sweat dropped as L grinned perversely, gripping the lube within his hand for all that it was worth.

"Can't argue with that, now can I?"

"No Raito-kun…" L grinned mischievously as he dove in for another kiss, happy this time for a reason other than his semi-compliant lover and the newly found lubricant. "You cannot."

* * *

Epilogue: _A Home to Call Our Own_

* * *

_**Four Months Later…**_

"What the Hell are you doing, L?!"

Dark eyes blinked innocently as they reflexively looked up at the speaker in front of them. The handsome visage of Yagami Raito covered from head to toe in brightly colored paint caught the young man's attention almost immediately.

"Measuring the length of the wall…?" Came the almost hesitant statement turned into a question.

"Measuring the wall?" Raito asked skeptically.

"Yes." Replied L.

"And just how are you measuring the wall… while both staring directly at my ass and having nothing to measure _with_, L?" Sniped the younger of the two artists. Hands positioned themselves over narrow hips as L's attention once again drifted downward…

"L Lawliet!" Came the sharp cry. The misanthropic 23-year-old's patented _Glare of Doom_ ™ rested on his almost heavenly face as L tried to explain himself without looking like an extremely one-minded pervert (and failing miserably once again).

"Multitasking and wall-telepathy?"

A huff escaped the younger artist's lips as he dramatically rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the undecorated part of the wall in their brand spanking new apartment. Who knew moving in together would result in a perpetually horny L?

"Do you want to finish this wall, or not?" questioned Raito. The measuring and drawing had been done for quite awhile (Whether L wanted to use it for an excuse, or not!) and the painting was about halfway done… that is, before his boyfriend decided to space out on him and daydream about his ass. (Which was appealing, but still…)

"Can we not just finish it later, Rai-chan?" Came a voice suspiciously close to Raito's person.

Raito suddenly turned around before he was abruptly pinned to the unpainted part of the wall and pressed close against his boyfriend.

"We'll just take a little break…"

A light kiss was pressed against the pulse of Raito's neck as a moan threatened to release itself from his lips. Eyes fluttered slightly as more pressure was applied to the same spot and L began to gently suckle from the boy's neck.

With effort he didn't even know he had, Raito pushed the older male off of him as L pouted from being pulled away from the delightfully warm body. "L, we have to finish this by tonight. My parents and little sister are coming over tomorrow morning, remember?"

L pouted a bit more before nodding and moving back even further from his tempting lover. Raito sighed in annoyance as he moved towards the direction of their kitchen. "C'mon babe, I think there's still some left over cake from last night in the fridge."

L's countenance brightened almost immediately as he looked at Raito's retreating back, and smiled even wider as his gaze began to travel even lower…

"And stop 'measuring the damn wall,' Lawliet!"

* * *

This was the last of DH I could squeeze out of my brain, so if it leaves you unsatisfied, I can only say... Happy Un-birthday and an I'm sorry to you too. I don't know why, but my DH muse adamantly refused (and still refuses, as my headche can now attest to) to dish out a lemon, so smut is all I can give instead. ((sweat drops)) Honestly, if I spend anymore time on this fic, I think my brain might implode on itself and leave nothing but a vegetable of a writer. If I manage conjure something up, I'll re-upload the chapter and you guys can all celebrate... or whatever... Lol!

The sequel probably won't be out for awhile, but if you recognize the epilogue, you have a slight idea of things to come. But trust me... it gets a whole lot crazier than what you're thinking. XD I suggest checking my profile, as I'll be putting up a little bit of a teaser for the next intsallment of our wonderful little universe. So, many thanks to Kitsune55, who beta-ed this chapter and is just generally kick-ass, and many thanks to you readers have taken this story and brought it to the next level. Now... to bed, Batman! I need a nap. Woosh!


	31. Author's Note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE BIATCHES!**

DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION YET?

Goodie. ^.^

Now, there has been some very stringent nastiness going around FFdotnet this past year and it has been, luckily enough, tossed my way before any damage could be done to me. I've spoken about this in plenty of author's notes but I suppose this is the real deal.

I have created a livejournal account (OMG MY SWORN NEMESIS NOOOESSSS!) and have decided to discontinue my FFdotnet account. All of my work will be transferred to my livejournal and future updates shall be continued there once I am settled in and everything has been moved. I will not delete my account but I will also not re-make it should it be deleted by personnel within the website and douches working with them.

Various readers have been reporting stories and authors due to what they feel is 'disturbing' or 'overly mature' content that should not be shared on FFdotnet. I have done my own part to try to stifle down the onslaught of assholes making it harder for the rest of us fanfic writers but I also am not going to let someone demolish my work simply because they do not like it. It's not what I stand for and I am not someone who takes such things lying down peacefully. Please, if you know of such people contact other writers, contact FFdotnet workers via the links provided overhead and don't let such people censor whatever it is they want to based on their own personal opinion and no one else's. Discrimination should never be tolerated, especially when it comes to the basis of stories which don't have to be read if the reader feels they do not want to, whether the content be 'disturbing' or not. :-P

The link to my livejournal is on my profile page. If anything is to happen to said profile page just type 'hari_aisu' in the livejournal search; you'll find me if you look for me. :)

Once again, I thank you guys for all the support you've given me on this site. If you wish to contact me you can still PM me; I will still answer any and all review/messages/emails and my aim is still the same. I hope all of my readers continue to follow me, whether you have a livejournal or not.

So in classic Hari-Aisu flourish-

THANKS YOU GUYS. YOU KNOW MAMA LOVES YOU LOOOOOOOONG TIIIIMMMMEEEEE! XD


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